Third Crisis
by ArtemisApollo97
Summary: Aaah, the Haddock children are all grown up! And, may I say, they're absolutely WONDERFUL children, I mean, seriously, you've got a homicidal maniac who takes after her mother, the would-be future chief if he wasn't so nervous and the little ray of sunshine that wants to play in the flowers rather than the weaponry. Way to go Hiccstrid! Basically, parenting is hard D:
1. Chapter 1

**Some of you may recognise this as it was the original** _ **Second Crisis**_ **beginning, but here it is as the beginning of** _ **Third Crisis**_ **! As usual, none of the canon characters are mine, but there are a few OCs floating around and causing trouble, etc. etc. blah blah blah. Enjoy! :D**

* * *

"Ah, look! He's going to cry!"

"Go away!" Alastor tried to sound threatening or authoritative or _something_. Anything but scared, his voice trembling as much as his hands. They only laughed at him, doing cruel imitations.

"You're no son of the chief!" Arne taunted. Alastor winced, tucking his hands under his arms to conceal their shaking. Arne's two meathead friends, Rolf and Snorre nodded and chortled harshly in agreement.

Arne shoved Alastor, calling him a stupid fishbone. That stung. It was often joked about of how Hiccup used to be before he united the Vikings and the dragons- he had been a talking fishbone, a nuisance. Alastor used to find those young Hiccup stories funny until some of the old insults had been redirected at him. Hiccup had learnt to laugh them off, but Alastor hadn't. "Not going to fight back, wimp? Why don't you run home and cry to Mummy?" He shoved Alastor again, more force this time.

All three of them were at least twice Alastor's size and weight. While the chief's nine year old son was slight with his mother's blonde hair and his father's striking green eyes, he had inherited neither Astrid's fierce nature nor Hiccup's warped sense of humour or ability to deflect harsh comments fairly easily. His three tormentors were all muscle-bound, pig-nosed idiots with nasty streaks that could easily run loops around Berk. And they didn't smell any better either.

Snorre nudged Arne and muttered something in his ear. Arne gained a wicked grin, his mud brown eyes narrowing into devilish slits. Rolf leaned in to be filled in with whatever plan had come up now. Arne shook his head. "I'll just show you." And he pushed Alastor off the dock and straight into the ice cold water.

Instinct and shock took over; Alastor gasped, water sloshing into his lungs and sending freezing spikes of pain into his brain. He was a weak swimmer as it was and, in his panic, he struggled to right himself underwater. The surface was drifting away, darkness tinging the edges of his vision as his chest seared in demand for air.

* * *

Hiccup stormed in, carrying something small wrapped in his fur cloak and dripping water all over Astrid's freshly cleaned floor. Astrid hadn't seen him in such a temper since Snotlout thought it would be a good idea to tell the twins to launch a Zippleback attack on the arena for a 'joke'.

"Daddy!" Aloe beamed, unaware of her father's annoyance. "What's that?" She pointed at the bundle. Hiccup didn't answer, catching his wife's gaze as he climbed the stairs. Astrid ordered Ingrid to finish feeding Toothless and Stormfly and hurried after him.

"What happened?" She demanded as Hiccup set the cloaked bundle on Alastor's bed.

"Those _gits_ pushed him into the water."

"Arne?" Hiccup nodded, his jaw clenching in infuriation. He unwrapped the bundle carefully, revealing an unconscious and soaking wet Alastor. "Where's my axe?" Astrid growled. Hiccup wasn't listening, monitoring his son carefully. He was breathing, albeit shallowly. "How long was he under for?"

"A few minutes. I was trying to sort out Trader Johan's shipment when I couldn't see him anymore and those stupid idiots were laughing."

"I'll get dry clothes." Astrid muttered through gritted teeth. _If she caught hold of those bullies…_

Ingrid stormed in moments later.

"Who do I need to kill?!" She raged, her dagger in hand. Hiccup was pretty sure he had hidden that from her, but his worry for Alastor outweighed his tempermental daughter wielding her most trusted weapon. "Al!" She may try to kill her little brother sometimes- as all big sisters do- but she would do anything for him. "I'LL GET THEM!"

"Ingrid, no!" Hiccup lunged forward and grabbed her by the arm. For an eleven year old, she was strong and highly stubborn- all from her mother's side. "No!" Hiccup repeated sternly, holding her firmly by the shoulders and looking her square in the eye.

"But, Dad-!"

"I know, I'm not keen on them either. But I'll sort this."

"You said that last time and now look!" Ingrid gestured angrily at her comatose brother with her blade. "If you don't sort them out, I sure as Valhalla will!" And with that, she flounced out, hitting the wall and stomping her feet all the way down the stairs.

"She's so your daughter."

"That's a good thing." Astrid countered, snapping her fingers next to Alastor's ear. He stirred feebly. "Al?" She called softly. The youngster mumbled incoherently. Hiccup noticed Astrid had successfully got him into dry clothes and wrapped up in several blankets to warm him back up. She may doubt herself, but she was a highly efficient mother. "But she's right." She continued. "If you don't sort those brats out this time round, I'm going over there with my axe _and_ Ingrid." Hiccup sighed, passing a hand through his sopping wet hair tiresomely.

* * *

Ingrid _completely_ blanked her father's orders- nothing new- but she couldn't shake her little sister. Aloe Helga-Vera was a sweetheart, bubbly and most often chatty, very giggly. Normally she could shake Ingrid from one of her tempers, but not today. Today was the last straw.

"I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, ARNE!" Ingrid yelled, smacking the butt of her knife on the door to the Legosons' door. "ARNE!" She kicked the door and then whacked it again. "OPEN THIS DOOR, YOU COWARD!" Arne and his two friends were a few months older than her- they only picked on Alastor as he wouldn't stand up for himself in fear of hurting others.

Ingrid didn't have that problem. "YOU HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO OPEN THIS DOOR OR YOU'LL BE PICKING SPLINTERS FROM YOUR EYES FOR A MONTH!" The door opened then, Arne's stout-legged mother frowning at her.

"What do you want?" Ingrid belatedly concealed her knife behind her back and tried for a sweet smile.

"I just want to talk to Arne."

"He's not here." She answered curtly.

"Yeah?" Ingrid barged past, Aloe squeaking a protest behind her; _It's rude to enter someone's house uninvited! Ingrid, wait!_

Ingrid rushed up the stairs two at a time and- what did she find?- Arne, sitting on his bed. "Now who's hiding behind their mother?" She lifted her knife.

"What's this?" Arne sneered. "A toothpick? Dearie me, I am in trouble!"

"YOU HAD BETTER FLIPPING BELIEVE IT!" She raged. "YOU NEARLY KILLED MY BROTHER!"

"Ingrid, no!" Aloe tried to get hold of her sister's arm, but there was no stopping a raging hurricane. She lunged forward. Arne yelped and scampered from his bed, darting to the other side of his room. " _Ingrid_!"

"You're _crazy_!" Arne wailed, ducking around her as she slashed at his head.

"WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CLUE?!" She snatched at his shirt, catching him in a vice-like grip. "YOU HURT MY BROTHER, I HURT YOU!" Ingrid gave him a very violent shake, silently elated when his usually red face paled. "So you're not _completely_ clueless…" She snarled, twisting the point of her knife into his neck, drawing a small bead of blood.

"Ingrid." She turned her head, glaring at her father with angry blue eyes. He stood calmly in the doorway, her vision of him obscured by a tangle of her wild dark brown hair. Aloe peered from behind his mismatched legs, smiling as if everything was OK. Her blue-green eyes twinkled happily and she curled a strand of blonde hair around her finger. "Put the knife down." Hiccup ordered.

"In a minute." Ingrid turned back to Arne, digging the knife in a little deeper.

"Ingrid _._ " He repeated, his tone firmer.

"He nearly _killed_ Al." She argued, talking slowly like he was stupid. "You want me to just _let him go_?"

"Yes. I think he understands now, don't you, _Arne_?" Hiccup's tone held a trace of the anger he had mastered keeping under wraps, implying that if Arne- or any of his little cronies- did anything again, he wouldn't hold Ingrid- or Astrid, for that matter- back. " _Arne_?" He repeated.

"Y-yessir."

"Good." He stared Ingrid out. She reluctantly lowered her knife. "We're leaving." He told her.

"One last thing." Arne often claimed girls couldn't hit as hard as boys, but that nice big bruise on his face would last quite a while. The smack of the hit and the force behind it floored him.

" _Ingrid_."

"Alright, alright." She sheathed her knife, glowering down at Arne. "If you try anything like that again, I _swear_ I will end you. _Understand_?" He managed to nod weakly, his hand on his injured jaw. Blood spilled over his bottom lip, dripping stoically onto the floor.

"You can't solve everything with violence." Hiccup began on the way back to the Haddock residence.

"I beg to differ." Ingrid replied coolly. Her father sighed. "And don't act like you're annoyed, Dad. You're secretly glad I whopped him one."

"Am I now?"

"Yes, because you'd be lecturing right now if you wasn't." Hiccup massaged his forehead, evading an on-coming or already present headache. And he thought being the _chief_ was difficult- try raising Ingrid.

"Daddy?" Aloe skipped alongside them, holding Hiccup's hand and happily oblivious to their conversation. "Can we go and get those nice flowers for Mummy again?"

"In a bit," he promised, "we've got to get that troublesome sister of yours home first."

"How's Al?" Ingrid asked.

"With luck, he'll come around in the next few days." Hiccup gave her a lopsided smile. "I doubt I could say the same about Arne's face though."

"He _so_ had that coming, Dad, don't deny it." He said nothing, but his smile remained.

* * *

 **I've added a sentence or two, but it's pretty much the same. Thoughts? I've kept the drama for the first chapter because I wanted to :P**


	2. Chapter 2

Stormfly liked to sleep downstairs by the fire, preening before settling down for the night. Toothless liked to nest upstairs on his rock bed, keeping an eye on his rider's hatchlings. Hiccup and his mate slept downstairs in a smaller room at the back of the house, where they had their own small fire in the winter. Sometimes, one of the hatchlings, the smallest one, would quietly pad over to Toothless. He would let her settle amongst his front legs with her blanket and she would sleep there, tucked under his chin. Other times, she would lie awake for a while and talk to him quietly, scratching him behind the ear.

Toothless and Stormfly liked this little hatchling more than the other two- when it was her turn to feed them, she would give them extra. She always conjured up those shiny dots which relentlessly evaded Toothless and a solid lake angled for Stormfly to preen some more. She was a lovely little hatchling, but a bit strange too. She had a habit of tipping herself upside down and talking backwards. Hiccup and Astrid seemed to find this relatively normal, but it befuddled the two dragons to no end.

Then, one night, with the hatchlings all in bed- one of them didn't seem to stop sleeping for the last few days- Toothless meandered downstairs to find Hiccup lying on his back on the floor, his legs crossed on the wall. He pawed at his rider and mewled curiously, snuffling his hair. Hiccup laughed and petted Toothless's nose.

"I'm OK, bud. Just very comfortable." Toothless now knew why the smallest hatchling was so strange- she got it from Hiccup.

After checking his rider hadn't lost another leg, Toothless bounced over to the sleeping Stormfly and roused her to play. He had sat with the second hatchling all day and he felt ready to run rampant around the village, playing Tug with a large stick.

Hiccup watched the two dragons bumble up, everything much more interesting reversed. He couldn't remember actually lying down on the floor and putting his feet on the wall, but it was actually surprisingly comfortable and helped him think.

The only problem with this was Astrid trying to step on him and crush his ribs.

"What are you doing _now_?" She exasperated, rolling her eyes and stepping over him.

"Lying on the floor."

"Yes, but _why_?"

"Why not?"

"There are perfectly good chairs over there." She waved vaguely in the direction of the table, its chairs standing empty and miserable.

"Nah." Hiccup decided, rolling onto his front and sitting up on his heels. "How's Al?"

"He's stopped shivering now and has some colour back. Had to take a blanket off because he was getting too warm."

"He'll be fine." Hiccup assured, noting the worry in her tone.

"Of course he will be- he doesn't have much choice."

"He has a very stubborn mother."

"And an even more stubborn father."

"No-one is more stubborn than you. Except my dad. He is _stubborn_." Astrid nodded in agreement, draping washing on a line before the fire to dry. Hiccup had set that up- close enough to dry, but never close enough to start a fire. "Are you OK?"

"Yes. Why wouldn't I be?" Hiccup pushed himself up and wandered over, catching her by the wrist to stop her rushing off to do whatever Astrid had to do now. "Hiccup, I'm busy. I've-" He silenced her with a kiss.

"I'll make you dinner. You sit down and _relax_. See, great word. _Relax_." She made to protest, but the temptation was there. She had barely sat down for more than five minutes today- _relax_ was indeed a great word.

* * *

Hiccup blamed his father.

Carving wooden ducks took time, but it was highly therapeutic. He had tried to get Astrid to do it as well, but she had given him a funny look and stuck to her own calming method- smashing things.

Toothless and Stormfly were still out and about somewhere, probably terrorising wild Terrible Terrors. That was another one of their games, but it left Alastor on his own. Valka had insisted someone stayed with him at all times, just in case. Astrid was still asleep and the girls were outside playing Hide and If-I-find-you-you're-dead. Ingrid's version, _completely_ her own idea. Astrid had _nothing_ to do with it whatsoever; she was _far_ too nice for that.

Sighing, Hiccup finished the beak and examined the duck from all angles. Stoick would be proud. Or jealous. Hiccup's ducks often got eyes, a little detail Stoick never bothered with, but it turned his son's ducks into better quality ones.

"D-Dad?"

"Afternoon, Sleepy-head." Alastor stared at him blearily. "How are you feeling?" His son just groaned in response and twisted, getting comfortable again. "Oy." Hiccup nudged him with his good foot. "No going to sleep, we need to talk." Alastor opened his eyes again, wondering why his father had chosen to sit at the end of his bed and then concluding that it was to make sure Alastor didn't avoid him. He was stubborn like that. "You're not in trouble, don't worry."

"O-O-O-K-K… O- _K_." Hiccup gave him a funny look and sat up straighter.

"What do you remember?"

"A-Ar-Arne a-a-n-and h-h-is-his…" Alastor stopped again, putting his hands to his throat and grimacing.

"Does your throat hurt?" The child shook his head, looking up at his father, worry deep in his identical eyes. "No, it's OK." Hiccup set aside the duck and shifted to the other end of the bed, putting his arm around his son. "Probably the final screw falling loose." He smiled, poking Alastor gently in the forehead. "But you remember what happened right?" Alastor nodded. "No amnesia, that's good."

"B-b-bu-ut…"

"Yeah, I'm not sure what to do about that. ASTRID!" Alastor startled and Hiccup laughed. "Sorry." He smiled as his wife appeared in the doorway.

"Hiccup, I need to go. I've got a class in five minutes." Her eyes slid to Alastor and her impatience disappeared. "Al!" She surged forward and crushed her son in a relieved hug. And then she pushed him away. "Bad Al! You're as bad as your father, making me worry like that! It is _not_ a family thing to be constantly in mortal danger!"

"Says you."

"Says _you_ , Mr. One-Leg."

"It's Mr. One-and-a-half-Legs to you, _madam_." She made to retort, but he waved it away. "Al can't talk properly."

"What?" Alastor pulled the covers up over his mouth and remained silent, trying not to waver under his mother's gaze. "Al, what's going on?" She glared at her husband. "He _can_ talk, right?"

"Yeah, but he… stammers. A lot."

"Oh, _great_. Those little gits-"

"Little ears!" Hiccup reprimanded playfully, putting his hands over his son's ears. Astrid glowered at him.

"They made him even more _nervous_ , Hiccup. And that stammer's not going to help!"

"I'm sure it'll go. He just needs to get his bearings, that's all." She opened her mouth to say something, but Hiccup cut across; "You've got a class now, haven't you?"

"Al's more important!"

"I know. I'll take him to the 'rentals though, see what they say."

"Just… don't let those _brats_ ," Hiccup gave a content nod and lowered his hands, "anywhere near him or I'm getting my axe."

"Yes milady." She nodded once and flounced from the room. "When you get married, make sure your wife doesn't try to kill you _too_ much, OK?" Alastor flushed red.

"M-m-marr-rried?"

"Yeah. It's nice, but it's dangerous. Do you like my ducks?" He pointed at the bedside cabinet. "Made them myself." He said proudly. There were five ducks, getting gradually smaller. "See, there's the Daddy Duck, the Mummy Duck and then the three baby ducks." Alastor glanced at his father and then back at the crafts, before leaning forward and swapping the mother and father ducks around. "Oy!" Hiccup retaliated by grabbing the blankets and bundling his small son up in them. "Now you're prisoner."

"Dad!"

"Oh, Aloe Aloe."

"Funny." It was always her father's way of greeting her when he was in a good mood- which was often. Apparently _hello_ sounded like _Aloe_. "Is that Al?"

"No."

"You're kidnapping my brother!"

"It's not kidnapping! I'm his dad!"

"You're taking him somewhere against his will! That's _kidnapping_."

"You are _way_ too smart for a seven year old." Hiccup sighed dramatically. "I can only blame myself."

"Fathead." Ingrid intervened, leaning against the door frame.

"What, is it pick-on-Hiccup day or something?"

"That's _every_ day, Dad."

"Oh yeah." He scooped the Al-bundle up in his arms. "Excuse me, ladies."

"Where are you taking him?"

"I'm going to drown him again." Alastor twisted and Hiccup nearly dropped him. "That was sarcasm! We're going to see the elderly people."

"I'm saying you called them old!" Aloe sprinted from the room, Ingrid stepping aside to let her out and then blocking her father's way.

"Ingrid!"

"Dad!"

* * *

"Your favourite son is here!" Hiccup called upon entering his parents' residence.

"You're our _only_ son!" Stoick replied heartily. "That doesn't count!"

"It does too." He set Alastor- still bundled up- on the table. Stoick looked at him questioningly and then chuckled when his grandson materialised. "I kidnapped him." Hiccup said proudly.

"And who would be running the village?"

"Uh, no-one right this second. Where's Mum?"

"Talking to Aloe. Elderly people, eh?"

"Elderly as in, you know, _wise_." Hiccup raised his hands and mocked a half-bow. "I seek your guidance, oh wise father." Stoick bounced an apple off his son's head and then looked at Alastor.

"Good to see you awake, m'boy."

"I'm your boy."

"You're my highly annoying son, there is a difference." Stoick regarded the pair of them. "Is everything OK? Haven't lost a leg, have you?" He asked, eyeing Alastor suspiciously. Alastor shook his head and his grandfather relaxed.

"Is _everyone_ coming up with amputee jokes today?" Hiccup complained childishly. Stoick ignored him, studying Alastor intently. Alastor said nothing, not even when his grandmother arrived with his sister in tow.

"Hello, Daddy!"

"You're getting me in trouble, Aloe!"

"Of course!" She beamed and giggled, bouncing forward to hug her father's leg. Hiccup sat her on the table next to Alastor and she hugged him too. "Hello, Al!" Alastor returned her hug feebly and she gave him a funny look. "Why aren't you talking?"

"I was just thinking that myself." Valka agreed, peering curiously at her grandson. "Is everything alright?" Alastor looked at his father for guidance, seeing only kindness and a silent encouragement. Hiccup wasn't going to put him on the spot; he was letting him explain things in his own time.

Aloe pinched her brother's cheeks, startling him back to reality. He often drifted away with his thoughts and it was her job to bring him back. He pinched her nose lightly in reply and then stuck his thumb between his fingers- _got your nose_ , his eyes seemed to tease.

"Hiccup." Stoick frowned at his son. "What's going on?"

"Can I tell them?" Alastor hesitated before nodding. Hiccup covered Aloe's ears and explained quietly about his son's stammer. "He won't be stuck with that, will he? I mean, I don't mind it, but he has enough on his plate."

"I'm sure it'll go. It's often a nervous reaction." Valka told them, smiling reassuringly at Alastor. "You just need a… little confidence boost, that's all. Don't try to hide it or you'll worry more. And don't stress about it either, that won't help."

"Dad!" Hiccup tilted his head to the side curiously. "Dad, you idiot! Where are you?"

"Yeah, that's Ingrid." He ruffled Aloe's hair with both hands to annoy her and then, less evilly, messed up Alastor's hair. "Back in a bit." He promised, hearing his eldest daughter calling him again. "Are you calling your father an idiot?"

"No, don't be stupid. I'm calling my chief an idiot."

"Ah, so you _do_ learn." Ingrid rolled her eyes and gave him a stony faced look. "What's the matter?"

"You're wanted on some of the yak farms. And Bucket and Mulch are slapping each other."

"Ugh, _again_?" She nodded, drawing a bit of paper from her pocket. "What else?" Hiccup moved to read over her shoulder- the twins had gone missing (which was never good); Snotlout wasn't doing anything he should be, i.e. _working_. Gobber was looking for an assistant for his dragon-dentist business and some of the vegetable farmers were having problems with wild dragons. "And Al had to wake up today of all days." Ingrid grinned slyly.

"Have fun."


	3. Chapter 3

"Mummy, Mummy! Daddy's back!" Aloe hopped from one foot to the other excitedly, giggling. "He's back!"

"Good. Now I can kill him." Her daughter's smile faltered.

"Why?"

"Because he's an idiot. Why else?" Astrid waved her youngest out just as Toothless landed. His rider dismounted and removed his helmet, shaking his hair into the usual messy state. Hiccup beamed at them, pulling his prize from behind his back.

"You found her!" Aloe squealed, surging forward and crushing her childhood toy in her thin arms. It was- _meant to be_ \- a Deadly Nadder, courtesy of Valka. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Hiccup chuckled and ruffled her hair.

"Anything for you."

"Can I have a dragon?"

"Ah… not just yet."

"What about a small dragon? Like a Terror?" Hiccup knelt, smiling.

"How about you start with the ones that don't breathe fire, huh?" He waggled the toy before her and kissed her forehead. "Baby steps, Aloe, baby steps."

"I do hope that was worth the week away." Astrid had her arms folded, her hip out to the side with _that look_ \- Hiccup was in dead-meat-trouble without a doubt.

"Um… wh-what did I miss?" She gave a single, cold and very sarcastic laugh, retrieving a scroll from her belt.

"I'm glad you asked!" And she read from her list:

 _Arne and co had opened all the sheep pens- it had taken eight hours or more for all, but one sheep to be rounded up_

 _Snotlout's twin boys went on a major yak tipping spree_

 _Fire in the Great Hall_

 _Farms had been raided_

 _The twins had organised a Hideous Zippleback contest, leading to the near total demolition of the arena_

 _Trader Johan had had some supplies stolen_

 _Three fishing boats and a dozen nets had been broken beyond repair_

 _Arne and co were terrorising the elders and the younger kids_

 _Gothi was having trouble with leaks, no matter how many Gobber fixed_

 _Two mutinies had been narrowly avoided due to the fact that Hiccup hadn't left someone proper in charge_

"Wait, what? I swear I left Dad in charge."

"Nope." Astrid smacked the list in his hand. "Poor Alastor got the brunt of it all!"

"But-"

"He's old enough to think for himself now, _apparently_ ," her tone informed Hiccup she had had quite a few disputes with some over this, "and as your only son, he automatically becomes stand-in chief. Which, may I add, Ingrid just _loved_."

"Dare I ask what she's done now?"

"She thinks because she's the oldest, that she should be chief. And I completely agree with her." Hiccup waved Aloe back inside, closing the door quietly. Astrid's temper was simmering just below the surface and it was ideal if their youngest wasn't around when she exploded. "Al's stammer has only gotten worse- enough so, he's refusing to talk. I'm not shooting him down, Hiccup, but he hasn't any confidence whatsoever." That was true.

Astrid was watching him expectantly, hands on her hips.

"Alright, alright. I'll see what I can do. This whole chief thing though…" He trailed off, scanning the list of problems. "I don't know. I always thought it was a father-to-son thing. Girls become the Elder, don't they?"

"Can you really imagine _Ingrid_ being so _calm_ and _collected_ all the time? Not to mention _silent_."

"Fair point." He sighed, tucking the list in his belt. "Let's get you sorted first though." Astrid looked befuddled, her shoulders relaxing a fraction in surprise. Hiccup put his arm about her waist, kissing her cheek. "I'm sorry I left for so long, milady." Astrid tried to maintain her glare, but warmth reddened her cheeks and Hiccup smiled victoriously. "Come on; you need some rest and relaxation."

* * *

Hiccup left an hour later, Aloe at his heels. Astrid was sleeping, thoroughly relaxed from the master massage he had provided. He may be annoying, but Hiccup was an expert in creating restful and relaxing atmospheres.

"Where are the other two?" He asked his daughter, examining the list again.

"Probably helping to clean up the arena. Mummy said I couldn't though; I'm too little." Aloe didn't seem to mind this, however, making her beloved toy fly about in a bobbing circle.

"Yeah, I take full responsibility for your shortness." Aloe looked up at him. "Hey, I'm a hiccup, remember? Short and runty is in the genes. Toothless!" His dragon bounded over instantly, snuffling at the littlest hatchling interestedly.

Hiccup lifted and sat his daughter on the saddle and then sat behind her. "To the arena, bud." Toothless crooned, spreading his wings. Aloe stuffed her toy under her shirt and held on with both hands as the Night Fury bolted into the sky. Hiccup laughed, keeping a firm hold on his daughter. She hated the take-off.

The arena was considerably cleaner than it had been after the twins were finished with it, but Hiccup felt like he was walking into a warzone. Many of the young adults and some of the older Vikings were picking up debris and scrubbing away dirt and dust and painting over scorch marks too stubborn to be washed away. Some were scaling the chains overhead to remove the old ones and put in newer ones.

"Dad! You're back!" Ingrid dropped from her ladder, despite being two rungs from the top. She and her brother, who was steadying the ladder, hurried over to greet him. "I need to talk to you." Ingrid announced.

"OK, but if it's the chief thing, we'll talk about that later."

"Oh, _fine_." Hiccup tried not to look too surprised- Ingrid rarely agreed so easily.

"You OK, bud?" He asked his son, messing his hair up. Alastor nodded, smiling timidly. "Sorry for all this," Hiccup motioned at the arena, "I thought I had left Dad in charge." His son just nodded again, his eyes darting about anxiously.

"Chief!"

"Yes? Oh, hello Bjorn!"

"Hello sir!"

"Call me Hiccup, how many more times?" Hiccup chuckled. "How are things here?"

"Under control, Hiccup sir. The twins are nowhere to be found though." Hiccup checked his list, tilting it towards Bjorn. Over the past few years, Bjorn Junior had become one of Hiccup's most trusted, but youngest advisor.

"Look!" Aloe beamed, holding up her Nadder toy while the grown-ups talked. "Daddy found it for me!" Alastor gave her a double thumbs-up while Ingrid bemusedly cast her eyes to the heavens. "Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"Yeah, in a minute." Ingrid glanced around, pulling a face. "I'm surprised Mum didn't kill Dad." Alastor nodded in agreement.

"Daddy sweet-talked his way out. He's, um… very clever like that. So he says anyway."

"I can hear you, you know!" Aloe giggled and put a finger to her lips, her eyes sparkling with cheeky innocence towards her father. Hiccup rolled his eyes and returned to his conversation. "Where are Arne and his little buddies?"

"They should be here. We roped in most of the youngsters to help out and they were first on our list. You know, to keep them out of trouble." Hiccup nodded approvingly and Bjorn grinned, delighted. He called over one of the pre-teens and sent him out to look for the required trio.

It took a few minutes for them to turn up, looking sheepish when they did.

"Hello." Hiccup smiled, almost looking like the usual warm and friendly chief, except for his eyes. "A little birdy told me you three have had an interesting week. Care to explain?" They shared wary looks and then shook their heads. "Well, in that case, I'll explain for you. Not only do you severely annoy me by trying to _kill_ my son, but you thought it would be a good idea to put our food supplies at risk with winter just around the corner. _And_ you also thought it would be fun to cause a number of villagers an unfair bit of trouble." He frowned at them, the green in his eyes suddenly icy. "Correct me if I'm wrong." He dared. They didn't. "And you wouldn't know anything about broken boats, torn nets or leaking roofs, would you?" Another no, rather hasty. "For what you've done, nearly _killing my son_ included…" Hiccup pretended to consider it, his eyes scanning the mayhem about him. "Three months cleaning the stalls for _all_ animals- dragons too. Four months after that working for Gobber and, trust me, that _won't_ be easy." His eyes locked with Alastor's and a devilish gleam ignited in the emerald depths. "And for attempting to drown Al… a year as his- no, he's too nice." Hiccup rubbed his jaw in contemplation, sensing their hushed protest and fear of his chiefly-ness. "A year as Ingrid's personal servants."

"You can't do that!" Arne blurted out.

"And a month for all of you working on the farms for contradicting me even more." Hiccup concluded. "If I so much as hear you _breathe_ anywhere you're not supposed to be…" He shook his head, letting the threat hang in the air. They paled. "Ingrid."

"Dad?"

"In three months, you'll have these three at your command."

"Yeah…?" Hiccup smirked.

"They're all yours. Have fun." Hiccup motioned to Aloe and left. Ingrid grinned evilly.

"They won't even last a week." She gleefully told her brother. The three boys looked sickly, almost grey.

* * *

At dinner that evening, Ingrid recounted her father's set punishments for Arne, Rolf and Snorre. Astrid tutted disapprovingly.

"That's a bit _easy_ , don't you think?"

"Oh. I thought I did OK."

"I _hate_ those boys. It's like hell itself spat them out!" She sighed, stabbing her lamb with a little extra force. "You make sure you run them ragged, Ingrid." Hiccup smiled to himself. Astrid, his wife- so heartless.

"Can we talk about the chief thing now?" Ingrid demanded. Hiccup suddenly remembered he had promised to do so. He motioned for her to begin the debate. "I personally think I'd make a better chief than Al. No offense." She added, holding her hands up. Her little brother nodded once, more focused on pushing his food about his plate. "And I'm the chief's firstborn! Why can't a girl be chief?"

"It's not like I wrote the rules, Ingrid." Hiccup pointed out.

"But you're the _chief_. Couldn't you change them?"

"I don't know."

"You should! You know, as chief…"

"Al? What do you think?" Alastor didn't respond immediately, encouraging Aloe to pinch his arm. "Chief?" Hiccup implored. Alastor started chewing his lip. "Not right this second, don't worry," Hiccup smiled reassuringly, "don't panic. But when you're older and I've retired." Astrid cleared her throat pointedly. "When _we've_ retired then." Alastor shook his head. "What do you want to do?"

"S-s-st-stu-stud-dy-study d-dr-dr-dra-drag-ons." Hiccup smiled approvingly.

"I want to be a baker!" Aloe announced, shooting to her feet on her chair and waving her hand in the air. "Or maybe something to do with flowers. I like flowers!" She giggled and sat down, happily returning to her food without a care in the world.

"Noted." Hiccup shook his head at his daughter, smiling. He threw Stormfly the overcooked bit of his lamb, pretty sure Astrid was feeding Toothless under the table. "But, Ingrid, you're a bit violent."

"So?"

"A bit?" Astrid marvelled simultaneously. "She takes after me! _A bit_ is an insult!"

"I'm sorry!" Hiccup threw his arms over his head. "Please don't chop me!"

"Don't tempt me!" Astrid warned, playing along.

"I'm violent, so _what_?"

"You'll declare war or something for the fun of it."

"Will not! I'll just upgrade the Thawfest events to something a bit more… bloody…"

"See? _Violent_." Ingrid nodded proudly. "I'll have to talk to Dad about this. I can't make any promises though, these are ancient laws. There has never, as far as I know, being a female chief of Berk." He sighed. "Oh, you lot are giving me a headache."

"I'm not!" Aloe laughed. "I'm not giving anyone a headache, because I'm lovely! Right Daddy? Right Mummy?" Astrid and Hiccup shared amused glances.

"Yes, Aloe."

* * *

 **You're getting two chapters for this today because I am working this evening. After this one, however, there are no more from the original** _ **Second Crisis**_ **, it shall all be a mystery to you! Ooh, I'm going to have so much fun writing this! :D**


	4. Chapter 4

"Welcome to dragon training! Oh gods, I sound like Gobber." Hiccup cleared his throat. "Some of you probably already know the basics, some of you may even have your dragons. For now, though, we're going to go over all the basics, just to see what you know and such. Any questions before we start?" Hiccup grimaced slightly. "Arne?" He sighed.

"Does Ingrid get special treatment?"

"No." Arne again.

"Why are they here?" He pointed to Alastor and Aloe. "They're babies." Aloe looked at Arne.

"I am Daddy's assistant. So I can tell you what to do. Now shush. Your voice is annoying."

"Wow. Normally Aloe likes everyone. Attagirl." Hiccup rested his hand briefly on her head. "OK, hands up if you have your own dragon." About half the class put their hands up. Ingrid wasn't one of them. Hiccup frowned.

"Um, excuse you, Dad. It's your own fault. I told you I wanted to go to the Edge, but _noooo_."

"I was busy."

"You're always busy."

"I'm the chief."

"And I'm your daughter."

"And you're a pain. Let's go over the dragons, let's see what you all know." Alastor handed his father a stack of drawings, all the types of dragons they had ever found. He silently named every single one of them while most of the class could only name the common ones and a Night Fury. Ingrid did the best, naming at least two-thirds of the winged reptiles. "I see I've taught you well." Hiccup nodded. "Bud, come here." Toothless was resting in the sunlight, dozing peacefully. Upon the summons, he turned away, flicking his tail before his face. Hiccup sighed. "Aloe, get him." Aloe beamed and scurried forward, jumping on and she clung to him, giggling. "Can I have my daughter please?" Toothless grumbled and padded over, despositing Aloe into her father's arms. "Stay." Hiccup gestured and Toothless sat, licking his claws. "Right. How do you get something from a dragon he's not supposed to have?"

"Yell at it." Arne shrugged. Hiccup reached into his basket of food, throwing Toothless a loaf of bread.

"Alastor, please show them how it's done." Alastor did, returning the bread to his dad. Toothless wound under Alastor's arm, wanting attention now he was no longer being fed.

The lesson went on for another hour and a half. The Haddock spawn did extremely well, Hiccup was very proud of them. He had indeed taught them all very well. Arne and his two friends knew literally nothing. Hiccup saw Alastor taking great delight in being able to do something better than them. Aloe spent most of the lesson playing with Toothless, trying to catch his tail and pretending to be Hiccup. "Next lesson, bring your dragons." Hiccup instructed before dismissing them. "Well done, you three. I might make you all my assistants."

"That's special treatment." Ingrid pointed out. "How long until I can bully Arne, Snorre and... whatever the other one's called?"

"Two weeks."

"Yes." Ingrid punched the air excitedly. "Don't worry, Al, I'll break them for you." Alastor smiled weakly. "No-one picks on my brother except me." Alastor nodded. Ingrid frowned. "Talk." He shook his head. "Don't let them win, bro. Just talk. I don't care if it takes a year to finish your sentence, it'll help you get better." Again he shook his head. Ingrid sighed. "There's always the option of cutting your tongue out completely." Aloe gasped, horrified. Hiccup pinched his eldest's arm.

"Behave." He warned, ignoring her retaliation pinch. "Your mother wanted you after this class. Take Aloe with you, I need to talk to Al."

"I'm always the baby-sitter."

"Up!" Aloe requested immediately. Ingrid lifted her and sat her on her shoulders. "Go, go, go!" The older sister rolled her eyes, gripped the child's ankles and set off at a steady jog. Aloe squealed delightedly.

"Mad. The pair of them." Alastor hunched his shoulders. Hiccup smiled. "I'll get you to talk. Don't be... worried about it, Al. I've known plenty of people to get stammers and stutters. I did for a while too. It'll go, just give yourself some time. And confidence. That works too. I know!" Hiccup snapped his fingers, grinning. "You need your own dragon! That'll work wonders, you watch! Is there any particular dragon you'd want?"

"I-I-In-Ing-Ingr-ri-d-rid w-wa-wan-want-ted a-a-a d-dr-dra-g-g-gon f-f-fir-first."

"I was going to take her for her birthday, so ssh." Hiccup put a finger to his lips. Alastor nodded, smiling. Ingrid would love that. "As for you, I got you talking. Told you I would."

"B-b-be-si-besid-besides t-th-the p-p-p-poi-point."

"OK, I'm going to list of dragon names. Anything takes your fancy, just... wave." Hiccup flailed his hands. Alastor copied. "I hadn't even started. Right, Gronckle, Nightmare, Nadder, Thunderdrum-" Hiccup rattled off all the dragons he could think of. Alastor didn't pick any. "Want me to go over them again?"

"N-n-no."

"Just going to let fate have her way then?"

"M-ma-may-mayb-be."

"I suppose that works too. Chin up, kiddo. You'll get your dragon and then you'll be just like me. Isn't that exciting?" Alastor hummed. "I'm going to take that as a great deal of enthusiasm." Hiccup looked to the sky, Toothless sneaking under his arm. The chief absent-mindedly patted the dragon's head, humming thoughtfully. "Want to practise flying Toothless?"

"R-r-r-re-really?" Alastor brightened. Ingrid was learning to ride the Night Fury- she was trying to bribe Hiccup into letting Toothless go so she could have him- but Alastor had figured he'd have to be older before he could learn. He nodded excitedly. Hiccup reached for the stirrup that controlled the dragon's artificial tail. He had made a new version of it. When his left foot was to connect to it, it was how it had always been, something for metal to click on. But if you turned, unrolled and clipped it in place, you had a control for people with two feet. Hiccup stepped back and bowed his head. Alastor bounced into the saddle, buckling up. His father sat behind him.

"Toothless, easy now. We've a first time flyer here." Toothless snorted and shook his head, casting an amused glance their way. He shuffled, spreading his wings. Alastor gripped the saddle tightly, grinning from ear to ear. "Not too tightly, Toothless likes to have a bit of free reign. That means you need to watch out for his tricks. Random dives and that." Alastor nodded. "Just pull a bit when you want him to fly. Not too much though. This is one fussy dragon, a drama queen if you will." Alastor tugged on the saddle. Toothless jumped into the sky, Alastor tumbling back against his dad. Hiccup laughed. "Change the tail so he can level out!" Alastor looked down at his left foot, pushing down. Toothless immediately crashed into a line of trees, leaves and twigs stuck in their hair. "Other way!"

"S-s-s-sorry!"

"No, it's OK! Did better than Ingrid did, I'll give you that. She crashed into a cliff-face. Still got the bruises." Toothless muttered in agreement, spitting foliage out. Alastor inspected his foot again and looked back at the tail to see what movement did what. "Got it?" Hiccup asked after a few minutes.

"I-I-I t-th-thi-think s-s-so."

"Go for it."

"Wh-what i-if I-I-I m-m-me-mess u-up?"

"I'm right here." Hiccup smiled. Alastor returned it feebly. He tested the tail again and leant left, pulling on the handles. Toothless tilted to the left, following the young rider's commands, right, left, up, dip down a little and then back up, straight into the clouds.

"C-c-can't se-see!"

"Toothless knows where he's going." Toothless roared. Alastor saw the dragon's ears adjust and he bowed his head. "He wants to go down. Ease forward with your foot. You're picking this up really quickly, I'm jealous. Took me _weeks_ to get this dragon flying in a straight line, let alone ups, downs and turns." Alastor grinned to himself. "Then again, you _have_ got Hofferson blood in you. That might be why... Oh, look! Company! Hello, milady!"

"Hello." Astrid smiled at the pair. Aloe sat in front of her, Ingrid behind.

"Hey!" Ingrid protested. "You said I could learn before Alastor."

"And you did. You can both learn at the same time, you're just a little more experienced than Al, that's all."

"When can I fly Toothless?" Aloe questioned excitedly, bouncing in her seat. Astrid had to keep a firm hold on her.

"When you're not so short." Ingrid hissed around their mother.

"Ingrid! She's six!"

"And? I wasn't that short at six years old."

"No, you were shorter." Hiccup smirked. Toothless cooed to Stormfly, who instantly rolled over and tipped Ingrid off. "Toothless!"

"I'LL KILL YOU!" Ingrid's yells grew fainter and, instead of waving her arms wildly, she folded them across her chest and glared up at them. Her hair flapped about her face, but that didn' stop her. She would death stare them until death stared her in the face.

"Take Aloe, I'll get her." Stormfly hovered next to Toothless. Aloe scrambled over their outstretched wings and Stormfly dived, catching Ingrid neatly in her claws. The eldest Haddock child swung her legs and was flipped up onto the Nadder's back. "Oh, this is so much fun." Astrid said upon her return. "Woebetide any dragons you lot get, I already feel sorry for them."

* * *

 **Just a bit of family bonding for today, I have to dig up some other chapters that I wrote :D**


	5. Chapter 5

Ingrid was loving this. She had Arne and his two stupid mates cleaning her own personal armoury, making sure they were all sharp, steady and shiny, so shiny, her enemies could see the terror in their own eyes before she cut them down. Then she had them clean the Haddock residence from top to bottom, had them clear fields for planting next spring, harvested the other crops and store them, sent them fishing, foraging, clean the dragon stalls, polish everything in the village's armoury, helping farmers bring in their livestock, muck out the animal stalls and put hay down, restock the dragon feeding stations and help Gobber in the blisteringly hot forge. And that was the first week alone. She had them up before dawn and dismissed them well after sundown. There were plently of complaints and threats; they soon regretted that, bruised and scraped from work and her take downs.

"You're going to run out of jobs for them." Astrid pointed out.

"Which is where the Thornston twins come in."

"Good girl." Astrid chopped potatoes into chunjs and then mashed them. She looked up as the bullies staggered in, bearing water.

"Go and gather wood for the stock." Ingrid told them. "Any logs, chop them, don't disturb any dragon nests and then to the Great Hall to run messages from the meeting." They glowered. Ingrid drew a knife and started cleaning her nails. Grumbling, they stomped out. "I honestly have never had so much fun."

"She's so your daughter." Valka smiled, walking in. The Haddock Terrors scrambled after her, a small army by themselves. Sneezy, now one of the oldest, bounced up onto his owner's lap and lay there, cooing happily as she petted him. "Any thoughts for your birthday?"

"Plenty." Ingrid grinned. "Can I have a new axe?"

"No, you want a fire-sword." Hiccup entered, Toothless behind him. The younger Terrors- who had kind of adopted Toothless as their father- squealed excitedly and pounced. Toothless had long given up trying to get them off and sat where he was, unimpressed as they used him as an obstacle course. Aloe soon joined the ruckus. Toothless didn't mind this little hatchling, she was nice to him. And she fed him extra fish. Always a good point. "Where's your brother?"

"In his nest."

"It's not- Ingrid, how many more times? It's not his nest!" Astrid laughed, accepting a kiss on the cheek as her husband passed.

"Fine, his fort." Hiccup climbed the stairs. The past few years, the upstairs bedroom had become a bedroom for the children. Hiccup and Astrid slept downstairs in the back room. The dragons slept wherever they were most comfortable. His son was indeed in his fort, nose buried once more in a book. He had strung a large sheet between two adjacent walls, the edge of which fell forward onto the floor, giving him a nice enclosed space. Hiccup had given him a few large cushions and had entrusted the Dragon Chronicles to him. Alastor looked up as his father approached and smiled a greeting.

"Hey, kiddo. You alright?" Alastor nodded. "Mind if I join you?" The boy shifted to one side and Hiccup sat next to him. "I swear you've got these memorised?"

"G-g-g-good r-re-rea-reads."

"Ask Fishlegs to take you to hidey hole three, you'll love it there."

"W-w-wh-what?"

"Hidey hole three. You'll see." Hiccup grinned. "Now, any reccomendations for the your sister's birthday?" Alastor flipped a few pages and held the book out to his father. "Ah. Yeah, I suppose that could work. Suits Ingrid to a tee, that." Hiccup ruffled his hair. Aloe came bounding up the stairs and dived in to join them. "Why, Aloe Aloe."

"Aloe Daddy! Aloe Al!"

"Aha! Got you!" Aloe hunched her small shoulders.

"It has grown on me."

"Awesome."

"When will I get big dragon, Daddy?"

"When you're older."

"But I am older!" Hiccup pulled a face. "Do I have to be old old, like you?"

"I am not that old!"

"Mummy says you a hundred years old. And she's twenty."

"Yeah, that sounds about right."

"You look good for a hundred years old, Daddy."

"I'm not a hundred, Aloe."

"How old are you then?"

"Twenty." Alastor frowned. "Fine, thirty-two. Not old, see? And so is your mother, don't listen to her nonsense."

"Hey!"

"Oh crap. I mean, crud!"

* * *

"Dad, where are we going?"

"The Edge."

"Ooh, am I getting my dragon?"

"No. You're going to help me catalogue any new species." Ingrid rolled her eyes. "Don't be like that. You asked to go to the Edge for your birthday, so I'm taking you to the Edge for your birthday."

"Yes, but I wanted to get a dragon."

"Well, if anything takes your fancy and you can train it, you can keep it. But no Whispering Deaths, those things are nightmares."

"What if I find another Night Fury?"

"Just remember Toothless was the first one. He gets jealous." Toothless crooned in agreement. Ingrid hopped up into the saddle, allowed to fly. Hiccup adjusted the tail controls and sat behind her. "This time, please avoid cliffs. My shoulder is eternally bruised."

"Big baby." Ingrid muttered. Hiccup tugged on her braid. Ingrid ignored him. "Bye, Mum!" She waved. Astrid waved back from the doorway. "We'll be back for dinner!" Hiccup shot his wife a quick 'help' look. She only laughed and ventured inside. Toothless spread his wings. "OK, bud, up!"

"I don't sound like that!"

"Yes you do." Toothless leapt up and they were off. "So, now we've got a few hours to kill, want to tell me this plan?"

"Plan?"

"The one to take down Dagur."

"How do you know about that?"

"Snotlout and Fishlegs were sharing conspicaries."

"And you eavesdropped."

"Of course. It's my business as the future chief to know what's going on in this village."

"Still set on that chief thing then?"

"Yup."

"Talked to Al about that?"

"Oh, he's more than happy to let me take over when the time comes." Hiccup hummed. Ingrid cast a dubious look over her shoulder. "Anyway, this plan? Do tell."

"Top secret."

"Doesn't work like that, Dad."

"Yes it does. You're going too far east." Ingrid adjusted the tail and righted their course. Toothless growled. "What is it, bud?" Toothless sneezed, a plasma blast exploding before them. Hiccup looked down. "Ingrid, pull up." Ingrid searched below them, a large island seemingly blue; covered in blue oleanders. Toothless was redirected into the clouds. His sneezes eventually wore themselves out. "Ingrid, you asked about this plan. I told Fishlegs and Snotlout years ago that it would take years to complete. I just need a little more time."

"So, this plan could happen soon?"

"If I've done my guesswork right, yes."

"Can I know what it is?"

"No."

"Why?" Hiccup didn't answer. "Dad, you can tell me." Still her father said nothing. She glanced back to see he was lost in thought. Ingrid sighed. He got like this sometimes. Best to leave him to it, her mother always said. It may not look like it most of the time, but Hiccup knew what he was doing. "Have faith in your father," Astrid told her, "he's not a total idiot."

Toothless kept her amused, blasting at rocks and trees that she targeted with pinpoint accuracy. He did some fancy aerobatics, splashed through waves and bit playfully at clouds. He scooped up a mouthful of fish at one point, one accidentally flying back and hitting her in the chest. "Toothless!" She reprimanded. He shot a cheeky look back at her. "Horrible dragon."

"He's just playing."

"Welcome back to the land of the living."

"Ha ha ha." Hiccup said sarcastically. He reached around her and adjusted their course once more.

"Will this plan work?"

"Yes."

"Is that all I'm allowed to know?"

"Yes."

"Fine. How much longer?"

"Another hour. Depends if we go faster." Ingrid brightened. "Yes, it's your birthday. Go for it." Ingrid set the tail into a position she hadn't been allowed to before. Toothless swallowed the last of his fish and chortled. Hiccup made sure they were both strapped to the saddle. Ingrid whooped with delight as the Night Fury put on a burst of speed. "YES, THIS IS AMAZING, _YES_! WOO!" Hiccup smiled to himself. "FASTER!"

"Yeah, OK. Go for six." Ingrid did. This was the life. Screaming through the air on the back of a dragon, the wind streaking through her hair, biting at her skin, going at speeds unknown to most men. If she ever found another Night Fury, she would never fly slowly again, she would be a shadow, flitting to and fro, always there in the peripheral vision, too fast, too free, no-one could stop her.

She was still buzzing when they landed at the Edge. Her hair was a tangled mess, like a Terror had made a nest there. She pulled the bands from it and grinned, looking to her father. He simply held his hand out to one side and she sprinted off. Best. Birthday. Ever.

Hiccup catalogued the dragons on his own. Toothless sat on the roof of his hut, keeping an eye and ear out for the birthday girl. There wasn't as much work to do as Hiccup had originally thought, so he took Toothless for a flight around the island. "Do you think she's found anything yet?" Hiccup asked. Toothless grunted. "Don't worry, she'll still love you." Another snort. Hiccup smiled. Toothless roared, listening for a reply. Hiccup didn't hear anything, but his dragon must have, craning his neck to go to the western side. Hiccup switched the tail to the automatic setting, letting his friend have free reign.

They found Ingrid a few minutes later, face-to-face with a clearing apparently. She had her new axe at the ready, a defensive stance in place. Her hair had been yanked back into a bushy ponytail. "Ingrid?" Hiccup called down. "Are you alright?"

"Yes! Stay up there, Dad. Tell me if you can see anything!"

"Please tell me you're not after a Changewing!"

"Sorry, Dad!"

"Oh gods, she's as mad as her mother." Toothless whined, nodding. He hovered in place, eyes fixed worriedly on the eldest hatchling. She was very much like Astrid, except for her dark fur on top of her head. He snarled, hearing twigs snapping and snuffling. He blasted and the Changewing momentarily came into sight. Ingrid raced forward, using the axe to propel herself onto the dragon's back. "Mad, mad, mad... Ingrid! They spit _acid_!"

"Cool, right? Hey! I'm the boss here!"

"You've got to get his trust! Have I taught you nothing?"

"You taught me that Changewings are pack dragons! They follow the strongest!"

"Ingrid, please! Stop acting like your mother! You said it yourself, Changewings are _pack dragons_! If one is in trouble, the rest of the pack will follow!" The red dragon flung its head to the side, striking Ingrid against a tree. "Ingrid! Bud, down!" Toothless dived, chasing the Changewing away with plasma blasts. Hiccup dropped from the saddle and Toothless flew after the rival dragon. "Oh gods, please be OK."

"I'm fine, Dad."

"Bit off more than you could chew, huh?"

"No, I just need a new angle." He helped her up. She regained her axe. Toothless returned, looking pleased with himself. He held something in his mouth. "What's that?"

"Oh no, not again. Put it back where you found it."

"Dad, it's a Stone of Good Fortune."

"No, it's a Changewing egg." Toothless placed it carefully at Ingrid's feet. Ingrid inspected it, crouching. "If you take back a Changewing egg, your mum is going to kill me."

"Why? It's just one egg."

"Think." Hiccup prompted. Ingrid sat, back hurting, and did her best to bring up her dragon knowledge. Her Changewing information was a little sketchy, but she vaguely remembered something about Changewings hunting in packs to locate missing eggs, an incident Berk had already gone through when her parents were not much older than her. "Can we leave it here, please?" Toothless mewled, pawing at the ground. "What?" The Night Fury jumped in circles, grumbling. Hiccup followed him. "Oh."

A dead Changewing mother, surrounded by lifeless Changewing eggs. It seemed the only one that survived was lying in the dirt before Ingrid. "What happened here?" Hiccup started forward to investigate. Toothless bit the back of his tunic and pulled him back. There was a funny smell in the air. The Changewing hadn't long been deceased, so it couldn't be that. Hiccup rubbed at his eyes, piecing together stray thoughts to make sense of this. The smell, he knew the smell, where did he know it from? It bought sickness to his stomach and the years-old scar on his arm seemed to sizzle.

Dagur.

Dagur had done this. He had... he had poisoned the air, the eggs, the dragon. Something he had done had brought this much death.

Hiccup returned to his daughter in a foul mood. "We're leaving."

"What's back there?"

"Nothing good. Looks like you're keeping the egg though."

"But you just said-"

"I know." Hiccup interrupted carefully. "No-one is going to come looking for that egg though." Ingrid tried to peer around him. Toothless immediately blocked her view, spreading his wings. Ingrid sighed.

"Fine." She looked at the little egg in her hands. "Guess I'm getting a Changewing after all. Can I fly back?"

"Yup." Hiccup managed a smile. Ingrid, pleased with her new gift, decided not to question it, in case he changed his mind and made her ditch the egg. Once they were far enough away from the Edge, she tried asking him what had got him so riled up. Hiccup didn't answer, chewing his lip. If Dagur was making a comeback, then his plan wasn't far off from beginning.


	6. Chapter 6

"Please tell me that isn't what I think it is?" Astrid sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"It's a Changewing egg." Hiccup confirmed.

"What did I just say?" Astrid glowered. She opened her mouth to give him a right telling off, but he cut across and explained the situation quietly. Her annoyance faded and then flared a hundredfold upon hearing about Dagur. "And your _plan_ is still going to work?"

"We'll hear from him by the end of the week."

"How can you be sure?"

"Bjorn Junior gave me this when we landed." He held up an arrow with a scroll wrapped around it. Astrid unfurled the letter and scowled upon reading it. "Yup. My reaction exactly."

"Any idea what he has in mind?"

"I have a hunch." She raised a brow. "Let's... just let it play out for now, I don't want to jinx anything." Astrid wasn't happy with that, but inclined her head curtly. "I think it'll be pretty cool to have a Changewing in the family." He got a brief, irritated look for that and smiled. "Look, it's Ingrid's birthday and that egg needs a mother. And don't blame me, blame Toothless, he's the one that found it." Astrid frowned at the Night Fury. Toothless stuck his tongue out. "Ingrid knows what she's doing, don't worry about it. I'll get her to read up on Changewings for extra measure. Fine and dandy."

"It had better be." Astrid warned, jabbing a spoon at him. "Where is Ingrid?"

"Probably showing off her presents, you know she's like you."

"D-d-di-did I-I-In-g-gri-grid g-g-ge-get h-h-her d-d-dr-dra-dragon?" Hiccup looked round and saw Alastor coming down the stairs.

"She got a dragon egg." Alastor brightened curiously. "Don't look too excited, it's a Changewing."

"H-h-ho-how?"

"Bit of a situation. Abandoned egg. Toothless found it." Toothless chortled. "Any plans on getting your own dragon?" Alastor hunched his shoulders. "You work on that then and let me know, yeah? Need any help, just ask." His son gave him a double thumbs-up. Aloe bumbled down the stairs behind Alastor, hopping patiently for him to move to one side.

"I will get a dragon too!" She said proudly. "I will find more Night Furies and then we can all be one big family, yay!" She jumped the last few stairs and sprinted at Toothless, hugging him around the neck. He patted her on the head and cooed. "You will be up to your ears in Night Furies, Toothless! Won't that be fun?" She giggled. Toothles flipped her onto his back and she played with his ears, scratching him in the spot he couldn't ever reach.

* * *

"Hiccup, sir, we've another letter from Dagur. It's not good." Bjorn Junior pushed the arrow-sent scroll into his chief's hand. "He's on his way to talk about arrangements."

"He'll be here by the end of the week then." Hiccup sighed. "Yeah, that figures." He unscrolled the letter, frowning at the characters scribbled across the roughly made paper. "Well then, that settles it."

"Want me to call in the Berk armada and riders, sir?"

"No."

"No?" Bjorn marvelled.

"No." Hiccup repeated decisively, folding the letter into his pocket. "Don't look at me like that, I know what I'm doing. I've planned this for years. Not to worry, Bjorn, I've got this. Berk will be fine when this is all over."

"And when will that be? When will it all be over?" Hiccup just smiled. "Right. This is a Hiccup-plan. Need-to-know basis, right?" Hiccup nodded. "Very well. Let's just assume, for pity's sake, you definitely know what you're doing- which you obviously do, don't look at _me_ like that- what do you need us Berkians to do?"

"Wait."

"What?"

"I need you all to wait."

" _Wait_?"

"Yes."

"But... wait for what?"

"You'll see. I just need you to spread a message for me." Bjorn raised a brow. "All Berkians are to wait. When Dagur gets here, I want no means or cause for war, no-one is pick a fight with any Berserker unless otherwise instructed by me. Any problems they have they can relay through me to Dagur and I'll get it sorted."

"What _are_ you planning?"

"Wait and see."

* * *

 **Hopefully the next chapter shall be a little longer, I hope you all had a nice Christmas!**


	7. Chapter 7

"I can't believe you actually agreed to this." Astrid scolded from the corner of her mouth. "Why would you let _Dagur_ of all people come here without some decent plan to get him to _leave_?" Hiccup smiled as the Berserker ships came into the harbour, the first of the anchors plopping loudly into the water. "I just love that you're always full of answers."

"I know what I'm doing and this is a very good plan, I'll have you know." Hiccup elbowed her. Astrid scoffed. Dagur fell from his ship, landing on the pier. "Hello, Dagur. Nice to see you without a knife at my throat." Dagur chortled and clapped Hiccup on the shoulder.

"I've missed your humour, brother!"

"Uh-huh." Hiccup brushed Dagur's hand off. "What did you want to talk about?"

"I've not travelled all this way to talk with you out here, Hiccup! Let's have a grand feast in your honour!" Dagur latched an arm around Hiccup's shoulders, clamping him to his side. "To the Great Hall!" Hiccup glanced back to look pleadingly at his wife. Astrid simply smirked a 'I-told-you-so' smirk. "My Berserkers will come up in a bit, we really need to talk first."

"Of course." Hiccup forced a smile, sure his shoulders were molding to the firm build of his deranged guest's arm. "To the Great Hall."

* * *

Bjorn Junior had arranged simple servings of stew for the chiefs. Stoick and Gobber sat either side of Hiccup. Dagur had his right hand man, Savage, and kept glancing to the other seat, as though expecting someone else. Hiccup said nothing about this, disgusted at his demented counterpart and his slurping of the stew. He shared a look with his father, wrinkling his nose. Stoick copied. Gobber didn't notice, engrossed in his own meal. "Good?" Hiccup attempted.

"Oh, the best. Who's the chef?"

"Astrid."

"Huh. Would you mind if I hired her to be my chef?"

"Yes."

"Would _she_ mind?"

"Greatly." Dagur roughly wiped his face on his arm and burped. Hiccup pushed his bowl to one side, lacing his fingers before him on the table. "What did you want to talk about, Dagur?"

"I want to introduce you to someone."

"Oh?" Dagur motioned to Savage. He bumbled out, returning a few minutes later with a tall, cloaked figure. "Mysterious." Hiccup nodded. "I'm intrigued."

"And so you should be! I have a proposal for you! Not a marriage one, don't start that again. A better one! One that could bring peace to our tribes!" Hiccup inclined his head, not taking his eyes from his guests. "Hiccup, I would like for you to meet my son, Vadik."


	8. Chapter 8

Vadik the Vicious, as Dagur had so lovingly named him, was almost a spitting image of his father, except for the really dark hair and the non-broken nose. Take about fifteen years of life and declining mentality from Dagur, you'd get Vadik. Dressed for battle, sword in belt, knives up his sleeves, shield across his back, double-headed axe in hand, thick leather armour greaves on his lower limbs- a little soldier in the making, as determined as his father minus the majority of the insanity.

Dagur pouted. He wasn't getting the surprised reaction from Hiccup that he had wanted, only from the two lumps either side of him. "I'll say that again- I'd like for you to meet my son, Vadik."

"Hello, Vadik."

"Hello, sir." Vadik bowed his head.

"You've better manners than your dad."

"Thank you, sir."

"Hiccup!"

"Yes, Dagur?" Dagur glowered. "Oh. Wow!" Hiccup said with false amazement. "A son! Dagur, you sly thing, how come we never knew about this? Who's the mother?" Dagur didn't look content at all, but was willing to answer all the same.

"My wife. Wedded in secret. Died shortly after giving birth, that poor lass." He shook his head solemnly. Hiccup gave his best sympathetic smile. "The gods have repaid me, however, giving me a strong son in return for my wife!" He rose and grabbed Vadik under his arm. "Vadik, my boy, you should meet Hiccup's lad. What was his name again?"

"Alastor."

"Ah, good old Al. I'm sure Vadik could teach him a thing or two."

"Indeed." Hiccup agreed flatly. "Vadik, you've never been to Berk before. How about a tour before your father and I settle our business?"

"That sounds brilliant, sir."

"And there's the armoury, dragon-proofed. They love shiny things. There's the Great Hall again. If you look over there, you can just see it- that's the dragon training arena. We'll go over there later when there's a class. Do you have your own dragon yet, Vadik?"

"Not yet, sir, no. I would like a Monstrous Nightmare though."

"Doesn't one of your riders have one of them?" Dagur butted in.

"Yes. That would be Snotlout with Hookfang; very formidable team, I wouldn't go up against them if I were you. And here we have the market and Gobber's part-time workshop, part-time dragon hospital. Gobber, would you mind showing them around?" Gobber looked like he minded very much, but Stoick clearly wanted a word with his son. "I know what you're going to say, Dad." Hiccup whispered once they were out of earshot. "But this is all part of the plan, trust me."

"You always say that, Hiccup, but for once, I'd like to be clued in on this plan of yours."

"I'd rather not give away the surprise."

"Hiccup..." Stoick warned.

"Can I let this one play out?"

"The last plan you let play out around me had Mildew, Alvin and Whispering Deaths!" Stoick hissed angrily.

"And dragon root and a Screaming Death, but that worked out fine in the end, didn't it?"

"That doesn't mean I have equal faith in whatever scheme you've concoted this time."

"How about faith in me?"

"Hiccup, you know I do, but-"

"Dad, look at me. I've got this all under control, I promise you. Berk will be fine and so will everyone in it." Hiccup held out his hand. "If this all goes to pot, you can take my other leg." Stoick gripped his son's forearm, Hiccup did the same to him. Gobber returned with the other father and son set in tow. "How was it?" Hiccup asked politely.

"I never realised making dragon saddles was so tricky!" Vadik smiled.

"Oh, it's easy-peasy once you've got the hang of it. This way."

"Actually, Hiccup." Dagur sidled in, blocking Hiccup from going anywhere. "I was wondering when my Vadik will meet your delightful bunch." He forced a smile. Hiccup stayed quiet for a moment, thinking quickly. Astrid wouldn't be at home now, she said she had to help her father today. Aloe would have gone with her, without a doubt. Ingrid would be tormenting her new servants. Alastor was probably with Fishlegs, learning about hidey hole three and its vast intellectual contents. "They can't be that bad, surely?"

"Well, they're not all together. Who would you like to see first?"

"Let's go meet your heir first. Where's little Al?"

"This way. Is that alright with you, Vadik?"

"Yes, sir. I'd be more than happy to meet your son, sir." Gobber scoffed and muttered 'bum-lick' to Stoick. Hiccup heard too, having to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from laughing.

* * *

Alastor was hidden behind several stacks of Fishlegs' books, nose buried in one of the massive volumes. He looked up when his father arrived and helped shift the books around to greet them all properly. He eyed Dagur distrustfully and then raised a brow at Vadik. Hiccup introduced them, stepping back for them to shake hands.

"You're not much of a talker, are you?" Vadik smiled, all warm and friendly despite his violent get-up. "Well, it's nice to meet you. I see you like reading." Alastor nodded. "I wish I had more time to read, there's so much about dragons I'd love to learn." A nerve twitched under Dagur's eye, but he kept his fake smile in place. "Maybe you could teach me about dragons and I can teach you swordwork." To prove a point, Vadik drew his sword, executing some finely-tuned moves. "What do you say?" Alastor didn't say anything, staring at Vadik in bewilderment. He looked to his father for any hint of help. Hiccup hunched his shoulders, smiling sheepishly. Alastor mentally sighed and nodded at Vadik. "Excellent! What have you got about the Monstrous Nightmare?"

"Um, Vadik." Dagur interrupted. "Son, we've still got some things to see, people to meet. You can come back to... _books_ later. Hiccup, why does your boy not talk?"

"He's, uh... shy around new people. Once he gets used to you, he'll talk. Isn't that right, Al?" Alastor nodded again. When Vadik and Dagur left, Hiccup hissed an apology.

"Apparently, it's all part of his plan." Stoick murmured. Alastor fixed an unimpressed look on his father.

"Hey, I get enough stick from the girls, I don't need it from you too. Where's Fishlegs?"

"F-f-fo-foo-food."

"Alright then. Tell him we say hi. We'll come back later."

* * *

Astrid was _infuriated_ to come home after a long day chopping wood and gathering food in the forest and see _Dagur_ sitting at her table. She was even less pleased when Vadik was introduced, but for Hiccup's sake, she had to pretend to be the perfect hostess, serving dinner and drinks and being all nicey-nice. Hiccup was going to get a severe bruising later on.

Aloe sat with Toothless, on his head. Both of them were watching Dagur with the same keen eyes and distasteful expressions. Dagur pretended not to notice. This was the closest he had been to the Night Fury without any attempt of stealing him. "Aloe, why don't you join us?" Astrid offered.

"No." Aloe said stubbornly. "Not going near smelly bad man."

"Fair enough." Astrid nodded, ignoring Dagur's glare. She gave her youngest a bowl of vegetables- Aloe had refused to eat meat for the last week, said she was trying some 'veggie-ran' thing. Where she had got this new diet style from, her parents didn't know. They were just advised to sit out this phase and not push Aloe to eat anything she didn't want to otherwise, according to Hildegard, that would make things worse. "Anyway, Hiccup, Ingrid is set on working Arne and that into the ground."

"Good."

"Not according to their mothers."

"Pfft. Let me guess, sweet lil' Arnie-pops would never ever _ever_ hurt an ickle fly, let alone the precious son of the chief?"

"Something like that."

"Give me a break. Those kids are as rotten as Mum's cooking. Don't tell her I said that though, she'll have my head." Astrid smirked. "Devil woman." Hiccup grumbled into his goblet. "Where is Ingrid anyway?"

"Supervising Arnie-pops and co on one of the yak farms."

"Ingrid is your eldest, isn't she, Hiccup?" Dagur asked.

"You know that she is, Dagur, considering you tried to kidnap her several times when she was a baby."

"Oh, that's water under the bridge."

"The bridge collapsed." Hiccup said under his breath. "How's the egg?"

"Sneezy's looking after it."

"Come again?"

"I'm as surprised as you are."

"Egg?" Vadik asked curiously.

"Ingrid found a dragon egg and she's going to raise it."

"You haven't got any Nightmare eggs lying around, have you, sir?"

"Fresh out, I'm afraid."

"And there's the Hiccup-wit. I told you about that, son, always ready to pounce." Dagur shook his head and pushed away from the table. Vadik stood too, expectantly watching his father. "Well, let's go and meet this Ingrid of yours, Hiccup. She's the only one Vadik doesn't know yet."

"Right you are. After you." Dagur and Vadik left. Astrid grabbed Hiccup's arm.

" _What did I tell you about him_? And since _when_ does he have a _son_?" She breathed harshly. "Something's not right, Hiccup, that plan had better work." Hiccup covered her hand with his.

"It will."

"And if it doesn't?"

"You'd better sort the next-in-line dispute then." Astrid made to speak when Dagur called for Hiccup to hurry up. "I'll be back soon." Hiccup kissed her cheek and left. Astrid stared after him, torn.

* * *

"I SAID PLOUGH, NOT LAY DOWN AND CRY! GET UP, YOU USELESS BARNACLE-BRAINED, GLORIFIED TOILET SCRUBBER! Oh, hey Dad. Look what Al made for me."

"Ah, something to make you even louder. Just what we needed." Hiccup took the big cone from her and inspected it. It was similiar to a horn, almost, but amplified speech instead of creating a sound. "Ingrid, you know Dagur. This is his son, Vadik."

"Uh-huh." Ingrid said. "How much is he paying you, kid?" Vadik blinked, confused. "Look, I'm sorry- well, not really- but there is _no_ way any sane woman would have Dagur's kid, that's just... that's about as right as that frozen yak milk the Thornston twins were on about this morning. Or yaknog."

"Don't say that around your mother." Hiccup warned. Ingrid took back her loud-cone and started yelling at her servants again- _I'VE SEEN SEA SLUGS MOVE FASTER THAN THAT, PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT, YOU HALF-TROLL, SON OF A HAG, WASTE OF SPACE DIM-WITTED MOLLUSC_! Hiccup turned to Dagur and Vadik. "This is Ingrid. She's... very much like her mother, as you may have noticed. Not much longer, Ingrid. You know the rules."

"Dad, I can look after myself whether the sun's up or not. DID I SAY YOU COULD TAKE A BREAK? NO I DID NOT, NOW GET UP BEFORE I KICK YOUR LAZY FAT BACKSIDE TO VALHALLA AND BACK!" Arne started shouting in response. Ingrid fumed, flicking her hair from her eyes and squaring her shoulders. Hiccup plugged his ears. "I MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT ASK FOR YOUR OPINION! THEN AGAIN, IF I WANTED A PILE OF DUNG, I'D ASK YOUR MOTHER! I WANT THIS FIELD PLOUGHED WITHOUT DRAGONS OR I WILL COME OVER THERE AND MAKE THIS ALL LOOK LIKE A DREAM, DO YOU HEAR ME?"

"I think the whole of Berk hears you, Ingrid." Hiccup sighed, rubbing at his ears. Ingrid smiled sweetly, then glowered.

"What are you gawking at, half-pint?" She snarled at Vadik. "Shut that trap before I shove a rock down your throat." Hiccup looked Ingrid up and down. She was at least a foot shorter and nearly two years younger than Vadik, easy, and yet here she was, calling him a _half-pint_. Go figure.

Vadik hurriedly composed himself, looking questioningly to his father and then back in amazement at Ingrid, who was once again bellowing at Arne. "DON'T EVEN TRY ARGUING BACK, I WILL BURY YOU IN A PIT OF FIREWORMS AND HAVE YOU DISMEMBERED BEFORE YOU CAN CALL YOUR STUPID MOTHER FOR HELP, YOU BIG COWARD! THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR TRYING TO KILL MY BROTHER!"

"They tried to kill Alastor?"

"Alastor's not a strong swimmer. They pushed him off the docks and he nearly drowned."

"Your boy could do with a few lessons from mine." Dagur clamped his hand on Vadik's shoulder.

"My boy is perfectly fine as he is."

"He's not a fighter."

"And?"

"Every chief needs a strong male heir."

"Not necessarily." Ingrid scowled. "Girls can be just as strong as boys." Dagur burst out cackling with laughter. Ingrid burned scarlet in temper.

"Your daughter has ideas above her station, Hiccup! Oh, I haven't laughed that much in a long time! You Haddocks, you always get me!" He continued to laugh. Vadik stared at Ingrid, befuddled, as she went a deeper shade of red and drew a knife. Dagur stopped to draw breath and noticed the blade. "How cute. Didn't Daddy tell you girls can't be as strong as boys?" He cooed mockingly. Ingrid glared. "Diddums. Poor ickle Daddy's girl. Did you want to be the chief, is that it?"

"Dagur." Hiccup warned. Dagur ignored him.

"Don't worry, little girly girl, Dagur will help you. He has big plans just for you, because you're a special girl, yes you are. Hey!" Hiccup reacted before Ingrid could imbed her knife in Dagur's eye. He lunged at Vadik, stealing his sword and placing it at Dagur's throat before Vadik could even comprehend what had happened. "Hiccup, what are you doing? Give this back to my son!"

"I will when you've apologised to Ingrid."

"Oh, _please_. I'm not apologising to some _girl_."

"She's not some _girl_. She's her own woman and, as my eldest, she has as much right to be chief as Alastor does. Look at the Bog-Burglars, they're an all-female tribe."

"Yes, and they're doing splendidly." Dagur retorted sarcastically. "Why don't you send your little princess to join them?" Hiccup drove the point of his stolen weapon into Dagur's flesh. Blood seeped a scarlet line to his collar. Dagur tried to draw his own sword, but Ingrid moved faster, ducking under outstretched arms and disarming him before it was even out of his belt. She put Vadik at swordpoint too.

"Whoa!" Vadik held his hands up.

"Vadik!" Dagur scolded. "What did I teach you about surrendering?"

"To never surrender." Vadik lowered his hands meekly.

"And you especially don't surrender to some stupid girl!"

"OK, that's it!" Ingrid slashed at Vadik, cutting lose his armour in seconds. She stole his knives, axe and shield just as quickly and turned, slicing at Dagur's belt. His trousers fell about his ankles. Hiccup hastily put himself between his daughter and his rival. Ingrid turned her back, keeping Vadik in her sights. Dagur didn't wear anything under his trousers. Vadik was staring at Ingrid determinedly as his father hurried to cover his modesty. "What plans was he talking about?" She demanded hotly.

"I-I... I don't know, miss. i swear to the gods. Just, please, don't hurt my dad."

"Tell him he'd better apologise and shut his gob about girls being inferior to boys."

"Dad?" Vadik tried.

"Be serious." Dagur scoffed. "So, she took a few shiny things and my trousers fell down, whoop-dee-doo. I'd be more impressed if she had the sense about her to accept my plan."

"Dagur-" Hiccup started.

"You're not the only one to come up with plans, _Hiccup_." Dagur spat. Hiccup flinched. "Let's put down the weapons and talk about peace, huh? I'll sign a treaty to declare peace between my tribe and yours."

"What's the catch?"

"My son gets to marry your daughter."


	9. Chapter 9

**Happy New Year everyone! Pass it on! :D**

* * *

"No." Hiccup said immediately. Dagur frowned. "I thought we'd sorted this, Dagur, years ago. Our children don't need to suffer arranged marriages so their home tribes can get along, it's ridiculous!"

"Not to mention the fact that I won't do it!" Ingrid reprimanded. "I'm _eleven_ , I'm not marrying him, I'm not marrying anyone!" She rounded on Dagur, pointing an accusatory finger on him. "You're a dead man if you think you can pull this off. I suggest you take your gormless son and your stupid _armada_ and get the heck off of Berk before I mount your heads on my wall!" Vadik winced and rubbed at his throat, imagining it detached from his body.

"Ingrid." Hiccup's hand alighted on her shoulder gently. Ingrid glared at him. "I'm not agreeing to it, I wouldn't do that to you. But please, let me handle this. Go home to your mother." Ingrid looked ready to argue. "Please." Hiccup tried. She exhaled furiously, flicking her hair from her eyes irritably.

"Fine. But if either of these bozos talks to me again, I will kill them."

"I know. And I won't stop you." Ingrid nodded once and stomped off. It was Hiccup's turn to frown at his rival. Dagur copied.

"You're such a funsponge, Hiccup. Vadik is well suited to your daughter." Hiccup shook his head. "Well, if you're going to be like that, I guess I'll have to play my card." Hiccup mentally groaned in annoyance, cursing Dagur and his stupid nature. "Let's say, for example, that dear little princess Ingrid doesn't ever marry Vadik. Oh my, what could happen? What if someone was to accidentally... oh, I don't know... tell everyone about your little secret?" Hiccup's left hand curled into a fist and Dagur grinned wickedly.

"So be it." Hiccup defied. Dagur's smirk vanished in an instant. "I don't care what it takes, I'm not subjecting Ingrid to a life as his slave." He jabbed a finger at Vadik.

"I'm sure you want grandchildren too, Hiccup!"

"Dagur, I'm not discussing this with you. I've said no and, more importantly, Ingrid has said no." Hiccup snapped his fingers and Toothless joined him. Dagur scowled.

"You couldn't fight me without that Night Fury."

"I can't be bothered to fight you without that Night Fury. Vadik, it was nice to meet you. You're not as disgusting as your father and I thank you for that. But if you upset Ingrid in any way, I know where to find you." Dagur snickered.

"And what are you going to do about it, _Hiccup_?"

"We all have our secrets, Dagur." Hiccup smiled sweetly, now sat in the saddle. Dagur stared at him, confused. "Good night, Dagur. Vadik." Hiccup nodded at the boy before urging Toothless into the sky. They disappeared into the clouds within seconds. Hiccup massaged his face, letting the cool air abate his anger. "I can't believe that. He's not here even a day and he's already going back on his word." Hiccup smacked himself in the forehead. "What am I saying? I can _totally_ believe that! Oh gods... you wait until Astrid hears this. If Ingrid doesn't kill them first, she will." Toothless chortled in agreement. "You're not helping."

* * *

Hiccup was relieved to see Ingrid was at home when he arrived. He had worried himself with the possibility of Dagur's men taking her. Apparently they had tried. Ingrid was ranting about it as she walked in, using chicken legs to demonstrate her defense. "And he was all, nu-uh, not dealing with this! Tackled him and pushed him down the stairs of the Great Hall, that was fun to watch, bounce bounce bounce, splat!" She dropped the meat on her plate and waved her hands, making explosion noises. Astrid patted her on the shoulder, smiling proudly. She looked up as Hiccup dropped his cloak on the back of his chair.

"What did you say?"

"No."

"And Dagur?"

"Well, he's not happy about it. But he's going to have to lump it. Ingrid isn't going to marry the son of a lunatic. She certainly isn't going to marry before she's accepted it." Ingrid nodded confirmingly, looking mighty pleased with herself. "Oh, so you want to get married then?" She swallowed her mouthful of chicken, annoyed now.

"Not if I don't have to! For your information, _Dad_ , I'm quite happy just being me."

"You sound just like your mother." Astrid rolled her eyes, but motioned her agreement all the same. "She'd have stayed single if she hadn't met me. Isn't that right, milady?"

"Shut up, you fathead." Astrid snorted. Ingrid smirked. Alastor bumbled down the stairs. "Whoa, what's the rush?" Astrid grabbed him by the shoulders. "And where's Aloe?" Another clattering on the steps and their youngest appeared, her beloved dragon toy in hand. She raced around the room, making whooshing noises and roaring. Toothless roared back and pawed at her curiously. "Aloe. Aloe! Oh gods, this is one is definitely _your_ daughter." Aloe dodged her mother's hands, giggling, and scrambled to Hiccup's side, bouncing. Hiccup sat her on his lap and smiled. Her dragon growled at him. He pretended to be scared for her sake and she seemed very happy with that. "Al, sit down." Astrid directed her son into a chair and slid a plate of food before him. A bowl of vegetables greeted Aloe.

"Hey, Al. Get this." Ingrid leant forward. "Dagur wants me to marry that Vadik kid." Alastor froze, chicken leg halfway to his mouth. "I know right! Bloody cheek! And then some of his dunderheads tried to kidnap me on the way home! One of them had to be peeled from the bottom of the Great Hall stairs!" Alastor set his food down, a dozen questions zipping behind his eyes.

"Eat your food, all of you." Hiccup instructed, pinching one of Aloe's carrots. Astrid tutted and served up his meal. "Thank you." He smiled.

Their meal was interrupted halfway through by a thunderous knocking on the door. "If that's Dagur, tell him to come back tomorrow. I'm off duty."

"Dad says to come back tomorrow or he'll cover you in doody."

"That's not what I said Ingrid!" Hiccup sat Aloe on the table and went to the door. "Dagur, no means no. Ingrid isn't marrying Vadik, Vadik isn't marrying Ingrid, good night." He tried to shut the door, by Dagur stuck his foot in the way. Hiccup grumbled a few curses he told Ingrid not to repeat, a futile order, and pulled the door open again, just enough for him to slip outside and face Dagur.

"Listen, Hiccup, you didn't let me finish explaining earlier."

"Because I don't care."

"When I said for Ingrid and Vadik to marry, I didn't mean right away. I meant when she's old enough."

"Give it about forty years then." Hiccup folded his arms. Dagur grunted. A snarl from above signalled Toothless was on the roof, keeping an eye on things. "She's not marrying your son."

"What if she wants to in a few years time?"

"Then that's her decision."

"Can Vadik have your permission to court her until then?"

"No."

"You always make things so difficult, Hiccup!" Dagur stomped his feet, like a toddler having a tantrum. Hiccup blinked slowly, unimpressed. "You said you liked Vadik!"

"I said I prefered him to you, that doesn't necessarily mean I like him."

"You're impossible." Dagur growled. Hiccup inclined his head. "You listen to me, _Hiccup_. Vadik _will_ marry Ingrid whether you like it or not, whether _anyone_ likes it or not! I don't care! You've kept everything from me ever since you were small! Well, small- _er_."

"Yes, very original, well done, Dagur."

"This is my chance to take something from you, to settle the score!"

"No. That's it stomp your feet, very nice. Very mature. When you've grown a few extra brain cells, come back to me and we'll try and have a halfway decent conversation where you take _no_ as answer." Hiccup returned inside, taking great satisfaction from shutting the door in Dagur's face. His family had all been listening in, smiling. "What?"

"It's like talking to toddler Ingrid all over again." Astrid laughed. "Good days."

"Yeah." Hiccup agreed. "The days where we could drop her in a barrell and put the lid on until Dad arrived to tell her off."

"I remember that barrell!" Ingrid exclaimed. "And Grandad Stoick telling me off, but I never realised you two were behind it! I'm sticking you both in barrells when your time comes, you ain't getting no ship."

"Such a lovely daughter."

"Your daughter."

"Hiccup, if I wanted your opinion-"

"You'd ask. I was wondering where Ingrid got that from." Toothless came back down the stairs, crossing to scratch at the door. "Is he still out there, bud?" Toothless whined. "Give him a bite on the bum, that'll send him off." The Night Fury cooed happily, pawing the door open and chasing after Dagur. "I love that dragon."


	10. Chapter 10

Dejected, Alastor kicked a pebble. It clattered against a tree trunk and disappeared amongst its roots. He sighed and sought another stone to play with. He had had a rough morning, Arne and co teasing him for his stammer and then the Jorgenson twins trying to dump buckets of dragon dung on his head. He had managed to escape, listening to Snotlout shouting at his boys in a voice so loud, Alastor was surprised the gods hadn't descended to tell Snotlout to shut it.

And, obviously, there was this whole business with Dagur and his son, Vadik. Alastor had completely forgotten they were going to visit, so engrossed in the books Fishlegs had given him, everything else had just... fallen away. Dagur definitely had some nerve though, trying to get Ingrid to marry Vadik. That was about as likely to happen as it was for Alastor to be anything like his father.

Alastor stopped and looked back. He could see Berk from here, like a little toy town. Tiny black specks swooped all over, dragons and their riders. Alastor wished _he_ had a dragon. He had a Terror, his sisters did too. Sharpshot and Rage were Hiccup's, Shadow was Astrid's, Sneezy's was Ingrid's (and she had that Changewing egg), Alastor had Bitey and Aloe had Bob. And of course there were all the other Terrors that came in to visit. Their house was like a Terrible Terror hotspot. More Terrors arrived each day than Vikings did and that was saying something. Each villager had an issue they wanted Hiccup's help with. The latest batch of problems had all been something to do with the Berserkers. Hiccup was rushed off his odd feet trying to keep the peace. Alastor didn't see himself coping with something like that. Ingrid was better of being the chief when the time came, not him. It wasn't like anyone would take him seriously anyway, not with how he spoke. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get a straight sentence out without stammering. Despite Waiola and Snotlout's best attempts, Orrick and Shamus found it hilarious and would stop at nothing to torment him about it.

He heard a Monstrous Nightmare call and looked up. He had all day in the woods, away from muttonheads and Berserkers and desperate Vikings. Maybe he could find his own dragon. What about a Nightmare? No. Arne had a Nightmare. He didn't want the bully to think he was copying him. His two braindead friends had Nightmares as well. The Jorgenson twins shared a Zippleback, twins usually had Zipplebacks. Those exotic beasts needed two riders. A number of Vikings had tried to fly a Zippleback solo, but two heads, two different minds? No such luck, very much pain.

The bushes rustled to his left. He could see a pair of Gronckle eyes staring back at him. He knelt slowly, one hand up to appease the wild dragon, the other taking hold of a fist-sized rock. He rose just as steadily and held the rock up. The Gronckle edged forward, tongue out eagerly. Alastor tossed the rock to it and it was gone instantly, gobbled up. The dragon snuffled the ground for more treats and, finding none, bumbled away. Alastor didn't want a Gronckle anyway. They were nice enough dragons, but he wasn't interested in having one. He started walking again, hands in his pockets. He could ask his dad if they could go to Dragon Island or the Edge, like for Ingrid's birthday. She had come back with a Changewing egg, maybe he could find something just as cool. There were hundreds of dragons all over the Archipelago and further out. Alastor hadn't seen them all personally, but he had read about them in the Dragon Chronicles. The Book had been disbanded years ago when it was far too full. The Dragon Riders had edited it all into a dozen volumes. Alastor had read them all, at least twenty times each. He didn't mind. He liked having the information in his mind rather than on paper before him. He could easily search every bush for every size dragon, from the nanodragons to the basic wild dragons to the higher classes, such as Deathsongs or Scauldrons. Not that that was impressive to the likes of Arne or the Jorgenson twins.

Lost in thought, Alastor didn't notice the protruding tree root until his foot snagged. He went tumbling and rolling down a hill, crashing through brush and scraping his arms on rocks. He landed in a heap in the middle of a small clearing, ears ringing and grazed all over. He made to get up, only to be stopped by a cluster of Nadder barbs stabbing into the ground, slicing into the skin of his hands. Carefully, he looked up. A red and green Nadder stood ten feet away, pupils narrow slits in anger, spines on the tail out and ready to fire again. It was facing the left, keeping Alastor in sight.

"H-h-hi t-t-th-there." He said softly, getting to his feet with no sudden movements. He held his hands up to show his lack of weapons. The Nadder squawked warningly. More spines swished out, thudding into the tree behind Alastor, flicking a scarlet line across his cheek. "S-s-sp-spi-spike. I-i-i-it-it's O-O-O-K-K. I-I-I w-w-w-wo-won't h-h-h-hurt y-y-you." He took a cautious step forward and the dragon howled at him, flames sparking warningly from his jaws. Alastor bowed his head, crouching slightly with his hands out to the Nadder. He had learnt this from his mother- Nadders were much happier if they believed they were the alpha in a situation.

And it worked. The fire died down and the spikes on the tail fell flat. The dragon edged forward, indecisive. Who was this small human boy and what was he doing?

Alastor reached into his shoulder bag, drawing his lunch out. It was a leg of chicken from last night's dinner. Nadders loved chicken though. This one lowered his tail and squawked happily. Alastor held the meat level and at arm's length. His new friend eyed him cautiously, closing the distance in careful, thought out steps.

The chicken vanished in the blink of an eye. Seconds later, the Nadder spat the bone out. He snuffled Alastor expectantly. "I-I-I d-d-do-don't h-ha-ha-have a-a-an-anymore." Instead of getting mad, the Nadder shuffled his wings and licked Alastor's face. Relief rushed through Alastor and he spat on his hand, smoothing his palm over the Nadder's shoulder. The dragon seemed happy with that and allowed Alastor to scratch behind the horns, a place he knew from experience that they could never reach. "G-g-g-go-good b-b-boy." Alastor smiled. He held his hand out, like his father had done millions of times, and the Nadder rested his nose against it. "I-I-I t-t-t-th-thin-think I-I-I'll c-c-call y-y-yo-you S-S-Sp-Spike." Spike seemed happy with that. Alastor, staying out of the blind spot, moved round and jumped up, putting his foot onto the wing joint and sliding onto Spike's back. He massaged spit onto the dragon's scales again to calm him and then Spike started running. Alastor held onto the crown of horns, grinning excitedly.

* * *

Hiccup looked out the window, worried. Alastor was never late home for dinner. He knew to be on time. Hiccup hoped he was OK. His son could handle himself well enough, unless his nerves got in the way. With dragons, yes. Alastor would be fine. With humans? No. Not necessarily. Oh gods, what if he had run into the Berserkers? Dagur had kicked off big time, he would do anything to score points against Hiccup, whether Alastor was causing trouble or not.

"He'll be here in a bit, Hiccup." Astrid said. She was laying the table. Ingrid was stirring the beef stew and wrinkling her nose, Sneezy on her shoulder. Aloe was with Toothless in the corner, sitting on his back and lying forward against his head, covering his eyes and playing peekaboo, giggling every time the Night Fury moved his ears and tickled her under the arms or chin.

"Yeah, don't stress, Dad." Ingrid added, pulling a face as she ladled stew up and let it fall back in the pot. Sneezy grunted in disgust. Astrid tutted and started fussing over the dinner. Ingrid joined her father at the window. "You know what Al's like. He'll come back with a hoard of baby dragons he rescued from Snatchers or something, you watch." Hiccup hummed, Sneezy scrambling up his back to sit on his shoulder.

"Ingrid, that's not helping." Astrid pointed out. "Aloe, go and wash your hands." Her youngest sprang up, waving farewell to Toothless with a big grin, before disappearing into the back room. "You too, Ingrid. Hiccup, what are you doing?"

"I'm going to look for him." Hiccup shrugged Sneezy off.

"Hiccup-" The chief looked at his wife. A silent conversation passed between them. Astrid sighed and waved him away. Hiccup donned his cloak. Toothless sidled up to him, saddle in his mouth.

"No, wait! Look!" Ingrid, having not left to do as she was told, was leaning out the window and pointing at the sky. She had obtained a set of Astrid's dual long-lookers and was staring up, beaming. "He's there!" She handed her father the long-lookers. Hiccup saw his son instantly, worry flowing out of him like water through a dam.

Alastor and Spike landed a minute later. Alastor was grinning as broadly as his older sister, his blond hair a tangled mess and cheeks scarlet with cold. He waved at them, dropping down from his dragon. Hiccup crossed his arms expectantly.

"H-h-hi D-D-Da-Dad. I-I-I g-g-g-got a-a-a d-dr-dra-dragon."

"I can see that."

"H-h-h-he's c-c-cal-called S-S-Sp-Spike."

"Mum, look! Al has a dragon!" Astrid appeared in the doorway, smiling proudly when she saw she had recruited her son to the Nadder cause.

"Attaboy, Al!" She praised, hugging her son. "Nadders are the best." Toothless grunted in disagreement. "Yeah, I said it. Shut your face."

"Spike, huh?" Hiccup asked, inspecting the new arrival. The Nadder watched him dubiously. Hiccup stared back. "You've fed him chicken." Alastor nodded and his parents smiled. Hiccup held his hand out to the Nadder. Spike hesitated for a moment and then pushed his nose to this new human's palm. "He's not very old." Hiccup acknowledged, checking under the dragon's chin. "Only a year younger than you, Al."

"C-c-c-ca-can I-I-I k-k-ke-kee-keep h-h-hi-him p-p-pl-ple-please?"

"As my dad would say, you've named him. Can't throw him out now." Hiccup grinned. Astrid did too, smothering the life from her son in another, bone-crushing hug. "I take it you called him Spike because he shot barbs at you." Hiccup moved forward, tucking his hand under his son's chin and turning his head this way and that. "Yeah, look. Cut there. And on his hands. Did you fall?"

"T-t-tr-tri-trip-tripped."

"I'll get those cleaned up." Astrid promised. "Come in. Yes, you too, Spike. I'm sure we'll make room." She smirked at her husband. "I believe I'm winning."

"We've got Aloe to get through yet, milady. Don't count your Terrors before they've hatched."

* * *

 **Happy New Year everyone, best of wishes to you all for 2016!**


	11. Chapter 11

**I apologise for not responding to reviews. Fanfiction shows me that the numbers have gone up, but it's not showing me any new content. When the reviews show themselves, I'll reply. Thank you!**

* * *

"Can't you just send them home?" Ingrid complained to her father. "Vadik keeps trying to talk to me and he's so _boring_. Well, I assume he is, I don't listen." Hiccup smiled, scribbling something on his blueprint. "Is that another tail for Toothless?" Ingrid sighed. "You've got, like, a million of them." She walked around the table, tilting her head to examine the new plans. "What is that?"

"Building plans for the Edge. Going to extend on the old huts. Like a home-from-home for the classes. They stay there a while and research the dragons, learn about them firsthand, so on and so forth. Al gave me the idea, said he wished he could spend more time on the Edge. Would you be up for it?"

"Maybe. Depends who I go with. And if you sort out the little Berserker situation."

"Are you trying to blackmail me?" Hiccup asked amusedly.

"Not trying. I am blackmailing you. Get rid of the idiots and I'll spend the rest of my life on the Edge if I have to, I don't care, I just want them gone."

"The rest of your life on the Edge, eh?"

"That was exaggeration, don't- ugh, gods, you're a pain." Ingrid took his pencil and made a few adjustments. Hiccup let her, silently elated whenever she showed interest in his work. "How much longer have they got to be here?"

"However long I want."

"Then, why did you invite them here at all?" Ingrid huffed. Hiccup said nothing, that almost smug, all-knowing look behind the innocent and mock-oblivious smile. "Let me guess, this has something to do with your grand _plan_." He nodded, smile turning into a triumphant smirk. "Can I know what it is yet?" No. "You're no fun anymore."

"Hey, I resent that comment. Who let you keep the Changewing egg?"

"Some idiot."

"Are you calling your dad an idiot?"

"Yeah. I appreciate the Changewing egg though. Al helped me figure out when it's going to hatch." Hiccup raised a brow, redrawing a few lines. "About two weeks. And Changewings grow really quickly too. Give it about two years and I'll have a dragon big enough to ride. Al said that Changewings keep growing until they're about five and then they're fully-grown. They live for about fifty to seventy years, so that's not so bad." Toothless returned, Aloe in his saddle with her precious dragon toy clutched to her chest. She beamed at them. She was too little to fly Toothless, but the Night Fury was more than willing to walk about with her on his back. "How long do Night Furies live?"

"Mmm..." Hiccup scratched at his chin, wrinkling his nose. "You might have to ask Mum on that one. Problem with Toothless being the only Night Fury, he's our little test subject too." Toothless snorted. "Don't take that tone with me." Hiccup warned playfully. "You love having your picture drawn. Everybody knows that." He shook his head. "So vain." Toothless slapped his ear against his rider's arm. Aloe hopped from his back and unto the table, inspecting the new plans.

"I want my own room." She told her father.

"Aloe Aloe. It's that school I was telling you about."

"Ooh, the one on the Edge?"

"Yes."

"Can I go?"

"When you're old enough."

"I'm never old enough!" Aloe pouted. Hiccup and Ingrid blinked and exchanged confused looks. "When can I get my own dragon, Daddy? And not a Terror, I want a big dragon! Can I have Toothless when you're old?" Toothless huffed.

"He'll probably retire with me."

"I'll find my own Toothless then." Aloe defied, tipping her chin up.

"If you do that, I'll give you a medal."

"A gold one?"

"Yeah." Hiccup shrugged. Aloe grinned, sweet and bubbly once more.

* * *

"Hello, Alastor." Alastor looked up from his new cleaning supplies and frowned at Vadik. "I don't want to cause any trouble. I just heard you got yourself a dragon and I wanted to look, if that was alright with you, of course." Alastor shrugged. His mother had helped him buy dragon hygiene equipment that morning and now he had to give Spike his first bath. Spike was being kept in the lean-to for now, something Hiccup had promised to have enlarged so all the dragons could fit comfortably. The young Nadder was chasing Stormfly while the Terrors watched on. Stormfly flapped up onto the roof and squawked at her new housemate.

Spike turned as Alastor approached, chirping in greeting, nuzzling his new friend affectionately. He sniffed at Vadik and pawed the ground. "Is something wrong?" Alastor shook his head, placing the bucket of water on the floor. Spike inspected that, snuffling and taking a drink before he realised it had soap in. Alastor pulled on his crown and the Nadder grumbled at him. "Why do you not talk whenever I'm around?" Alastor didn't answer, soaking the bristle brush. Spike was wary at first, but when the moisture soothed his scales, he sat, blissfully content. Nadders liked to be clean and, while they did their own fair share of grooming, they couldn't always get the dirt and grime from their scales. "Can I ask you something?" Alastor shrugged, not looking round. "I had no idea my father was going to pull a stunt like that. Would Ingrid believe me if I told her so?" Alastor paused, brush hovering over a mudstain on Spike's shoulder. Eventually, he waved his hand unhelpfully, resuming his dragon's bathtime.

Vadik sighed. Alastor glanced over at him. Vadik had sat himself on a nearby rock, leaning forward on the hilt of his sword. "I mean no-one in your family harm, yet... my father does not agree with it. He hates you. And by you, I mean your family, particularly your father." Vadik hesitated. "Dad often says I'm too much like my mother, no matter how hard I try to please him. I've done years of combat training, military training, sailing, weapons, survival skills. I never remember Dad giving me a toy. He's always handed me weapons." Alastor saw the reflection of the older boy in his Nadder's wary eye, still perched on that rock, unmoving. "I guess I'm not the Berserk he wants me to be."

Alastor felt as though he was supposed to say something now. He ran his thumb over the bristles worriedly, wiping the suds on his shirt. He looked back. Vadik had lost some of his armour from when Alastor last saw him. From what he had heard, that was Ingrid's doing. Vadik was of slighter build than Alastor inititally thought, maybe one or two stages up from a hiccup. Alastor knew his sword was not the same, seeing as Ingrid had swiped that also. All the same, despite his posture, Vadik still had the look of a chief's son. Looking down at himself, Alastor didn't. He had none of the fighter's air, none of his father's charm or cheekiness, none of his mother's soldier nature or defiance. Ingrid was the soldier, Aloe was the peace keeper. Alastor was stuck in the middle, only useful for dragon information and even then, he couldn't share that properly either. Not with taking an hour to finish a sentence.

Instead, he pulled Vadik to his feet, taking the sword from his hand. He tossed it to one side and gave him the brush instead. Spike shuffled closer, wanting bath time to continue. Vadik looked from one to the other, eyes alone moving back and forth. "Are you trying to tell me something?" He asked. Alastor picked up the bucket and held it out to him. Something clicked in Vadik's mind. "I don't have to be like my dad. There's always another option." Alastor nodded. Vadik smiled. "You're a good listener. And, for a guy who doesn't talk, very clever."

"Oh, he does talk." Ingrid said. "Hey, bro. I've been looking for you everywhere. Dad was telling me about that Edge thing. Very impressive." Alastor smiled gratefully. Vadik chewed his lip. Ingrid noticed the things he was holding. "Are you giving Spike a bath?"

"Well..." Vadik started. Alastor nodded. "Oh. Are you sure? He's your dragon." Spike nudged Alastor forward. "I think he wants you." Vadik handed the cleaning things back. "Any other things you could give me to tell my dad?"

"Tell your dad what?"

"I'm..." Vadik stopped, voice catching. "I'm not a Berserk."

"Oh?" Ingrid met her brother's gaze. Alastor bowed his head. "Daddy issues?"

"I... I don't know." A horn in the distance blew. Vadik sighed. "I have to go. Thank you." He smiled at Alastor and trotted off down the hill. The siblings watched him go.

"What did he have to say for himself?"

"H-h-he h-ha-had n-n-n-no i-i-id-ide-idea a-a-ab-abo-about th-th-the m-ma-mar-marri-marriage t-th-thi-thing. N-n-no-not u-u-unt-until y-yo-you d-d-d-did."

"Bit strange, don't you think?"

"D-D-Da-Dagur."

"True."

"I-I-I t-th-think h-h-he wa-wan-wants t-t-to b-be y-yo-your f-fr-frie-friend."

"And how do I know this isn't some trick?" Alastor shrugged. "Exactly."

"N-n-ni-nice t-t-to m-m-me."

"Probably because he wants something. All blokes are nice if they want something. Fine, _most_ blokes. You look like Dad pulling that face."

"Told you he got my good looks." The pair looked round to see their father sitting on the doorstep.

"When did you get there?"

"I've been here for ages. Alastor's not wrong, Ingrid. Vadik was being nice to him. And it looked like he wanted a second opinion more than anything else." A sparkle danced in Hiccup's eyes, a little victory. Ingrid was dubious. Either Vadik was a set-up or, by some miracle, he was being genuine and, if that was the case, it was playing right into Hiccup's hands.


	12. Chapter 12

**To Guest- Thank you for reading them all, I'm so glad you like them! :D**

* * *

Vadik arrived that second morning, limping and wincing, holding his ribs. Aloe met him, already playing outside with the Terrors. She yelled for her mother upon seeing his approach. Astrid rushed out, axe in hand.

"Vadik?" She puzzled. "Are you alright?"

"Just tripped."

"Uh-huh." She said disbelievingly. "HICCUP!" She bellowed. Hiccup leant out the window upstairs, half-asleep. "You're needed!" He said nothing, taking in the situation. He disappeared, walking out to meet them, his shirt on backwards. "He reckons he _tripped_."

"Yeah, fat chance. What did Dagur do?" Vadik blinked at him. Hiccup sighed. "Dagur has a tantrum if things don't go his way. Trust me, I know. He didn't like you talking to Al, did he?" Hiccup looked past the boy's shoulder. "Hey, Dagur!" The figure darted behind the bush. Hiccup righted his tunic and made his way over.

"Hiccup! Fancy finding you here!"

"You're literally on my doorstep. What did you do?"

" _Do_? What do you mean?"

"I mean, what did you do to Vadik?"

"Why would you care?"

"So you did something to Vadik?"

"No."

"You hurt him."

"I did not!"

"Mm-hm. You're a terrible father."

"Says you! Your son can't even _talk_!" A stone clonked against Dagur's helmet and he whirled around. Alastor stood with Spike, arms folded. Spike snarled, the barbs on his tail ready to hurl. "How _dare_ you?" Dagur drew his sword. Hiccup elbowed him in the face, snatching the blade from his stunned fingers and pressing the tip to his throat.

"I'm getting bored of this, Dagur." Dagur scowled at the blood on the back of his hand. "Let me take a guess. You saw Vadik talking to Alastor, admitting that he wasn't happy with your methods or ideas and, obviously, you didn't like that. So, you waited until he got back to camp, made out everything was alright, maybe even said he didn't have to marry. Then, his back turned, you hit him." Dagur's expression tightened, Vadik flinched. "Because you can't face your problems. You never have Dagur, not directly. You've always made a big show of things, you can't handle _anything_ going against your wishes, not even your own son. He's not a toy, Dagur. He's his own person as much as you are, as much as we all are." The Berserker hawked and spat at his rival chief. An outburst rose from the other Haddocks, Spike roared and shot flames. Alastor raised his hand, the Terrors swarming on command. Hiccup blinked. "Fine." He said, wiping his face on his sleeve. Toothless and Stormfly were on the roof. Hiccup motioned with his fingers and Dagur was chased away by a dozen angry reptiles. Alastor lowered his hand, Spike alone with him.

"What about him, Dad?" Ingrid nodded at Vadik. Hiccup considered the teen.

"Did you honestly mean what you said yesterday?"

"Yes, sir."

"You know what would happen if you hurt any of these, wouldn't you?"

"They'd probably kill me, sir." Ingrid snorted.

"Oh, we wouldn't just _kill_ you."

"Granted, miss." Vadik bowed his head. Hiccup was testing the weight of his new toy. "Sir?" The chief glanced up. "What do I do now, sir?" A silent conversation swam between the head Berkian and his wife. Astrid inclined her head, slinging her axe across her back. Hiccup spun the sword in his hand, presenting the handle to Vadik. The boy did a double-take.

"Alastor told you yesterday. You've a choice. You can go back to your father and have him treat you as he's always done. Or you can stay here, until we get things properly sorted for you."

"I... sir, I don't... I don't know... he's my dad, after all..." Vadik pushed his hands desperately through his hair.

"If he's that much of a pain, I can take care of him for you." Ingrid offered.

"Ingrid, no assassinations. We've talked about this."

"You talked. I didn't listen."

"No, of course not." Hiccup sighed. "Vadik, it's up to you. If need be, you can stay here for a while. I'll sort Dagur out."

"How?"

"Ooh, is this the plan, Daddy?" Aloe asked excitedly.

"Plan?" Vadik frowned. "What plan?"

"A top secret plan." Hiccup put a finger to his lips. Aloe copied. "Al, fly after Dagur, make sure he's not causing anymore trouble. Ingrid, take Vadik inside, calm him down." His eldest two nodded and seperated. Vadik watched Alastor fly off. "Aloe, why don't you show him one of the Dragon books?"

"Really?" Aloe brightened. "Come on!" She grabbed Vadik's hand and dragged him inside, babbling about all her favourite dragons- all of them. Ingrid sent her parents' a confused look before trudging inside. Hiccup pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. Astrid laid a hand on his chest and shoulder.

"Hey." She breathed. "It'll be OK, don't worry."

"Oh, you're a right joker, you are. Don't worry. That's probably the best one I've heard in a long time."

"Hiccup-"

"I know, shut up me, I'm sorry." Astrid straightened his shirt, sighing. "What do I do?"

"What does it say in here?" She asked, pressing her fingertips closer to his heart.

"Get Vadik away from Dagur. No child should be in an abusive family."

"And your plan?" She could see the gears working in his mind. "Will that help Vadik?" She prompted gently. Hiccup bit the inside of his cheek, thoughts racing. Astrid waited patiently, toying with his tossled hair.

"Yes. Yes it can. I've just remembered something." He smiled at her, gripping her shoulders. "Astrid, you're a genius." He pulled her in for a kiss and ran off.

"You're still in your bed things! Toothless, get that loon!" She ordered. The Night Fury roared and sprinted after his rider. Sighing at her husband's impulsiveness, she walked in. Vadik was sat at the table, Aloe standing on his lap to show him all the best bits of the first Dragon book. Ingrid was sat, slouched in her seat, keeping a watchful eye on everything. Alastor was yet to return. "Feeling better?" She asked her guest kindly, stacking the bowls from breakfast. Vadik started to speak; Ingrid interrupted.

"He's not ill, just bruised. Take it like a Viking!" She scolded.

"Ingrid!"

" _What_?" She stared at her mother, dumb-founded. Vadik laughed, surprising them both.

"No, it's OK. She's right."

"Ha!" Ingrid punched the air victoriously. Vadik smiled and she glowered at him. "Just because you've said something right for a change doesn't mean I'm going to start liking you."

"You really are my daughter."

"Daddy always tells you that, Mummy." Aloe said wisely. "Look! Driller Dragons! They're so cool." She started buzzing and miming rocks breaking and rocketing in all directions, roaring to finish it off. Vadik clapped politely, unsure of what else he could do. Aloe beamed at him. "If you don't like him, Ingrid, I will."

"That's very nice." Ingrid retorted, sinking into her seat once more. A Nadder squawked outside and Alastor ventured in. "Anything?" He shook his head, pointing questioningly at their new housemate. "Mum and Dad said he could stay here for a bit until Dad sorted Dagur out." Alastor nodded, giving Vadik a thumbs up. "How long until Dad sorts Dagur out?" She propped her elbow on the table, drumming her fingers on her lips.

"Ingrid, don't be rude. Vadik is our guest."

"But he's Dagur's kid."

"Not something I think he's overly happy with right now." Astrid raised a brow at Vadik, who nodded sheepishly in agreement. "Don't worry about it, kid. Hiccup may be a bit of an idiot, but he mostly knows what he's doing, I'm sure of it. Like, eighty percent sure. That's got to count for something, right?" Alastor raised his hand. "Al, don't- just speak, sweetheart." He shot an anxious look to Vadik, wringing his hands.

"T-Too-Tooth-l-less i-i-is se-set-setting f-f-fire t-t-to Da-Dag-Dagur's b-b-bo-boat." Astrid cursed, dragon-calling for Stormfly and rushing out. Alastor burned crimson and turned away at Vadik's stunned expression.

"Vadik." Ingrid hissed crossly.

"He can talk!"

"Yes, we told you that."

"But... is he really nervous or...?"

"No, he's just had a little trouble speaking since Arne and that nearly drowned him."

"Your slaves?"

"Yeah."

"But why did they try to drown you?"

"They're just bullies. Al, don't let them get to you. They're jerks. Besides, tomorrow, I've got a great plan for them now."

"W-w-wh-what?" Ingrid smiled devilishly.

"Clearing up Dagur's ship."

* * *

 **This is a filler chapter. I may do one more until I can use my proper idea! I hope it's alright!**

 **Also, I've got two new stories up-** _ **How To Pick Your Wife**_ **and** _ **Rainbow Snowcone**_ **! I'd be really grateful if you could check them out! Thank you! :D**


	13. Chapter 13

Vadik stayed at the Haddocks for almost a week. In that time, he proved to be a very thoughtful and generous young man willing to help with any task. He sat with Aloe in the evenings, enjoying her demonstrations of the Dragon Books. In the morning, he spent time with Alastor, learning firstheand about various dragons. Every other afternoon, he would spar with Ingrid in the arena. In his spare time, he helped Astrid around the house, with the dragons, with her classes and then he would run messages for her and Hiccup. In return, Hiccup had pryed Dagur from his son's back, putting him on the spot in front of the village for being a harsh and uncaring father. Some of the Berkians, the children in particular, had warmed to Vadik. Even Alastor talked more around him, relieved Vadik didn't tease him for his stammer. His new friend even chased down the Jorgenson twins for taking the mick _and_ he helped Ingrid work Arne, Snorre and Rolf harder that week as well, giving her ideas he probably shouldn't have.

"She'll kill me for saying this," Hiccup began, standing beside his wife as they watched the pair train, "but I think Ingrid is starting to like Vadik."

"As a friend."

"Oh, of course. She's only eleven. You saw her face when she saw what Vadik did to Lout's boys. And when Waiola told them off." Astrid nodded in agreement, smiling. "I quite like him."

"Me too."

"Reckon we can adopt?"

"Reckon Dagur will have something to say about that." Astrid hefted a shoulder. "But the village is keeping him at aby. That's always good." Hiccup inclined his head. "What about Dagur though? What if he kicks off again?" Her husband waved that away. Astrid hummed. "I suppose its something to have a village against you. Light the torches, get the pitchforks and maces, that sort of thing."

"Would you, by any chance, be planning a revolt, milady?" Astrid gave her most innocent smile. "Should I worry?"

"No." Hiccup felt a tug on his sleeve. Alastor waved timidly. "Hello." Astrid grinned. "Are you alright?"

"I-I-I w-w-wa-want t-t-to s-see G-Go-Gothi."

"What for, bud?" Hiccup asked, smoothing his son's hair back.

"M-ma-ma-mayb-be s-sh-she c-c-co-could hy-hy-hypn-no-hypnotise m-m-me." His parents stared at him. "T-to g-ge-get r-ri-rid o-of th-th-this." He tapped his fingers against his throat. "S-sh-she c-ca-can d-d-do th-that? R-ri-right?"

"I'd have thought so." Astrid touched her son's cheek, smiling comfortingly. "When do you want to go?"

"C-ca-can w-w-we g-go n-no-now?"

"Of course we can." Hiccup beamed. Alastor sighed in relief and smiled at them gratefully.

* * *

Gothi was more than happy to help, but she did scribble a vicious telling-off to Hiccup for accepting Dagur into Berk. "He's a guest. Sort of. And watch your language!" He covered Alastor's eyes. "No, I'm not just as bad, that's Astrid." Astrid barged him out of the way.

"Gothi, thank you for this." Gothi smiled. "Al, take a seat." Now he was here, Alastor was a sickly grey and seemed to regret his choice. "Hey." Astrid said softly, leaning down to be eye-level with him. "We'll be right here. And Gothi won't do anything else, she's very good. Besides, that Thor Bonecrusher incident only happened because Snotlout couldn't keep his trap shut. You'll still be our Al." She squidged his face between her palms, kissing the top of his head. Hiccup smirked. Astrid noticed. "And I'll make sure that he behaves. Isn't that right, _Hiccup_?"

"Oh, very." Astrid directed her son kindly to the chair, giving his shoulder a final, reassuring squeeze. Hiccup's smile was less devious, kinder and gentler. Gothi stood before the youngster, raising her staff. Alastor was asleep within seconds. "Alastor." Hiccup said calmly. "You will speak without stammering, as you spoke before the near-drowning dibocal." He paused. "And you won't worry about everything as much as you do, you'll be calmer, but still you." Astrid nodded approvingly. Hiccup signalled to the elder. Gothi snapped her fingers. Alastor awoke with a start. "Hey. How are you feeling?"

"Better. Hey! It worked!"Alastor grinned broadly, jumping to his feet. "Thank you, Gothi!" She bowed her head, smiling. Alastor bounced excitedly and then sprinted down the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Astrid called after him.

"To tell Arne to shove off!"

"That's my boy!" Hiccup beamed proudly. "Wait, I don't want to miss this. Al, wait up! Thanks again, Gothi, we owe you!"

* * *

Arne, Snorre and Rolf were working in the arena, helping Ingrid and Vadik with target practise. They were running around, trying not to be hit while standing targets up and clearing what mess they could, retrieving weapons on command. Vadik noticed Alastor first.

"You look happy. What did we miss?"

"Probably something useless and nerdy." Arne muttered. Ingrid readied her axe. Alastor caught her by the wrist, jerking a thumb at himself, still grinning.

"What have you done?" She hissed.

"I got my voice back." Ingrid's face lit up and she squeezed her brother in a hug. Vadik nodded approvingly. "Which means I can tell you," He looked at Arne, "to _bugger off_ or I will _personally_ use you as a pincushion." He whistled and Spike appeared above the arena. Ingrid nodded, impressed. Arne scoffed.

"Oh, please. You don't have the nerve." Hiccup and Astrid caught up then, Hiccup out of breath, but laughing.

"Goodie. We haven't missed anything. Kick his ass, Al."

"Hiccup!" Astrid scolded.

"Oh yeah. I'm not watching." He covered his eyes and turned his back, but then immediately peeked over his shoulder.

"Come on then, _runt_. Kick my ass." Arne challenged. Ingrid looked to her brother, who seemed very pleased with himself. Snorre and Rolf fell in either side of their friend, cracking their knuckles. Spike landed behind his rider, flaring his tail warningly. Vadik ducked the first array of barbs, lifting his shield above his head. Ingrid simply let the shots zip past her face.

"Al, I will _pay_ you to let me take the other two."

"I bet you can't take me without that stupid dragon." Arne snarled, straightening his helmet. Alastor contemplated Spike for a moment, hands on his hips. Ingrid gave him a sword instead.

"Fine." Alastor agreed. He and Ingrid ran at the trio like they had fought together all their lives. Vadik joined Hiccup and Astrid and watched proudly.

"They grow up so fast." Hiccup sniffed happily as Ingrid cracked Snorre's jaw and Alastor stole Arne's helmet, planting it on his head and cutting his belt in two. Arne fell flat on his face, tripping on his trousers. Astrid was bouncing on the balls of her feet, having taught them everything they knew. Ingrid leant backwards as Rolf attempted to decapitate her, driving the the butt of her axe into his ribs, effectively winding him. Alastor ducked Arne's swing and shoulder-tackled him, knocking him and Rolf flat. He twisted the blade from Arne's hand, dropping his own to punch him right in the nose. "I really shouldn't be encouraging this, but it's a long time coming, don't you think?"

"Definitely." Astrid agreed as Alastor rolled, coming up with Arne in a headlock. Spike was walking back and forth, wanting to help, but ordered not to. Not that Alastor really needed help. "I always knew he had it in him, I'm so happy."

"We're horrible people."

"And?"

"I'm a terrible chief."

"That doesn't matter."

"I'm really enjoying this, but their mothers are going to kill me."

"I won't let that happen."

"Ah, my hero!"

"Idiot. Ooh!" She winced and then beamed. "Go on, Ingrid! Al, go for the legs!"

"What's going on? Whoa, did Al just punch that git in the face?"

"That's the second time." Hiccup said. Snotlout snickered.

"Go for the eyes!" He yelled. "Come on, Al, you show him who's boss! Smash him in the face with his own helmet, steal his shoe, they'll never expect that! Al won't get my two, will he?"

"Eh..." Hiccup shook his hand from side to side. Snotlout looked sorry for his boys already. "I'm sure we can sort that out though." He whistled sharply and his two children danced out of the combat as quickly as they got into it. Ingrid had a bruise on her jawline, but the state of Rolf and Snorre was a hundred times worse. Arne was still on the floor, gasping for breath. Alastor, the little pickpocket, had not only swiped his helmet, but his money and dagger too. He was now counting the coins. "Feeling better?" Hiccup grinned, gripping Alastor's shoulder.

"I feel so much... _lighter_."

"Revenge." Ingrid said knowingly. "It's great, isn't it?"

"Yeah. Want to go and get a pie?" Spike squawked. "And some chicken for Spike, I can't leave him out." The helmet slid down over his eyes and he pushed it up with the tip of his new dagger.

"Oh, while you're up there, can you put an order in to Trader Johan for me? Two more jars of spikenard."

"Spikenard?" Ingrid repeated. "That's a bit flowery for the chief, Dad."

"It's calming. Now go! And if you see Fishlegs, send him down, will you?" The pair ran off, Vadik chasing after them. "How cool was that? We should hypnotise everyone!"

"No." Astrid warned. "Don't get any ideas."

"Too late!"

"It's good Al's got his own back now, but we need to make sure he doesn't go off the rails. If this makes him a Thor Bonecrusher, I will take your leg."

"I have a spare."

"No. That one." She pointed at the one still attached.

"You've been saying that for years though."

"We all have." Snotlout shrugged. "Doesn't mean we won't though. What are we going to do about those clowns?" He nodded at the three friends on the floor, all in varying degrees of pain. "How we can going to explain that to their parents?"

"Uh, freak training accident? Justice?" Hiccup hunched his shoulders. "We'll come to that bridge when we get there. For now, I need you to make sure my two stay out of trouble." Snotlout nodded and left. "Well, tidy up time, I suppose. I shall treasure those memories forever."

"We really are horrible people."

"Meh. It's fun." Hiccup laughed, swinging an arm around her waist. "Let's be horrible together."

"Agreed."


	14. Chapter 14

The return of Alastor's voice bolstered his confidence. As did the state of Arne's face. But he had promised his parents he wouldn't fight anymore, because it wasn't really his thing. "Ingrid's better at senseless violence than I am, I think I'll stick to my books from now on. Is that OK?"

"Now, I may have to think about that..." Hiccup mused. Astrid elbowed him harshly. "Yep." He wheezed. "Definitely OK." Alastor smiled. "You go and have fun now, go... fight for dragon rights or something, I don't know. Be a bard." Hiccup shrugged, deflecting his wife's punch. "Ha! Ow!" Astrid had flicked him in the ear instead. "Al, don't get married. It's not even an occupational hazard, it's just _mean_." Astrid rolled her eyes.

"Don't listen to your father. He's a prat."

"Rude. Don't laugh! Ooh, you're just as bad as your sister. Get out." Alastor left his parents to bicker, finding Spike tormenting Stormfly. The older female was _not_ pleased, billowing flames and barbs.

"Hey!" Alastor darted between the two, staying out of their blindspots. "Easy, Stormfly." He soothed, palm against her nose. "Spike, stop being a pain." Spike seemed to smile, giving his rider a very affectionate and slobbery lick. "Yeah, that's just... just grand. Thanks, bud." Stormfly chirped and Toothless bounded around the corner. He bumbled low across the ground, ready to play. Alastor climbed into the saddle, leaving the two best friends to chase each other. Spike whined, wanting to play too. "Come on, Spike. We've got to find Aloe. I'll get you some chicken." He bribed. Spike brightened and took off at a run.

Aloe was at their Haddock grandparents, her blue and yellow Terror, Bob, draped around her shoulders as she impersonated a rich traveller woman, stalking across the table and babbling with a posh tone. The woman had spoken another language and, upon finding this, left in a huff quite quickly. Stoick was laughing, rising briskly to greeet his grandson. "Al!" Aloe beamed. Bob scrambled from her shoulders and onto Stoick's as she sprinted across the table and jumped straight into his arms. "Yay! Hello, Al!"

"Hello." Aloe gasped, small hands clapping over her mouth. Alastor grinned.

"You can talk properly now! How? Show me!" Her little fingers opened his mouth inspectingly. Alastor sent his grandfather a 'help' look, making Stoick chuckle.

"Aloe, let him speak."

"Magic." She concluded, wiping her hands on her brother's shirt.

"No. Gothi."

"Ah." Stoick nodded. "About time. I was wondering what had brought on that little spat with what's-his-name. I saw him earlier-" Valka walked in with a stack of laundry. Stoick didn't finish his sentence, giving a thumbs-up instead. "Val. Our grandson has his voice back."

"Really? That's brilliant! Well done, Al. Say something."

"Val!"

"No, it's OK."

"Sometimes I forgot what he sounded like. I bet he'll be like Hiccup now- won't ever shut up."

"I'll be good." Alastor promised.

* * *

"So, what you're telling me is that-" Ingrid ducked his slash and jabbed at his face in retaliation, "-your dad is the biggest-" She parried and pinched his nose, "-joke in the Archipelago?"

"That's not what I said." Vadik flipped his knife from his belt and tried to catch her off guard. She saw it coming from a mile off, grabbing his wrist and flipping him over her shoulder. "It's just that he has idiotic tendencies and doesn't always listen to me."

"Sounds like all dads then."

"Yeah, but your dad isn't classified as _deranged_."

"No, but I have heard he's probably the craziest chief Berk has ever had. And to think I'm next." She sighed dreamily. Vadik pulled himself into a sitting position.

"Still set on that?"

"Problem?"

"No, of course not." She offered her hand and yanked him to his feet. Vadik set about dusting himself down. "It's just a bit unusual, that's all. Which fits perfectly with you and your... unique-ness? Is that a word?" She shrugged her shoulders, humming a 'I-don't-know' sound. "What's your dad done about it?" Still didn't know. "Round two?" He asked, retrieving his blades.

"Loser has to buy lunch? I'm starving."

"You're always starving. I'm surprised you're not the size of a house, the amount you eat. Then again, you're generally rushing around and training like crazy, so you burn off all that... Whoa!" He ducked her wild axe swing. "I wasn't ready!"

"An attacker can strike at any time! You must always be ready!" She charged him. Vadik rolled to one side, snatching up a shield and taking a defensive stance, sword in hand.

"I've just noticed you're left-handed." She ignored this comment, darting forward once more. He deflected the axe with the shield, raising his other arm to block her attempted stab against his forearm. Ingrid dropped back suddenly, over-balancing him. She tugged sharply on his shield, kicking his feet from under him. He landed on his front with a heavy 'oof'. "Ow." He groaned, winded. Ingrid hooked her foot under him and rolled him onto his back.

"Dead." She declared, axe blade at his throat. "I win."

"You always win. You fight dirty."

"I do not."

"You can though."

"Well, that's what you get for fighting the Jorgenson boys." She reached down to haul him up, only to bodily throw him, discarding her axe and pouncing, pinning him to the floor with his arms behind his back. "Never let your guard down."

"Got it." He managed. "Can I breathe now?"

"No. You're dead. Again. You shouldn't be breathing." She let go. Vadik collapsed against the sanded floor, trying to catch his breath. Ingrid poked him in the leg with the sharp point of her sword. "Get up and fight me."

"I need a break."

"You don't get breaks in real combat."

"I know that. How about we get lunch now?"

"Lunchtime." She agreed, sheathing her sword. "Come on, Dusty, you're buying." Vadik pushed himself up with a groan of complaint. Ingrid carried on walking. Vadik picked up his sword as quietly as he could, sneaking towards her on light feet with the weapon above his head. She reacted faster than he ever could, spinning and locking her arm around his, kneeing him in the stomach and disarming him in one fluid movement. "Dead." She said again, sword aimed at his heart. She flipped the blade, grinning victoriously. "You won't sneak attack me, Vadik. Chop chop now, the food isn't going to buy itself."

"Ingrid, I think someone's calling you."

"Not going to trick me."

"No, I'm being serious." Ingrid opened her mouth to argue when she heard it too. Looking up, she saw Alastor haphazardly flying on Spike. Aloe must have been with him, as she was calling her sister's name.

Spike landed sloppily, something he had never done. Alastor dropped down, panicked.

"What's the matter?"

"Mum and Dad... they... look..." He thrust a rumpled bit of paper in her hands. "What are we going to d-do?" His hands clamped over his mouth. Ingrid scanned the letter furiously, hands trembling. She rounded on Vadik, eyes blazing like the fire of a thousand suns.

"Did you know about this?" She demanded, shaking the paper in his face. Vadik struggled to get it for a moment. He didn't get the chance to read it as she stomped her foot. "Your dad has taken our parents!" Ingrid raged.

"But... how?" Aloe's bottom lip quivered. "Mummy and Daddy can fight Dagur easy-peasy."

"Oh no..." Vadik reached his father's signature. There was a little note for him afterwards. "'Vadik'," He read, "'you've until sunset to come home or I shall no longer consider you my son.' He... he doesn't mean that, does he?"

"You had no idea he was going to do this?"

"As clueless as I was about the marriage thing. What do we do?"

"The village is going mad." Alastor told her. "Rangvald and Bjorn Junior are trying to calm them, the riders too, but Dagur's... someone said Dagur's really pushed his luck this time, crossed the line."

"There you are!" The children looked round. Stoick was approaching them, just as ferocious as his eldest granddaughter. "What's going on? The village is going crazy! Has Hiccup done one of his Hiccup things again?"

"No, Grampa Stoick." Ingrid said through gritted teeth. She snatched the letter back and shoved it at him. "Dagur took them."

"WHAT?" Stoick roared. "YOU!" He bore down on Vadik.

"Wait!" Alastor jumped in, holding his hands up. "Vadik didn't know! Dagur doesn't tell him anything! Please put the sword away, let's just figure out what we're going to do, OK?"

"We've got to my son and your mother back!" Stoick fumed. "Why would Dagur take them both?"

"He hates Dad and he can use Mum to strike back at Dad." Ingrid answered.

"Well, for your sake, I hope you come up with a plan quickly."

"Why?"

"With Hiccup gone and you being old enough, you are now acting chief." Alastor startled. "Or you, Ingrid, I don't know what Hiccup's done about this chief business."

"But... but..." Alastor pulled on his hair. "Oh no..."

"It'll be alright, Al, let me handle this. Vadik, is there anyway to get on your father's island without him knowing about it?"

"Uh... no. I remember him showing me all over the island, above and below. Unless you've got some really stealthy Whispering Deaths, there's no way onto the island." He wrung his hands. Stoick read the letter.

"Boy." He said. "Your father is a scoundrel. But he may be expecting you back by sunset, which can give us an advantage. If you go by ship, we can sneak the dragon riders below deck."

"Will we have time though?" Alastor worried.

"We'll have the dragons pull it as far as they can." Ingrid added. "We should go too."

"No!" Aloe chimed in fiercely. "Mummy and Daddy will get away, you watch!"

"But Aloe-"

"They will! They always beat Dagur!" When her siblings started to speak, she put her hands over her ears, chanting, "They will, they will, they will!"

"If Vadik goes back, Dagur will kill him. You're tainted." Alastor explained. "You've been with us. But if Vadik doesn't go back, Mum and Dad will-"

"They will, they will, they will!"


	15. Chapter 15

The Haddock children stood on the stage, a hoard of angry Vikings screaming and shouting before them, surging over each other to try and get their questions answered. Ingrid was doing her best to calm them like her father would, but with Hiccup and Astrid gone, it was anarchy. She could feel her temper boiling under the surface. Alastor stood with Aloe behind her, his hands on her shoulders. The youngest Haddock was chewing her fingernails anxiously, hiding behind her hair. Alastor knelt to look her in the eye.

"Aloe, just stay put, OK? I'm going to help Ingrid." His lttle sister nodded. Alastor gently pulled her fingers from her mouth and moved forward to stand next to Ingrid. He raised his hands, motioning for silence as he had seen his father do a hundred times. Nothing worked. Ingrid's anger exploded.

"SHUT IT!" She yelled. A wave crashed over the Berkians, stunned quiet falling across them. Ingrid glared at them all. "HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS IF YOU DON'T GIVE ME A CHANCE, YOU STUPID MUTTONHEADS! DON'T START!" She added furiously, rounding on her brother. Alastor lowered his hand, lacing his fingers. "YOU THERE!" Ingrid jabbed a finger angrily at Rangvald. "GET ME MY AXE!" Rangvald, knowing better than to argue, rushed off. "LISTEN TO ME! MUM AND DAD WILL BE FINE, THEY CAN FIGHT DAGUR IN THEIR SLEEP! YOU ALL HOLLERING AT ME ISN'T GOING TO HELP THOUGH!"

"We're not _hollering_ at you!" Hackett argued. "We're talking to him!" He pointed a meaty finger at Alastor. "He's the heir, he's the acting chief." Ingrid coloured furiously, clenching her fists.

"FOR THE RECORD, THERE IS A CHANCE I COULD TAKE OVER! FOR THE TIME BEING, WE ARE BOTH ACTING CHIEFS! IF ANYONE HAS A PROBLEM WITH THAT, TAKE IT UP WITH MY AXE! TO GET MUM AND DAD BACK, I NEED YOU ALL TO SHUT UP FOR FIVE MINUTES!"

"Why is he still here?" Bjorn Senior demanded, spotting Vadik to the side of the stage. "He probably helped Dagur get them!"

"He didn't!" Alastor insisted. "Vadik's spent the week with us, he had no contact with Dagur!"

"This could all be a set-up! They could have planned it from the start! Didn't think of that, did you, boy?" Hackett snarled. Alastor hesitated. "Where's Stoick? Neither of you are fit to be acting chief! STO-ICK, STO-ICK, STO-ICK!" He chanted, kick-starting the others demands. Stoick marched onto stage, as crimson with fury as his granddaughter. Aloe squeaked and hurried to Alastor's side, clinging to his arm. The old chief tilted his chin up and everyone silenced. Rangvald returned with Ingrid's axe, saw Stoick and stopped dead in his tracks.

"What did I miss?" He asked no-one in particular. Ingrid thrust her hand out and he sheepishly passed over her weapon.

Stoick put a hand on the shoulders of both the acting chiefs.

"How dare you doubt my grandchildren?" He snarled. "They're young, there is still a lot to learn, so let them learn." He looked down at the pair of them. "What have you decided?" He asked quietly. "There is no time to get Vadik home. Even by dragon, he will be pushed for time."

"Unless we took Toothless."

"We've never flown him that fast though." Ingrid pointed out, her knuckles white on the handle of her axe. "This is stupid! Why did Dagur take them both? I say we go over there and smack him so hard in the face, his brain will come out his ears!"

"Easy." Stoick said softly.

"What if we sent a Terror?" Alastor suggested.

"Saying what?" Aloe inquired.

"Uh... I don't know..."

"Give our parents back or your brain will come out your ears." Ingrid decided curtly.

"No, we can't. We need something Dagur wants, something he's always wanted..."

"Victory over Dad. Toothless. Revenge. Repeat."

"He wants me." Vadik had joined them, wincing as the Berkians booed him. "If I hadn't sided with you all, he wouldn't have taken your parents. I'm sorry."

"This isn't your fault." Alastor assured. "Dagur's to blame. You weren't in on any of his plans, I don't think you've ever been. But what can you do to change that? Dagur has only ever trusted himself. Which just gave me an idea!" Alastor dragon-called. Spike flew low over the crowd, making many of them duck. He landed on the stage proudly, squawking happily.

"Wait, what are you doing?"

"I've just thought of something else that Dagur's wanted for a long time."

"If you say Dragon-Eye-"

"No. Not that. Handle them, I'll be back in a bit." Alastor swung up into the saddle. Spike jumped up.

"Where's he going?" Hackett frowned.

"Business." Ingrid decided.

"Stoick, what do we do?"

"Why don't you ask our acting chieftess that?"

"You're not really accepting this, are you? What about our traditions?"

"I'm sure the Haddocks have broken more than a few traditions." Stoick said gravelly. "Look at my son, for example."

"But a _girl_ chief? That's insane!"

"Know what else is insane?" Ingrid growled. "Insulting me. You'd better start running or I'm going to hack your legs off!"

"Ingrid, calm down." Stoick advised. "I understand you're upset and frustrated, but a chief protects his or her own, remember that. You do not take their legs off no matter how annoying they are." Stoick frowned at Hackett. They saw Spike fly overhead. "Snotlout!"

"Yes, sir?"

"Go and find out what that child is doing!" Snotlout bowed his head, summoning Hookfang and chasing after his nephew. "Ingrid. Can I trust you to handle things here?" Ingrid fumed, not meeting his gaze.

"Yes." She eventually muttered, shoulders slumping. Stoick leant down to whisper something in her ear.

"If it helps, just imagine everyone in their underwear. That's what your dad does when they get on his nerves." Ingrid snorted with laughter. Stoick smiled and clapped her on the shoulder. "Attagirl. Aloe, with me."

"So what's the plan, _chieftess_?" Hackett spat.

"The plan, _villager_ , is to get you to shut up for five minutes, wait for my brother's return and pray that my parents can get themselves out of any trouble, as they have done countless times over the years."

"That's hardly a plan!"

"No, it's not." Ingrid agreed. "It's the beginning of a plan, one that will work very well. Any objections, and we will personally have disagreements. Is that clear?" Hackett glowered. "It appears your brain isn't the only thing that doesn't work. I said, _is that clear_?" He nodded, furious with himself. "Excellent. Everyone is to return to their homes until further instruction! Your chief and his wife will be home safely soon!" Grumbles broke out and Vikings stomped off, in a foul mood. Ingrid took a deep breath and hurled her axe at the nearest totem. Vadik approached carefully. "What is so hard to understand, do they really not get that this is hard enough without them having tantrums?"

"You haven't trained as a chief yet." Vadik said. "Once you've trained up a bit, you'll get the hang of this."

"What if they're right though? What if I'm not fit to be chief? You saw Al, he could talk to them and they listened."

"Because he's a boy. That's what is expected after all, male heirs are traditional, have been for generations. Something like this is a big change to tradition, it'll take some getting used to, that's all." Ingrid snatched her axe from the totem, wooden splinters showering over the stage. "Let's get you to the arena, get you calmed down a bit before anything else, OK?"

"I'd rather put my axe in Hackett's face, but _fine_."

"Ingrid!" They looked up as Alastor descended on his dragon. "Ingrid, we may have a bit of a problem."

"Why? Is that thing you were looking for not where it should be?"

"No. This arrived. And there's a fleet of Berserker ships off the north coast." Ingrid swore colourfully, snatching the arrow from her brother. She unravelled the message.

 _Time's up. Vadik, if you are reading this, you are no longer welcome here. Say goodbye to your precious chief and his oh-so-amazing wife. I'll be at Berk to assume my new role as chief._

 _Dagur._


	16. Chapter 16

**Madcup**

* * *

"Rise and shine, Hiccup." Dagur said in a sing-song voice. "Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey." Hiccup groaned and opened his eyes blearily. "Come on, brother, take it all in." It took a moment for Hiccup to regain his bearings, the ache in his arms dribbling down to his chest and back. His hands were tied above his head with rope strung from the ceiling. His body was trapped against a wooden stake, ropes around his stomach and ankles, his feet barely reaching the floor. He could make out very little of the large room they were in, a single torch in Dagur's hand. Opposite him, was another figure imprisoned similarly to him. "I thought you two could have some quality time," Dagur taunted, shining his light on Astrid, "before sunrise tomorrow."

"What's happening sunrise tomorrow?"

"Your funeral of course." Dagur sneered. "It's going to be _glorious_ , I've waited _years_ for it!"

"Dagur, if you hurt him-" Astrid began furiously. Dagur swung the torch around, holding it unbearably close to her face.

"Hey!" Hiccup protested, straining against the bindings. "You've got me, Dagur, leave her alone!"

"Ah, you're final wish. I suppose as long as you're alive, she's safe then. We'll have to see what she has to say for herself after she sets your ship alight tomorrow though. What do you say, Astrid? Care to be my wife? I reckon I could get one or two decent sons out of you before you're past it."

" _Excuse me_?" Astrid glowered. "If I'm going to be setting a ship on fire, it'll be _your_ ship! And there is no way I'm going to be your skivvy!" She swore colourfully at him. Dagur raised his hand.

"Dagur." Hiccup said firmly.

"Afterwards." He snarled. He stomped out, leaving them in semi-darkness.

"Hiccup?"

"I won't let him get you."

"I'm not worried about that. How are we going to get out of here?" When he said nothing, Astrid felt her heart sink. After kicking one of the Berserkers in the groin, she had been practically cocooned in rope up to her waist. Her hands were bound together in material under the bonds; no matter what she tried, she couldn't get them free. Hiccup had more of a chance. "Hiccup, please tell me you're not giving up."

"I... I don't know what to do..."

"Think. You've _always_ got a plan. I know I say they're generally stupid and reckless, but that's a Hiccup-thing. Everyone knows your plans are... second best to mine, obviously." He gave a small laugh. "Unfortunately, I'm a bit ensnared at the moment. I need you to cut me free so I can snap Dagur's neck." She could see his eyes faintly across from her, watching her sadly. "You _are_ giving up! Dammit, Hiccup, this isn't you!" She reprimanded harshly. He bowed his head. "Did you give up when you found Toothless, when the Red Death attacked, when you lost your foot, when Drago started his dragon army or when Dagur pulled scheme after scheme to get his ridiculous revenge? No! Why is now so different?" He remained silent. "Answer me!" She demanded hotly.

"Because whatever I do will come back to hurt you and the kids!" He shot back.

"And you're going to let that happen, are you?"

"I can't... I can't think around it, just- ugh..." He shook his head.

"Hiccup, I _know_ you can get us out of here. Look at all the trouble we've caused over the years, look how well you managed that."

"I don't manage." He admitted quietly.

"I know." Astrid said. Hiccup looked up, startled. "Hiccup, you're my _husband_. Do you really think I wouldn't notice? You've been keeping it bottled for _years_. When Dagur took you that time, you never recovered. Not in your head or your heart. You changed, but you did your best to stay _you_ , even if it drove you crazy."

"Astrid, I... I don't like the... that side of me, I can't... what if you got hurt because of me? I'd never-"

"Hiccup, if I got hurt because of you, you'd know about it." He hummed mildly in agreement. "Dagur _broke_ you. He doesn't know that, but I do. This other side of you, it's just as Berserk as he is, maybe even more so."

"I'm not a Berserk."

"No. You're a Hooligan. You're the Dragon Conquerer, son of Stoick the Vast and Valka the crazy, feral dragon lady, you trained a _Night Fury_ , you're the chief of one of the most feared dragon communities in all of the Archipelago and why? Because _you_ trained us, _you_ taught us that we could live in peace, _you_ showed us how to be better. Because of _you_ , Berk is a thousand times better than it ever was, _stronger_. Don't let all your hardwork go to waste. Think about the kids, _our_ kids. With you gone, Dagur will be after them. Think about what he'll do to them. Ingrid's nearly a woman now, he'll _use_ her. Alastor won't fight him, not if Dagur puts Aloe's life in the balance, you know that. He'll force Alastor to train more dragons for him, he won't care how else they're treated as long as he gets what he wants."

"No." Hiccup growled. "No, they're _our_ kids, we've got to get back to them."

"Then stop being Nice Hiccup. I want that crazy bastard from the other side." He glared at her. Astrid smiled to herself. Her plan was working; all she needed now was to make him _really_ mad. "Oh, I'm shaking in my boots." She said sarcastically. "If you can't scare me, how are you going to scare the Berserkers? They won't take you seriously, they never really did. You were never really a fighter, they counted on that, too weedy, too nerdy, too much of a soft-hearted muttonhead to ever do any _real_ damage. To them, you've _always_ been a little _hiccup_." His fists clenched. Astrid's heart was smacking against her ribs. "Hackett was right. You _are_ just a disappointment. You're nothing without the dragons, you won't win a fight against a five year old girl, let alone _Dagur the Deranged_." He swore under his breath. "Big words for such a little man. What's the matter, _Hiccup_? Did I hurt your feewings? Ah, poor baby boo," She cooed, "does Bubba need his mummy? She'll fight for you, she'll do better than you ever would." He got his feet free, twisting and snapping the ropes around his waist. Astrid mentally high-fived herself as he slid backwards up the stake, pulling himself up to sit on the top of it. Within seconds, he had worked his hands free and jumped down, untying her. "I'm very impres- _mm_!" Hiccup didn't let her speak, crushing her to him the moment she was free, kissing her as though this really was his last day. She couldn't breathe, her torso mushed to his as tightly as his lips were to hers, her hands trapped and splayed across his chest, his pressed firmly against her back.

She felt light-headed when he finally pulled away. "-sed..." She finished in a small voice.

"You should wind me up more often." He told her. Astrid managed a tiny nod. He took her hand. "Let's get out of here."

"OK." She squeaked. He smirked, pulling her towards the exit. Two guards stood either side of the doorway. Hiccup could hear their voices through the barred window. He knocked loudly and asked if their mothers missed him. "Don't give me that look." He said under his breath to his wife. "I'd rather throw myself off Deadman's Peak than go with anyone else."

"I'd throw you off myself." Astrid muttered as the door swung open. They pounced as one, tackling a guard each. Astrid disarmed her one of his axe and clonked him about the head with the hilt knocking him out cold. Hiccup swiped the sword of the other from its holster and danced around him expertly, gouging slashes on armour and flesh alike until he wore down his opponent, kicking him against the wall with a sickening crunch of bone. Astrid looked at him, _really_ looked at him. He held himself differently, held his weapon without hesitation, the emerald of his eyes icy and determined, yet... she could see something else, something _darker_. He grabbed her hand again and set off at a run. They came across more guards and he flew at them like a man possessed. Astrid relished in beating them up and knocking them out; _he_ relished in humiliating and scarring them before he took them out with some wicked method that left them severely injured. This was who he was, unhinged, unbottled, this _other side_. She had unlocked this maniac, but he still kept coming back to her, making sure she was there with him, unhurt and ready to fight some more. "Hiccup, I know you said you didn't like this side of you, but Thor _above_!" He shot her a quizzical look, shook his head and carried on running.

They reached the top, finding themselves in the ruins of the old Berserker compound.

"Careful." He warned. The ground was unstable. An arrow narrowly missed her head. "Berserkers are up there." He told her. His eyes flicked to and fro, devising a path. "How much do you weigh?"

"What kind of question is that?"

"The kind of question that involves me not falling over and plummeting to our death."

"You are _not_ carrying me. Which way are we going?"

"Fine. This way." A score of arrows rained down. Hiccup knocked some aside with his blade, hopping from slab to slab, swinging on rusted metal bars across to the next part. Astrid followed closely, amazed as his sudden agility. It was like all his time with her had given him some of her skills. Did that mean she had any Hiccup-skills? Oh gods... she probably had some really obscure Hiccup-skill, like making the best apple pie she had ever tasted or being able to pull weird faces that she was pretty sure weren't humanly possible.

The ground slipped beneath her feet. Hiccup's arm shot out and looped about her waist, pulling her to the edge. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, just mistimed my footing." She looked up. "Are we climbing now? And where did you get those arrows?"

"Caught them." He handed her two. "We _are_ climbing now." He nodded. His sword was in his belt. Astrid tucked her new axe away, embedding the arrowheads in the rockface. Hiccup copied and they climbed together. Strangely, no more arrows fell at them.

"Why have they stopped shooting?"

"I think they're waiting for us to come up."

"Oh, an ambush. Wonderful. I always wanted to be a pincushion!" She hissed.

"Hey, you wanted a plan, this is the plan. Not the pincushion part though." He shook his head. "You'd be much better off as a throw."

"I can still kick you down."

"I know." He grinned devilishly. "But you won't."

"And what makes you sure?"

"Because you love this crazy bastard, remember?"

Hiccup rushed through the defense lines, taking down each man that got in his way, knocking them out cold, shoving them over, starting fights between them all. He darted through to rejoin Astrid, pulling her out as a free-for-all broke out amongst the Berserkers. "There are wild dragons this way." He offered her his arm and she took it, the wildness in his eyes calming. They simply walked from the brawl as though this was one of the many walks along the beach, acquired a Nadder and took off back to Berk. Astrid was still buzzing. Hiccup sat behind her, arms around her waist, face pressed against her neck. At first, she thought he was dozing, but he was simply enjoying her company.

"You confuse me."

"I confuse everyone."

"You've got that right. Let's go home and kick Dagur's butt."

"Ooh, please."


	17. Chapter 17

**To Sofia- Thank you! I added that Aloe bit in because I loved the idea of it :D**

 **To all- I apologise in advance if you're squeamish.**

* * *

"BERK!" Dagur screamed. "LISTEN TO ME!" Some faces turned towards him, giving him nothing more than a passing glance. Dagur stomped his foot. "YOUR CHIEF IS DEAD!" That pulled a few up short. "MY MEN HAVE SENT HIM OUT ON HIS FUNERAL SHIP THIS VERY MORNING! HIS WIFE WILL SOON JOIN HIM!"

"Hey!" The Haddock children had pushed through the crowds. Ingrid glared up at Dagur, hands on her hips. "What's this crap about our parents being dead? Be serious! You couldn't kill a fly! They're both smarter than you and they can _both_ kick your ass!"

"Have you ever known your dear old dad to survive fire without his beloved Night Fury?"

"I've known my dear old dad to survive _all_ your stupid plans." Alastor retorted sharply. "What have you _really_ done with them?" Dagur said nothing, eyeing Alastor with a wicked smile. Ingrid stood before her brother, withdrawing her axe from across her back. "They're not dead!" Alastor insisted, moving to her side instead. "And as co-acting chief, we order you to leave Berk and never return! You've one minute to get your sorry ass off our island!" Dagur cackled loudly, slapping his knee absurdly, doubling over. Then he stopped just as suddenly. Aloe frowned at him.

"You are fat and ugly!" She said fiercely. "You stupid, disgusting half-troll!" Her bewildered siblings didn't know how to react to this. Aloe snatched up a stone and threw it at Dagur, hitting him in the chest. "That's for stealing Mummy and Daddy!" She cried furiously. "Go away!" Dagur took a second to get over his surprise as well, that old smirk returning.

"And you think you can make me? Oh, precious thoughts!"

"They might not be able to, but we can!" Cheers sprung up.

" _WHAT_?" Dagur howled. He had to scurry to one side save being squashed by a Nadder. "HOW? YOU SHOULD BE DEAD, BURNT ALIVE!"

"WELL THAT DIDN'T QUITE WORK, WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?" Hiccup cleared his throat, dropping from the dragon. "Dagur, I challenge you." Dagur snorted. Astrid handed him a Nadder spine calmly and he hurled it with surprising velocity at Dagur's head. The Berserker chief ducked at the last second. "Dagur." Hiccup said carefully, as if speaking to a very ignorant child. "I, Hiccup Haddock the Third, challenge you, Dagur the Deranged, to rights of chiefdom over your tribe." Dagur stomped his feet like a toddler having a tantrum.

"Give it up, Hiccup! Just once, give up! You and your measly lot have no chance against the full might of the Berserker armada!" Dagur cackled, suddenly regaining his swagger, waving his long sword about and gaining a thunderous war cry from his army. Hiccup leant to the side to peer around his rival, seeing the Berserkers forming up on the coast.

"Huh." He said. "I thought something smelt funny."

"Prepare!" Dagur screamed. "To fight!"

"OK. Kids, go with your mother." He passed Aloe up first, stepping aside to let his eldest two climb abroad the new Nadder.

"Dad, this is crazy. Can't you... I don't know, talk this out?" Alastor asked despairingly.

"I think we're past talking now, Al." Hiccup looked up at his wife, sharing a nod that said a thousand words. Astrid ushered the Nadder into the sky, ordering the other Berkians back.

Hiccup stood alone, his Berkians standing a distance away, unarmed, under his initial orders not to do anything, not to fight. Dagur cracked up, laughter bursting forth, wild and uncontrolled.

" _You_? Challenge _me_?" He marveled again, taunting. "You will kiss these boots!" Dagur raised his foot and pointed, just to make sure Hiccup knew which boots he would supposedly be kissing. Hiccup drew a sword from his belt. He and Astrid had made a quick pit stop; this wasn't the sword he had stolen earlier, but simply one of his own creation, better balanced and Gronckle Iron. He had been thinking this through ever since Vadik started to stay with them and this was the only other option that suited him- Ingrid would stay here, safe, and marry when she wanted to marry, rather than marry Dagur's son and, if he won, he would gain control of the Berserker tribe. "Actually," Dagur mused, "you do know that when a chief challenges a chief, it's to the death, right?"

"Yup."

"Excellent!"

"Dad, don't do this!" Ingrid cried. She broke through the crowd, her siblings and mother behind her. "Dad! You can send us off as many times as you like, but we're not leaving you to this!"

"Stay there, Ingrid." Hiccup said firmly.

"Dad!" Aloe was in tears. Astrid pulled her three children back, holding them in her arms. Hiccup's eyes lingered on hers for a brief second and then he was facing Dagur again, head back and shoulders set in defiance.

"Come on then, Hiccup! Let this be over with!" Dagur lunged forward. Hiccup walked forward calmly, Dagur roaring in challenge. Hiccup ducked the first attack easily, swinging his sword arm up and slashing down before Dagur could regain balance. He carved a long, deep gash across Dagur's back and while he arched his spine and screamed in agony, Hiccup cut his hamstrings. Dagur dropped to his knees and Hiccup finished it, stabbing through Dagur's neck.

No-one moved, but Dagur, slumping to the floor with blood gushing from a wide smile in his throat. Hiccup calmly turned to the armada, blade scarlet almost to the hilt. Some drew their swords.

"Yield!" Hiccup ordered. A few knelt. The rest bellowed challenges.

"We stand with Vadik!" One bellowed. Hiccup raised his sword and set the bloodstained tip at Dagur's son's throat. Vadik was staring at him, tides of emotion crashing across his features.

"I'll explain everything later, I'm sorry." He whispered. Vadik closed his eyes, tears falling down his pale cheeks. Hiccup redirected his attention to the Berserkers. "This bastard, you mean?" Shock rumbled through the hundreds massed before him. "Oh, didn't Dagur tell you? There was no _wife_. No death in childbirth."

"You lie!"

"Do I?" Hiccup smirked. "I know the mother personally." He turned to his Berkians. Ada stepped forward sheepishly, running her hands over her auburn braid with tears in her blue eyes. Vadik looked ready to drop. Hiccup held his right hand out to her and she stumbled to his side. "Ever seen this woman before?" He asked the Berserkers. Mutters trembled through their ranks. A handful had, Dagur's closest men.

"Vadik..." Ada's voice quavered almost as much as she was. It was a miracle she still stood. "Hiccup, this isn't what I wanted."

"I know. But I have to settle this. Vadik. Meet your mother." Vadik's eyes snapped open and anger swarmed through him.

"N-no. You're... you're lying!"

"Am I? Roll up your sleeve, Vadik. Show us that birthmark of yours." Ada pulled back her sleeve too, revealing the red splodge on her arm. Vadik sunk to his knees, eyes watering. "Am I still lying?" Hiccup asked him softly, menace deep in his eyes. Vadik shook his bowed head. Hiccup nodded once, satisfied, and faced the Berserkers once more. More were kneeling now, but not enough. "Yield!"

"NEVER!" A small group charged him. Hiccup waved Ada back to safety and met them head on. One slashed at his head, he spun to avoid it, hacking down with his sword and severing the man's sword hand. Blood splattered across his front, he fought on, stabbing under a second's arm so forcefully, his sword rattled on the man's shoulder blades. He yanked that free, crimson liquid spurting from the wound and gargling in the Berserker's throat. He dropped; Hiccup stepped over him and deflected the blade of the third man. A fourth took a jab at his throat; he fell to his knees, whirling his weapon around and forcing the sharp edge through skin and flesh, shuddering across the bones. When the fourth fell, Hiccup jumped up, leant back to evade the third's rebuke and put him a sword point.

"Yield." Hiccup said again. The sword fell from the third's fingers and he knelt, two dead and one dying around him. Hiccup glared at the watching armada. "YIELD!"

One by one, they knelt.

Hiccup marched through their lines, separating them into groups of ten and fifteen. He had them pass their weapons forward to some of the Berk villagers; anyone who tried to attack him became a new reminder as to why they shouldn't.

"What are you going to do with them?" Rangvald asked nervously. Hiccup drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

"Have their armour taken. Get Gobber and his apprentices to melt it all down. I want them bound in their groups. How many ships do we have ready to sail?"

"Near forty."

"A group on each, with escorts. Take them to every tribe but their own."

"Would the other tribes be OK with that?"

"We've already had a meeting about this."

"You _planned_ this?"

"Don't look so surprised, Rangvald. I know what I'm doing."

"I never said that, Hiccup, it just seemed... so... rash." Rangvald looked at him worriedly. Hiccup returned his stare, silently reminding him of the set instructions. "Right away, Hiccup, sorry."

"Don't apologise." Hiccup knelt and cleaned his blade on the grass. Rangvald marched off and started issuing Hiccup's demands. Astrid and the three children made their way over, all marveling at him. Hiccup sheathed his weapon and smiled grimly. "Hello."

"Who are you and what did you do with my father?" Alastor demanded.

"Dad, what did you- what- I don't- how could you-? Dad?" Ingrid stared up at him, in awe and, for once in her life, speechless. Hiccup smoothed her hair back from her forehead.

"I did what I had to."

"What about the Berserkers back on their island?" Astrid pointed out, crossing her arms.

"I've already sent an envoy to them. They're to sign a peace treaty or be moved like this lot here."

"And if they revolt?" Hiccup clenched his jaw.

"We'll cross that bridge if we come to it."

"And Vadik?" Alastor questioned anxiously. Hiccup put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"I need to talk to him."

"You just killed his dad; I don't think he's going to want to listen."

"He doesn't really have any other options though. He's nowhere to go, so I'm hoping he'll come over to his mother's side."

"And if he doesn't?"

"I'll think of something." Hiccup examined his children carefully. Ingrid was staring at the ensuing chaos in complete bewilderment; Alastor was chewing his lip, his attention flicking from the mass of Berserkers to the Berkians to his father and back again; Aloe was hidden behind her mother's legs, clinging to her skirt. "Aloe?"

"Daddy?" Hiccup stepped forward and leant forward to see why she was hiding. "Daddy, you are scary when you are mad." Hiccup hummed. "Don't do that again, Daddy, please."

"I won't if I don't have to." Aloe's bottom lip trembled. Hiccup knelt and held his hand out to her. "I have to keep you all safe, Aloe, even if that does mean being scary sometimes. I promise you though; I'll never let anything hurt you." Aloe sniffled and looked to her mother.

"It's OK, Aloe. Daddy had to do what he did to make sure nothing bad happened to Berk."

"But the bad man is very red now." She sniffled and wiped her eyes on the back of her small hand.

"Hiccup." Astrid pointed. Vadik was tentatively approaching Ada. Hiccup watched carefully. Ada was just as nervous about this meeting.

"You're _really_ my mother?" She showed him the birthmark again. Vadik undid the greaves on his forearm and rolled his sleeve up, displaying the same mark. "What happened?"

"I... Dagur took me, he... Vadik, I don't want to ruin anything, but-" She wrung her hands anxiously. "It wasn't nice, I'll just say that. When you were born, I thought things would be better, but he cast me out, left me for dead in the ocean. Hiccup found me, brought me home. I told him what happened eventually and he's... you were part of his plan. He wanted to get you here as soon as he could, but Dagur kept you away from us, even from the Berserkers. He kept track of how old you were, timed this all. When Dagur had this idea and you turned up, it was Hiccup that kept me away until the right time. I know he was your father, but..." She glanced to Hiccup pleadingly. Hiccup approached. Vadik startled and flinched away from him.

"Vadik. This was the last thing I wanted to do. Dagur would have kept coming back time and time again; he would have done everything he could to get you away from your mother. I'm sorry it had to come to this, but with Dagur out of the way and the Berserkers disbanded, you're free. You can stay here, reunite with Ada. I can understand if you want nothing to do with me and I'll do my best to stay out of your way if that's what you want, but if you or you, Ada, if either of you ever need help with anything, just ask. If not me, Astrid or any of the other riders." Vadik's eyes roamed across the blood soaking Hiccup from head to toe, some of it his father's, some of it the other Berserkers. He looked to the groups that the Berkians were splitting up and taking elsewhere. Some turned back just to swear at him, make threats to Hiccup. They rolled over Hiccup's head, but stabbed straight into Vadik's heart. He was a bastard child. He would be entitled to nothing of his father's nobility or anything that had previously been destined to be his. He looked to Ada again, then back to Hiccup.

"I think I'll stay. I... I don't know about you though. You took me in; you... you all showed me there was more to life than being... like Dad, but... I wasn't expecting this; I don't know... did he ever really love me?"

"Vadik..." Hiccup sighed. "I honestly don't know. I want to say that he did, and say that truthfully, but Dagur's intentions were never always obvious, I never really understood him. Just know that, now you're here, you're always welcome. This is your home now, if that's what you want." Hiccup looked the boy in the eye. "I wished it didn't have to end this way. I'm sorry."

"What do I do now?"

"Make yourself at home. Ada, have you got room for him?"

"Of course I do." Ada smiled, eyes watering. "Come on, Vadik. Let's get you settled and we'll talk, OK?" Vadik looked to what was left of his father, biting the inside of his bottom lip. Hiccup's heart went out to the poor kid, the pain in his eyes beyond all reason. And yet... he looked at Ada as she spoke gently to him, listened to what he had to say; hope was trickling into his features. Dagur had never spoken to him so kindly, never really listened to him. Hiccup had known that feeling growing up. He felt guilty for ruining any chance Vadik had of reconciling with his father, to straighten out their issues, but he was relieved Ada had her son back. Every year that had gone past, every birthday, Snoggletog, she had pleaded with him to raid Dagur's fort, to let her go herself.

"Hey." Astrid touched his cheek gently. "You did the right thing. Just give him time to get his head around it."

"I don't feel like I did the right thing."

"Dagur is gone now. The Berserkers are broken up and you're in charge of them now, so they can't do anything now or ever again. Let Vadik grieve. Let him get to know Ada. Let him take his time to come to terms with life here. For now, we should clean this mess up." Ingrid pushed her way between her parents.

"You have got to teach me what did."

"No."

"Why?"

"Because you're bad enough."

"Can I go see if Vadik is alright then?"

"No." Astrid replied. "You can give him time too. Eesh. We should get you cleaned up first. You smell like rusty metal."

"Thanks, Astrid. Appreciate it." Alastor and Aloe joined them, Alastor balancing his little sister on his hip. "Are you two alright?"

"Aloe's not talking to you until you behave." Alastor relayed. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine."

"Mum's right though. You do smell." Hiccup pulled a face. "Will Vadik be OK?" Alastor peered around his blood-splattered father, seeing the mother and son up on the hill now, nearing Ada's home. Hiccup looked too, then at his wife. Astrid held her hand out.

"Whatever happens, we'll be there for him. If he doesn't want to see you again, Hiccup, don't make a big thing about it."

"I won't, I've already told him that."

"Good. But he's technically family."

"He is?" Ingrid puzzled.

"Well, Fishlegs is my second cousin apparently and he's with Heather who's Dagur's sister and- Hiccup, language!"

"Ooh, she's going to kill me! Dagur or no, he was still her brother."

"I suggest you hide then." Alastor smirked. "Bath and hide. Go! Rinse, lather and repeat!" He kicked playfully at his father's left foot. "Go, go, go!" Ingrid chased her father all the way home. Astrid supervised the tidy-up. "Mum? Dad will be alright, won't he?"

"We'll look after him."

"And Vadik?"

"Of course. He has more family here than he realised. Berk is his home."

* * *

 **I've renamed Crazy Hiccup Hooligan Hiccup, alliteration and all :D**


	18. Chapter 18

Hiccup, like last time, suffered from insomnia. This didn't stop him from working constantly. He worked more to take his mind off things, that's what he had always done. Astrid was the only one that could pull him out of it, at least long enough for him to eat and wash. She sat to one side while he was in the tub, washing his hair. "Hiccup, I need you to listen to me. For arguement's sake, what would Dagur have done if you hadn't killed him?"

"I don't know."

"Well, I'm pretty sure we can hazard a guess as to him taking revenge on the kids, hurting Vadik, raging war on Berk... all the lovely Dagur things. He would have killed every man, woman and child on this island. At least you spared those smart enough to stand down." Hiccup made a face at the water. "You showed more mercy to those scumbags than any of them would to one of us. And after everything Dagur's done, I didn't think he deserved such a quick end. I would have dragged it out, made him regret ever messing with the Haddocks." Hiccup managed a wavering smile. It had been two weeks. Vadik had stayed with Ada and he seemed keen to continue this. He still helped about the village, still talked to the Haddock children. If he saw Hiccup, he went still. He just didn't know what to do. Hiccup had been the key to an easier and happier life, but there was the ever so slight minor setback of the entire destruction of the Berserker tribe and its chief. Dagur's body had been sent off on a small ship to appease the gods. Vadik saw it off, his mother only there to offer what little support she could. Hiccup and Astrid had watched from a distance.

"Do you think it's weird?"

"Mm?"

"No more schemes. No more madness, no more Mr. Night Fury and kissing of the boots and..." Hiccup shook his head. "Suppose it'll be peaceful."

"Until the next whackjob comes around."

"I'll just set Ingrid on them, she'll love that." He looked at her then, bringing to light the yellowing bruise on the right side of his face. Heather had done that, not long after the word had spread. She had been out hunting at the time, returning as they carted Dagur's body off. Fishlegs had done his best to calm her. She had turned up on the Haddock threshold and punched Hiccup straight in the face.

"As much as I hated him, he was still my brother, you muttonhead."

"I deserved that." Hiccup had said. Now, Astrid touched his injured cheek gently, the barest of fingertip glance across the discoloured skin. He still winced. "Astrid, be honest. Did I do the right thing?"

"Yes."

"And you're not saying that just to try and cheer me up?"

"Why would I even try? You're a miserable old git whatever the situation." Hiccup's expression slowly changed into a grumpy one. Astrid smirked. "There's my lil sulk-monster." She cooed playfully, pinching his unhurt cheek. "If you don't believe me, put it this way- Dagur-free. Forever. And not just us- Berk, the Archipelago, dragons of all kinds, the Berserkers, Ada, Vadik... I could go on..." Hiccup sighed. "Would you like me to go on? I could list every single tribe we know, whether we like them or not; the kids, all of the villagers, wild and domesticated dragons; Ada won't have to worry about him ever again, Vadik is free of his madness. This is racking up to some serious good points, Hiccup. So, are you going to do as I say and get some sleep now? You look ready to drop." The shadows beneath his eyes were like bruises themselves, his exhaustion clear in evey aspect of his being. Deadened eyes, slumped shoulders, feeble and sluggish movements and thoughts. Astrid rose and got him a towel to wrap himself in, helping him into her vacated seat. "Get dry, get dressed, get that foot on and get to bed. That's an order." He opened his mouth to say something. "I don't care if you're the chief. I'm your _wife_. My word is _law_."

"Huh. Learn something new everyday."

"Don't start being a smart-ass already. Dry, dressed, foot, bed. Come on, even the twins could get this."

* * *

"Mum, is Dad OK?"

"He'll be alright."

"Ooh, is he sleeping now?" Astrid nodded. Aloe beamed. She had started talking to Hiccup about three days ago, impressed with his improved behaviour. But even she could see how run-down he was. Alastor had had to explain to her why their father was in such a state.

"So, if he's asleep, who's running the village?" Ingrid asked.

"You two, I guess."

"You're not?"

"Does it look like I want to run the village?"

"Fair point. Are we going to be co-chiefs forever though? No offence when I say this, Al, but you can't have _two_ chiefs, surely?" Astrid shrugged. "Is that a 'I-don't-know' shrug or a 'I-don't-care' shrug?"

"Don't care."

"I'm going to go and ask Grandpa Stoick then. And maybe Gothi too."

"You do that." Astrid nodded. Ingrid squinted at her, not buying this sudden acceptance of her ideas. Alastor nudged her and sent her on her way. "What about you, mister? You definitely OK with all this chief business?" Alastor inclined his head.

"Oh! Oh! Me! I want to be chief too, Mummy! How about we take it in turns?" She asked her brother. "We can do two days each and Ingrid can do three! I am a genius!" Astrid shushed her youngest kindly. Aloe giggled and lowered her voice to a whisper. "That was a good idea, right, Mummy?"

"It was a lovely idea, Aloe."

* * *

"You look like you're on a mission." Vadik caught up with Ingrid, smiling crookedly. "Where are you going?"

"To Gothi."

"Why?" She gave him a pointed look. "Ah. Say no more. Definitely still up for it though, considering the hassle that time?"

"I can manage _hassle_. Blokes like Hackett get on my nerves."

"Oh, they're _old-school_. I think we could do with a little modernisation." She nodded approvingly, starting the long trek up the steps. Vadik fell in behind her. "I bet you can't wait until you've got a fully grown Changewing. How's that egg coming along by the way?"

"Any day now."

"Shouldn't you be with it?"

"Al's keeping an eye on it for me. How are things with your mum?"

"Great!" Vadik grinned. "She makes the _best_ biscuits." His smile dimmed, his step faltering. "Is it bad that I enjoy living here more than I did back home with Dad?"

"Could you really call that home?" Ingrid challenged, stepping carefully around some sleeping Terrors. Vadik sighed, following her steps just as cautiously. "Vadik, I can only imagine what it's like to lose someone you loved, but from what you've told me, Dagur never raised you as his son. He raised you as his heir and warrior, his last card to play. You may have loved him as your dad because you didn't know any different, you didn't know a compassionate father."

"Are you saying he didn't love me?"

"I'm saying I think he loved you for all the wrong reasons. I'm sorry, Vadik. I wish he could have been a better dad to you. Maybe things would have turned out differently if he had been."

"No. Mum's right. And so is Aunt Heather. Dad was never really fit to be a dad. I see that now." Ingrid stopped and looked back. Vadik was trying to put on a smile, but she could see right through, just as transparent as her father's own smiles as of late. His eyes were haunted by the shattered childhood dreams more than grief for his own father. Her expression hardened and he bowed his head miserably. "Thinking over it now, he felt more like a general and I his soldier than father and son. I just wanted to prove to him that I was... good enough to be his son, for him to proud to say that to everyone. Not when he wanted to use me for some cock-and-bull scheme." Standing two steps above him, Ingrid was eye to eye with him. At least, she would have been if he looked up. His fists clenched, shoulders hunched defensively. "Let's go and see Gothi." He muttered, taking a step forward only to take it back almost immediately. Ingrid hadn't moved.

"Don't try and talk yourself around to the way others are thinking. Dagur may not have been the best dad or the best role model, but he was all you had growing up. Don't let people tarnish what memories you had of him, especially good ones. I'm sure there must be some."

"This one time, a Gronckle got into my room and started eating the walls. Dad tried to get rid of it. It only carried him away, we didn't find him for three days. When we did, he was in the Gronckle's nest, surrounded by all these eggs and stuck under a big pile of rocks." Ingrid smiled. Vadik was too.

"See? It wasn't all bad."

"No." Vadik agreed. "I guess it wasn't." They started climbing again. "Ingrid?"

"Mm?"

"Your dad."

"What about him?"

"I heard Fishlegs telling Heather that he was... that he wasn't very well."

"No, he hasn't. Mum says he's been like this before; when he does something irreversible and doesn't know how to handle it, no matter that the benefits outweigh the cons by about three million Gronckles." Vadik smiled weakly. "He's not sleeping. Working like crazy. It's a miracle he remembers that he's human at all. And by miracle, I mean Mum. If it wasn't for her, he'd starve to death and smell as bad as Gobber." Vadik wrinkled his nose. He had encountered a Gobber-Bath-Time and said it had scarred him for life.

"Will he be alright?"

"Hopefully. Mum knocked him out with poppy milk before I left. He didn't know that though, so shush." Vadik nodded. "Are you going to talk to him?"

"I don't know. I want to. Your dad always made me laugh. But... I feel like I'm disrespecting my dad's memory if I do. And I'm worried that, being close to Hiccup again, maybe I won't like it. Maybe things will be different because of what happened. I can't decide if I hate him for what he did or if I should thank him?"

"You could do what your aunt did. Punch him in the face, call him a few names and then carry on being his best buddy."

"Aunt Heather didn't like Dad much, did she?"

"No."

"She won't tell me why though."

"I know it's got something to do with the family that adopted her as a child. Other than that, I'm as clueless as you are." She looked at the stairs before her. "I really can't wait for a full grown dragon of my own."

"Do you think I could get a dragon?"

"Maybe. You're going to need training though."

"Oh really?" Ingrid nodded. "I'm going to need a really good teacher then. Are you free tomorrow lunch?" He smiled cheekily. Ingrid rolled her eyes. "We'll meet at the edge of the woods and get me a dragon."

"And what makes you think I want to help you?"

"What makes you think you _don't_ want to help me?"

"I may be busy."

"Helping me get my dragon." She started to speak. Vadik shushed her. "Won't you just love to spend more time with me?"

"That's debatable."

"If you say so."


	19. Chapter 19

"I've never seen a Changewing egg hatch before." Alastor peered curiously into the deep pool that had dug. "Does it explode with fire or hot acid?" Ingrid rolled her eyes. The water started bubbling. Aloe squealed excitedly, hopping from one foot to the other eagerly. Vadik sprinted up the hill to join them. He hadn't seen any dragon hatch before, he was almost as eager as Alastor. "This is going to be so cool. We'll get to see how the Changewing grows from infancy to adulthood."

"We'll also get to see your head through a wall if you ruin this moment with your nerdness."

"That's not a word." Alastor muttered. "And since when were you so sentimental anyway?"

"It's my dragon. Don't worry, Sneezy, you're still my number one." The Terror cooed approvingly, winding around her neck before perching on her head to watch the water. There was a muffled _boom_ and a burst of multi-coloured light. Alastor was already scribbling in his notebook, ducking away from his older sister. A pink-ish blob scrambled to the surface, shaking the hot water from its soft scales. It was the size of Ingrid's hand, easy, more of a lizard with wings than an actual dragon. It had none of the signature Changewing design, such as the long strings of spikes or the crimson scales. "This is definitely a Changewing, yeah?"

"Look at the wing shape." Alastor told her. "And the claws. This is a Changewing, don't worry." Sneezy dropped to the ground and snuffled at the baby, startling away when it sneezed. "I think you've got a boy, Ingrid."

"What makes you say that?"

"Male Changewings have three sets of ridges on their backs instead of two, like the females. See?" Alastor pointed. Ingrid scooped the little dragon up in her hands, running her thumb over the silky smooth scales. The infant dragon squeaked and vanished. She could feel it against her skin still though, cold and trembling. Alastor made a couple more notes and pocketed his book.

"I thought Changewings scales were tough?"

"Well, the mothers normally defend the babies while they grow, so it might take a while for their adult scales to develop." The dragon shimmered into view again, flickered and yawned. "It seems baby Changewings can't stay camouflaged for long either. Their scales just aren't ready yet."

"What did I say about nerdness?"

"I'm trying to help, _actually_."

"Oooh, Alastor has _attitude_." Vadik snickered. "I'm impressed. Is it sleeping?" He asked. "It is! And it's snoring! I mean, _he's_ snoring. Definitely a boy?" Alastor nodded, gingerly poking his pencil under the Changewing's wing. "What?"

"I'm just checking he's alright."

"Is he?" Ingrid had covered her new dragon with both hands, trying to warm him up.

"I'd say so. Check with Mum and Dad just to be sure though." The Haddocks started towards the door. Vadik hung back. "What's wrong?" Alastor asked kindly. Vadik and Ingrid shared a look. Ingrid smiled reassuringly.

"I'm sure they'll be happy to see you. Come on."

Hiccup was dozing by the fire, leaning against Toothless, when they entered. The Night Fury raised his head interestedly, knocking his rider over. Hiccup just sighed and sat up, rubbing at his face. "Dad, look!" Ingrid grinned. She showed him the sleeping dragon and he smiled wearily.

"If that grows to melt our home down, though, we're going to have issues. Help me up."

"Getting old?" Ingrid teased as Alastor and Aloe pulled their father to his feet. Hiccup ignored this comment, head tilted to one side as he contemplated Vadik. Astrid appeared on the stairs, yanking her hair up in a messy bun. She stopped short when she saw their guest.

"You came back."

"Yeah…" Astrid smiled broadly, jumping the last few stairs to hug Vadik briefly. Vadik wasn't really mad at Astrid or any of the Haddock children. He didn't think he was mad at Hiccup. He was more confused. Looking to the chief now, he wrung his hands anxiously, chewing his lip. He was nothing like the man that had cut down his father and some of the best Berserker warriors that day, there was no rage or delirium in his eyes, no sour look, none of the hostility. He just looked… sad. Pitying, apologetic, a thousand words he wanted to say, none of which would be easy or even possible.

Ingrid huffed.

"Dad, Vadik isn't sure if he should be nice to you or not, all things considering. Vadik, Dad wishes there was another way he could have fixed things without any means of war, regret or collateral damage. However, Vadik is happy living with Ada now. He says she makes the best biscuits ever and that he feels guilty for being happier here with her than he ever was with the man that raised him. He's not sure if he should thank you or smack you, so I told him to do exactly what Aunt Heather did. See that bruise, Vadik?" Ingrid pointed at her father's face. "It's going now, but you should have seen it a few days ago. Maybe you should even it up."

"Ingrid!" Astrid scolded.

"What?"

"No, she's right." Hiccup shook his head. "Mad, but right." He sighed. "Do you honestly like living here, Vadik?" Vadik gave the smallest of nods. "Do you miss your dad?" A shrug. Hiccup looked to his wife for help.

"Vadik." Astrid said kindly. "To put it simply, Hiccup is an idiot. Always has been, always will be. No matter what I say, he loves throwing himself in the deep end. It's amazing he's kept his other limbs so long." Hiccup fumed. Astrid ignored him. "But he always strives to do the right thing, at least in the long run. What he did may have been so… horrific, but he's regretted it every single second of every single day since. He had similar problems growing up; he knows how hard it is to get his father's approval. But Dagur isn't- wasn't like Stoick. It took him fifteen years to accept his son for who he was. How long would Dagur have taken?"

"We won't know." Hiccup croaked. "Vadik, I'm sorry. I've blown any chance of that ever happening for you. I never wanted things to go this way, I… I couldn't see any other way out. I'm sorry." When Vadik said nothing, Hiccup sighed. "I understand if you don't want to accept that. Please just know that I mean it."

"I do." Vadik said quietly. "I do know that you mean it." Hiccup met his gaze, brow furrowed slightly. "I… I said to Ingrid that Dad… was more of a general than a father. I'll miss him, but you've given me a better opportunity now. I know my mother, my aunt, I've got family I didn't even know existed, people here treat me like a normal person rather than a disappointment or a stupid child. Life isn't about training and wars and being the chief or even getting revenge. Being here… I see that now. Maybe I should just punch you in the face and call you a... an assortment of names." He glanced at Aloe, keeping his language in check. "You may have taken my dad from me, but you've given me something I've always wanted. A family, a _real_ family in a _real_ home with _real_ friends. I can't remember a time I was ever happier. Thank you." Hiccup blinked at him, stunned.

"You… don't hate me?"

"Can I punch you in the face?"

"Why does everyone want to punch me in the face? I have a very nice face."

"When no-one has to look at it." Astrid retorted, smirking as he gaped at her. "That was for saying my roast potatoes tasted like dirt."

"I didn't say that… exactly. I just said it was like the dirt hadn't been washed off of them." Astrid glowered. Hiccup shut up. Vadik smiled.

"Are we all good now?" Alastor asked, looking from one to the other.

"I think so." Hiccup raised a brow at Vadik.

"Yeah, me too."

"Excellent." Ingrid grimaced. "Can someone get this dragon off my hand?" She lifted her right hand. Her new dragon had chomped down on her hand with its gums. Alastor tickled him under the chin, catching him in his left. "Ah, that's going to bruise. Thanks, Al." She frowned at the new reptilian addition. "You," She said firmly, "are grounded." Sneezy hopped up on her shoulder and growled for emphasis. "I think I'll call him Snapper."


	20. Chapter 20

**To Iris Patton- Thank you! I shall try and write some more Hiccstrid ^_^**

* * *

"For the time being, both of you are going to be trained as future chiefs. Ingrid, as expected, there are a few... minor disagreements with your potential chiefhood." Ingrid frowned, but nodded. "Uh, Dad is here to make sure I'm doing this right. And your mother is here to laugh at me." Astrid raised her axe in acknowledgement. Hiccup stuck his tongue out. "First rule of being chief... um..." Hiccup had to think for a minute. Stoick rolled his eyes. "Oh! A chief protects their own. And, uh... no job is too small, no job too big. Aaaaand, there's probably something else to tell you, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Now." Hiccup clapped his hands together. Then he laughed. "I totally forgot what I was going to say!" Stoick sighed. Astrid snickered.

"A chief must be prepared for any situation." Stoick said firmly. "From a simple family dispute to war."

"That one's easy." Ingrid smirked. "Give them all maces."

"You're too much like your mother."

"Hey!" Astrid protested. "There's nothing wrong with smacking someone on the head to get a bit of peace and quiet."

"There is everything wrong with smacking me on the head because it hurts." Hiccup complained childishly. Astrid hefted her axe onto her shoulder and smiled sweetly. Stoick pinched his son's shoulder and directed him to one side.

"One thing you mustn't forget when you're chief- either of you- always remember who you are. Look at this clown- he works hard, he's good with dragons, he mostly knows what he's doing, but he's still a... what do you call him, Astrid?"

"A goofball." Stoick nodded.

"I'm lovable!"

"You're very easily distracted, that's not lovable!"

"I can be both!"

"No. Now, either train your kids as future-chiefs or shut up." Hiccup sidled over to his father, muttering to himself.

"Ingrid," Stoick addressed his eldest granddaughter importantly, "you are very much like your mother, you're a soldier, you're always ready for a fight, ready to defend your home and your family. These are good qualities of a chief, but you have to know when to fight and when to stand down. When to attack and when to call for peace, whether that is for a situation on Berk or between tribes." He looked to his grandson. "Alastor, you strive for peace and knowledge more than war and bloodshed. Admittedly not Viking-like traits, but you take after your dad. You know how hard he works to keep things calm with the other tribes." Alastor nodded, wringing his hands. Hiccup and Astrid smiled reassuringly at him. "And your dragon knowledge is very useful as well. You know how best to work the dragons, for Berk, maybe even for war."

"Uh-" Alastor started. Stoick raised a brow, inviting him to continue. Having not expected this, Alastor faltered. "I... I don't think the dragons should be used for, um, _war_. Is war really necessary?"

"Al," Ingrid scowled, "sometimes there is no other option."

"True." Stoick agreed. "And yet, you must keep an open-mind. There may be a way to win the war as quickly as possible, to delay it, to never start it. Wars may be fought, but it is up to you, as the chief, to defend your tribe, be sure your plans are effective. You will be responsible for victory or defeat, for casualities of either outcome. Do not ever underestimate your opponent. Charging into battle with what you _think_ you know will be a sure fire way of loss." Stoick looked to his son. Hiccup nodded his thanks.

"Ingrid, Al. Whichever of you takes over from me, you need to remember that personal thoughts, feelings and situations may have to be set aside for the good of the village. I try to keep things balanced, get you involved as best I can. Even Aloe. Yes, she is young and she's third in line to be chief, something I doubt will happen. She helps out differently though."

"She hands out flowers." Alastor smiled. "Plays games with the other kids and goes dragon-spotting with them too."

"See?" Hiccup grinned. "Aloe likes to make people smile. Ingrid likes to make people hurt and Al likes to make people learn."

"I don't _just_ like to make people hurt. That's only if they annoy me, I can be very nice too."

"Oh?"

"I don't like bullies."

"We've noticed." Hiccup wiped some dust from his flight suit. "We're also going to throw you both in the deep end." His children blinked at him. "We," He gestured at himself and his wife, who also wore her flight suit, "are going away for the weekend. Dad is going to stay here and make sure you two handle things well. You look after half the village each. Ingrid, North and West. Al, South and East. The centre plaza is common ground. Aloe will be staying with the Hoffersons while we're away."

"Whoa, hold on. You can't just dump this on us."

"You'll get a lot of things dumped on you as chief, Ingrid. You need to get used to surprises." Hiccup and Astrid looked to the sky and gave their respective dragon calls. Stormfly arrived first, chortling at Hiccup. "Yes, very funny. And where have you been? What are you eating?" Toothless heaved, spitting a chunk of raw fish into his rider's hands. Hiccup managed a sickly smile. "Ever a delight."

The siblings watched their parents fly away. Hiccup had thrown Toothless's gift at the Terrors, who had been snoozing and were now fighting over the slobbery meat.

"They can't do this, surely?" Alastor worried.

"Oh, they can." Stoick smiled. "But you two will be alright."

"Does the village know about this?"

"Hiccup sent the message round a few nights ago."

"What did I miss?" Vadik arrived, Aloe swinging on his hand and chattering happily to her Terror, Bob. Ingrid glowered. "Oh, they've gone then?" Vadik snickered.

"You knew?"

"I think everyone but you two knew."

"I knew!" Aloe giggled. "Mummy and Daddy told me before anyone else! They said it was very important and I had to keep it a very big secret!" Ingrid and Alastor shared unimpressed looks and then turned to their grandfather. Stoick's eyes crinkled with delight.

"Looks like you two have some work to do."


	21. Chapter 21

**To Guest- Thank you!**

 **To everyone- apologies for not updating lately, I've been working and was on Netflix for one night, OUAT is killing me at the mo, sorry!**

* * *

"I think they're very rude." Ingrid muttered. "That was barely _one_ lesson and then they fly off! Leaving us with these muttonheads! Not you, Aloe, don't worry." Her little sister brightened. Vadik cleared his throat pointedly. Ingrid blanked him, glaring at their parents. They were tiny specks in the sky now, just on their way to whatever adventure called them this time. Stoick was still there, frowning at his granddaughter expectantly. "You're not always a muttonhead, Grampa, but you did father that idiot." She gestured angrily at her father all the way out there. Stoick _mmph_ 'ed in agreement.

"Well, if you need me, just holler." He swung Aloe up onto one hefty shoulder and carried her away, Bob fluttering behind them. Ingrid mimicked his departure, muttering a few obscenities.

"Aren't you supposed to be a lady-in-training?"

" _Chief_ -in-training." She corrected shortly. Vadik bowed his head apologetically. "I am having serious words with him when he gets back. Can't just dump this on us. Just plain rude, that's what it is." Ingrid stalked off, grumbling to herself. Alastor and Vadik shared bemused looks.

"Well, what's your first act as acting-chief?"

"Um... I dunno. Food?"

"Always a winner." Vadik smiled.

"What are you going to do?"

"Eh." Vadik shrugged carefreely. "Maybe pester Mum for more of those biscuits. You should come by and have a batch, they're _amazing_. As for now, however, I may go find my dragon. Had no luck with Ingrid the other day. I don't think dragons like me."

"No, that's not it. From what Ingrid told me, you got too excited and possibly scared them away. You have to stay calm around dragons, particularly wild ones who aren't overly trusting of humans. If it helps, I suggest you find a Terror to train first and then tackle bigger dragons."

"Terrors are everywhere. How do I know which one I can have?" Alastor scratched as his chin, thinking. He whistled to his own little dragon, Bitey. Bitey didn't bite as much as he used to, but he was more than happy to chomp on someone's arm or leg- once even someone's nose- just for the hell of it. Bitey settled on Alastor's head, chewing on his hair and covering it in dribble. Vadik made a face. Alastor just shrugged. "Come on, I'll help you get a Terror. Ow! _We_ will then. Gods, you're such a drama queen. Stop pulling." Alastor coaxed his dragon into his arms, sighing as drool-coated hair flopped into his face. "I'll get cleaned up first." He signalled to Spike. "Want a lift?"

"My hero." Vadik mock swooned.

"Prat." Alastor snickered.

"You're rude too."

"Thanks."

* * *

"And there it is. Itchy Armpit." Toothless huffed. "Hey, it was your idea." The Night Fury just grumbled. Hiccup locked his tail and jumped off, Astrid not far behind him. He waved cheekily before deploying his wings. Astrid tackled him, knocking him off course and laughing as she jumped away. She landed safely. Hiccup nearly died, scrabbling to grab hold of the cliff face. "Hey! I made you that suit! You could at least appreciate the craftsmanship! And the craftsman!" Toothless landed just above him, dangling his tail over the edge to pull his rider up. Astrid was tucking in her wings and laughing quietly when Hiccup joined her. "Horrible woman."

"Ah, thanks!" She gushed playfully. She waited until he'd reset his suit before springing the fin. Hiccup just sighed. Astrid pouted. "You're no fun anymore."

"You are literally wearing the legacy of my fun."

"But you've got one too!"

"His and hers!"

"Boohoo." Astrid made a face. "Mine's better than yours."

"I put extra care into your one because I'm such a lovely and thoughtful husband." She snorted. Hiccup crossed his arms. Toothless and Stormfly exchanged looks and raced off to play. "Why are you so mean?"

"I'm not being mean." He copied her pig-noise and she glowered. "Fine," she flicked the hair from her eyes, "if you really want to know, I'm trying to get that dork of mine back."

"Oh, so I _am_ your dork?"

"You were always my dork. Well, after a certain point. Before that you were a walking, talking headache. Still are, but..." She shrugged. "You've grown on me."

"You make me sound like some kind of fungus."

"All men are."

"See, now you're being mean!"

"So what if I am? What are you going to do about it?" She challenged. Hiccup pursed his lips, tucking in the last of his right wing. "Exactly what I thought." Astrid smirked. "Absolutely not- Oof!" He had tackled her, knocking the wind from her lungs. She wheezed an insult or two, pinned.

"Hey." He smiled flirtatiously. "Fancy finding you here. And so wonderfully garbed as well, you must introduce me to the creator!" Astrid drew a breath to tell him to shove off. Hiccup wasn't listening, propping himself up on his elbows either side of her head and lacing his fingers under his chin. "I bet he's the best, really charming and handsome and clever and amazing and-"

"Fatheaded and egotisical and chauvanistic-"

"I am not chauvanistic!" Distracted, Astrid could get the better of him, flipping them over and wedging her forearm against his throat. "Huh." He said. "You'd have thought I'd have seen that coming."

"You were always blind to my good looks."

"Now who's egotisical?"

"I've every right to be."

"Do you now?"

"Yup."

"Says who?"

"Says me."

"And who gave you the power to say that?"

"I did." Hiccup hummed disbelievingly. "I could have disagreed to marrying you. You could have ended up with someone far less interesting."

"True." His eyes slid past her and narrowed distastefully. "There's a storm coming." Astrid drew a dagger and positioned it between his eyes, glancing over her shoulder. Hiccup was going cross-eyed to keep the blade in sight, not daring to worm his way out of this predicament.

"So there is. We should find some shelter then." The dagger vanished and she hopped to her feet, pulling him up. Together, they summoned their dragons and took off. On one of the neighbouring islands- Murderous Milady, aptley named- was a deep cave. Hiccup checked for dragons before venturing in to build a fire. Astrid busied herself establishing the cave's defences. She had Stormfly layer the entrance with a trench of Nadder spines, covered the mouth of the cave with a network of leaves, twigs and rocks and produced a series of traps out the front. The storm was almost upon them when she stood back to admire her handiwork.

"Feeling better?" Hiccup asked. He had set up the inside of the cave, laying down blankets and his fur cloak to make things a bit more homely. The fire was toasty warm and crackling. He was cooking a salmon over it for them. Toothless had already gathered food for him and Stormfly, hoarding it in the corner. The dragons were happily settled down for the night, free of their saddles.

"You'll thank me when we're not attacked tonight."

"What if I really need to pee though? And I get caught in a trap and you don't wake up? You might not hear me over the thunder, I could catch my death of cold."

"If that happens, I'll send my deepest apologies to Valhalla for you."

"Thanks." He deadpanned. Astrid sat next to him, the first boom of thunder making him jump.

"Are you alright?" She brushed a hand through the mess of hair at the back of his head, feeling the slightest of nods. She said nothing, tying in a braid as he gathered his thoughts.

"No." He eventually admitted. "I keep seeing him."

"When you sleep?"

"I think so. I don't know. I can't tell if I'm asleep or awake. But he just stands there, covered in blood and staring at me." He drew the fish from the fire, hands shaking so much, Astrid cleaned it for him, cutting it into equal chunks for them to share before letting them simmer over the fire for a little longer.

"Does he ever say anything to you?"

"Once." Hiccup replied quietly. Astrid rubbed soothing circles into his back, leaning against his shoulder. "'I hope you're happy'." He continued in a smaller voice still.

"When did you see him last?"

"Some time early this morning."

"Why didn't you wake me? I could have helped."

"Wasn't fair on you."

"Hiccup, I'm your _wife_. If you need me, I'll be there." He looked pained. Astrid shifted over, sitting in his lap so he couldn't ignore her. "Remember when Aloe was born?" He nodded vaguely. "I was so scared we lost her too. But you sat by me, you didn't leave me. 'Astrid, it'll be alright. You of all people should know how much of a fighter that baby is, she didn't stop kicking you for five months'. Remember saying that?"

"Of sorts."

"You told me she was too excited to wait, she wanted to meet us all. That's why she was early. She'd been trying to break out from the very beginning." He nodded again, slowly coming into focus. "I was in so much pain, I didn't know how I'd manage if we'd lost her too. I thought I'd let you down again. But then I looked over at you, I saw your face and... I remembered. You weren't going anywhere. You'd been by my side even when I didn't want you there all those years ago. You're the most infuriating person I've ever met. Yet, if I had to choose all over again, I'd choose you. No-one has stood by me as much as you have. The same goes from me to you. I don't care if Berk is burning to the ground and the gods have descended to take me away; if you've got a problem, Hiccup, I want to be there to help you. Don't shut me out." She cupped his face in her hands, looking straight into his eyes. "Please." She added softly, expression gentle. His hands slowly came up to cover hers and he bowed his head, eyes closing.

"I thought he was real. I thought he was there to take you all away." His voice cracked. Astrid slid her arms around his shoulders, one hand in his hair, his head under her chin. His arms were tight around her, he was trembling all over. "I'd be a hiccup again, I'd be nobody without you."

"That's not true-"

"I can't breathe if you're not with me. It hurts. I can't think, I can't... every move I make is like dragging a Gronckle along. And every time you come back, every time I see you again, it all goes away. You always made things better. You gave me something to focus on, something to keep me going. I'm _terrified_ you'll go one day... and... and not come back and..." His breath hitched. Astrid shushed him, smoothing his hair down, firmer hold, warmer embrace.

"I will never not come back." She promised, lips against his ear. "You stand by me, I stand by you."

"I'm just as bad as Dagur was."

"No." Astrid defied instantly. "Dagur killed for fun and revenge. You killed for peace. It sounds oxymoronic, but it's true. Look how much calmer Berk has been now we don't have to worry about Berserkers and Outcasts flooding our waters, invading our beaches and stealing through the village, hurting people, _your_ people-" He shook his head.

"Our people."

"Friends, families, generations of heritage and ancestory, of _home_ , made safe because of what you did. Dagur could have had a worse ending, part of me wishes he had done, but you kept it simple, you got the job done quickly, you _freed_ us. Why can't you understand that?"

"The Berserkers had families. Homes, friends. I broke them up."

"Which is where I stepped in. I had Rangvald make sure those families were put back together. The tribes you put them in are helping them rehabilitate into better people. You'd be surprised how many of them are actually happier this way. They thought they'd never see their families again. Maybe they've lost their friends, maybe they've lost their homes. But they have the chance to start over. Dagur wouldn't have given them that. You know he wouldn't have." Hiccup stayed quiet. Astrid let him, gave him the time to think, gave him time to let the information sink in, to let him remember who he was and why.

The storm outside was fierce, lightning crashing down as heavily as the rain itself, the thunder so ferocious, it seemed to shake the earth. Neither of them moved. The dragons, fed, were peacefully asleep, oblivious to the heavens opening outside their shelter. Hiccup's breathing became less scratchy, less erratic, soothed by her warm presence, her eloquent words, her calloused hand soft in his hair, her thudding heart against his ear in time with his own. She was his and he was hers. They had been for years and they would be for many more.

Astrid slowly detached herself and lay him down on the blankets, lying next to him, face to face, forehead to forehead. He reached past her for his cloak, pulling it over them both. She planted a sweet kiss on his lips, her palm pressing to his chest to feel the steady beat of the organ inside. His arm went around her, drawing her closer, and he soon fell asleep, eyes fixated on hers all the while beforehand. Astrid tenderly brushed his hair back, smiling sleepily. "I love you too." She whispered, joining his slumber.


	22. Chapter 22

Alastor had made things a little easier by splitting the centre plaza into four with painted red lines, labelling their respective duties with their initials. Any houses that fell over the lines were equally shared between the two acting-chiefs. That was Vadik's idea. Alastor had been more than happy to give Ingrid the extra homes, but it wasn't fair practise, Stoick had told them. "A chief will learn to delegate, but he must also be fair. Or she."

"When are Mum and Dad coming back?" Alastor asked.

"In two days." The boy's shoulders slumped defeatedly. He couldn't get his head around this chiefing business; people kept running up to him from South and East with various problems, hounding him and making his head spin. Bjorn Junior helped him get the demands organised on a list in order of importance and that helped. Alastor was just disappointed with himself for not creating that list on his own. Ingrid had done that, after she- surprisingly- calmed those in need. Vadik was her right hand, but he didn't really do much. Ingrid had really come into her own, taking charge, settling disputes without extreme threats, organised the fishing and hunting expeditions, found a missing Terror for one of the children, returned said child to his mother. Alastor had so far managed to narrowly avoid a nervous breakdown, lose his list twice and accidentally ordered Spike to set fire to a line of shubbery with the wrong signal. Bjorn did his best, but when Alastor started stammering again, he clammed up and went to find his sister for help.

"Al, don't fret. Grampa Fenrir was telling me how many mistakes Dad made when he first started out as chief. He managed to sink four boats, lose his leg and set fire to a couple of the crop fields within his first morning." Alastor bit his lip, not meeting his sister's gaze. He felt her hand on his shoulder, folded his arms across his chest. "It'll take practise."

"You're not fr-fr-freaking out th-though."

"Oh, I am." He shook his head. Ingrid laughed nervously. Alastor looked at her then. "Vadik hid my axe and daggers and Grampa Stoick put me under strict instructions not to take anyone prisoner. Or punch anyone in the face, no violence. Do you have any idea how hard that it?" Alastor smiled weakly. "I'm freaking out, look." She raised her hand, palm parallel to the ground. He could see it shaking like a leaf in a late autumn gust. "But we've got to put all personal issues to one side, remember?"

"I know, I know, I'm just... I c-ca-can't." Ingrid's expression softened, pitying. Alastor turned away.

"Hey." She stopped him, catching him by the elbow. "Listen. I don't know how helpful this will be to you, but it helped me and I think it helps Dad too. There are two sides to us. Regular Viking and Chief Viking. Think about what makes you Regular Alastor and put that to one side. Do the same for Chief Alastor and stick with that. Focus on what a chief is and does, particularly what _you_ would do as chief, who you _are_ as chief." She peered into his eyes worriedly, earnestly. "Does that help?"

"M-maybe a little..." She smiled kindly.

"Remember that Al that punched Arne in the face? Try him."

"Oh, but I don't like him."

"Yeah, well. Word spreads quick around Berk. A lot of people like him." Alastor made a face and her smile warmed. "See? Like Dad already."

"I'm not-"

"Don't give me that rubbish. You're both dragon-nerds, you're both dorks, you're both... weird." She spun him around and cheekily kicked his backside. "Go and chief or I'll fight you for single reign." Alastor made to say something, thought better of it and, shaking his head, left.

"Very nice." Vadik congratulated, appearing from round the corner. "I heard it all, I hear everything. I'm nosy." Ingrid hummed. "I wish I had an older sister like you, that'd be cool." She crossed her arms, one hip out to the side. "Well, if you're going to be like that, I won't say nice things about you."

"As if you ever."

"I do, _actually_." He emphasised each syllable. "I said you were kind and supportive and funny and smart, but you're also violent and tempermental and sarcastic and sly." She grinned wickedly. "And you're not denying a single one of them."

"I don't deny the truth."

"Oh yeah?" He challenged.

"Yeah." Her eyes narrowed warily.

"So, if I was to say, for example, you were very pretty, you won't deny it?"

"I'm not-"

"Aha! I win!" Ingrid turned her back on him, but not before he saw her flush crimson. "I like what you've done with your hair this morning. You look like your mother. Well, if she had dark hair that is. Anyway, you're very busy. I'm going to go and see Aloe. Enjoy your day, call if you need your hero in shining armour."

"I am my own hero in shining armour, you muttonhead."

"Of course." Vadik agreed, slowly backing out without a care. "Doesn't mean you can't have a reserve though."

* * *

"Feeling better?" Bjorn asked politely. Alastor took a deep breath, rubbing his hands together.

"I think so."

"What did your sister say?"

"Two sides to a chief." Bjorn nodded, silently encouraging him to continue. "She said Dad works like that too?" Another nod. "And it really works?" Bjorn smiled. "What if I mess up again though?"

"Don't let it knock you. Take a deep breath and look for a solution. Don't run from it. Just stop and think, get yourself under control before you do anything else. But if you need a break, I'm sure no-one will mind."

"But... that's bad, I can't take a b-break..."

"Hey. Deep breath." Alastor obeyed. "And slowly out. Everything will work out fine. People here know your history. They'll get you'll need some time to come to terms with things. Besides, this is only a temporary thing. Hiccup will give you both more practise until he thinks you're ready. Who he'll pick though will remain a mystery."

"He'll probably pick Ingrid. I don't want to be the chief."

"Neither did your father."

"But he's a great chief!"

"Wasn't always. He was a great _son_ of the chief, he had a little power, something he could handle. He's doing something similar for you and Ingrid." Bjorn smiled again. "Trust your dad. He may be mad, but he only wants what is best for his family and for Berk. Now, if you're up for it, we've got some work to do. There's a storm coming."

"Mum and Dad are out in that." Alastor realised, panic slamming into him. Bjorn waved it off.

"If Hiccup and Astrid can't handle a little storm, I'll eat my left boot."

* * *

"How do you think they're doing?" Hiccup asked. They sat in the mouth of the cave, under a woven canopy of leaves and rope, watching the rain. Astrid caught a few drops in her palm before answering.

"For acting-chiefs who've only had one lesson, probably well enough." Hiccup stuck his tongue out at her. She flicked her fingers, splattering his face with rainwater. "They'll be fine. Stop worrying. Ingrid can handle herself and Al... well, Al's not silly. Once he gets his head around this, he'll be alright. I imagine he'll chief like you."

"So, amazingly well then?"

"With an overwhelming amount of modesty." Astrid sighed. "You slept well last night."

"And you didn't have to drug me."

"Ah. I was kind of hoping you'd missed that one."

"You're not discreet all the time, milady."

"Why'd you go along with it if you knew then?"

"I trust you." She looked at him questioningly. "You know how to look after me better than anyone else, even me. You just do your thing, I'll mostly support you for it."

"Mostly."

"Yes." He smiled sweetly. Astrid returned it, punching him in the leg. "Ow! No, it's OK, bud! Just Astrid being mean." She raised her fist again. He flung his arms protectively over his head, scooting out of reach. Astrid mimicked, following him. "I'm sorry, you're not mean, you were just expressing your obvious love for me." She flicked his ear. With his renowned dramatic flair, he collapsed backwards and lay still.

"I have vanquished this mighty beast!" Astrid declared victoriously.

"I wouldn't be so sure." Hiccup said, eyes closed. "Undead warrior." He growled, rigidly sitting up with his arms out. "Rar."

"Oh no, save me, save me! Hey!" Hiccup had grabbed her by the leg. Astrid locked vice-like grips on his wrists and rolled backwards, pinning him to the ground, one knee on his chest and his hands trapped over his head. He squirmed, miffed when he couldn't free himself. "Undead warrior or not, I will take you down."

"What if I really was an undead monster? Your husband back from Valhalla? Just for you." He added.

"Probably wouldn't make much of a difference." Astrid shrugged. He pouted sulkishly and she laughed, kissing his nose. "You loon. But there's no way you're going to Valhalla without me. We'll both come back as undead warriors and terrorise everyone." He brightened. "You're not the only one with a plan."

"I'm glad to hear it." She frowned. "That wasn't meant to be sarcastic, I swear." In response, she threw herself backwards, planting a foot on his chest and vaulting him out into the torrental rain. He wailed. "That's _cold_!" Astrid laughed, that wicked and tormenting laugh. Hiccup rushed her, hauling her out into the rain too.

"Oh my gods, that _is_ cold!"

"Ha!" Astrid kicked puddle water at him, racing off and splashing through the mud, slipping and sliding. Hiccup struggled after her, taking a heavy tumble when his artificial foot failed him again. Astrid hopped back over neatly, smiling endearingly, hands behind her back. Hiccup wiped mud from his face. She offered her hand only to be pulled down too. "I think I'll just stay here for a moment." Hiccup sighed contentedly. Astrid rolled onto her side, propping her chin on his chest. He smiled, gently scraping her soaked and muddy hair from her face, behind her ear. She stuck her bottom lip out. "What?"

"Well, our last storm as big as this together, you were much nicer."

"Because I started singing and dancing?"

"Maybe..."

"Would you like to dance now? I'll even sing if you want, but I may be a bit rusty." She shone a crooked smile at him.

"No, you're right." She turned her head, laying above his heart. "It's strange, but this is quite nice."

"Still cold though."

"And muddy."

"Wee bit of mud ne'er hurt a Viking!" Hiccup declared in his impression of Hackett, shaking a fist at the sky. Astrid shook her head, curling up to his side. His arms went around her, pulling her up slightly to rest his head next to hers. He smiled, close-lipped. Astrid did too, wiping a bit of mud from his cheek with her finger.

"You need to shave."

"I might grow a beard."

"Oh, don't!"

"Why?"

"I can't imagine you with a beard. That's like Gothi talking or the twins behaving or Hackett having a sense of humour."

"Let me try, see how it looks. Maybe you'll even braid that too." A light sparked in her eyes, intrigued. "And, if you don't like it, I'll get rid of it. Promise."

"Maybe it'll look better with braids..."

"Only one way to find out." He grinned. "Do we have a deal?"

"Just this once." He offered his little finger to her, making a pinky promise. "It'll be itchy though."

"It already is. Why do we even get itches? Not just when we're growing impressive facial hair, but in general? Who even thought of that?" Astrid laughed softly.

"Only you."

* * *

 **How many of you like Ninja Turtles?**


	23. Chapter 23

Hiccup and Astrid returned a day early. Hiccup claimed he had been homesick. Astrid said he had missed proper cooking. Alastor didn't really mind either way, he was just happy he didn't have to manage South and East anymore. Bjorn Junior spoke to Hiccup about Alastor's work while the boy was off to find his sisters. "We had a bit of a wobble at the beginning, but Ingrid helped him with that. Two sides to a chief." Hiccup nodded, smiling. He became sincere when his wife joined them.

"Ingrid may have some competition."

"Ooh, she's not going to like that. Has Al changed his mind then?"

"No." Bjorn answered with a laugh. "And I don't think this has helped. Sorry, Hiccup, but Alastor doesn't want to be chief."

"Well, that's up to him, isn't it?"

"Mummy, Daddy!" Aloe sprinted towards them, a crown of various wildflowers on her head. Hiccup and Astrid knelt beside each other, arms out. Aloe hug-tackled them both, laughing. "Hello, hello! You're home! Look at me, I'm a princess!" She spun. "New dress too! Nana H made it for me!"

"Exactly like a princess." Astrid agreed, smiling and feeling the material of this new dress, pastel blue and lilac. "Silk and cotton. And you can hardly see the stitching. Mm." She huffed. "She's just showing off now."

"I bet Snotlout could make something like that." Hiccup offered Aloe his hand, twirling her around. "Have you had any princes after you, Aloe?"

"No. No boys for me! I will be like Ingrid and kick butt! Ingrid, Al, look at my new dress!" Her siblings cheered and dropped to their knees, bowing repeatedly. Aloe beamed, skipping and hopping happily. Their parents laughed softly, sharing amused looks. "I am Princess Aloe of flowers and dragons and I shall be the nicest princess ever! Let's go and get food!" She sprinted off. Ingrid and Alastor scrambled after her.

"I might just put Aloe in charge." Hiccup mused.

"Oh, stop it." Astrid swatted him. Bjorn smiled. "Wait, we're one short. Where's Vadik?" Bjorn simply shrugged. "Thanks for watching over Al, Bjorn. Here." Astrid gave him a pouch of coins. Bjorn stared at it in amazement. "Just take it. We have this argument every time, get yourself something nice, put it away for a rainy day or something." She dropped it in his hands. Bjorn backed off, thanking them repeatedly, bowing his head, thank you thank you thank you. "I do like Bjorn. You need to set him up with someone _really_ nice."

"All of a sudden you approve of my matchmaking? Who are you and what did you do with my wife?" He gripped her by the shoulders, shaking her. "Astrid! Don't go into the light!"

"Get off, you muttonhead!" She twisted his arm.

"Ow, ow. Yup, that's the right amount of pain. Hello, milady." He smiled over his shoulder with some obvious effort. Astrid rolled her eyes and let him go. "Yeah, we're home." He grinned, flexing his arm. "Well, what now?"

"Let's go in and get you fed." Hiccup's stomach growled in response and she snickered. Hiccup went in first. Toothless and Stormfly had already gone in and made themselves at home, lighting the fire and eating the fish. Astrid was about to follow when the door moved on its own. "Hic-" She started, cut off by the sudden appearance of Vadik. He smiled at them both.

"Payback." And he punched Hiccup, knocking the chief into Astrid. "Sorry, but it had to happen. At least when you weren't expecting it." Hiccup mentally shook himself and stood up straight. Vadik winced at the damage; split scarlet lip and what would soon be a big bruise across his jaw. Despite this, Hiccup still managed to smile.

"I deserved that. Are we good now?" Vadik offered his hand. They pair gripped forearms, smiling.

"I think we are."

"Then if you don't mind, Astrid was going to feed me." He looked back at his wife.

"Move then, fat ass."


	24. Chapter 24

**I've been working the last few nights and haven't had the chance to update, sorry!**

* * *

Hiccup arrived home one lunch time to see all three children sitting around the table, clearly doing their best to console their mother. Hiccup joined them, shedding his cloak. "What's going on?"

"Grampa Fenrir's not well." Ingrid said solemnly. From her expression, Hiccup gleaned 'not well' was dire. "Gothi can't do much for him." Astrid smacked her fist on the table.

"She can't do _anything_ for him!"

"Kids, will you give us a minute?" The trio nodded and ventured upstairs, Alastor carrying his little sister. Hiccup slid around the table and sat next to his wife, holding her to him. "Hey." He said softly, bowing his head to glimpse her watery eyes. Her expression hardened and she shut her eyes resolutely. "Talk to me. What happened?"

"Mum said he's been getting worse for months. She's tried every kind of remedy she can think of, every prayer to every god and... nothing. I didn't even know." Her voice cracked, turned her head into his shoulder. Hiccup put his other arm around her, resting his cheek atop her head. "How could I not know? He's my dad."

"He's like you. Won't let on that he's ill, everyone else is more important. Where do you think you got it from?" She shook her head slightly. "What did Gothi say?"

"Prepare for the worst." Hiccup's heart sank. He had known Fenrir all his life, had known him as one of his father's most treasured warriors, as fierce and as fearless as his brother. He had particularly come to know Fenrir as he grew closer to Astrid over the years, almost a third father-figure. "I need to go and see him."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"The kids though..."

"They'll be fine, I'll send them over to Mum and Dad." Astrid hesitated, eventually nodding. Hiccup rose carefully, keeping an arm about her. "Look at me, Astrid. Whatever happens, I won't let you go through it alone." He tipped her chin up with his fingertips, entwining his fingers with hers. "We're all family, we take care of each other." She nodded, tears beginning to fall. Hiccup smoothed them away with his thumb. "Come on. I bet you he'll be as stubborn as ever." Astrid managed a weak smile. "Kids!" Hiccup called. Ingrid appeared at the top of the stairs, crouching to see her parents. "You're banished to the other Haddocks. Trot off."

"But we want to see Grampa Fenrir too."

"Not now, Ingrid."

"Later?"

"Maybe. Keep an eye on the other two for us." Ingrid inclined her head and disappeared. Hiccup made sure they were off in the right direction before prying his wife from the bedroom. She had retreated to compose herself, hurriedly wiping her face when he entered. "Up for this?"

"No, but I have to see him." Her eyes locked on his pleadingly. Hiccup held out his hand.

"I'm not leaving your side for a second. And I mean that in an endearing and supportive husband way, not in a creepy stalkerish way. Not that I could be your stalker. You'd never know about me if I was." She attempted an eye roll. Hiccup kissed her cheek, linking their arms. "Let's just stick with endearing and supportive."

* * *

Fenrir, despite his protests, was under strict instructions to not leave his home, he was meant to rest, take it easy, enjoy the finer things in life. When they arrived, he was sitting at the table. "Since when did you do whittling?" Astrid smiled.

"Since this morning." Fenrir grunted. "Afternoon, Hiccup."

"Afternoon, sir." His father-in-law gestured for them to sit. Hildegard swanned in to see who had turned up, smiling in relief at them. Hiccup took up a block of wood and drew a knife, chatting amiably. Fenrir nodded and muttered here and there. "On the upside, Sven is considering another vow of silence."

"Oh thank the gods." Fenrir sighed, giving a small smile. "I've waited for that day for years."

"I think we all have." He swore colourfully, glowering at the scarlet stain spreading across his knuckles. "Sorry, sorry." He apologised hastily. Astrid stood with a huff, getting the medical box from the shelf and muttering obscenities. She cleaned the new wound and bound it. Hiccup waggled his fingers.

"You don't ever change, boy." Fenrir nodded. Hiccup smiled. "Keep it that way." He warned. "I've not much longer, I know that and I've accepted it. I've had a good run." Astrid sniffled, slowly and quietly closing the box. "You've looked after my daughter all these years, been good to her. Promise me that won't change when I'm gone."

"I promise, sir."

"Astrid."

"Dad?"

"Hold onto this idiot." Astrid nodded, hands shaking as she returned the medical supplies. "Look at me, Astrid." She did. Hildegard motioned to Hiccup and they left the room, leaving father and daughter to talk. "Don't let my passing stop you from doing anything you want. I don't care if you're a hundred years old and want to go and conquer Rome, go for it. Take that pillock with you." He jabbed a thumb over his shoulder.

"You haven't called him a pillock in a while."

"It's a good word." Astrid smiled weakly. "Yes, I know. Hiccup has grown on me over the years. He does that." He nodded, examining his craft. "What does this look like to you?"

"Um... dragon dung?"

"Hmph." Fenrir tossed it into the flames, turning in his seat to watch it go up. He rested an elbow on the table, other hand pressing against his ribs. Astrid started, hands on his arm. "I'm alright, chickety." Her eyes burned. Her father's pet name for her hadn't surfaced in many a-year, not since she was Ingrid's age at least. She had begun to think he had forgotten it. Maybe it was because she had grown up, moved out and on. "I don't know how much longer I've got, maybe weeks, maybe days. I just want you to know I'm proud of you, I always have been. You've always been my little fighter, you've done well for yourself and I know you'll continue to do so."

"Dad... I... I'm going to miss you."

"And I you." He brushed her hair from her face, grazing his knuckles across her cheek. "Take care of the family for me, but don't forget to take care of yourself either, chickety. Train Ingrid to keep an eye on Hiccup, maybe even Alastor. Get that boy some confidence. And let Aloe work on making Berk a big flower garden."

"Is that her latest job idea?"

"One of many."

"Everyone will be alright, Dad."

"I know they will. I trust you to take care of them. Now get that prat in here, I need to talk to him."

"Don't scare him, Dad."

"Someone has to keep him on his toes."

"That's usually my job."

"Ah well. I need something to amuse me in Valhalla." Astrid stood and hugged her father around the shoulders. Fenrir crushed her in his mighty arms.

"I love you, Dad." She sniffed.

"I'm not going yet."

"I just needed to say it." Fenrir chuckled.

"I love you too, chickety."


	25. Chapter 25

"What did Dad want to talk about?" Astrid demanded when Hiccup emerged sometime later. Her eyes were red and puffy, but earnest, almost desperate.

"He wanted to finalise a few things, get his affairs in orders." Astrid noticed the scroll in his hand; she knew what it was straight away, her breath hitching in her chest. Hiccup touched her cheek kindly, but wouldn't give her the will. "Sorry. But I've been told no-one else is to see it until… after." She flushed angrily. Hiccup said nothing more, didn't protest, simply embraced her. Her anger drained and she slumped against him, trembling, fingers clenching in the back of his tunic. "He's accepted it, Astrid. He knows how it'll affect everyone else, he knows it'll hurt; he wants you all to know that he's at peace, he's not in pain and he's happy." Astrid pressed her face into his shoulder, taking the time to gather her thoughts and composition. "I'm sorry it came to this. If I could change it, I would."

"I know." Her muffled voice sounded. "What do we tell the kids?"

"I'll talk to them. You stay here, help your mum."

"But-" She tilted her head back to look at him imploringly. Hiccup just smiled, looping a stray curl around her ear, palm to her jawline. She leant against his fingers with silent gratitude, rubbing at the reddened skin to dispose of tearful evidence. She put on a smile, blue spheres dim and worried, but determined. Hiccup offered a final hug before letting her and her father be.

* * *

Astrid didn't return home until dinnertime. Hiccup had managed to scrap together something for the meal and worked a few household chores from his wife's to-do list. Aloe hopped up from her seat the second she saw her mother, babbling about her day, asking about her grandfather, "Are you alright, Mummy?" Astrid nodded, producing a feeble smile. Aloe stood on her toes, arms outstretched. "You need a hug." She declared, grinning. Astrid obliged, kneeling. Stormfly padded over, sensing her rider's unease, squawking and nudging her. Hiccup wasn't far behind, offering a small satchel of prepared food. The Nadder was already saddled; she needed a long night-time flight, he always knew.

"Make sure you eat something though." She nodded, not particularly hungry, but he would know. She ventured out with a wave to the others, relishing in the cool night air batting her skin. Hiccup watched her go, biting his thumbnail.

"Dad?"

"Mm?" He hummed, not looking round.

"Mum will be alright, won't she?" Alastor drummed his fingers on the table nervously.

"As alright as she can be." Hiccup sighed. "Empty plates you lot, then bed."

"Not tired!" Aloe protested instantly. "I want to stay up and wait for Mummy."

"And what will she say if you did?"

"Um…" Aloe smiled sheepishly. "I will go to bed. But still not tired." She added stubbornly. "Can we see Grampa Fenrir tomorrow?"

"Maybe."

"I will take that as a yes."

* * *

Aloe was asleep when her mother trudged in. Stormfly had already joined Toothless upstairs to supervise the hatchlings. Hiccup was sat at the table, reading over a series of letters from neighbouring tribes, updating him on the rehabilitated-Berserkers situation. Astrid fished some soup from the pot simmering over the fire, dunking torn chunks of bread. Hiccup watched quietly, knowing she had barely touched the food he had provided earlier. She was shivering, but her eyes were shining, awakened and a little clearer. The flight had done her some good, had put her jumbled thoughts into a line, her emotions in check. "He'll be in Valhalla." She told him. "We'll see him again, won't we?"

"I'm sure of it."

"I'll miss him here though."

"We all will." Hiccup soothed, covering her hand with his. "Feeling better?"

"Maybe a bit."

"We can work with that."

"I'm worried about Mum. She and Dad married when they were both young- maybe a year or two younger than us when we married."

"She's a Hofferson, she'll come out fighting." Astrid nodded, squeezing his fingers gratefully. "You watch, she'll be round here, telling me off about mess and cooking and colour-coordinating the vegetables or alphabetizing the books and tutting about the dust under the rug."

"That wasn't me this time."

"No, it was Ingrid."

"And you let her?"

"Who am I to tell her off? I do the exact same thing."

"It's a Haddock thing." Astrid simply inclined her head.

* * *

 **There was more to this chapter, but I can't remember it, I stopped writing it halfway through and have only just got back to it. I've written the next chapter though, I'm on a roll :D**


	26. Chapter 26

"This week is just a barrel of laughs." Hiccup huffed sarcastically, dropping dramatically into his seat. Astrid handed over an ice block, quickly pressed to his aching head with a heavily relieved sigh. "Talked to Ruffnut lately?"

"Yeah, but now I feel I've missed something. Speaking of a Nut though, Tuff wanted to talk to you earlier." Hiccup nodded. "What did he want?"

"Believe it or not, my matchmaking skills."

"What? No way!" Hiccup just smiled. "I'm going to find them, I need answers." She planted a quick kiss on his cheek and vanished out the door. Stormfly took off seconds later, Toothless sulking in when he had no-one to play with. He brightened upon seeing his human, bumbling over excitedly, gummy smile in place. Hiccup grinned. He could do with a good fly right now.

* * *

Astrid found Tuffnut first. He was giving Barf and Belch a scrub down, in a foul mood. "Need a hand?" He startled, dropping the brush on his foot.

"Ow! Holy crap in a bucket!" He hopped around, clutching his smarting foot. Astrid dismounted, gathering the brush. "I take it Hiccup's talked to you. About me, of course, what else would he talk about?"

"You want Hiccup to set you up with someone?" Tuffnut nodded, testing his weight on his foot, satisfied when it didn't fall off. "Everything alright, Tuff? Why do you want Hiccup to help you?"

"He's the resident matchmaker, everyone knows that. Look how well he did with Fishlegs and Heather."

"And your sister and Eret. Oh, I see what the problem is. Ruff's married now and you don't get to see her as often." He hunched his shoulders defensively. Astrid took that as a yes. "Have you talked to her about this?"

"No." He muttered. "She's happy with Eret, I don't want to ruin that."

"Oh, Tuff. I'm sure she'll understand, you two are twins, you've always been together. This sudden detachment would have knocked you both for six. I bet she misses you too." Tuffnut said nothing, taking the brush back. Astrid found a second and helped clean the Zippleback. "So, you want Hiccup to find someone for you. Do you really want someone or are you just trying to be like Ruff?" He paused, thoughts whirling behind his eyes.

"A bit of both, I think." Astrid smiled kindly. "But would anyone really go for me?"

"Tuff, don't think like that. You watch, Hiccup will find someone head over heels for you."

"Really? Would you date me?"

"I'm married."

"If you weren't."

"You're like a brother to me, I can't answer that."

"That's just a nice way of saying no."

"Tuff-"

"No, it's OK, Astrid. I get it." He started bathing Belch again. "I'm just destined to be forever alone."

"That's not true." But he had stopped listening, biting the inside of his cheek, eyes distant. He had switched off, lost in his thoughts. Astrid stayed long enough to finish helping. "Tuff, even if- a very big if- you really are meant to be alone, you're always welcome at ours. You're family, you don't deserve to be on your own." He nodded his thanks. Astrid squeezed his shoulder, waving to Stormfly. "Hiccup will find someone for you, trust me. He won't want you left out either." She thought for a moment. "If you're feeling up to it, come by for dinner later. Our treat." He shrugged. "It'll be nice to have you over. Aloe loves your jokes." Astrid climbed into the saddle and took off.

* * *

Ruffnut was at her parents', stewing miserably over a mug of yak stew. Her parents were out with their respective jobs, so Astrid let herself in, taking a seat opposite her friend.

"Hiccup send you?"

"What aren't you telling me?"

"You already know." Astrid raised a brow. "I'm a disappointment. I've let my brother down, I've let Eret down, I've-"

"Whoa, hold on." Astrid made a T with her hands. "You're not a disappointment." Ruffnut scowled and shook her head. "Fine, why are you supposedly so disappointing?" To her surprise, Ruffnut burst into tears. Astrid jumped to her feet, hurrying to console her. "Hey," she said softly, "talk to me, Ruff, what's wrong? What's happened?"

"I-didn't-mean-to-abandon-Tuff," she started through gasping sobs, then couldn't continue, overcome with emotion. Astrid held her until she cried herself out, mumbling assurances, stroking her hair, doing her best to soothe her. Ruffnut fell into a bout of hiccups.

"Take a deep breath." Astrid advised kindly. "And talk to me. I won't laugh or judge you, don't worry about any of that."

"When I married Eret, I thought I could split my time between him and Tuff, but... it's harder than I thought. I'm a horrible sister." Tears welled in her eyes again. "He hates me, I know he does."

"No, he doesn't. I just saw him, he misses you. He's just as upset as you are, but he doesn't know how to handle it. You two have been joined at the hip since birth, it's only natural you feel like this now. Make some time to see him, hash it out if you have to, but get your brother back."

"What if he doesn't want that though?"

"I'll kick his ass." Ruffnut smiled weakly. "Why do you think you've let Eret down though?" The smile dimmed.

"I went to see Gothi this morning," she began shakily, wringing her hands, "I... I..." Ruffnut faltered, took a deep breath and shook her head again. "I can't have kids. I'm barren, Astrid, and Eret... I haven't told him, but he _really_ wants a son and I can't-" Her voice cracked and she seemed to shrink in on herself, eyes closing. Astrid could do nothing but prolong her sisterly embrace, completely lost for words. Some women _were_ barren, there was no way around it. Admittedly, she had never seen Ruffnut as the mothering type, but she clearly loved Eret so much so to go through all of that just for him. And yet, she couldn't. Astrid could only imagine Eret's reaction, something akin to Hiccup's when they lost their third.

"I'm so sorry, Ruff." She murmured. "I'll come with you to talk to Eret if you want, but..." She hefted a shoulder helplessly.

"I can't tell him. Could you tell him?"

"It'd be best coming from you." Ruffnut sniffed. Astrid produced a handkerchief from her sleeve and pushed it into her hand. "I'm really sorry. If you ever need anything, just ask."

"Thank you." Ruffnut croaked, blowing her nose loudly. Astrid smiled.

"Why don't you come to dinner later? You haven't been over in _ages_."

"OK."

* * *

"The twins are coming for dinner today." Astrid told Hiccup upon her return.

"Do they know the other is going to be here?" Astrid pressed her lips together. Hiccup smiled. "My planning skills are wearing off on you."

"Did you sort Tuffnut out?"

"I may have found someone."

"Who?"

"That'd be telling."

"Oh, come on! Tell me!" He shook his head. "Why not?"

"Because she doesn't know it either yet."

"That doesn't mean I can't know. Just tell me!"

"We've got to get dinner ready, especially now we've got guests. Is Eret coming too?" Astrid shrugged. "Has Ruff talked to him?" Astrid sighed. Hiccup did too, pulling the scrolls before him into a pile. "In her own time then, I suppose. What's on the menu?"

"You if you don't tell me who this _she_ is for Tuff."

"You're resorting to cannibalism earlier than I thought."

Hiccup helped prepare dinner, teaching Ingrid how best not to burn the fresh loaf over the fire. It was only something simple tonight, a creamy vegetable stew- Aloe still refused meat- and warm, buttered bread. Like all young women, Ingrid was learning to cook and other household management skills. Some parts of it went alright, as long as you excused food poisoning, dust under the rug and belongings shoved under the bed and/or stuffed in the cupboards. Ingrid didn't have time to run a household. She was too busy training, too much like her mother.

Tuffnut arrived first, still grumpy. Hiccup cheered him up a little by saying he had a potential date on the line, "I just need a bit more time to finalise a few things. Only a couple of days, don't worry. I've got this."

"Thanks, H."

"Anytime." Hiccup playfully slugged Tuffnut in the shoulder. A knock at the door stopped their playfight before it truly began.

"Ruff?"

" _Tuff_?" The twins were at a stalemate, staring at each other as though it had been a hundred lifetimes since they last saw each other. Hiccup and Astrid watched eagerly, slyly grinning at each other. Ingrid rolled her eyes and stirred the stew.

As one, the twins gave excited, wordless exclamations and surged towards each other, ribs cracking and heads clonking as they fiercely hugged the other. Ruffnut was babbling apologies. Tuffnut said nothing, holding onto his sister as though his life depended on it. "I can't breathe." Ruffnut wheezed. Her brother pulled back. They grinned at each, spitting on their hands and shaking, smashing their heads together. Ruffnut laughed and socked him one straight in the gut.

"No-one punches as good as you, sis."

"Are we good?"

"We're twins. We're cool. Just don't ditch me again, OK?"

"I won't. Sorry, bro."

"Ah, the universe is once again in balance." Hiccup sighed happily. "Glad you two muttonheads are back on track. But dinner's burning and I'm starving."


	27. Chapter 27

**To Guest- *have a tissue***

 **To sofia- *you can have tissue too* but thank you! ^_^**

 **Why is everyone crying, I didn't mean to make people cry this time, I swear! I'm trying to be good! :P There is a plan here, it'll be nice. Mostly. Being good is so DIFFICULT, I DON'T LIKE IT.**

* * *

With the twins back on track and causing mayhem, Hiccup appointed Ingrid and Vadik co-chiefs of the Thorston-Twin-Clean-Up-Brigade or T-CUP for short. Astrid pestered Hiccup for news on this mysterious partner for Tuffnut when she was home; he wouldn't tell her anything. "Just give me a clue!"

"It's a woman."

"Holy spuds, I'd never have figured that out!" And she stomped off to see her father. Fenrir hadn't gotten any better and his ailments were starting to seep through the facade. He had a horrible cough, headaches and migraines raged through his skull at all hours of the day and night, his temper was even shorter than usual, but he wouldn't always remember losing it nor the things he said. He called Hiccup an unbelievably stupid one-legged toad and then asked what was for lunch without any recollection of insulting his son-in-law. Astrid often came home in the evenings, upset and frustrated. But she understood. It wasn't her father being so cruel and disrespectful; it was this illness, whatever the hell it was, that was making him like this.

Toothless crooned, bored. Hiccup turned in his seat, resting his arm across the back of it.

"Me too." He agreed. "I take it Stormfly has gone with Astrid?" Toothless huffed. "How about we go for a flight? Maybe go to the Edge, see how construction over there is coming along. You haven't seen Smidvarg and the gang for a while." The Night Fury perked up. Hiccup smiled.

"Whoa, hold on. Time out." Ingrid sauntered in. "If you're leaving for a few days, I'm in charge, right?"

"You and Alastor, yes." Ingrid scowled. Hiccup stood to swing his cloak about his shoulders. "It's not for long and you both need to learn, just in case things don't work out like you want them to."

"I might as well start my own tribe then." Ingrid grumbled sarcastically. Hiccup counted to three and then it hit her. "Bloody hell, I'm a genius. Screw you lot, I'm starting my own tribe, I'll chief them." Hiccup just bit his lip and smiled. Ingrid was off like a shot.

"What are the chances she calls this new tribe Ingrid-land or something?" Toothless snorted. "Maybe the Axe Maidens, who knows? That's got a pretty good ring to it; could be a band name. Want to be in a band, bud?" Toothless frowned. "You just want to get out of here, don't you?" In response, Toothless stomped off to fetch his saddle. "Let's go before anyone notices."

* * *

Alastor was most certainly _not_ happy when he learned his father had scarpered for a few days. Ingrid seemed alright with it, but she was more inclined to this new tribe idea- her own version of the Bog-Burglars, she had said, no boys. "Boys are annoying, they can never make a decision."

"I can make a decision." Vadik protested sulkily.

"Oh really?"

"I decided I want salmon for lunch rather than... whatever the hell it was you made." Her eyes flashed dangerously. "It's the thought that counts though, right? Right, Al? Help me." He hissed from the corner of his mouth. Alastor put a hand on his shoulder, looking him straight in the eye.

"It was nice knowing you."

"Dammit, Al." Alastor shone a lopsided smile his way and then flounced off, looking for his little sister. Vadik smiled sheepishly at Ingrid. "I really appreciate the gesture, promise."

"You could at least appreciate my cooking."

"I think we both know it's not that good."

"I'm learning, shut up!"

"Learn faster." A voice behind them pitched in. Orrick and Shamus appeared, grinning mischievously. Ingrid fumed and they too gained meek looks. "We don't pass up any opportunity for free food, cuz."

"You should know that by now." Shamus added.

"I am not giving either of you half-wits any of _my_ food."

"What if Ragnarok happened though and we were all that was left?" Orrick pouted dramatically, cooing slightly. Ingrid rolled her eyes.

"I'd let you both starve to death and harvest your bodies for meat." The Jorgenson boys paled, appalled and terrified. Vadik nodded seriously and they ran off. Ingrid rolled her head from side to side, cracking a crick in her neck. "I love tormenting them, they can be so gullible. Now, I need to find some decent people to be in my tribe."

"Actually, you've got to chief."

"I can do both, I'm a girl. Girls can multi-task."

"That's just a stereotype."

"So is women needing men."

"How are you supposed to have kids without us? Keep the family line running and all that responsible stuff."

"I don't want kids."

"No?"

"Kids are evil."

"Granted."

"And childbirth..." Ingrid made a face and Vadik laughed. "You wouldn't be laughing about it if you were a girl."

"Thankfully, I was born with the decent set of-"

"Finish that sentence and you lose it."

"Gods." Vadik hastily backed up. "Your cousins might be on to something with that running away thing."

"They're very good at it. And it's probably the only thing they're ever right about."

* * *

Alastor dropped by the work shop to see Gobber. Gobber was good to him, like an extra grandparent, but also like the crazy uncle no-one really wanted to admit being related to at Snoggletog. Gobber was trying to wake up Grump, threatening adoption for the billionth time. "And here's our acting-chief. One of 'em anyway. What can old Gobber do for you then, lad?"

"Hide me." Gobber chuckled.

"Aye, yer dad was just the same. Hated being acting-chief. Wasn't his thing." Gobber spun his rack of interchangable limbs and smiled crookedly. "Wanted to be off, out there, fixing that bloody map of his, finding new dragons." He twisted off his hook, Alastor took it for him. Gobber's smile turned fond. "Yer just like yer dad, laddy. Too restless. Yer wanna be on that dragon and out of here."

"I like Berk, don't get me wrong, but... chief? No. That's more... Dad's thing, Ingrid's thing, not mine."

"Nor mine." Gobber winked. "Yer've no idea how glad I am not to be one of you royals."

"I feel like a royal screw-up." Gobber just waved it off, selecting his hammer hand and fixing it in place with Alastor's help. "Why can't people just accept Ingrid as the heir? It's not... I was going to say science, but no-one takes that seriously, not with Ruff and Tuff running it." Gobber snorted, amused. "Maybe Ingrid's right with this new tribe thing- I should start my own and make it all-dragon, like Nana Val did."

"See? Yer running away from yer problems."

"I am not. I'm just... seeing them from a different perspective, that's all."

"Uh-huh." Gobber nodded. "Whether yer grow up to be chief or not, that fire ain't gonna keep itself burning." He motioned to the dying embers. Alastor whistled and Spike wormed his way in, his magnesium flare startling Grump momentarily from his slumber. Gobber shook his head. "Boy, I don't care what perspective you wanna take with all this, but don't run away from it. Berk is yer home, yer whole family's here."

"I know." Alastor sighed. "Maybe you could all come with me. The ones that are relatively nice to me anyway."

"Yer gonna get people who are arseholes, 'scuse my potty mouth." Alastor retrieved a badly bent sword from the pile of work Gobber had lined up, wincing at the sight of his grotesquely distorted reflection. He stuck it over the flames, back and forth with the blade, hot and cool, working as Gobber's apprentice as his father had done all those years ago. "Aye, yer gonna get people yer'll just wanna club about the head, but you can't always do it. Not with your status anyway."

"Yeah, 'cos that's a great status to have. The shrimpy son of Berk's greatest chief who couldn't even talk properly."

"You can now."

"Only because Gothi hypnotised me."

"Ah." Alastor hummed, turning the blade after every strike Gobber dealt. "As much as you're like yer dad, you're not him. Just like Hiccup wasn't and isn't Stoick." Gobber hefted a great shoulder. "We Vikings are a wee bit more open-minded now since Hiccup got his way. You be you, laddy, and you'll be surprised how many people will accept it." Alastor stayed quiet, watching the flames dance and snap before him, the heat trickling into his features. Gobber cleared his throat and he took the blade back; it was slowly starting to resemble a sword once more. The old blacksmith started to speak when someone else did.

"Um, hi." A girl of Alastor's age stood at the window, dark-haired and atheletically slim, earthy brown eyes fierce behind the tanned glow of her freckled features, dressed in a simple blue dress belted at the waist and striped leggings.

"Alva." Gobber beamed. "Ever a delight. Yer lookin' for yer dad's knives, eh?"

"Please, Gobber." The elder man hobbled off. Alastor stuck the blade in the cooling bucket, wiping his hands on his tunic. "Hey." Alva smiled, displaying an endearingly chipped front tooth.

"Uh... h-hey?" Alastor knew Alva, she was in his class, but she had never actually _spoken_ to him. He hadn't even been sure she had known he existed until now. Gobber was taking a long time with those knives.

"Nice Nadder." She nodded approvingly. "I've got one myself."

"I know. Trip." She did a double-take. Alastor tucked his hands behind his back, mentally kicking himself. "Uh, at least... that's what I've, um... you know, heard. And all."

"Are you OK?"

"Mm-hm." Spike ventured over to see who this new person was, shuffling his wings and squawking a greeting. "I think he likes you."

"I probably smell like chicken. You're very handsome, Mr. Nadder-whose-name-I-am-yet-to-learn." Alva shot the rider a pointed look. Alastor startled.

"Oh. He's, uh... he's Spike. 'Cos he has spikes." He mentally kicked himself. _No duh_! Rubbing at the back of his neck and wishing the ground would open up beneath him, he looked round for Gobber. "Um, just going to check... um, check where Gobber's gone." Alastor started backing away, wanting to turn away, but not sure if he should, was it rude, his dad would tell him off for turning his back on a lady, surely, but gods darn it, there seemed to more stuff that usual in this gods-forsaken death-trap of a workshop and it was all, apparently, under Alastor's feet.

Gobber was in the back room, shaking with silent laughter. "What are you doing?" Alastor hissed angrily. He spotted the knives on the desk instantly, all ready and waiting, shined and sharpened in their leather roll. Gobber took a moment to compose himself.

"Just reliving a few old memories. Here. Make yerself useful and take them to the wee lass out there." He dumped the roll in Alastor's arms unceremoniously, looking most amused.

"I don't know what game you're playing, Gobber, but I don't like it."

"Oh, no. No game, I promise yer, hand over heart." He hastily had to switch from attachment hand to flesh and smiled innocently. Alastor fumed silently and stalked back out. Gobber peeked around the doorway, watching as his young apprentice proceeded to trip over a bucket and scatter the knives everywhere. He snickered to himself. "Ah, like father like son. Attaboy, Al."

* * *

 **Not the chapter I originally had planned, but I thought I'd bring an idea or two forward a little.**


	28. Chapter 28

**I have a poll up with regards to possible future chapters, PLEASE VOTE! I ASKED NICELY! :D**

* * *

"Calm, _calm_ , find your happy place. No, don't do that. Find somewhere non-violent and _calm_ , just think of that. Like, uh... uh..." Vadik faltered.

"Toothless's cove." Alastor suggested helpfully. Ingrid scowled at them both and lobbed her axe. Thankfully, away from any living creature, although the two boys couldn't help but feel sorry for the practise dummies she had lined up. "What happened this time anyway?"

"Oh, the usual thick idiots, you know how it is." Ingrid stomped on the handle of a war hammer, snatching it from the air and hurling it straight across the arena. It smashed through target boards and gave a resounding _crack_ against the stone wall. Vadik handed Alastor a shield, keeping his own up before his face. Alastor took a minute to get a proper hold on his shield, eventually hefting it up and propping it on one of the barrels. "When did Mum say Dad will be back?"

"Um... she didn't, but... she went to look for him."

"Who's looking after Aloe then?"

"Fishlegs and Heather. I think they quite enjoy having a non-troublesome Haddock in the house." Vadik smiled. "Quite a rarity if I'm frank with you both."

"You're not Frank, you're Vad." Alastor frowned. "No, wait. I just got that. Ignore that." Vadik grinned cheekily. Alastor had been a little flustered and confused the past couple of days, but no-one really knew why. Although Gobber seemed to have something to do with it. Alastor sighed. "I think I'll head home now, I need a lie down."

"You sound like you've aged fifty years in the last twenty-four hours." Ingrid teased. Her brother just hummed, waving to his Nadder. "You alright, bro?" She felt his forehead just in case.

"'M fine. Tired. I am not cleaning any of this up though." He gestured at the mess she had made. Vadik clapped him on the shoulder.

"I'll handle things here. You go and get some kip, mate, you look like you could use it." Alastor nodded his thanks blearily, scrambling up into the saddle. "He's got that look." Vadik observed happily as soon as the other was gone. Ingrid raised a brow, sharpening her knives against each other. "You know, that totally mystified look when there's a girl involved." This didn't seem to register with her, so he tried again. "That daft look your dad does when your mum's around."

"Oh. Wait... Al can't have a girlfriend!"

"Not gonna lie, but if I was a girl, I wouldn't mind a bit of that." Ingrid snorted and then slapped his arm.

"Vadik!" She scolded. "That's my brother you're talking about, leave him alone!"

"He's adorable though! I just want to squidge his face, he's so... squidgy."

"He's not squidgy, he's... I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you. Leave my brother alone; squidgy or not, Alastor is not going to appreciate being called _adorable_."

"But he's the only one I can call adorable without having my head ripped off or a six year old clamped to my leg. I know she's only little, but Aloe can definitely pack a punch. Nearly fell down the stairs the other day."

"Yeah, she told me." Ingrid snickered. "Ah, she's a good 'un."

"Because she tried to kill me?"

"Partly."

"That's just... really inconsiderate, why do I even bother with you half the time?"

"Uh, that's pretty obvious, you muttonhead. I am the most fun you are ever going to get out of Berk."

"And you still won't help me get a dragon."

"Tough pigeon."

* * *

"Surprise, surprise." Astrid muttered to herself. "I knew I'd find you here!" She called as she landed. Toothless beamed gummily and bounced towards them, chortling merrily. He accepted a scratch under the chin from Astrid before engaging his best friend in a game of tag. Hiccup was sat at the edge of the cliff, legs dangling over the side.

"What took you so long?" He smiled crookedly as she took a seat next to him. His arm went around her waist and she placed her head against his shoulder. "I think we should run away more often." He mumbled into her hair, planting a sweet kiss atop her head. Astrid let a smile tug at her lips.

"Maybe. I quite enjoy the peace and quiet."

"You don't get much of that back on Berk."

"But I like the hustle-bustle too." She continued, rolling her head to look up at him. "Can't say the same about this though." Running a finger along his jawline, over the stubble. Hiccup chuckled and squeezed her playfully. "It looks better from a distance. Like the rest of you."

"Oh, _rude_!" Astrid shone an angelic look his way, shifting as to play with his hair. Hiccup's gaze travelled over her face, determined to formulate some kind of response, only to dim without inspiration. She tied off a braid and let him fall forward against her shoulder. "I _am_ growing this beard." He defied. Astrid curled her lip distastefully. She still couldn't imagine him with one. He laughed softly, envisioning her response. Astrid squirmed as his breath tickled her neck; his arms went around her and he fell back, mere inches from falling over the edge with her. She could feel his heartbeat against her own, trying to evade any stubble-plagued kisses and plummeting to her death. Laughter rumbled through him, warming her face. "I'm not going to let you fall. I'm not mean like you."

" _Mean_?" She protested, secretly satisfied at the disappearance of his smile and the look of terror in its place. " _I_ am _mean_?"

"You've shown traits on occasion." He mumbled apologetically. "I swear, I meant it in the most endearing way-"

"Little bugger! Stormfly!" She called. The Nadder rolled to her feet, standing to attention. "Catch!" And with that, Astrid rolled them both off the cliff. The dragons hollered in alarm and raced after them, both diving off regardless. Astrid pushed herself away from Hiccup, cheering and laughing. Stormfly swept under her, chirping with relief. A shadow rockected past them, Toothless's locked tail causing him distress. Hiccup just stared up at Astrid, highly unimpressed with his arms folded. Toothless managed to catch his rider at the last second, by the one remaining leg, beating his wings to stay airborne. He cooed at his human and then roared up at Astrid, displeased.

"That was one of those traits I was talking about." Hiccup said casually when they regrouped. Toothless growled at Astrid. "Easy, bud." Hiccup soothed. Astrid leaned against Stormfly, watching her husband comfort his Night Fury. "She's just a big meanie, yes she is, we don't need to worry about her, no. We'll beat her in a race any day."

"Ooh, is that a challenge, _Haddock_?"

"It is indeed, milady. But we'll understand if you're not up to it, what with being second best and all." He grinned slyly as her competitive streak erupted.

"Challenge accepted. First to the Edge wins."

"And the loser?"

"Well, he'll have to get rid of that gods-forsaken _beard_ to start off with."

"Hey, don't put that in air quotes, it's a working progress. Loser has to grant any three requests of the winner, and none of that asking for more requests business, you nearly killed me then too."

"It wasn't like you were moving a mountain."

"Bloody felt like it."

* * *

 **This is a filler chapter for now, I need to bridge some time until the actual idea chapter that'll go back to Ruff and Tuff. Don't forget to vote!**


	29. Chapter 29

Astrid had helped Ruffnut prepare dinner for Eret and then snuck outside. Hiccup was already waiting, grinned when he saw her. From their hiding place in the bushes, they saw Eret saunter up the path and stumble in, yawning. They heard him mumble, crawling to hide under the window instead, peeking through. Eret had his back to them, planting a hello kiss on Ruffnut's cheek.

"What's all this then?" He smiled.

"Dinner. Made it myself."

"It looks lovely, but you didn't have to." Ruffnut just shrugged. Eret took a seat and she set his plate before him. Hiccup nodded to himself; so far so good. Ruffnut gave a timid half-smile as she sat opposite her husband, angling herself discreetly to keep her two friends in sight. "Did you sort things with your brother?"

"Yup." Ruffnut grinned. "He's coming over for dinner tomorrow."

"Why not today? This is amazing!" Eret praised. Ruffnut shone a cheeky grin his way. "Ah. Too good to share, eh?"

"Something like that."

"Are you alright, my queen?" Hiccup and Astrid grinned slyly. Ruffnut glared and they had to duck as Eret turned to see what she was glowering at. "Ruff?"

"Eret, I'm sorry. I just wanted to do one last nice thing before you left."

"I'm leaving?" Hiccup frowned. _Not going to plan_! He mentally yelled, trying to channel his thoughts to his friend. "Why am I leaving?"

"Well... I went to see Gothi and... um... there's a, uh... slight problem and..." Hiccup and Astrid peered over the window ledge. Ruffnut had pushed her dinner away, biting her lip to try and abate the tears. Chair legs scraped against the stone floor as Eret rose, moving round calmly and taking her in his arms. Ruffnut hid her face against his chest, the one bit of solidity in her life. Astrid gripped Hiccup's fingers, as worried for her friend as Ruffnut was for losing Eret. They could hear a slight murmur, a sniffle. They had to hide again as Eret turned his head.

"Whatever it is, I'm sure we can work around it together. I'm not going anywhere."

"You might."

"I made a vow to you and I shall treasure that until my dying day."

"Why aren't you this romantic?" Astrid breathed, pinching her husband's arm. Hiccup pouted.

"I'm not soppy." He whispered, barely audible. Astrid rolled her eyes and put a finger to her lips. Hiccup stuck his tongue out.

"Please don't get mad, Eret, but... I can't... have kids and-"

"And that's going to stop me loving you?" Eret shook his head. Hiccup got another pinch so he sent one straight back. With his attention on his wife, Hiccup and Astrid found it safe to watch the pair again. "My queen, please. I'm not shallow." Ruffnut opened her mouth to speak, but Eret shushed her gently. "I know I said I'd like for us to have children, but if that's not to be, then that's alright."

"Is it?"

"Well, keeping an eye on your brother is like looking after a toddler, so..." Eret hunched his shoulders. "But don't you _ever_ think I'll stop loving you. And stop glaring at Hiccup and Astrid."

"I'm not!"

"You are!" Hiccup protested, jumping to his feet and wagging an accusing finger at her. Astrid face-palmed and sighed. "Oh wait... You didn't see anything." He told Eret and hid again, too little too late. Astrid flicked him, mouthing several curse words. "We should probably go. Ow! Hey!" Ruffnut had moved to the window and bopped him on the head too. "I'll remember this when either of you want one my brilliant plans." The women just hummed. Eret laughed.

"Ah, mate, that's not going to work." He joined his wife at the window, smiling at the other pair.

"You two going to be OK?" Astrid asked, standing. Ruffnut glanced hesitantly at Eret who grinned wickedly. Astrid took that as a 'yes'. "Excellent. Eret, give this dork a few lessons on romance, will you?"

"I can romance!" Hiccup insisted. Astrid scoffed. "Fine. I'll romance you into the ground; this is war, Eret."

"Aren't you always saying not everything has to be a competition?"

"And this isn't everything, just the art of romance."

"Mmm." Eret looked amused. "Yeah, I'm going to win." Hiccup blew a raspberry. "Maybe it's not just Tuff that's an overgrown toddler, hey? How about you go and romance Astrid somewhere else, I need to talk to my wife. Nothing bad, don't look so worried." Eret promised, smiling kindly at Ruffnut. Hiccup began a sarcastic comeback, but was cut short by Astrid dragging him away.

"Well, that's one thing off the to-do list."

"How did he even know we were there? We're stealthy." Astrid raised a brow at this. "Fine, _you're_ stealthy. I blame this." He stopped and pointed at his metal foot. "With all honesty though, I'm as romantic as I can be. It's not my fault Eret has more time on his hands. I'd say how about we go away for a weekend at some point, but Alastor might just kill me for that. Or at the very least maim me." Astrid sighed. "Are you mad? That looks like your mad face."

"I'm always mad. Especially at you." He smiled sweetly. "Why don't you go and see Tuff?"

"I'll do one better. _You_ go and see Tuff while _I_ arrange his date. Can you make sure he's, you know, clean? Like bath, clean clothes, ecetera."

"For when?"

"Not tomorrow night, the night after."

"Right. And your plan would be?" Hiccup pressed his lips together. "Can you at least tell me _who_ his date is?" A slight shake of the head. Astrid grumbled a series of choice words and marched off. Hiccup had to make this up to her later. Maybe he should pull a few romance cards from his deck. He could romance. He could romance better than Eret. Romance wasn't that hard. Romance was easy peasy potato squeezy. Never squeeze a potato. For starters, it wasn't always easy. Secondly, if it worked, it made a wee bit of a mess.

Mentally slapping himself, he got his thoughts back on track.

"Sort the date out, Hiccup." He told himself. "Potatoes and romance later."

* * *

 **I was going to do one long chapter to sort both of the twins' issues, but I'm spreading it out over a series of chapters instead. Then I'll do a time-skip and work on the other ideas! Ooh, big plans for this one! ^_^**


	30. Chapter 30

**I have a poll up and I shall close it on Sunday. Please vote! :D**

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Hiccup made his way up the hill, huffing irritably. He was stumped on this romance thing- he had brilliant ideas, but Astrid would only see it as him trying to out-romance Eret, there was no way he could compete with that, not when she was in this frame of mind. Maybe he was better at matchmaking than romance, but hey. His talents had to end somewhere. For now though, he would get Tuffnut's date, make sure she was still alright with this latest scheme. He knocked on the door, "Hello!" he called. Waited a few seconds. Vadik answered. "Hey, Vad. Your mum in?"

"Yeah." Vadik turned. "MUM! IT'S HICCUP!" Vadik looked back. "Everything OK?"

"Dandy. Plus- hey, Vad. You going out?"

"Oh, I'm not wanted now?"

"Just for a little bit. Ingrid's around." Hiccup smiled innocently. Vadik bit his lip. "Go and pester her for that dragon." He suggested. Vadik pursed his lips.

"She won't."

"I've a feeling she will this time."

"You told her to?"

"I've hidden her axe. She's not allowed it back until she helps you get that dragon."

"And if she finds it?" Hiccup grimaced. Vadik laughed. "Fair enough." Hiccup stood to one side and Vadik sprinted off down the hill. Ada came down the stairs, wiping her hands on her apron. She invited him in, apologising for Vadik not doing so. "That boy's mind is all over the place."

"Teenagers." Hiccup agreed. "I'm glad mine aren't there just yet."

"Ooh, just you wait."

"I'd rather not, but I'm not here to talk about teenagers. Are you free the night after tomorrow night?"

"Um, yes. Why?"

"Who's your favourite chief?"

"You didn't!"

"I did!" Hiccup beamed. Ada flushed crimson. "Ah, there's no getting out of it. I've got Astrid on bath time duty, Tuff is gonna be _clean_ for this date."

"Does he know it's me?"

"Not yet. But he will." She smiled bashfully, running her hands over her braid. Hiccup couldn't help but smile. He knew the _second_ Tuffnut asked him for help who to set him up with; Ada had crushed on the twin big time _forever_ ago, but she had always been too shy. When Hiccup first confronted her about it, she was adamant that she wasn't. A little Hiccup magic and she admitted _everything_. "He's just so funny and clever. In his own way, you know, he's really underappreciated. And he has really nice hair too, I love his hair." She loved Tuffnut's creativity, he's eccentric nature, absolutely everything about him and Tuffnut had absolutely no idea. She kind of reminded Hiccup of himself when he was a teenager and fancied Astrid, just not necessarily a teenager. And he had thought it all through, he wasn't just doing this to cheer Ada up. She would be a source of stability for Tuffnut, he would bring out confidence in her, she would put him on the right path to express his beloved creativity effectively, he would make her laugh. They balanced each other out perfectly; this was far too good an opportunity to pass up, this was matchmaking gold. "Now," Hiccup said, placing a hand on her shoulder, "dig out your nicest dress, do your hair- I can get Astrid to do one of her fancy braids, give me a break." Ada giggled, bouncing on the soles of her feet excitedly. Hiccup grinned.

"Thank you!" She exclaimed, throwing her arms around him. Hiccup laughed.

"You're most welcome."

* * *

Astrid had managed to get Tuffnut to bathe and had trimmed his hair a bit, keeping it long because that's what he liked, tidied and braided exactly in his style. He was trying to glean any information from her about this mystery date of his, but she was as clueless as he was. "Sorry, Tuff, but Hiccup's being really secretive about this. I suppose we'll find out when she turns up."

"What if she doesn't turn up though?"

"I'm sure she will. Whoever Hiccup's found would have to be a complete muttonhead not to." Tuffnut still worried. "Does Ruff know about your date?"

"No..."

"Why?"

"I want to see how it goes first." Astrid nodded. She was busy rummaging in Tuffnut's trunk, trying to find something that wasn't stained or burnt or torn. He was sat at the table behind her, vigorously polishing his helmet under her instructions. "How do you think it'll go?"

"Honestly, I think it'll go really well." Tuffnut looked up interestedly. "Well, think about it. Whoever Hiccup found, it won't just be anyone, she'll be... I'm going to say perfect for you or at the very least, a good laugh. I know I say this alot, but despite him being an idiot, he does know what he's doing. Don't tell him I said this, but he's a pretty good matchmaker." Tuffnut hummed, plopping his elbow on the table and frowning.

"What if she's alright and I mess it up?" Astrid slammed the chest shut and turned, sitting on it. She simply folded her arms and glared at him. Tuffnut furrowed his brow. "Astrid, come on. This is me we're talking about here, I mess everything up."

"That's not strictly true." He shot her a defiant look. "What about when the Edge was under attack? I couldn't have defended it without you."

"That was years ago."

"And now you're part of my security system for Berk. Right?"

"Right." He muttered.

"Then stop being so negative." She jumped up. "We're going to the tailor's." He looked puzzled. "You are not meeting this date looking like a tramp, get up." She marched over and snatched up his helmet, inspecting his work. "Not bad." She pulled her sleeve over her hand and rubbed at a stubborn patch. "What is that?"

"It's been there for ages, don't worry about it." He took it back and sat it lopsidedly on his head. "Do we have time for the tailor's?"

"Oh, he'll make time. Let's go."

* * *

 **ADA. THERE WILL BE PROGESSION OF THIS, DON'T WORRY. IT WILL WORK.**

 **Don't forget to vote! ^_^**


	31. Chapter 31

**I've extended voting time until Tuesday, seeing as I've only got two votes that haven't helped me make up my mind :P VOTE.**

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"You two are creeps." Snotlout said flatly. Hiccup and Astrid shushed him, Astrid motioning for him to get down. Rolling his eyes and mentally questioning why he was doing this, he hid in the bushes with them. "Waiola told me you were spying on Ruff and Eret and now you're spying on Tuff and... whoever his date is going to be." Snotlout eyed them warily. "You two haven't got some sort of twin fetish, do you?"

"I'd love to have been a twin." Hiccup said wistfully. "An identical twin, obviously. I don't think I'd be here now if I had a twin like you." He nodded at Snotlout, who frowned. "I mean, proper Viking-like. Ooh, there she is! Shut up you two!" He added, even though neither of his companions had made a sound. Tuffnut was already sat at the top of cliff, fidgeting in his new attire and tugging on his hair. Astrid had made him a little _too_ tidy, but first impressions were everything, particularly when they didn't know who would show up. He had a hamper of food, prepared by Astrid and Waiola, a few lanterns burning around them as the sun gradually set. That had been Eret's idea. Hiccup _really_ had to step up his romancing skills now, but tonight was about Tuffnut and Ada.

Astrid and Snotlout both punched Hiccup when they saw who this mysterious date was; she proceeded to give him a hissed lecture. Snotlout clamped hands over their mouths and watched earnestly. Tuffnut jumped to his feet upon hearing an approach, just as surprised to see her as his friends were. Hiccup spat on Snotlout's hand, knee-jerk reaction kicking in instantly. "Come on, Tuff. Remember what we talked about..." He breathed. Astrid slapped Snotlout's hand away.

"We are having words later." Astrid snarled under her breath, glaring at her husband. Hiccup smiled sheepishly.

Tuffnut, as planned, greeted Ada with a slight bow, taking his helmet off. He took a seat after she had, offered her a drink, some food. Ada started playing with her hair so Hiccup whistled. A shower of Terrors swooped over them, mouths full of sparkling flames. Ada hit Tuffnut's arm excitedly, beaming up at the dragons. Astrid and Snotlout stared at the chief in awe.

"What?" He puzzled. "I told you I've got a few tricks up my sleeve, now shush." Tuffnut had coaxed a Terror to the picnic, the others watching from a distance dubiously. Hiccup reached into the satchel he had brought with him, rising to his feet. "I'll be back in a bit." He whistled again. All, but one Terror, followed him eagerly, chasing the food in his bag. Astrid and Snotlout simultaneously shook their heads and turned back to the date before them. Tuffnut, with Hiccup's help, had planned the Terrors' arrival and departure, except for the one on Tuffnut's arm- this one had been specially trained to stick around and perform a few tricks for Ada, a _huge_ fan of the little trouble-makers.

They couldn't really hear what was being said, but the closer the sun got to the horizon, the better things seemed to be going. The pair were no longer sitting either side of the picnic blanket, moving closer; the Terror was snoozing in Ada's lap; they were sharing food, jokes and stories, conversation flowing as easily as water over rocks. Hiccup had returned, grinning victoriously and proudly. "Taught him everything he knows. Ah man, I can't wait for the wedding!"

"Don't you think you're getting a wee bit ahead of yourself?"

"No."

Down below, out of earshot of the spying trio, Tuffnut spun a couple of Hiccup impersonations, Ada spitting out her watered down mead in her laughter. "Ada, can I ask you something?" She smiled and nodded encouragingly. "How much did Hiccup pay you to do this?" Her smile faltered and she looked confused.

"Pay me? Why would he pay me?" Tuffnut hesitated. "Ooh, I get it. Hiccup told me about this, you think you're undateable, right?"

"Eeehh, something along those lines." He massaged the back of his neck awkwardly. "Why are you here then?"

"Because I wanted to be."

"You did?"

"Yes, I did. I do."

"Why though?"

"Well... the thing is I've kind of had a, um, fancy for you for some time now, so... when Hiccup said you'd asked him to, er, use his matchmaking skills and asked if I wanted to, you know, do this, then... anyway, here I am." She smiled brightly, face crimson. Tuffnut sat up a little straighter.

"Let me get this straight- you like _me_? _Like._ " He paused. " _Like_. _Me._ Are you crazy?"

"No, but you are." She replied dreamily. Tuffnut did a double take. Ada startled, brushing her hair hurriedly from her face. "It's endearing."

"I don't like being endearing."

"Gathered. But I still find you endearing." He pursed his lips. Ada twisted a strand of hair around her forefinger, chewing her lip. "I can't help it, OK? I know I probably shouldn't be saying this because I'll look like a total muttonhead, but by Thor's mighty hammer, you really make me laugh." Tuffnut raised a brow at this. "And... you're just completely off your rocker, this whole Loki thing... I love it, it's brilliant. I wish I could attempt half of the things you do."

"Ah, so you seek to learn from the master?" Tuffnut leant forward interestedly. Ada shifted to fully face him, disgruntling the Terror and making him stomp away. She nodded enthusiastically. Tuffnut grinned. "You are now my apprentice. Welcome to the path of Loki!" He held his hand out, they shook on it. Despite his rough skin, his touch was warm and surprisingly gentle, his smile nowhere near as friendly, crooked and bursting with mischief. "I say this date has been a success. Care for another?"

"OK! But let's make sure that lot aren't spying on us next time." They both looked up the hill, just in time to see Hiccup and Astrid roll from behind it, wrestling. Snotlout appeared a second later, half-despairing and half-laughing at the chaos before him. "Um, maybe we should help-"

"Lesson Number One- if there is trouble abrewing that you didn't make, don't interrupt. It could be glorious."

"I kind of owe Hiccup a favour though." He hummed thoughtfully, pulling irritably at his hair.

"Just this once then." He jumped up, offering his hand to help her up. Ada beamed, heart thudding against her ribs. She just had a date with Tuffnut! And there was going to a second, she hadn't messed it up! She was so proud, excited and relieved, she missed her footing up the hill, nearly face-planting. Tuffnut caught her around the waist easily. "You OK?" He chuckled.

"Just a bit of a klutz. It's all good."

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 **Another filler, I may do one more and then go on to the actual idea I had. VOTE! RIGHT NOW, GO AND VOTE! YOU HAVE UNTIL TUESDAY!**


	32. Chapter 32

**HAS ANYONE WATCHED THE GRAVITY FALLS FINALE? I CAN'T EVEN**

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Hiccup looked at his children now, their subdued faces aimed at the floor, each as distressed as the next. Sat in a row against the wall. Ingrid with her axe, knuckles white. Alastor staring blankly at the pages of his book. Aloe cuddling Bob, her flower crown lopsided, petals dribbling over her curls. Hiccup stood before them, leaning against the table in the Hofferson house. Astrid was upstairs. With her parents. Every so often, they could hear Fenrir's racking coughs-turned-chokes, making Hiccup's chest ache sympathetically. Ingrid drew her knees up, axehead thudding into the floorboards between her feet. Alastor glanced over at her, finally closing his book and setting it aside.

"Do we have to sit here?" He asked quietly. "We want to see Grampa Fenrir."

"I know." Hiccup sighed. Aloe sniffled, stopping his words short. He pushed away from the table to kneel before her. Bob squeaked sadly, wiggling from his owner's arms. Aloe still didn't look up, curling up just like her older sister, hiding her face in her arms. Hiccup shifted closer, cradling her to his chest. Neither said anything, Aloe burrowing against his shoulder. Bob paced back and forth, eventually winding his way into the embrace.

A door creaked, light flooding the stairs. Astrid stood at the top, expression hard and stony. She managed a single nod to her husband, leaving the door open behind her. Hiccup kept Aloe with him, offering his hand to Ingrid. She didn't take it, dipping her chin to her shoulder. "Ingrid." Hiccup said softly, pulling Alastor up instead. The boy looked eerily pale, clutching the book just as fiercely as his sister her axe. "Take your sister up. We'll be there in a minute." Alastor nodded. Aloe clung to him like a leech, big iridescent eyes tearfully watching them. "Ingrid." Hiccup said again, taking a seat beside her. "He's waiting for you up there. He wants to see you all." He paused, trying to glean any reaction from her. "You won't be alone."

"He might be though." She croaked.

"In Valhalla?" A tiny nod. Hiccup blew a raspberry, surprising her. "I doubt that. Fenrir was a commander of a squadron, he'll know plently of other warriors. Even though we don't do it anymore, he was one of the greatest dragon-killers, my dad always told me about Fenrir Hofferson." He switched to an impression of his father. " _If I had a hundred Fenrir Hoffersons, I could have some time to teach you how to throw an axe_. Bear in mind, I couldn't even _lift_ the stupid thing, even at your age." Ingrid smiled weakly. "So he won't be alone over there. But let's make sure he's well and truly not alone here, now. Yeah?"

"Yeah." Hiccup stood, hauling her up. She wrung the axe nervously. "Stay with me?"

"Of course." Hiccup smiled. He went up first, hearing her footsteps padding up behind him.

"You took your time." Fenrir growled, voice hoarse.

"Just giving you some time to prepare to bask in my glory." His father-in-law rolled his eyes. Astrid and Hildegard sat either side of him, Aloe on his knee and Alastor at his feet. Ingrid peeked around her dad. Fenrir smiled at her.

"I was wondering where'd you got to, lass."

"Eh. Just moping." Hiccup nodded at Ingrid to join the others.

"Hiccup, have you still got that scroll?"

"Yes, sir." Hiccup reached into his jacket and pulled it out. Astrid scowled and glared at the wall away from it. Fenrir nodded and Hiccup put it away. The older man coughed hackingly into his fist. Aloe startled, hurriedly giving him her flower crown.

"It'll make you feel better!" She insisted.

"I appreciate the gesture, m'wee lass."

"I'll make more! Make you _really_ better!" Fenrir started to reply, a bout of violent coughing nearly dislodging Aloe from his lap and knocking his new headwear ascrew. Aloe straightened it quickly.

"Aye, if that were only the case."

"What?" Aloe's bottom lip trembled. "It won't work?"

"Not this time, lass. I've a job for you though." Fenrir added as tears began to fall down the child's face. "Make some for everyone, eh? Give them something to smile about." He glanced over at Hiccup, grinning slyly. "And a pink one for yer dad." Aloe giggled, wiping at her face.

"But red's my colour." Hiccup frowned childishly.

"Not anymore." Fenrir smirked. "Alastor." His only grandson looked up, chewing his lip. "Ingrid. Whichever of you two becomes chief, know I'm proud of you and that I know you'll both do a wonderful job. Probably better than your dad, seeing as you've got Hofferson blood." They both smiled timidly. "Hiccup. I can't believe I'm going to say this, but carry on being an idiot."

"Done." Hiccup agreed, grinning. Fenrir sighed, lounging back against his pillows. Hildegard touched his cheek gently. Astrid roughly wiped her nose on the back of her hand. Fenrir looked at them all individually, an arm around his wife and the other around his daughter. Hiccup felt his smile slipping, moving forward to stand at the end of the bed. Fenrir smiled at them all, seemingly tired all of a sudden, breaths coming short and sharp, but as quietly as he could manage.

"Read it, Hiccup. As we said. Make sure they know. You three," He addressed his grandchildren before him, "are a crazy bunch, but thank Thor you're part of this family." To Astrid, "Chickety, you're so like your uncle Finn, I'm so proud of you." Astrid bit her lip, resting her head on his shoulder. Fenrir touched his cheek to her hair, looking at his wife. Hildegard held his hand in both of hers. "You were my friend long before you were my bride. By my side through every discomfort, every injury, every single up and down; you've given me everything- a home, a daughter, stability... I can't thank you enough."

"You don't have to." Hildegard replied, voice trembling amongst her smile. "I've enjoyed every second of it."

"As have I." Fenrir squeezed her fingers. He sat for another minute, wordless except for the scroll in Hiccup's jacket, eyes lingering on each of them, memorizing the details, the rough edges... whatever aspect he could pull from the individuals at his side until the last moment, pride swelling in his chest. His wife, his beautiful, cheeky, amazing wife, was his life companion, she had nursed him through thick and thin, through dragon attacks and enemy raids, waiting for him when he returned from hunting or battles. She always, _always_ gave him this big, dazzling smile when she saw him, hugged him, said she missed him. Fenrir would miss her. He would miss them all, but her most of all. Without her, going on by himself, it was such a hideous, terrifying thought. It had plagued the little sleep he gained, the waking moments in between. But he knew they would see each other again. He had eternity in Valhalla and so would she. And if she didn't join him there, he would scale the World Tree just to find her again. They would never be apart.

Astrid, his little chickety, so much like her mother, a warrior from the moment she was born. Came out kicking and screaming, wielded an axe before she could even crawl. Stoick had given it to him, defeated by his son's insistence to use it as a paperweight. Fenrir had found baby Hiccup hilarious. Not in the way some of the other Vikings did, mocking the wee lad, but Hiccup had genuinely amused him. When Astrid first admitted she _liked_ the Haddock boy, Fenrir could not have been happier. He couldn't care less that his only child had picked the most un-Vikingly Viking in the Archipelago. He had never seen Astrid smile so much, had never seen her happier or more relaxed than when she was around Hiccup. His brave little girl had grown into a fierce and determined young woman just as beautiful as her mother, the perfect daughter, everything he had ever hoped for. Maybe he hadn't been the best father, had been a bit harsh with her training, but seeing her now, it had all been worth it. His teachings would go on to her own children.

He remembered feeling Ingrid kick for the first time, he felt as giddy as he imagined Hiccup to be all the time. Then two more came along. Ingrid was a carbon copy of her mother, sans her father's darker hair. Fenrir hoped she partnered up with that Vadik boy. It seemed Hofferson girls took a liking to idiots- or at least the good kind of idiots. Then Alastor, that boy was his father through and through. He would go on to do great things, he was sure of it. And Aloe, sweet little Aloe, the floral princess with wild dreams, a heart of gold and a smile so cheery and loving, it swept everyone off their feet, disarmed them of all temper and frustration. He blinked, taking one last look at them all. Then he let sleep take him, feeling as though a great weight was being lifted from his old warrior shoulders. He need not worry about those he left behind. He knew that. They were his family, they were all fighters, all loyal and caring. He couldn't be happier or prouder knowing they would all go on to be the heroes of their own stories.

Life had been good, better than good, more than he ever deserved. He was a lucky, _lucky_ man.


	33. Chapter 33

Hiccup stood in the water with his wife, father and Gobber, all positioned around the small, yet elegant ship. The Hoffersons and Haddocks and some fellow Vikings lined the shore; the elder Hoffersons, Valka, Ingrid and Alastor armed with the traditional bows, arrows ready to light and shoot. Hildegard was on board, preparing her husband for the trip over and a final goodbye. She rested his helmet on his chest, his favoured sword at his side, planted a sweet, lingering kiss on his forehead once more. Stoick helped her down and Valka kindly took her underarm, offering what condolences she could. Hiccup couldn't see Astrid, he knew she was directly opposite him, but the craft was in the way.

Hildegard nodded. The ship was pushed out to sea. Hiccup splashed over to Astrid, her expression taut, eyes wet. She rested her head against his shoulder.

"Goodbye, Dad." She murmured. Hiccup, as chief, spoke next.

"May the Valkyries welcome you and lead you through Odin's great battle field." He said solemnly, letting his voice carry over the waters. "May they sing your name with love and fury so that we may hear it rise from the depths of Valhalla and know that you have taken your rightful place at the table of heroes. We've lost a brilliant man." He sighed. "A loyal warrior, a loving father, a friend and ally to the Berkian tribe." He nodded at the archers. Each had a small fire before them, dipping the arrowheads amongst the flames. "Fenrir Hofferson will not be forgotten." Astrid slid a grateful smile his way, a small crack in the facade. Hiccup bowed his head, setting a kiss to her temple.

The arrows were loosed, streaks of crimson and amber across the pink-tinged sky, raining down on the deck and mast. It took a moment for the flames to catch, burning through the dry wood as they did. Hiccup whistled- the Haddock Terrors swooped over the ship, sending sparking bursts of flames into the sky. The Nadders, Night Fury and other various dragons present did so too. Astrid tilted her head back, the flashes of fire and explosions dappling in the reflection on her dampened cheeks. Her lips moved soundlessly, gaze not leaving the tribute. Hiccup squeezed her briefly, acknowledging the gratitude.

They all remained until the ship touched the horzion. Hiccup and Astrid were the last in the water, Stoick and Gobber returning ashore to organise the mass of family. Valka and the grandchildren were comforting Hildegard and each other as best they could. Hiccup sent them a small, sad smile, keeping ahold of Astrid. She leant against him, fixated on the fiery dot slowly sinking away into the setting sun. It glowed for a split second when the sun vanished entirely then, it too, entered the other realm.

* * *

A feast was held in the Great Hall in Fenrir's honour. Hildegard and Astrid arrived last, arms linked. Hiccup, drip-drying before the fire, raised his arms to call silence to the Hall. "A toast!" He requested. "To Fenrir Hofferson." Mugs were raised all around. "May his spirit shine as brightly as the stars above, for now and ever more."

"Fenrir." The Vikings chorused, drinking. Hildegard and Astrid joined them, the elder woman sidling off to sit with Valka and a dozen or so other women. Astrid stood with Hiccup, shivering. He took her by the elbow, gently moving her towards the fire.

"Thank you."

"It's the least he deserved."

"He'd still call you an idiot for all of this."

"Of course he would." Astrid dragged her hand across her face and sniffed. "Hey." Hiccup said softly, fingers curled beneath her chin. "He'll be with his brother now, won't he?"

"Oh, Uncle Finn." Astrid smiled fondly. "I feel sorry for the Valkyries, Mum told me they were a pair of troublemakers in their younger years. Still had the habit if they wanted to."

"Is that so?" Hiccup mused. "Don't tell the twins."

"Which ones?"

"Both."

"Mummy?" Astrid felt a tug on her skirts and looked down. Aloe wiped her nose on her sleeve. "I made you this, Mummy." She held up a crown of wildflowers, a single red rose the centre piece. "Grampa Fenrir said to make them to make people happy. Gramma H has one." She half-turned and pointed. Hildegard had a similar headpiece, looking a little merrier. Astrid knelt, bowing her head to let her daughter bestow the crown upon her.

"I love it. Thank you, Aloe." Two shadows fell over her. Ingrid and Alastor joined them.

"Are you alright, Mum?" Ingrid asked tentatively as Astrid straightened, youngest in her arms.

"I'll be fine." She held an arm out, embracing her elder two as well. "I still get to drive you three crazy." Hiccup cleared his throat and gave her a pointed look. "You're crazy enough, you don't need my help."

"Daddy?" Aloe said, something dawning behind her eyes. "Daddy, what was that big letter Grampa Fenrir gave you?"

"Oh... uh..." Hiccup rubbed at his jaw awkwardly. "That was... something for later." He shot Astrid an apologetic look. She raised a brow. "Tomorrow morning." He answered quietly. He plucked Aloe from her mother's arms and plopped her in her sister's. "You three go and raid the buffet table before Snotlout discovers the salmon." The siblings shared looks and frowned. Hiccup frowned back until they slouched off. "Astrid-"

"No, it's alright. She's only little, she didn't know."

"I can postpone it if you want."

"No. Best to get it over and done with." She smiled, watery-eyed. "I want to know what the old codger had to say anyway." Hiccup retrieved the scroll from inside his jacket.

"I assure you, all nice things. About most of you."

"Did he tell cousin Joka to get a life?"

"Um... of sorts..."

"Joka had it coming." Astrid shrugged. "He needs a good kick up the-" Hiccup coughed not-so-subtley. Astrid tried for a glower, blinking too much. "I know he was ill. But... he should be walking through those doors, yell at the teenagers for being too rowdy, have some mead over there," she pointed to a far corner, "eat so much mutton, he'll struggle to move the day after." Hiccup touched her shoulder. "I don't know how I would have got through that without you, Hiccup. Thank you."

"I'm your husband. Through thick and thin, remember?" He offered his hand. Astrid took it. "He'll be having mutton-eating competitions with Finn now, all the mead in the nine realms at his disposal, having a good old laugh with Thor, I bet you." Astrid smiled weakly. "On the other hand, we should probably find some drier and warmer clothes, I think I've got frostbite on my foot."

"Oh gods, don't lose that one too."

"I'm trying not to."

* * *

 **I shall do the will tomorrow, I'm tired. Sorry guys, I've been decorating my room and movnig everything around, bloody heavy stuff, ugh D:**


	34. Chapter 34

**To Guest 1- Sorry ^_^**

 **To Guest 2- Hiccstrid! :D**

* * *

Sat at the table in the chief household, Hiccup looked around at the few Fenrir had put into his will. He had made a generalisation for the majority of his family to inherit assortments of weapons, money and anything Hildegard felt ready to be rid of. Those with Hiccup now included his parents, Hildegard, Astrid and the three kids. They had all been personally selected in the will, Fenrir had named them all in it, left them all a little message. Hiccup read aloud Fenrir's introduction, "I, Fenrir Oswald Hofferson- wait, his middle name was Oswald? I never knew that."

"Focus, Hiccup." Stoick said gruffly.

"Sorry." Hiccup said hastily. "Um... I, Fenrir Oswald Hofferson, entrust this will to the chief of the Hooligan tribe, Hiccup Haddock the Third- ah, he remembered!" Hiccup cleared his throat and hunched his shoulders defensively when his father glowered at him. "To my wife, Hildegard, a letter," Here, Hiccup retrieved a thick scroll tightly bound with a single strip of leather, "and, as to ensure her well-being, our home, wealth and respective lands." He handed the scroll over. Hildegard took it with a small nod of thanks, cradling it to her chest. "To my daughter, Astrid, I leave the axe she always wanted to play with as a child. Um, I don't have that with me right now," Hiccup told her, "Gobber's looking after it for me." He started reading again. "I also leave my armour to Astrid. It's a little too big for her, so I hope Hiccup will be able to recreate suitable armour for her from it." Astrid raised a brow at him. "It might take me a while, but I can do it. Uh... to Stoick, I leave my secrets of my constant success against him in our games. Here, Dad." Hiccup handed over another scroll. Stoick muttered a few things.

"I knew he was cheating, that slimy git." But he chuckled fondly as he surveyed the secrets. Valka tried to peer over his shoulder; Stoick simply turned his body.

"To Valka, I leave my mother's cookbook in the hope she will astound people forever more with her meals." Strangely, Fenrir had been the only one to enjoy Valka's cooking. Then again, he did have Astrid as a daughter. His taste buds were probably ruined. Hiccup tried to give his mother the treasured cookbook, but his stomach wouldn't let him let go. Astrid had to kick him under the table. He smiled apologetically. "To my eldest grandchild, Ingrid, I leave my collection of knives and daggers- your grandmother will know where to find them. Try not to kill/maim/skin anyone, you're training to be the first chieftess Berk has ever had in recorded history."

"Sweet." Ingrid grinned.

"To Alastor- as you're also training to be chief- I leave my very own Maces and Talons set. My grandfather made it for your great-grandfather and it has been passed down through the most of our generations. Your father didn't get this due to issues in previous years." Hiccup blew a raspberry. "But I hope he will teach you to play. Don't let him win too many times though, his head is big enough. Hey!" Hiccup protested. "Well then. Here, Al." He passed a wooden box over. Alastor immediately lifted the lid, staring in amazement at the collection of figures, the well-crafted board with the delicately hand-painted and almost realistic scenery. "Whether you become chief or not, I believe this game will prove rather enjoyable for you, you're a smart boy. See, Al?" Hiccup grinned. "What have we always told you?" Alastor shrugged, a little pink. "Last but not least, Aloe. I've gathered as many dyes, fabrics, threads, botany books and other creative instruments as I can. I had hoped to give it to you for your birthday, but the gods were not as kind to grant me this." Hiccup glanced under the table. "So that's what the big box is." By 'big box', it could have easily sat three or four Aloe's in it. Her face lit up when the lid was removed.

"Everyone's getting a crown!" She declared, diving over the side and rummaging through everything.

"Wait, why aren't you in there, Dad?" Alastor asked.

"I've already got my thing from Fenrir."

"What?"

"Well, I got to keep my head for marrying his daughter."

"That was _years_ ago." Astrid laughed. "Is that what he said to you?"

"Of sorts. He also gave me a sword, but it's... a bit heavy." Ingrid snickered. "I'd say it's about as tall as you, Ingrid, but practically everything is." She glared.

"I'm not _short_!"

"Just vertically challenged."

"Gramma H, can I have those knives please? I need to make sure they're sharp enough." She fumed at her father. Hiccup smiled sweetly. Hildegard just shook her head. Hiccup looked down at the will again, making sure he hadn't missed anything out. He unfurled the lower half.

"What's this?" He asked, sliding the parchment towards his father. Hildegard answered instead.

"That's a code."

"Oh!" Astrid smiled. "Hofferson code!"

"You guys have a code?" Hiccup marveled. "What does it say?"

"Ah, that's for a Hofferson to know and you to never find out."

"Well, you're a Haddock now." Astrid frowned. "I'll crack it." Hiccup vowed, rolling the will back up. "For now though, I think I'm supposed to play Maces and Talons. Al?"

"Give me that." Astrid made a grab for her father's will. Hiccup darted out of reach. "Hiccup!" Astrid scolded. Hiccup laughed challengingly, gave a frightened squeak and ran out the door, his wife on his heels. Hildegard smiled.

"He'll never change, will he?"

"I hope not." Ingrid muttered. "It's fun scaring Dad."


	35. Chapter 35

"How's it going?" Hiccup asked, bringing a pot of homemade stew- made by him, not Astrid- into the Hofferson household. Hildegard smiled weakly at him. "Your favourite." He prompted. Astrid worried her mother wasn't getting enough food as the days went on, turning into weeks. The only thing she attempted was Hiccup's stew. She may not eat all of it, but she still ate something. "You know, you can still take those knives back from Ingrid. She was doing target practise at breakfast. And at my head."

"Sorry."

"Sorry you missed it, more like." Hiccup smiled. "Now, where've you put those bowls today?" The house was far cleaner and tidier than Hiccup had ever seen it. He needed to give Hildegard a hobby. "I've heard the tailor is looking for some help. I know how much you love stitching. A shame Astrid hasn't got your skills though, she tried fixing one of my shirts and sewed the sleeve inside out. I don't know." He added at her bewildered look. "If I was wearing it, I would have to bend my arm in about four different places."

"Oh dear..."

"Yeah. Ah, bowls!" He declared victoriously, holding it up like a trophy. "Excellent! Num nums, mumma-in-law."

"Don't-"

"Too late." He filled the bowl and then the spoon. "Here comes the dragon." He teased. Hildegard's expression deadpanned. Hiccup put the spoon down, innocently pushing the bowl towards her. "And if you want more, just ask."

"Can't you give me the recipe?"

"No. A magician never reveals his secrets. Anyway, before I forget, going back to the tailor. He's got this apprentice who is the most _annoying_ person, apparently, and needs a good kick up the backside. I figured you could sort this kid out like that." He snapped his fingers. "And help the tailor out. Maybe you could start your own line of fashion, Astrid told me you used to design outfits."

"I did. I was trying to meld armour and clothing into a comfortable and protective article that allows the wearer to move easily. Unfortunately, it wasn't as easy as I'd anticipated."

"Have you tried Gronckle Iron?" Hiccup asked, dipping his finger in the stew and having a taste. "I am an _amazing_ cook."

"Fathead. And yes, I thought about Gronckle Iron, but there's a higher demand for weapons than clothes."

"Not armour clothes. You should do some prototypes. I'll test them for you if you want."

"Really?"

"I've already lost a leg, what else could go wrong?"

"Um, you could lose your head."

"Details, details." He waved it off. "Dig out that old sketch book, mumma-in-law. You're in business."

"You're completely off your rocker."

"Granted. Eat. I'll be back later to see your designs." He grinned encouragingly. "Put some red in there for me, though. Please? I think Astrid likes it when I wear red." Hildegard just hummed and shooed him away, eyeing the bowl of stew. Hiccup waited until she had consumed some before bowing and leaving. Astrid was waiting outside, saddled up on Stormfly. She started firing questions at him. Hiccup raised his hand and smiled. "It's OK." He promised, whistling for Toothless. "I think she's going to try for those armoured clothes you were telling me about." Astrid relaxed.

"Thank you. For some reason, she listens to you more than me."

"I'm the chief."

"No, that doesn't cut it with Mum."

"Oh. Maybe she loves me more then." Astrid's eyes flashed dangerously. Hiccup mounted the Night Fury, sheepishly smiling. "That definitely can't be it." He placated. "Haddock Charm." He decided. "That's the only other thing."

"Or your stew."

"It _is_ very nice." Hiccup nodded. Astrid rolled her eyes and her Nadder took off. "RACE!" Hiccup yelled. Toothless shot up, flipping past the women easily, brushing his claws gently along Stormfly's shoulder. She squawked and beat her wings, Astrid egging her on. "To the homestead!" Hiccup called over the roaring winds.

"No! I call full on race!"

"Hoho, she thinks she can wins! Challenge accepted, milady!" Hiccup pulled his helmet from a saddle bag, grinning as he put it on. "Bud, this is war. Let's go." Toothless rolled his shoulders, huffing determinedly. Hiccup adjusted the tail and they vanished into the clouds.

* * *

"Hey." Vadik said, plonking himself down on the doorstep.

"Hey." Ingrid mumbled, next to him. "Snapper's getting bigger." She pointed out, miserable. Her Changewing baby was pinker now, as long as her leg from tip to tail. He and Sneezy got along far better than any of them expected. "I might work in the dragon nursery, this is the second dragon I'm raising from an egg. You know, if this chief thing doesn't work out." Vadik bumped her with his shoulder.

"I'm sure it will. Al said he'd step down, didn't he?"

"Yeah, but does he really mean that or is he just saying it to make me happy?"

"Probably both." Vadik shrugged. "Where is he anyway? And Aloe?"

"Toothless's cove. Alastor's teaching her to swim." Ingrid sat back on her hands. Snapper crawled up her shin and rested on her knee, watching her curiously. "You're hungry again, aren't you? I swear he eats more than a full-grown Changewing." She motioned and the hatchling climbed onto her shoulder. "He can debone a haddock in two seconds though. Want to see?"

"I'm grossly fascinated. Let's do this." She gripped his shoulder, pushing herself to her feet, hauling him up afterwards. "Are you alright?" She shrugged. Snapper took this as a singal to climb onto her head. Ingrid sighed. Vadik smiled. "Hey, it suits you."

"I'll get him to debone you next."

"Ah, please don't. I kind of need them." She shook her head and disappeared inside. Snapper smelt food and got excited, trying to fly and nearly plummeting five feet and six inches onto his face. Vadik laughed as Ingrid scolded the dragon, having caught him by the tail. "Stupid reptile." She muttered. "Don't encourage him!" She reprimanded, punching her friend.

"Sorry." Vadik tried for a serious look. Snapper found the barrel of fish, clamping his gummy jaws on the tail of a haddock- apparently his favourite- and dragging it out, dropping it on the floor with a sickening, slimy _thwap_. He snuffled around it for a moment and then set his claws either side. Deboned in two seconds flat. "Wow." Vadik said, almost lost for words. "I know dragons can do that, but I've never seen it that fast or in a dragon that young."

"I've obviously taught him well." Ingrid smirked proudly. She dished another dozen fish for the little pest, calling for Sneezy. The Terror just dived into the barrel. Ingrid salvaged what fish she could for the other Terrors, leaving her own one in his crazy little world. "When do you want to go and get that dragon of yours then?"

"Oh, so you _want_ to help me now?"

"I'm bored."

"How considerate of you."

"I don't have to help you."

"Come on! It'll be fun! How about tomorrow afternoon? Instead of training, we'll go and get my dragon, maybe a romantic picnic, you can teach me how to fly-"

"Wait, go back to that last one."

"Teach me how to fly?"

"No. The one before that."

"Romantic picnic?"

"Why would I go on a romantic picnic with you?" She protested.

"You love me." At her furrowed brow, he laughed. "You just don't know it yet." She glowered. "OK, let's do this then. If we're married in... seven years or less, you owe me a... um... ooh! You owe me an apology _and_ admit that I was right! If not, then I will apologise and you can... have my favourite axe or something."

"I'll have your head."

"No, I'm not willing to bet that." She lunged. "No! Not now either!" She chased him around the table a few times before he remembered the door and scarpered. He ran into Waiola, who- despite finding it very entertaining- obliged and disarmed Ingrid.

"You can't kill him. He's under your dad's protection."

"Doesn't apply to me."

"Fine. Ask your dad and then, depending on what he says, kill him."

"Or not." Vadik added hastily. "Alive is good. Killed is not."


	36. Chapter 36

**To wikelia- Are you sure she looooves him? ^_^ And thank you! I tried :D Your poor future husband, bless him! (Go for it ;) ) Well, I hope your expectations are met, thank you!**

* * *

"Oh, this is going to hurt."

"It _was_ your idea." Astrid smirked. Hiccup was 'modelling' Hildegard's prototype. He had thought he had a few weeks to psych himself up, but he hadn't taken into account how quickly his mumma-in-law worked. It had been three days and she had him suited and booted in Gronckle Iron armoured clothing. And facing down two Deadly Nadders, a squadron of Terrible Terrors and a Night Fury. Hildegard watched from a safe distance, pencil and paper at the ready. Hiccup sighed. "Ready?" Astrid grinned, far too excited to see her husband blown to smithereens. Hiccup straightened his helmet.

"I suppose so."

"Fire!" Astrid ordered. The Terrors attacked first, blasting him. One latched onto his shiny greave and tried to take off with it. "Stormfly, Spike, spine shot! Toothless, plasma blast!" Most of the spines skittered off the armour, one cutting through Hiccup's sleeve. Hildegard started scribbling notes immediately, looking up only to see her son-in-law blasted across the arena. Toothless chortled as his rider rolled onto his back, groaning. "What do you think, Mum?" Astrid asked cheerily. Hildegard hummed thoughtfully. "I say we go again."

"I am very much hurt."

"You big baby, you're _fine_." Astrid bounced over and helped him up. Everything ached, bruises on bruises. She tied her handkerchief around the cut on his arm. "Well, your Gronckle Iron held up alright." She brushed dirt from his front. "But maybe we should try a bigger target."

"Oh thank Thor..."

"You're very easily knocked off your feet." Hiccup frowned at her. Hildegard popped up before they could start play-fighting.

"Are you alright?"

"Peachy." Hiccup felt his head, realising his helmet was gone. Toothless scurried over, carrying the headwear in his mouth. "Astrid said mean things, mumma-in-law."

"She always says mean things. Arms up." Hildegard instructed. Hiccup did so, wincing as his shoulder flared. Hildegard noticed. "Maybe if we left the armour style, made it into a shirt. How would that work on the joints though?" She mused to herself. Hiccup let her inspect the damage. "Or we could layer it. On the bottom layer, you have the main pieces of armour and on the top layer, armour to fill in the gaps. Although, you don't want to get too hurt wearing it all, so maybe a thin underlayer..." She started making notes again. Astrid helped Hiccup pry himself lose from the prototype. Toothless's plasma blast had melted it a little in places.

"You're mean too." Hiccup told his dragon. Toothless managed a gummy smile around the helmet, rising up on his hind legs to plonk the spit-covered thing on his human's head. "Ah, Snoggletog memories. Thank you _so_ much, bud."

"We should get you cleaned up." Astrid laughed. She patted Toothless as a well done and he rushed to join the two Nadders in chasing the Terrors. Hiccup flicked Night Fury saliva at her as she turned her head, startling her.

"I should run?" He asked, humour dying as she opened her eyes, lips pressed firmly together.

"You should run."

"Right. Bye, mumma-in-law!" And he was out of the arena, poof, gone. Astrid dragged her sleeves over her face and huffed irritably.

"Don't kill him too much, dear." Hildegard requested. "He's the only one I can get to test my designs."

"I'll just take his other leg then." Astrid kissed her mother's cheek. "Bye, Mum."

* * *

"Why is your mother trying to kill your dad this time?"

"Um, why wouldn't she?" Ingrid retorted. Alastor took the spyglass from Vadik and smiled, passing the long-looker to his sister. "Oh, wow. She's really gunning for him this time. Go Mum!"

"Let me see, let me see!" Aloe insisted. Alastor sat her on his shoulders, Ingrid handed the spyglass over. "Run, Daddy, run! She's gonna get you!" Two seconds later, Aloe hissed and grimaced. "Poor Daddy." She pouted. "Mummy's mean to Daddy."

"He more often than not deserves it." Ingrid smiled, waving it off. Aloe turned the spyglass elsewhere, gasping excitedly.

"Vad! Tuffnut is with your mummy!"

"Say what?" Vadik said slowly. "Wait!" His eyes widened and he jumped up. Aloe dropped the long-looker in his hand. "Oh no! Mum!" He scolded. The Haddocks laughed. "What's so funny?" Vadik demanded hotly.

"Easy, Vad." Alastor smiled. "We just figured you'd get like this." When Vadik still looked confused and annoyed, Alastor explained. "You've only just got your mum back and here she is dating Tuffnut of all people. You're _jealous_."

"I am not!"

"You so are!" Ingrid grinned wickedly. Vadik flushed crimson, wringing the spyglass in his hands. "Buddy, listen. It's perfectly normal, don't worry about it. Like Al said, you've literally only just met your mum, you'll want to get to know her without anyone interfering or taking her attention from you. But Dad said she crushed _big_ on Tuff _forever_ ago, so..." She shrugged carefreely. "I guess having you back gave her the confidence to agree to it all." Vadik's annoyance was simmering away, but he still looked uneasy. "Besides, why wouldn't you want Tuff as your stepdad? He's hilarious."

"You're only saying that because he put eels in Arne's underwear."

"Come on, bro, you found it funny too."

"That's besides the point." Alastor said quickly. "Tuff's crazy. Like, off the charts crazy. Him _and_ Ruff, but at least she's got Eret to somewhat keep her in check, like, twenty-three percent of the time. Ada _loves_ Tuff's pranks and jokes, she's just going to encourage him."

"No." Aloe said. "Mummy said Uncle Tuff hasn't be as calm or as nice since he started seeing Vadik's mummy."

"Did she now?" Ingrid asked, smiling.

"Oh, you've got that look." Vadik shuffled away slightly. "What are you planning?"

"Absolutely nothing." Ingrid smirked. "To do with you." She added. "Aren't we supposed to be getting you a dragon anyway?"

"Well, yeah, but Mum-"

"Let her and Tuff be, Vad." Alastor advised, hand on his friend's shoulder. "They're cool. Go and get a dragon. SPIKE!" He yelled, making Aloe jump. His Nadder arrived within the minute, a whole roasted chicken in his mouth. Alastor just sighed. "I want him back in one piece." He warned his sister.

"I know how to fly a dragon, Al. Have some faith."

"He doesn't." Alastor nodded at Vadik.

"I'm not flying the dragon, I promise. Not until I've trained up some, anyway. Uh... can you keep an eye on-"

"No, I am not spying on your mum." Alastor shook his head. "Aloe wants to go back to the cove and carry on swimming. Maybe we'll find you a dragon too, little Al." He jostled his little sister's feet. Aloe clapped excitedly.

"Yay! Let's get a dragon, big Al!"

"Mum and Dad are going to kill you."

"Well then, Aloe can have Spike too." The Nadder squawked unhappily. "I'm joking, bud, just joking." He petted his dragon's nose, said his goodbyes and stalked off down the hill, Aloe still sat on his shoulders and babbling a hundred miles an hour. Ingrid sighed, shaking her head. Spike crooned and scratched under his wing, waiting for them.

"Ladies first." Vadik offered.

"Do you know how to mount a dragon? Particularly a Nadder?"

"Uh..."

"Didn't think so. Spike, c'mhere. You need to get his trust first. It helps that he knows you, but still. You can't just jump on a dragon willy-nilly. If they don't trust you, they'll tip you off."

"Sounds delightful. Do I do the hand thing now?" She nodded. Vadik gradually and tentatively put his hand out. Spike eyed him sidelong, considering for a moment. Ingrid made to speak, to tell Vadik to move back, but Spike accepted him at the last second, pushing his nose against his palm. Vadik sighed in relief. "Now what?"

"Put your foot on his wing joint. Carefully. Nadders are very vain, as I'm sure you've noticed." Vadik inclined his head. With a little help from her, he was in the saddle. Spike shuffled his wings and peered back, looking as though he were smiling. Ingrid deftly climbed up in front of him, taking hold of the horns.

"Do you ever worry those will take an eye out or something?"

"No." She grinned over her shoulder. "I'm not an idiot."

"True, but still..."

"Stop worrying. Right, what did Al say? Spike, uh... fly! Up! No, that's not right..." Spike scraped his claws along the dirt impatiently, then started running. He jumped off the peak of the hill, letting the wind fill his wings. Vadik almost fell as the Nadder started climbing higher and higher, throwing his arms around Ingrid's waist. She glared at him.

"Sorry! But I'm not keen on plummeting to my death!"

"You're not going to plummet to your death!" She reprimanded. "Now stop crushing my internal organs and sit up! Hold my shoulders if you have to!" Vadik did, praying to every god he could think of that he would indeed not plummet. Ingrid shook her head, directing Spike towards the forest. "Any idea what kind of dragon you want?"

"Um... one that doesn't try to kill me?"

"They'll all do that until they know they can trust you!"

"Isn't that just wonderful?" Ingrid laughed.

"Ahh, poor ickle bubba Vad is scared!"

"For good reason! Dragons are as scary as they are cool!" Again, she shook her head, still laughing. Spike spotted a clump of Terrors ahead, squawking eagerly. He dived at them, chasing them, loop-the-looping and doing barrel rolls. Vadik felt ready to be sick, which humoured Ingrid even more. She eventually took pity on him, pulling slightly on the Nadder's crown and levelling him out, back on track to the forest.

Vadik could not have been happier to be back on solid ground. "OK, maybe a small dragon."

"That wasn't the best of first flights, admittedly. Usually we take first time riders on a gentle route, no flipping and turns, none of that. I'm just a mean trainer."

"You can say that again." Vadik grumbled. "Ugh, I think I lost my stomach back there somewhere."

"Then you won't want lunch. This way. Come on, Spike." She started off, her brother's dragon obediently following behind. Vadik waited until his head stopped spinning and stomach stopped churning before running after her. They came across a Gronckle first, rolling a particularly large rock down a small slope. Vadik shook his head. "What's wrong with a Gronckle?" Ingrid demanded, crossing her arms.

"Nothing, I just don't want a Gronckle."

"Moving on then."

They walked for another quarter of hour before they found anything else. Spike was delighted to see another Nadder, flirting a little with the female, showing off his colours and barbed tail. Ingrid pinched the bridge of her nose. Thankfully, the female Nadder had little interest in this potential suitor and carried on. Spike didn't seem all that bothered, chasing butterflies instead. He discovered a snoozing Monstrous Nightmare in the opening of a cave, stopping abruptly. Nightmares were the most violent if you woke them up. These were not morning-dragons. Ingrid motioned to Vadik, put a finger to her lips and carried on. Vadik followed, trying to step where she stepped as to not wake the sleeping beast.

"Whoa, what's that one?"

"Oh gods... that's a Typhoomarang."

"I want one."

"Fine." Ingrid muttered. She thought for a moment, giving the relevant dragon call when she remembered it. The Typhoomarang looked round, roaring in reply. When he landed and saw two small humans and a Nadder, he was less than happy, but was curious too. "There you go. One Typhoomarang. Go get him."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that." Ingrid confirmed. "Do the hand thing. And stay calm. Don't freak. They can smell fear."

"Yes, that's really helpful, thank you." Vadik started forward. The Typhoomarang's great head whipped round and his yellow eyes narrowed. Vadik jumped back. "You know, that Gronckle might have been easier."

"Just do it. Talk to him, give him a name."

"Like what?"

"I don't know, he's your dragon."

"Um... OK. Hello, uh, Mr. Typhoomarang. Please don't bite my head off, I'm just trying to train a dragon, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't bite me. Ooh, he moved!" Vadik shook his hands, spinning on the spot. Ingrid snickered. "You're not helping! Whoa, no! Don't eat me!" Vadik threw his arms over his head, eyes firmly shut. The Typhoomarang towered over him, taking huge breaths, smelling him.

Imagine his surprise when the mighty dragon nuzzled him and... purred? Vadik opened his eyes, marvelling at this giant creature. Slowly lowering his arms, he glanced at Ingrid. She beamed and nodded, waving him on. "Um... hello?" Another nudge. Vadik put his hand out and his new friend pressed his nose against it. "Oh wow. That actually worked. I think I need to lie down."

"Give him a name!" Ingrid hissed.

"Um... I'm going to call you... uh... Hurricane?" No, a grumpy growl. "Uh... Tornado? Storm? Oooh! I've got it! Jetstorm!" The Typhoomarang perked up at that. "Jetstorm it is then. Hey, Ingrid, I've got a dragon."

"I can see that. Where the hell are you going to keep him?"

"Oh. I didn't think of that. Do you think Mum will notice?" She held up her hand, thumb and forefinger _very_ nearly touching. Then she shrugged. "Well, I've got a dragon now. Named him and everything, I can't leave him out here."

"Maybe Dad will let you have one of the big pens in the arena. Pretty sure a Typhoomarang can fit in one of them. If not, we'll think of something else." She whistled to Spike, swinging up into the saddle. Vadik looked at Jetstorm. The dragon bowed his head. "He wants you to get on." Ingrid prompted. Vadik did, clutching the horns before him. Spike took off, calling to Jetstorm, encouraging him up too. "Your mum is going to love you."


	37. Chapter 37

**And now time for the time-skip! Yay! I've skipped about four years, so bear with. There is a plan :P**

* * *

"Ow!" Hiccup exclaimed, dancing away and shaking his burning hand. Astrid laughed, alerting him to her presence. "Oh, now you've ruined the surprise, I was trying to do something nice." He sulked. Astrid shook her head, moving closer to peer around him. "It's all burnt up now, but it was something nice." He muttered. Astrid saw a pile of charred yellow material and glowing wires, not sure what her husband had been attempting to make. She scrutinised him from the corner of her eye, huffing irritably.

"I told you to shave that off."

"No."

"We've been over this a billion times, a beard doesn't suit you."

"You're the only one that ever said that."

"That's because I have to live with you."

"The kids didn't think it uglified me."

"Probably because that's not a word." Astrid dragged a hand over her face tiresomely. "Just shave." He grinned wickedly. Astrid went back to inspecting the mess on his desk. "What is this anyway?"

"Oh. Well, I figured with, uh, a certain anniversary coming up, maybe we could do something special and… well, it was one of a hundred lanterns, but now I've got ninety-nine."

"If you've made ninety-nine others, how come you screwed up with this one?"

"Um…" He hummed. "Monotony?" Hiccup hunched his shoulders. "I don't know, I guess I wasn't paying close enough attention or something. I'll make another, it's fine. But I was thinking we could light them and send them off, you know, that night, as a tribute for, um, for your dad."

"Hiccup, it's been four years, you don't have to treat it like a sensitive topic."

"It kind of is though, him being your dad and all…"

"As much as I miss and would love to have him back, I'm OK." She narrowed her eyes. "I'd kiss you, but that makes me itch, so…" She shook her head. "Nope." Hiccup ran a hand over his jaw, biting his bottom lip contemplatively.

"Fine." He decided. "But only because I'm in a nice mood." Astrid stared at him. "And because you're my ever-loving, ever-amazing wife who I should know to listen to by now."

"And?" She prompted.

"I'm an idiot?"

"Why are you asking me? We all know it's true." Astrid smiled as he pouted childishly, squeezing his hand. "Thank you. I really do appreciate it. But, um… where are the ninety-nine lanterns you didn't destroy?"

"I… gave them to Gobber? I think… no, wait… I gave them to Bjorn to give to Gobber to give to your mum so she should have them by now. I think." He repeated. Astrid sighed. "I'm an idiot." She hummed, nodding slowly. "But you love me for it." He grinned. "Hey, don't pull that face, that's just rude. I'm vewy upset now."

"Vewy? What are you, _five_?"

"Technically, I'm eight, so," He stuck his tongue, "to you. Nine soon though, yay!"

"You're not nine _soon_ , that's _months_ away. We've got Snoggletog first and-" He shushed her, pressing a finger to her lips.

"I know you're trying to distract me so I won't question you about my big birthday party." Her brow furrowed. Hiccup decided to head home and shave. "And I'd like some balloons." He added just before he left. Astrid sighed. She would have thought she would be over the fact she was married to an idiot, but the older he got- biologically, at least- the more idiotic he became, something she was still trying to get her mind around. He may have a big head, but there was definitely not _that_ much room for idiocy.

* * *

It snowed quite heavily overnight, something Aloe was delighted about. She loved the snow, she got to build all her favourite snow-dragons and have snowball fights with the other village kids. For such a sweet child, she was very competitive. And also now officially older than her father. Her brother was thirteen now and her sister fifteen, so Hiccup was once again the youngest Haddock.

Aloe woke first that morning, charging straight out after a quick pit stop to dress warm and eat a couple of sausages. She had grown out of her non-meat diet about two years ago. She made as many snowballs as she could and hid supplies of them all around the plaza then did a lap of the village, rounding up her friends. Her best friend was the first up and out of them all, Hanson Usence. Aloe got him straight in the face with a fresh snowball, flattening him into a snowdrift. "Ha! I win!"

"Hey!" He protested, struggling to right himself. "That's just cheating, I wasn't ready!" But he was laughing. Hanson was a few weeks older than her with richly auburn hair and deep hazel eyes, a wicked grin beneath a freckle-splashed nose. He was taller too, but that wasn't at all surprising, most people were taller than the Haddocks. Aloe gave an impish grin and ran for cover, readying her prepared ammunition as she crouched behind a stack of barrels. She could hear Hanson crunching through the snow, waiting for her to spring up and launch her next attack. She jumped up just to startle him, ducking back down almost instantly. His snowy missile zoomed harmlessly way above her head, splattering against the house behind her.

"Na-nah, missed me!" She teased, sprinting from her cover and launching a retaliation. It wasn't long until the others joined in, an all-out war raging in the plaza. Anyone trying to pass through kept a tight hold of their helmets with one hand and a shield up in the other.

Alastor and Ingrid loved the snow for different reasons. Ingrid liked to train in the treacherous conditions, dragging Vadik along with her. Alastor liked sledging. He had made his own sledge and started the craze when it snowed earlier this year. Sometimes they could train in mudslides out in the forest, but sledging in the snow was _way_ more fun. Unfortunately, he was still working on steering and stopping. Very important when you forgot to account a younger sibling's eccentricity.

He made it to the top of the hill with the Jorgenson twins and some of the other kids their age. Everyone had sleds and were all eagerly awaiting the departure, waiting for Alastor to set the best course down. The Haddock boy could discern the fastest, most adrenaline-inducing crash course in any set-up; this scored him a few points with kids all over the village- even Arne, Snorre and Rolf begrudgingly accepted it was cool. They had backed off as the years went by, eventually leaving Alastor alone. Mostly. It didn't bother him so much now, he had made friends elsewhere and invented a really cool sport too.

"OK, ladies and gentlemen! And Orrick." Orrick frowned. Alastor grinned. "We want to head straight down the middle this time, go about a hundred feet and straight left if you can, there's a ledge which we'll hopefully jump over and not through, but hey. And there are two other paths as well, left and right, so we don't get crowded. If you're going left, by that boulder. Going right, by that oak tree. If you're going down the middle, follow me." Alastor turned and jumped, falling forward on his sledge. His was very light and streamlined, Gronckle Iron feet withstanding any bumps and crashes. No-one had been able to beat him in a race yet, but they were getting closer.

* * *

Hiccup was walking through the village, shield raised to deflect snowballs, with Bjorn Junior, Snotlout, Astrid and his father, trying to arrange the winter tournament of Thawfest. "I mean, look at them." He said, pointing up the hill at the distant sled-racers. "What about that?"

"Well, they'll need standard issue sleds then." Astrid said, hefting her shield as a stray snowball whizzed towards her head. She brushed stray ricocheting snow from her cheek. "Because I've heard Al's is top-notch and totally unfair to anyone else's."

"Good lad." Hiccup smiled proudly. "So, that, axe-throwing… do we have to have the sheep lug? They're tormented enough in the Races."

"Sheep-lugging has been around for generations!" Stoick insisted.

"So have you." Hiccup muttered.

"Was that another crack about my age?"

"Oh gods, dearest father, no!" Hiccup shone an innocent smile his dad's way. Stoick grumbled.

"Dad, look out!" Hiccup turned belatedly, a brownish-blondish blur slamming straight into his legs and knocking him flat on his back. Snotlout and Astrid cracked up, Stoick leaning over to smile at his son.

"Karma." He said.

"Ow." Hiccup replied. He sat up groggily, gaining a snowball in the back of the head. Silence reigned all of a sudden, someone whispering _'you hit the chief_!' Alastor was priority though, but he seemed alright. He had crashed into a snowbank against the side of a house, more snow toppling down on his head. Snotlout dug him out, grinning.

"Dad, are you OK?" Alastor asked as his uncle dusted him down. He was shivering, from cold and excitement. "I can't really stop. Or turn. Sorry, Dad." He wrung his hands. "If you're not going to tell me off, can you help me fix that later?"

"I need to fix _me_ first." Astrid helped him to his feet. "I think my legs are broken."

"You'll need legs for them _to_ be broken." Astrid retorted without missing a beat. She brushed snow from the back of his head, turning to the assembled children. "Who threw that?" She demanded.

"I did!" Aloe stepped up immediately. "But Hanson made me jump, threw off my aim."

"I think my kids have got it in for me." Hiccup groaned. His youngest two smiled angelically, apologizing again. Hiccup told them to be careful and waved them away. "If we're doing this sledging thing for Thawfest, make sure no-one is standing at the bottom. I fell so hard I think I've swallowed a lung." Astrid snorted.

"Come on, you big drama queen. Let's get you patched up. Again." She marched off with her husband. Snotlout snickered.

"I shall treasure that memory forever." He sighed wistfully. "Gotta tell Waiola." He saluted Stoick and ran off, shield at the ready. Stoick shook his head. His son and his friends were never going to grow up. Not really.

* * *

Ingrid rolled quickly from behind the bush to behind the tree, on her feet in a second. Vadik was hiding somewhere in the woods, her turn to be seeker. This was stealth training and she was trying out her grandmother's new batch of winter armoured clothing or armothing as Tuffnut had called it. It was thicker and warmer and also white, blending almost effortlessly with the snow around her. Vadik was dressed in something similar, armed with a sword. Ingrid had her axe and the array of her knives her grandfather had left to her so long ago. The anniversary of his passing was coming up, steeling Ingrid's resolution to be just as great a warrior as he ever was. She clicked her tongue and growled quietly. Snapper materialised for a brief second, scurrying from amongst the trees to white blanketed boulders, vanishing. The dragon could smell Vadik and would root him out, flushing him from his hiding place and straight into one of Ingrid's many traps.

Vadik could see neither Ingrid or her dragons. He couldn't see Snapper for obvious natural camoflauge reasons, but Sneezy was lurking around somewhere, sentry-like. Hiccup had made the scouting Terror armour from Gronckle Iron as well, painting it varying shades of white and very, very pale greys. He was outnumbered, Jetstorm too big to armour, camoflauge or hide. Sometimes Alastor helped him, but with this snowy weather, he was sure to be out sledging.

He crouched low, keeping his back close to the tree trunk, holding his sword low. He had covered it in mud and then snow and ice to try and conceal it in this wintery disaster. Ingrid didn't have any trouble with this, possessing small knives and an axe. Vadik had had no glimpse of that double-headed battleaxe; the longer the training went on, the more the silence dragged out, the more anxious he felt. Ingrid could pounce at any second, he'd lose.

Peering around the tree, he saw a shimmer on the rocks. He squinted at it questioningly, but whatever had caused the shimmer wasn't there. Was it Snapper, the sunlight on the snow, what?

A rustle behind him. Vadik turned quickly, gripping the handle of his weapon. The foliage opposite him trembled, twigs snapping. He caught a whiff of wild boar and headed off away from it as quickly and as quietly as he could. Ingrid would be drawn to the racket. He could use that to his advantage, he realised, doubling back. Sure enough, Ingrid dropped from branches of a tree covering the bush, startling the boar. It ran squealing from the crazy humans. Sneezy alighted on Ingrid's arm, snuffling his owner curiously.

"Find him, Sneezy." She breathed, holding a strip of fabric up. Vadik didn't recognise it at first, but as Sneezy sniffed it, he figured she was using the little dragon to track him by smell. The Terror squawked and sniffed the air. Vadik wiped mud on the concealed parts of his face, splattering snow into the sticky mess.

The Terror flapped to the floor, scuttling across the snow, yapping excitedly upon finding footprints. Ingrid signalled. Snapper appeared, tracking Sneezy. He smelled the fabric too, then dematerialised. Vadik mentally cursed. Ingrid had trained her dragons to be the best of the best in finding and trapping her prey together. Sneezy would find them, Snapper would catch up and then they would both hold their target prisoner.

 _Now or never_ , Vadik thought. Ingrid had her back to him, neither dragon was in sight. Vadik hoped that meant it was just her. He dove from the bushes, sword raised. Ingrid heard him thunder forward, axe swinging round to catch his blade in the curve. She yanked it back towards her, unbalancing him, landing a hefty kick to his midriff. Vadik fell back, scrambling away as she flipped her axe and snatched his sword from the air. He unsheathed a smaller sword from inside his jacket, motioning to her, _fight me_. She grinned devilishly, pouncing, axe in her left and sword in her right, a well-oiled machine. He ducked the axe, narrowly missed the sword, swiped at her only for her to spin away, kicking him from behind. He managed to regain his balance this time, stabbing low, dislodging his sword and winning it back. Ingrid readied her axe in both hands now, twirling it deftly. Vadik squared up to her feet apart. A stand-off ensued, staring the other down, equally obstinate.

"What are you waiting for, Ingrid?"

"You, you muttonhead."

"I thought you had no time for waiting." Vadik stomped forward, trying to throw her off. Ingrid danced back easily, clicking her tongue again. Sneezy flew out of nowhere, knocking Vadik's helmet clean off. He spun midair and spiralled round, swooping between Vadik's legs. Distracted, Vadik didn't see Snapper until he was right on top of him, pinning him under a claw. "That's no fair. Fight me yourself."

"I don't need to." Ingrid smiled, planting her axe in the ground and leaning on the handle.

"What are you going to do if your dragons were captured then? It's a possibility, there could be dragon hunters out there, they'll set a trap and catch these two easy. What then?"

"I'll scout the layout of their base and invade when they set up camp."

"What if they're leaving?"

"Nothing stands between me and my dragons." She said fiercely. She snapped her fingers, her Changewing moving back dutifully. Vadik pushed himself to his feet, kicking his sword up, striking it against the frozen ground to dislodge his attempts at camoflauging it. Ingrid ran at him, hauling her axe from the snow and swinging it up, yelling defiantly. Vadik ducked and parried, exchanging strike for swing, stab for lunge, metal clanging against metal, against leather and wood, the whack of flesh on flesh as she smacked him in the face and kicked his legs from under him. "Dead." She declared, curve of the axehead at his throat. Vadik shook his head slightly, hooking his leg around hers and rolling away, tipping her over. He hopped up, whipping a knife from his belt and pressing the edge to her neck.

"Dead."

"Nope." She spat in his face. Vadik instinctively recoiled, her arm working its way under his and striking his ribs, her knee coming up at the same time. Sometimes he hated being a guy. Ingrid was on her feet in a heartbeat, axe recovered. She threw it above her head and brought it down, the icy metal skimming his cheek narrowly. "I win."

"I thought we agreed to leave certain parts of the male anatomy alone." He groaned, rolling over to rest on his knees and elbow. She just laughed.

"Like a dragon hunter is going to leave that alone. They'll go for what they can hurt."

"Very much hurt." Ingrid smiled lopsidely, offering her hand. Vadik muttered some curses and took it. "Can we go and join the others now? I'll so beat you in a snowball fight."

"Oh please." Ingrid stalked off, whistling for her dragons. Sneezy landed on her head and Snapper edged forward, gradually showing himself. "Hey, you." Ingrid grinned, scratching the Changewing under the chin. Sneezy tapped his claws on her head. "Well done, both of you." Ingrid shook her head, raising her hand to coax her first dragon down. "Yes, you did very nicely, thank you."

"Jetstorm!" Vadik called. His Typhoomarang roared in response. They followed the noise to a large clearing. Jetstorm had clearly been snoozing, the snow around him melted away, the ground simmering and charred. "Jetty!" Vadik beamed, sprinting towards his dragon. "We'll get her next time." He murmured, arms around Jetstorm's snout. The dragon lifted his head off the ground and, therefore, his rider too. Vadik smiled. "Thawfest is coming up, you love that." Jetstorm snorted in agreement, tipping his head back. Vadik slid to the awaiting saddle and strapped in. "Race you back to Berk!" He challenged.

"Loser has to eat nothing but limpets for a week!"

"Ah man, I hate limpets."

* * *

 **This is a sort of re-introduction to the characters, you know, four years later, etc. Hopefully it's OK! :D**


	38. Chapter 38

**To Guest who replied on Chapter 22 about the Ninja Turtles A/N, um... of course they're not like real turtles, they're mutants and they're ninjas and, depending on what version of them you pick they range from about four to eight foot tall.**

* * *

The snow stuck around for Thawfest. Hiccup kept himself a good distance from the snowballers and sledgers, watching the race from Toothless _way_ up in the sky. Astrid joined him, teasing him. "I have bruises on my bruises from that collision!" He protested. "Even on this!" He gestured at his prosthetic, frowning. Astrid rolled her eyes. "Well, if you're going to be like that, I won't tell you what the grand finale is."

"You don't need to. Gobber already told me."

"What? No fair! I told him to keep it a surprise!"

"Yes, but you know what Gobber's like." Astrid shrugged. Hiccup rocked his head from side to side and then sighed. Astrid hopped over from Stormfly and hugged him from behind. "You're a big dork and I love you." Hiccup smiled to himself, resting a hand on hers. Toothless huffed. Astrid laughed softly and patted the dragon's hide. "And I love you too, Toothless. And you, Stormfly. I love everybody here."

"That's good to know." Hiccup said over his shoulder. "But you look a bit pale. Are you feeling OK?"

"I'm fine, just a stomach ache." He hummed dubiously. "Don't give me that look, I'm _fine_." Hiccup faced the front. Toothless turned his head and snorted, ears flapping as he shook his head no. "What's he moaning about now?"

"He doesn't think you're _fine_ either."

"If it shuts you up, I'll go and see Gothi after the race. I'm telling you though, it's just a stomach ache." She swung around to sit side-saddle, whistling to Stormfly and jumping back over. "Go and start the race!" She reminded him. Hiccup urged Toothless into a dive. The Night Fury roared excitedly, plummeting and having the time of his life. Hiccup pulled him up at the last second, spraying slush and snow over the lined up racers. He looked back to see them all protesting, a couple tried to throw snowballs, but they fell short.

"The course has been marked down the hill!" He called to them. "Bright orange flags, you can't miss them! The purple flags down there mark the finish line! Prizes for first, second and third, etc. etc." Hiccup pulled the green flag from inside his sleeve. "You go outside the line of the orange flags, you're out! There will be no throwing of any sort of missile, includng snowballs, rocks, knives, daggers, other assorted weapons, you are not to throw _anything_!"

"Yes, chief!" The contestants chorused.

"And no running each other of the track either!"

"Yes, chief!" Hiccup raised the flag and they all took their starting positions. Hiccup waited until he saw Alastor and waved before dropping the go signal. Toothless wiggled about. Hiccup thought he wanted to join in, scratching behind the ears.

"No, bud." Hiccup laughed. "Follow Al." He instructed, tucking the green flag away and drawing the red one from the other sleeve. Toothless followed the Haddock boy closely, cooing worriedly. Why the small humans wanted to jump on planks of wood and metal and rush down this rocky, snowy, icy steep slope, Toothless had no idea. He wanted nothing more than to go down and pluck his rider's hatchling to safety, but his tail prohibited him. It looked dangerous and scary from up here, why had Hiccup even _agreed_ with this? He whined and looked back at his human, pawing at his face and straining to go down. Hiccup put two and two together. "Hey. They'll be fine. We're not letting them careening down this without some sort of protection. Look." He let Toothless fly lower. "See? All armoured up, wrapped up against the cold. You can relax now, Mumma Toothless." The dragon growled. Hiccup just smiled.

Alastor had a new sled, one that Hiccup had made it easier to turn and stop for him. His ribs would be bruised slightly, but this was _so_ worth it! The new sledge was faster, more aerodynamic, he could dodge obstructions that would have otherwise maimed or killed him simply by adjusting his weight left or right. His father was a madman, but he was also a bloody genius. Alastor had only ever gone this fast on Spike, he couldn't see the other racers, could hardly hear anything over the roaring of wind and snow in his ears, just about see over the next ridge. Flashes of orange to either side kept him in line until he saw purple fluttering about in wind. He whipped his head round as one rushed past him and remembered that was it. He pulled his weight back, pushing the lever on the side. That had been Hiccup's idea too, the lever lowered a curved metal plate that slowed the sledge down, creating traction and enabling Alastor to easily control and stop it without crashing. The bumpy ride made him feel all jumpy and disorientated, but Alastor couldn't help but grin. He and another racer had crossed the line within seconds of each other, the others now falling in. Hiccup and Toothless landed to give their verdict, crowning the other racer the winner, "by about this much." He finished, holding his thumb and forefinger impossibly close. Alastor turned to congratulate the victor, stopping short when he saw who it was. "Well done, Alva." Hiccup grinned, waving the red flag to signal to the audience it was all over.

"Thank you, chief." She bowed her head, beaming triumphantly. Alastor mentally slapped himself and trudged over, slipping on the snow unceremoniously. She caught him by the elbow and righted him. "You OK there?"

"Um... yeah. Thanks. Good race." He offered his hand and they shook.

"Yeah. Better like next time though, hey, Haddock?" Astrid and Stormfly landed next to Hiccup and Toothless, Astrid dropping from the saddle.

"He's got such good sportmanship." Hiccup said proudly. "What do you think about those two in a few years?"

"Will you not?"

"What?"

"You've gone from throwing yourself into life-threatening situations to constant matchmaking and, quite frankly, I don't know which is worse."

"OK, but for the record, I didn't _throw_ myself anywhere, all that just happened." Astrid started to respond when he cut across. "You should be a Gothi's now, young lady. A deal's a deal."

"I'm _fine_."

"I'm coming with you."

"You've got to manage the races."

"Dad can handle it." Hiccup replied instantly. He rummaged in Toothless's saddle bag, withdrawing a blue flag. This was the emergency chief flag for Stoick. Once Hiccup waved this, his father was in command and he was free until required. "Off to Gothi's then. Come on. Race you." Astrid looked up irritably, Skullcrusher and his rider already on their way over to distribute the prizes. Hiccup smiled eagerly, taking her by the arm.

"Alright, alright. I'm going. Gods, you're annoying."

Hiccup let Astrid win for complying. Usually she was so stubborn about coming to see Gothi about whatever ills troubled her, but Hiccup was beginning to gradually wear her down. Gothi had been watching the races from up here, full of cold and covered in a blanket of Terrible Terrors. Hiccup had given the elder a series of spyglasses and dual-long-lookers over the years, but hadn't necessarily thought it through. The elder woman could watch anyone anywhere at anytime and if that wasn't creepy, he didn't know what was.

Gothi seemed to have been expecting them, whether she had seen them coming or not. Toothless snuffled at the medicinal supplies she had laid out, sneezing at one of them and accidentally boiling whatever was in the pot. Gothi raised her staff; the Night Fury scarpered, cowering behind his rider and crooning apologetically. "Sorry about that, Gothi." Astrid placated. "Toothless woke up in a very nosy mood today." Gothi scribbled something in the dirt. "Yes." She agreed. "And I would feel sorry for him if Hiccup wasn't his rider." Gothi jotted something else down. Hiccup drifted forward to decipher her writing. "I've just got a bit of stomach ache, but you know how he is." Astrid gestured to her husband. "He worries too much."

 _No need to worry_ , Gothi wrote, _it is good news_.

"My stomach ache is good news?" Astrid said, unconvinced. Gothi rolled her eyes. Hiccup had a hunch, confirmed at the next bit Gothi scribbled.

"Yay! Haddock baby number four!"

"Wait, what?" Astrid shook her head. "But-" Gothi used the curved end of her staff to send the chief away. "We agreed no more." Astrid explained quietly. "I've been taking all the right herbs and- why didn't it work?" Gothi just pointed up. "Right, right. Gods." Astrid glanced back at Hiccup, who was bouncing, he was ecstactic. "And, um... it won't be like... uh... that other one, will it?" Gothi shook her head. "Are you sure?" A nod. "If... if anything changes, will you let me know? I don't want to let him down again. I mean, look at that idiot, he's so happy." Astrid smiled fondly. Gothi patted her reassuringly on the arm. "Thank you, Gothi. No, Toothless! Don't bite him! Hiccup, will you _calm_ down?"

"No way! I'm gonna be a dad again!"

"And you stopped being a dad when the children you've already got became older than you?"

"That is a completely irrelevant point and yes, something like that." Gothi tapped Astrid's shoulder and penned something else. _Good luck_.


	39. Chapter 39

**To Guest- You're not the only one :P**

 **To Ingrick- He may be going easy on her... I'm not telling ^_^**

 **And because it's Hiccup's birthday today, I'm going to take a short break with the Thawfest and do a little something. Right now, in this, it's nowhere near Hiccup's birthday, which is why I've done a one-shot** _ **Happy Birthday, Hiccup**_ **! so yay! READ IT! Pleeeeeeease!**

* * *

"Dad?" Aloe asked, peering up at her father curiously. Hiccup leant forward and looked down, smiling.

"Yes?"

"Mum was talking to Uncle Fishlegs earlier about your birthday. But she said you had a stupid birthday. Why?"

"I only have a birthday once every four years."

"Why?"

"I was born on a Leap Year." Aloe blinked at him blankly. Hiccup explained, crouching before her. "So, me being the awkward baby that I was, I had to be born premature _and_ on a Leap Year. Because of that, I'm not even nine years old yet."

"What?" Aloe shook her head. "No! That makes me older than you! That's not right!" Hiccup smiled.

"Well, it's true."

"It's _weird_."

"Aloe, this is Dad we're talking about." Alastor joined them, resting a hand on his sister's shoulder. "He is the personification of _weird_." Aloe eyed her father dubiously. Hiccup watched her in bemusement. "How much do you remember of Dad's birthday? Like, before this."

"Not much." Aloe mumbled.

"That's because we don't really do much for his birthday on normal years. But come the twenty-ninth, we have to go all out or he gets upset." Hiccup nodded in agreement. Aloe fixed a quizzical look on her brother. "He doesn't get to birthday as often as everyone else, we have to make it special."

" _Very_ special." Hiccup added. He gripped Alastor's arm and pulled himself up. "What else was your mum saying to Fishlegs?"

"Oh no you don't!" Astrid burst in. "You're not spoiling your birthday!"

"So you are planning something! Can I have a hint?"

"No."

" _Please_?" Hiccup clasped his hands together and smiled as innocently as he could. Astrid locked a withering look on him and he pouted childishly. "Fine. But my expectations are very high now, you must know. I want cake." His wife cast her eyes skywards. "Lots of cake." Hiccup nodded. "Do you two want to come to the baker's with me? I fancy some cake for some bizarre reason." Alastor and Aloe nodded eagerly, grinning. "How about you, milady? Care to join us?" Astrid had her arms folded, scrutinising her husband for any of his tricks and charms. He offered his arm, lopsided grin in place. Astrid found herself taking it. "Now where's the other one?"

"Training with Vadik."

"Again? She don't half take after you." Hiccup told his wife. "We'll bring them some cake back then. Oh!" He turned back to his children. "First one to the baker's gets to pick afters for tonight." Alastor and Aloe exchanged quick, challenging glances before racing off. Hiccup chuckled triumphantly, putting his arm around Astrid. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired." She admitted. "I'd almost forgotten what it felt like."

"How far along are you?"

"Gothi says not long, three months at most." Hiccup did a quick sum in his head, taking into account how his other three had been at least a month premature each. "No," Astrid said, almost reading his thoughts, "they shouldn't be born around your birthday." Hiccup stuck his bottom lip out. "I'm very sorry," she cooed, "but at least we'll have another-"

"Another little Haddock!" He finished for her, beaming excitedly. "But, um... when are we going to tell the ones we've currently got?"

"I'm not sure." Astrid admitted. "Give me a few more weeks, just to make sure things are definitely alright." Hiccup stopped, peering into her eyes worriedly. "I'm fine, Hiccup. I just... don't want a repeat of things, that's all."

"Hey." He said softly, fingers silky soft as he brushed her hair back, cupping his hand against her head. "You said Gothi told you everything will be alright, didn't you?" Astrid nodded slightly, sniffling. Hiccup tilted his head a fraction, smile radiating comfort her way. "Don't fret, milady. He or she will get here safe and sound, I promise you. Oh, but that reminds me. I was thinking, you know, if we had a boy, we could... maybe call him Fenrir?" She did a double-take, those sky blue gems shimmering at him, astounded.

"R-really?" She managed, hope trickling into her voice.

"Of course." Hiccup smiled. "It'd be an honour." Astrid beamed at him, mixed emotional tears flooding down her cheeks. "And if we have a girl, we could call her Fenrira. Fen-ri... ra?" He puzzled. Astrid choked on a laugh, throwing her arms around him. Hiccup rested his head against hers, arms looping about her, lifting her from the ground ever so slightly. "I'll work on the girl variation." He vowed.

"You're such a pillock."

"You love me for it."

"Well, it's not your _only_ redeeming quality."

"Ooh, my good looks, sense of humour, admirable charm-"

"You're an easy target."

"Hey!"


	40. Chapter 40

As Snotlout's twin boys were younger than Ingrid- Thawfest competitors had to be above eleven years old and younger than seventeen- there had been two years in which the Haddocks had won the tournament. Snotlout's boys would be pressured like crazy to get the Jorgenson title back and to not be defeated by a girl, especially 'that Haddock girl'.

"Good job she's got your communication skills and competitive streak." Hiccup smiled as this year's competitors lined up. Astrid pretended to not know what he was talking about: "Ingrid is a lovely child," She insisted, "what mushrooms have you eaten this time?"

"It doesn't matter what she is." Snotlout cut in. "She's going to lose." Hiccup mentally sighed as his wife and their pigheaded fellow dragon rider squared up to each other. "No way, my boys aren't going to lose to a girl."

"Get ready to eat your words, Snotface; Ingrid will not let those muttonheads get anywhere near winning."

"Oh, would you look at that!" Hiccup bounced up from his seat, cutting across the quarrelling pair. "Presentation of the dragons!"

There were seven competitors today. There would be three sets of tournaments over the next two weeks; groups of seven, ten and twelve.

Snotlout's twin boys, Orrick and Shamus, shared a Zippleback. Most twins on the island did, it was simpler than bickering over dragons. Ingrid had a Changewing, one she had befriended as a hatchling and trained. She was on better terms with the Changewings than the majority of Vikings. There was also a Deadly Nadder, a Monstrous Nightmare, a Hackatoo and a Gronckle. Hiccup was so far impressed with them all- they were all clean and obviously healthy, happy with their riders and painted with racing stripes of various colours. Except for Ingrid's Changewing. Originally she had used blue, yellow and green- Astrid's idea- rather than red- Hiccup's idea- but the painted stripes didn't really help when her dragon was camouflaging.

"Riders!" Hiccup called, stepping forward. The crowd hurriedly quietened as they noticed their chief preparing to begin the race. "The first race," He told them, "is Capture the Flag! Around the island, you each have a flag!" He gestured to Fishlegs, who was ready and waiting in the arena, and he handed out strips of cloth of different colours. He made sure Ingrid got red. Astrid must have noticed this as well, but Hiccup pretended to oblivious. "First to return will win the race! Dragons!" He prompted. "This will be a clean game! Flag or no, if you cheat, you will be disqualified! Yes, that includes you, Ingrid, chief's daughter or not!"

When all the competitors were seated, Fishlegs retrieved another flag, larger than the ones now tied around the kids' wrists. He raised it above his head, eyes on Hiccup. The crowd leaned forward in their seats as the Zippleback heads started snapping at each other. "Astrid? Do you want to referee or shall I?"

"I'll go. You men are so unobservant." Snotlout spluttered in protest. Astrid ignored him, summoning her dragon and taking flight. Hiccup waved at Fishlegs and the flag dropped.

Dragons filled the air. Ingrid's Changewing vanished and, thanks to her winter camouflage, she did too.

Astrid followed the racers carefully, scrutinizing their every move. She saw a brief shadow of the invisible dragon every now and then, but her daughter was highly competitive. The twins were desperately trying to knock others off, insisting that their dragon was sneezing. Astrid cautioned them once, twice and then sent them back, snatching the bands from around their arms.

"You can't do that!" Orrick argued.

"Yes, I can. Now go back or I'll cut you from the tournament!" They shared annoyed looks and she had a hunch they were going to complain to their father and, in turn, Snotlout would complain to Hiccup, claiming she was victimizing his boys.

The other dragons splintered off, following the splatters of paint on rocks and trees that matched their flag colours. Astrid smiled to herself. Hiccup had rigged it slightly- all the flags were in one place, but the riders had to get them without the dragons. There were many tripwires to avoid- buckets of mud, feathers, sleeping Terrible Terrors, all the good stuff. He wasn't going to make it too easy for them.

Snotlout was enraged when his boys came back empty-handed. They started raving about how Astrid wasn't playing fair and that they hadn't done anything. Hiccup sent Valka out to check on the proceedings- Valka wasn't one to lie; everyone trusted her, even Snotlout. "I thought we were past this, Lout. You two do get very competitive for Thawfest though, I'll give you that."

"Chief, we need to be racing! We could lose otherwise!" Orrick protested.

"Yeah!" Shamus agreed. "We were only doing as we were told!"

"Which was what?" Hiccup asked curiously.

"Win." Snotlout said hurriedly, clamping his hands over his boys' mouths. "Just to win, get the Jorgenson title back, that's all." Orrick squirmed free.

"You said to win by any means necessary!" Shamus bit his father's hand.

"You made us cheat!" The twins gasped. "Ooh!" They said together. "We're telling Mum!" Snotlout tried to grab them, but they simply vaulted over the bannister, free-falling until their Zippleback caught them. Hiccup started laughing.

"Oh dear oh dear!"

"I didn't say that! Well, not exactly. You know how they interpret things. I said to win, to try their best, do what they can to win, I didn't... oh gods, Waiola's going to kill me."

"Maybe you should try and get back first then."

"Excellent! Hiccup, you're a life-saver!" Snotlout called for Hookfang, not as trusting as his twins were with their dragon. Hookfang, even now, still liked to see Snotlout fall flat on his face. Thankfully, he didn't this time. An injured Snotlout and a dead Snotlout had varying levels of entertainment.

"Come on, bud, I want to see how the racers are doing. Al, keep an eye on things for me, will you?" Alastor nodded. "No sitting in my chair though. I'll know if you've sat in my chair." Hiccup leapt over the side, landing in the saddle. Toothless chortled a greeting and took to the skies. They caught up with the race in no time. Ingrid and Snapper were nowhere to be seen. Astrid was breaking up a fight between the Nightmare and the Hackatoo, giving the Nadder and the Gronckle time to speed through. "Let's go and help the ladies, eh?" Hiccup directed Toothless into a dive, crashing right through the argument. Stormfly squawked in surprise. "Hello, milady!" Hiccup called up as they fell. Toothless levelled out at the last second, sea water spraying up into their faces. Hiccup spotted a red splash of paint on a cliff and followed that path. He didn't see Ingrid immediately, keeping an eye out for shadows and blurs. He saw other riders at various distances. Astrid caught up, made a rude hand gesture and disappeared again.

* * *

Hiccup reached the place with all the flags, a cavern full of his best ideas yet. Snapper clung to the wall beside him, camouflaging upon seeing the company. Ingrid's flag was tied around the tail of a sleeping Terror. She had worked her way around, over and through every other obstacle. Hiccup saw she had been ensnared in one of the rope traps, but she always had her knife on her. "Psst!" He hissed, making her jump. She stared at him, confused. Hiccup waved and gave her a double-thumbs up. A Gronckle's roar echoed through the cavern, followed quickly by a Nadder's trill. Ingrid mentally slapped herself and started unravelling her flag. The Terror stirred restlessly. "Don't forget to go out that way." Hiccup pointed. There were signs all over the cavern with large, highly noticeable arrows telling them to go out of the narrow exit in the top of the cavern. Above was a tunnel that led to the outside. Hiccup had booby-trapped that too with a little help from the Thornston twins. Ingrid nodded, securing her flag and pocketing it. Hiccup took off, leaving the way he had come in, silently elated he didn't have to face whatever horrors the older twins had concocted.

When Ingrid emerged several minutes later, she was covered in mud, feathers, dirt and what Hiccup hoped was mashed potato. Neither she nor Snapper were hidden now. Riders that were just trickling into the cavern fired and shot spines at her, trying to slow her in anyway now that she was visible. She avoided most of them, Snapper flying higher as explosions rocked against his underside. He tried camouflaging to no avail. Ingrid tugged on the saddle and he rolled, falling into a dive. Hiccup urged Toothless to copy, free-falling alongside his daughter.

"Hey!" He called, waving. "So, just plummet or…?" Ingrid's eyes hardened behind the mask. The sea was getting awfully close. Toothless buzzed with excitement, Snapper whining worriedly. Ingrid pulled up seconds before her father did, the Night Fury snapping out his wings at the last moment.

* * *

Hiccup proudly awarded Ingrid the Thawfest winner's medal for the third year in a row. Snotlout was _furious_ \- his boys had one shot at winning this year and had lost to 'that Haddock girl'. They were not allowed to compete again tomorrow, as they had asked, against Alastor. There was nothing like a good competition to unbury old rivalries.

"Now, if you sorted the groups _properly_ ," Snotlout smirked coldly, "your little runt wouldn't have stood a chance."

"He'd have stood a bigger chance than your boys." Hiccup replied calmly. "Al doesn't _cheat_ and get _disqualified_." Snotlout flushed a deep red in anger and opened his mouth to argue. Hiccup regarded him coolly for a moment and then turned away. He wasn't dealing with this now, he had a splitting headache. Snotlout was only in a bad mood because he was losing. "Oh, hello Al. You OK?" Alastor was anxiously wringing his hands and glancing at Snotlout. He didn't really talk in front of the Jorgensons- Snotlout and Waiola were alright, but their twins teased him and called him 'runt' and 'pathetic little fishbone'.

Hiccup took Alastor to the forges on the pretense of showing him a new line of shields. "What's up?"

"I c-can't compete tomorrow."

"Of course you can!" Hiccup beamed, shooing Sharpshot and Rage from their nesting spots on his workbench. Alastor shook his head. "Well, why not?"

"I can't... I ca-can't d-do it."

"Rubbish." Hiccup waved it off. He frowned at a blueprint for a minute and then remembered he had been designing a new tail for Toothless. "You'll be fine." He assured as Alastor paled and started gnawing on his bottom lip. "I've seen you training with Spike, you're brilliant!"

"No-one was wat-watching then."

"I was." Hiccup replied simply, making corrections on his latest tail plans.

"Didn't kn-know."

"I'll ask the crowd to turn away then."

"S-s-se-ser-ri-seri-ou-ous." Alastor pleaded. He burned crimson and disappeared into the back room. Hiccup looked round and saw Snotlout's twin boys at the serving hatch.

"Can I help you?" He asked politely, rolling up the blueprints. He ignored their gleeful looks and the mean glint in their eyes.

"We were wondering if you'd let us fly tomorrow."

"No."

"Why not?"

"You've had your chance. If you want to win, you'll have to try again next year." Their smiles faded into glares.

"We were thinking though, chief sir-" _Dangerous_ , Hiccup thought- "that Alastor ain't up for racing."

"Of course he is."

"Are you s-s-s-sure?"

"Right, you two are single-handedly cleaning the dragon stalls for a month." That wiped the grins off their faces. "Don't insult my son _ever_ again or I'll ban you from _all_ tournaments." Hiccup eyed them crossly. "Understood?"

"Yessir." They muttered.

"Go away." They did. "Al?" Alastor didn't appear. Hiccup went to find him. HIs son was pacing the back room nervously, his hands trembling viciously and blood staining his lower lip. He looked desperately at his father, silently pleading to have his earlier request granted. "No." Hiccup said flatly. Alastor's shoulders sank in defeat and he collapsed on the stool, his head in his hands. Hiccup crouched before him. "You _can_ do it." He smiled, pulling his son's hands away gently, but firmly. "I know you can."

"Y-yo-you d-don't know e-ever-everyth-thing."

"No, but I do know this." Alastor shook his head again and tried to free his hands. His father's stubborn streak won out. "I know you can win tomorrow, Al. And imagine their faces," He nodded back at the shop, "if you do!"

"I-I-I w-w-w-wo-won-won't."

"Not with that negative attitude you won't. Up!" Hiccup ordered so suddenly he made Alastor jump. "Intense training session _right now_!" He hauled his son to his feet, bursting at the seams with a sudden, unexplainable energy. "Where's Spike? Call Spike! Don't give me that look, do as you're told."

* * *

 **I'm splitting the pre-written Thawfest chapter I had, so here's part of it, the rest tomorrow or later, depends if I'm feeling nice or not :P**


	41. Chapter 41

Hiccup 'trained' Alastor until the sun went down. Not that his boy needed training; he needed encouragement. Alastor and Spike were quite the team, flying beautifully together and completing every task Hiccup set flawlessly in record times. Target practise, speed, aerial skills, all sorts.

"Alright then!" He called. Toothless rambled over, snaking under Hiccup's arm to be petted. Spike landed and Alastor dropped to the ground. His eyes were shining, his hair all tangled and his cheeks flushed with excitment and the chilly night air. He was shivering and didn't protest when his father draped his heavy bear skin chief cloak about him. "We should get back before your mum sends out a search party. Well done though." He grinned. "You fly like that tomorrow and you could win with your eyes closed." Alastor's enthusiasm faltered ever so slightly and he seemed ready to vomit again. Spike nudged him and he smiled shyly. Hiccup beamed proudly and let Alastor lead the way home.

* * *

The next morning, Alastor was lined up with the rest of his group. There was another Deadly Nadder in the line up, a yellow and purple female who had apparently taken a liking to Spike. Spike didn't notice, keeping still while Alastor painted the racing stripes on with shaking hands. He too had gone for yellow and blue as red and green were out of the question.

"Sheep race!" Hiccup declared through the loudspeaker. "Dad! Get over here and keep my seat warm; I'm supervising!" Stoick sent a rude hand gesture, but made his way over anyway, grinning and clapping his son on the shoulder. "Growing old disgracefully, are we, Dad?"

"Leave." Stoick said, pretending to be annoyed. Valka and Cloudjumper were ready to go too- after yesterday's fiasco, Hiccup had decided on three supervisors. Fishlegs and Meatlug were already out along the course. Toothless bumbled to Hiccup's side, excited at the prospect of a race. Hiccup had a second to sit in the saddle and then his dragon was off, diving over the fence and landing before the racers.

"Right." Hiccup said, securing the strap and flexing his fingers. Toothless cooed in greeting upon seeing Spike and Alastor, but stayed put. "You know the rules- usual course, marked with the orange flags. Sheep with targets on _only_ , no tearing sheep in half please and thank you, no maiming and no killing, accidental or otherwise." He looked at his mother, sure he was forgetting something. Valka shook her head and swung up onto Cloudjumper. She gestured at Alastor, whose nerves had flared up again. "Al, remember what we talked about." Hiccup smiled. Alastor nodded, a new look of determination crossing his pale features.

Toothless whined impatiently and smacked his rider's arm with his ear. "Alright, alright." Hiccup set Toothless's tail for take off, lifting his arm to signal to Bjorn Junior. Cloudjumper and Toothless took to the air as Bjorn raused the flag. Toothless was buzzing with excitement.

Hiccup waited.

Waited.

 _Waited some more..._

He dropped his arm. The flag waved wildly and dragons swarmed into the sky. Toothless beat his wings and caught up in no time, roaring happily. Cloudjumper and Valka weren't too far away, far more dignified.

Alastor had a good head start. Like his mother, he fed his Nadder chicken instead of fish. Hiccup had tried to feed Toothless chicken, but- for a dragon that didn't stop eating- he wanted none of it. Which was strange as he usually tried to steal some of Stormfly's dinner.

The other Nadder and her rider, Alva, were gaining quickly though.

"Oooh, Alastooor!" Alva sang distractedly, pulling a small package from her saddle bag. "Catch!"

Paint bombs.

Hiccup hadn't seen those in a while and was intrigued. Paint bombs weren't against the rules unless they were being thrown too viciously at someone's face. He knew from experience what it was to get paint in his eyes.

Alastor dodged the first one; the second splattered against Spike's leg, who panicked and flew faster. This had not been Alva's plan, clearly, as she cursed bitterly. "Come on," She urged her dragon, "come on, Trip." She threw more paint bombs. Spike artfully deflected some with spikes, Alastor managed to catch one and throw it back, hitting Trip in the blind spot. The second Nadder stopped- something was not in sight and she refused to move until it was dealt with.

Alastor was the first to get a sheep. Spike had learnt to keep it firmly in his claws without hurting the animal. No-one had been able to get a sheep from this pair. They tried, many tried. No-one succeeded.

"Go on, Al, show 'em who's boss!" Hiccup cheered.

"Stop picking favourites and supervise!" His mother called.

"I am not picking favourites, he's my son! And I am supervising!" And, just to prove a point, he broke up a fight between two dragons by diving straight through the squabble. He wasn't surprised to see Alva. She had been nicknamed the new Astrid Hofferson, which meant Astrid was flattered and a little ticked off about it- there could only be one!

Toothless scolded the fighting dragons and they were soon on their way. By the time Hiccup caught up with Alastor, he had netted his sheep and was stealing a second from a Gronckle. He was very crafy and had obviously learnt from the best- Hiccup, of course. Alastor had a feather and was tickling the underside of the Gronckle. The grip on the sheep slackened as the boulder class dragon spewed lava into the sea below. It was only when Alastor and Spike swooped off with the prize did Hagan realise he and his Gronckle had been mugged.

"Get back here!" He bellowed. Alastor waved happily and patted Spike's shoulder. Spike tucked in his wings and dived, spiralling to avoid Hagan's dragon's lava blasts.

Alastor pulled out of the drop at the last second. Hagan and his Gronckle had no such luck, collapsing into the icy waters. Hiccup and Toothless rushed to their aid, picking the boy up. "H-he c-c-ch-ch-che-cheated." Hagan shivered, teeth chattering.

"No, he didn't. And I'm not just saying that because he's my son- there aren't any rules against knocking riders off their dragons." He wrapped Hagan in his cloak while Toothless flapped his wings earnestly to pull the Gronckle free.

Hiccup took Hagan back to be warmed up and then rejoined the race. His mother was nowhere to be seen, but he passed Fishlegs.

"Al's doing really well!" Fishlegs beamed. "He's got four already and I think he was getting his fifth from Alva."

"Ooh, I can't miss this. C'mon, bud." Toothless put on a burst of speed and, a minute later, they found Alastor and Spike, covered in purple and yellow paint, but grinning victoriosly. A miserable, paint splattered sheep was clutched in Spike's claws.

"Where's Alva?"

"She crashed, but she's OK though, she's back there somewhere."

"You little devil you." Hiccup smiled proudly. "Go on, go win this thing." Alastor nodded and they were off.

Ten minutes later, Alastor was still in the lead. He had seven sheep, Alva had three and there were two other riders who had one each. The two Nadders were locked in combat, paint, spines and fire flying in all directions. An eighth sheep was bouncing between them. Everytime Spike tried to get hold of it, Trip whacked him with her tail. Everytime that happened, Spike reared back and the sheep fell into Alva's arms.

Alastor had an uncharacteristic sense of determination on his face and he sprung from his Nadder, grabbed the sheep and free fell. Alva screamed angrily, but Spike got to him first, deftly catching him on his back and shooting off.

He dropped the eighth sheep in the basket just as Alva caught up with him. She made a wild, desperate snatch; he had already won.

Then the horn went.

"The black sheep!" Alva acknowledged. If Alva got it, she won. She was _not_ going to lose to a boy!

The final sheep shot in the air, a raven dot against the warm blue sky. Two Nadders hurtled towards it. The other riders were streaking through the air, anxious to win.

The crowds were cheering. The black sheep didn't go far as all the riders were converging in a group. The three supervisors tried to break things up. Alastor alone heard them, dropping out of the rabble. The sheep was knocked into the air and fell down through a brief gap in the quarrelling.

Straight into Alastor's arms.

He looked stunned for a moment. The sheep bleated at him. It was only when Alva cursed profusely and four other dragons diving at him did he come to his senses. Spike dropped like a stone, Alastor gripping the saddle with one hand, the winning sheep under his arm. Even Valka couldn't help but pick a favourite now and cheer her grandson on.

The Nadder spread his wings and propelled himself forward. Alastor's final score was eighteen.

He had won the race!

He had won a race for the first time _ever_!

That would show Arne and his muttonhead friends. And the Jorgenson twins.

"A-LAS-TOR! A-LAS-TOR! A-LAS-TOR!" Hiccup led the chanting from Toothless, who was roaring in congratulations. The crowd picked up the chief's cheer, Astrid and Stormfly flew out to meet them and the other riders let go of the fact that they had lost to clap Alastor on as he was always nice to them and deserved some sort of victory...

Everyone except Alva. She was a bit of a sore loser, victory so close only to be snatched away. It took her an hour to calm down enough to congratulate Alastor as well, "but I totally could have won that had someone not knocked me sideways."

"Of course you c-could have." Alastor smiled politely. She seemed happy with that and left.

"TOLD YOU!" Ingrid shouted, punching her brother in the stomach and winding him. "I told you! And you didn't listen to me! Haddocks for the win, yeah!" She punched the air and started doing her own little victory dance.

"I want to race!" Aloe pleaded, dancing too.

"You're not old enough." Hiccup reminded her gently. "But you will be soon."

"How soon?"

"Couple more years."

"Oooohhh!" She complained. She still smiled at her brother though as he regained his breath. "Well done, Al! You can win the whole tournament!" And she hugged him. Hiccup smirked at Astrid- two daughters at completely different ends of the spectrum. Astrid made out she didn't understand him, looking pleased with herself all the same.


	42. Chapter 42

Hiccup, Snotlout and Fishlegs went about lighting ninety-nine lanterns, passing them out. The Haddocks, Hoffersons and any old friends or admirers of Fenrir Hofferson had gathered at the top of the cliff overlooking the ocean. Hiccup managed to burn himself fifteen times, but didn't seem to mind much. Raising his lantern up, seeing a breeze rattling the fabric, he said, "To Fenrir Hofferson, in the hope Valhalla is treating you well." The lantern slipped willingly from his fingers, floating on a bed of air. One by one, its ninety-eight bretheren joined the night sky, glowing heavenly amongst the pinpricks of stars, the pale slither of the moon seemingly winking at them. Astrid linked arms with her husband, laying her head on his shoulder. Hiccup understood, arm around her shoulders. Aloe wriggled between them, waving at the lanterns, her siblings joining the huddle either side. Astrid surveyed the burns on Hiccup's left hand, sighing with a smile. "You don't even have to say it." Hiccup squeezed her briefly. "I'm an idiot. Whoa, Spike!" Hiccup pointed frantically. Alastor rushed to rein in his dragon; Spike thought the pretty lights up above were part of a game, cawing miserably as his rider restrained him. Alastor distracted him with a series of shiny dots on the ground, sending the Nadder on his way. The reflections from his crazy array of looking glass shards snuck away into a bush, Spike scrabbling through the foliage to find them.

"Will Grampa Fenrir see them?" Aloe implored, big eyes locked on her parents, head tipped back.

"He'd better." Hiccup replied, waving his injured hand. Aloe giggled. He spotted Hildegard to one side, her tear-soaked face glistening with all the dots of light above. Hiccup planted a quick kiss on his wife's cheek and ventured over alone. "Is it OK, mumma-in-law?" Hildegard dragged a sleeve over her face.

"It's perfect. Thank you, Hiccup." She smiled. Hiccup bowed his head, hand on her shoulder. "But you do realise he'd call you a sentimental twit, right?"

"I'm sure he'd call me something much stronger if children weren't present." Hildegard laughed softly.

"Speaking of children, I see another's on the way. Don't look so surprised, I knew before you both went to see Gothi. You should be used to this by now." She prompted. Hiccup shrugged admittedly. "Why aren't you telling them?"

"Astrid wants to get to a safer point first."

"Ah." Hildegard nodded slowly, gaze returning to the gentle display of the night sky. "Keep an eye on her for me."

"Of course. Why don't you come and join us? We've got Haddock stew. And I don't mean the fish or... me. Haddock special. It's like Haddock charm, but _food_."

"If it's all the same to you, I'd like to sit here a while."

"Our door's always open." She smiled her thanks and Hiccup let her be. Aloe was hopping about on his return, mimicking him and his constant burning. She didn't notice him at first, tripping over her own feet when she did.

"Hi, Dad."

"Aloe Aloe."

"I wasn't doing anything." She smiled angelically. Hiccup hummed disbelievingly. "Is Nana H OK?" Aloe asked as her brother helped her up. They all looked over at the widow, Astrid taking Hiccup's hand. Hildegard saw them looking and waved timidly. Aloe sprinted over, throwing her arm's around her grandmother's midriff. Ingrid and Alastor quickly joined them.

"She knows." Hiccup told Astrid.

"Of course she does." Astrid sighed.

"She knew before we went to see Gothi."

"As always."

"She didn't seem worried."

"I am."

"You and me both, milady, just... stay positive. We've got this. Happy thoughts." He cheekily poked her in the head. Astrid glowered. "Here's a clue-" He gestured at himself, hands flowing down and then spreading his arms. Astrid contemplated him sidelong, a small smirk twisting her lips. Hiccup should have seen the punch to the gut from a mile off. Doubled over and winded, he could faintly hear her laughing.

"Thanks, Hiccup." Her hand brushed his hair.

"You're welcome." He wheezed. "Ugh, I think you've pushed my stomach back."

* * *

Later that night, Hiccup- bruised, but breathing- had to wrestle a sleeping Aloe into her bed. She clung to him like a Terror to food. Astrid just watched from the doorway, highly amused. Ingrid and Alastor were already settled down for the night, their respective Terrors snoozing on their chests. Bob wiggled between his human and her father, dislodging the girl. She stirred briefly, smiled dazedly. Hiccup tucked her in, Bob curling up in her arms. Astrid blew out the candles and disappeared downstairs. Hiccup followed quietly. They ate the last of the stew in silence, retiring not long afterwards. Toothless and Stormfly had fallen asleep in the middle of Tug-O-War, it seemed, snoring softly, a branch propped against them.

"What's with the face?" Hiccup asked, plonking himself down on his side of the bed.

"What face?" She parried, picking one of his old tunics for her nightwear. As she changed, Hiccup caught sight of the beginnings of a bump, feeling like his heart would explode. WHen Aloe was three, he had accepted she didn't want another, but he hadn't lost hope. It had been years since he felt this excited, he couldn't wait to meet Haddock baby number four.

"That face. You did like the lanterns, didn't you? Honestly." He added.

"Hiccup, I loved them, but..." She pulled the tunic over her head, sighing. "Dad's not going to meet this one." She mumbled, hands passing over her stomach. Hiccup crawled to the other end of the bed, holding his arms out to her. Astrid stepped into them, one arm stayed around her, the other swooped under her legs. Hiccup tipped them both back onto the bed; it took a minute to right themselves, Astrid sitting astride his stomach with a victorious smirk. Hiccup smiled sweetly, for once not a gleam of mischief in those emerald enchantments. He felt her stomach tentatively, fingers splaying over the bump, his grin growing eagerly.

"Hurry up." He told his unborn child. Astrid gave a soft laugh and shook her head.

"You muttonhead."

"Oh, come on. Don't tell me you're not looking forward to meeting Hiccup Junior." Astrid raised a brow. "Well, something Hiccup Junior, Fenrir or... uh... Fenrira. No, we had that. Um... Fenrari, Fenrar, Fen-something?"

"Leave it, your brain's going to explode." Astrid flicked his forehead, smiling at the cutely preplexed look on his face. "We could just call her Fen if we do get a her. Time will tell."

"Too much time." He muttered sulkily.

"I don't see why we need another baby, we've got you." She cooed teasinly, laying her hands along his jawline gently. "Wee ickle Hiccup, my lil' bubba." She pressed her forehead to his, noses brushing together. His hands were warm through her attire, kindly on her waist, his lips gracing over hers. Astrid smiled against his mouth, both uttering those three words together, Astrid's followed by two more- _you idiot._

* * *

 **Just some Haddock family time and then a wee bit of Hiccstrid, because I'm lovely. I think I'll wrap up Thawfest in the next chapter or so- I'm sure I had more written somewhere, but for the love of chocolate, I can't find them anyway :'(**


	43. Chapter 43

**To Guest- Thank you! Sorry-not-sorry for making you cry though, I can be a bit mean with feels :P**

* * *

"Ladies and gentle-Vikings, we are down to the Decider Round!" Hiccup announced, waiting for the excited cheers to die down. "Here, we will determine the final Thawfest champion, the champion of champions, if you will! The winner from each group will compete in a series of challenges, scored on their skill, determination, knowledge and overall attitude!" More cheering. Hiccup checked his notes, signalling to Gobber to blow the horn. "First up, we have Ingrid Haddock and her Changewing, Snapper!" His daughter and her dragon swooped in from the Dragon Nest, Snapper doing a few fancy aerobatics and Ingrid waving. "Alva Pendragon of our second group and her Nadder, Tip! I mean, Trip! Sorry!" He waved apologetically at Alva. Although she had lost the dragon and sledge races, she had beaten Alastor in all the other events, gaining the winner's medal. Alastor was quite happy to settle with third, beaten by a single point by Hagan. "And last but not least, we have Travis Kylbean with his Monstrous Nightmare, Firestorm!" Hiccup led the round of applause, dropping his notes on the floor as he did so. Aloe picked them up for him. "Thank you." Hiccup smiled. The three competitors were lined up in the arena, waving, dragons roaring, Firestorm on fire.

Fishlegs was waiting with the flag. The first event was a race out to sea, around and under cliffs and arches, circle around the ship with the red flag a few miles out and then get come back. The course they were supposed to take was also marked with red flags, something Hiccup had come up with because, you know, _red_. He had even worn his new red tunic just for today, flirting incessantly with Astrid.

Hiccup raised his arm and Fishlegs did too, his _red_ flag fluttering in a soft breeze. The chief did his waiting game again, just to be annoying. Astrid pinched his side, making him jolt and squirm. His arm went down either way and Fishlegs bashed the flag about. The racers were up and gone within a second. "That really hurt." Hiccup muttered. Astrid pouted and cooed, chucking him under the chin.

"Serves you right with your cheesy pick-up lines."

"Those... I don't need pick-up lines, your my _wife_. Been there, done that. Aren't you supposed to be supervising?"

"We both are."

"Aloe, you're in charge. Al, you're coming with us."

"What? Why?" Alastor stared at his parents incredulously. Astrid and Stormfly took off to catch up. Hiccup and Toothless stared at Alastor until he summoned Spike and followed. "This is pointless, I don't need to supervise too."

"A little extra help never hurt." Hiccup smiled. They didn't need Alastor to supervise though. Gobber had told Hiccup something _very_ interesting.

They joined the others soon enough, Ingrid and Snapper nowhere to be seen. Alva and Travis were shooting fireballs and spines back and forth, trying to knock the other out of the sky. Hiccup urged Toothless to dive between them. Trip recovered faster than Firestorm, lighter and smaller, getting a good hundred metres before Firestorm slowly started to gain on her. Hiccup went to check on his wife, see if she knew where their daughter was.

"I don't know exactly, but I've seen shadows on the rocks and water." Astrid pointed down. "If I had to guess, she's not far from the boat now. What's going on over there?"

"Just two very big competitive streaks. Look at Al! Awww, bless his little cotton socks!"

"Oh my gods, he really does like her!" Alastor was sat forward in the saddle, holding onto Spike's horns and peering over them, eyes on Alva. "That's so adorable!" Astrid beamed. Hiccup grinned. "No. No, don't you dare. Leave them alone."

"What? Oh, come _on_! I am the best at matchmaking, let me-"

"No!" Astrid had Stormfly fire a warning spine shot at her husband's head. "Let them figure it out on their own!"

"But-"

"Hiccup, I will strangle you. Oh! There she is!" Astrid pointed frantically. Ingrid and Snapper had materialised, swinging expertly around the mast of the ship. The other two racers weren't far behind, a bit clumsier turning the corner, but still good. Alastor and Spike were watching from above, tailing Alva and Trip. The boy was completely unaware of his parents and their little trick. He wanted to root for his sister, it was what he had to do as her brother, but he also _really_ wanted Alva to win. He wasn't sure why, but something about that look on her face, that sheer determination, the stubbornness, the eagerness of flying and racing, the competitivity of her expression... Her earthy brown eyes were fierce and locked on Ingrid, lips moving as she egged Trip on, flying faster and faster, her almost raven hair billowing in the window, coming lose from its braid. Snapper hadn't bothered to re-camouflage, so when Trip started trying to smack them off course per her rider's instructons, Ingrid had a few certain things to say.

"Oooh, this is going to get nasty." Hiccup worried. "She's got your communication skills... and stubborn streak, but Alva's the next generation version of you, oh gods..." Astrid glowered, but only for a second.

"He really is adorable." She gushed. Hiccup glanced over his shoulder and chuckled.

"Aww! Our little Al's lovestruck!" They high-fived and followed the racers, leaving Alastor to come to that realisation himself.


	44. Chapter 44

Hiccup grinned slyly at his children. Astrid had just told them, their expressions were priceless, Hiccup wanted nothing more than to capture those looks forever, but it was all over soon enough. Aloe was ecstatic, running excited laps around the room- _I'm going to be a big sister, I'm going to be a big sister!-_ Alastor was sceptical while Ingrid was just outright insulted. "Why didn't you tell us earlier?" She demanded.

"Reasons." Astrid replied flatly. "You could be a bit more, I don't know, _happy_." Ingrid pursed her lips.

"Babies aren't really my thing, but..." She shrugged. "You guys are _happy_. If it's another Aloe though, I don't think I can handle it." She nodded at her little sister, who was chattering relentlessly at Toothless and Stormfly, bouncing- _big sister, big sister, big sister_! Hiccup regarded his current youngest bemusedly, glancing sidelong at Astrid. She simply shook her head, puffing a strand of hair from her eyes. Alastor was next under scrutiny, smiling sheepishly.

"I kind of want a brother, but knowing my luck, he'd get a mix of Grampa Stoick and Grampa Fenrir."

"What, with the _Hiccup_ qualities?" Hiccup huffed. "I don't think that's going to work, bud."

"Well, you never know."

"I do know. You could have turned out like Dad or Dad-in-law, but did you? No. And why? Because Hiccup qualities are so much more efficent." Astrid glowered. Hiccup sank in his seat, an impish grin in place. "It's just Haddockness, milady, it can't be helped. Nature, nuture, etc. etc."

"Big sister, big sister, big sister! Wait..." Aloe stopped mid-skip, puzzling over something. Her parents, siblings and family dragons watched her curiously. "Does this mean I've got to be like Ingrid?"

"What? Why?" Hiccup marveled.

"I'm going to be a big sister. And Ingrid's _my_ big sister and she's _mean_. Do I have to be mean?"

"No. You have to be you."

"Awesome." She beamed. "I'm going to go and tell Hanson!" And, in the blink of an eye, she was gone. Hiccup sighed, smiling fondly.

"She's _so_ your daughter." Astrid said. Hiccup pressed his lips together, eventually nodding. There was no denying that one.

* * *

Aloe told Hanson. And her other friends. And her other friends told their parents who told _their_ friends who told their friends and then so on and so forth until the whole village knew. Hiccup gave in and just left the door to their hut open as visitors and gifts were streaming through. The Terrors had already gorged themselves silly on fish and bread, lazing around, bloated and content. Toothless and Stormfly enjoyed the attention and food, Snapper was nosing from upstairs with his rider. Alastor was leaning against Spike in his nest, busying himself with his set of dragon notes, comparing them to what was in the Dragon Books.

Vadik, Ada and Tuffnut wormed their way through the crowd outside the Haddock residence, bearing their own gifts. Astrid put Tuffnut's set of 'teething toys'- knives- to one side, forcing a semi-grateful smile. Ada presented her with something more practical- blankets. "I've been making them for a while now." She said proudly. Astrid felt the material, cotton soft and smelling sweetly of spikenard.

"I might just keep this for myself."

"Ooh, I want one." Hiccup grabbed a second from the pile in Ada's arms and swished it around his neck. "Ah, springtime fresh."

"You guys are weird."

"Coming from you! Blooming cheek." Hiccup laughed at Tuffnut's incredulous look. Vadik admitted he didn't have any gifts, but offered his congratulations. Hiccup ruffled his hair and sent him upstairs.

"Did _Tuff_ just call Mum and Dad weird?" Alastor puzzled. Vadik nodded. "Huh."

"Takes one to know one." Ingrid muttered. Vadik raised a brow at Alastor, who simply hunched his shoulders. _She's sulking_ , he mouthed. Vadik inclined his head. "Don't start." She warned as her friend approached. "I'm only _sulking_ because they didn't tell us when _they_ found out."

"Maybe they wanted to wait until Thawfest was over?" Vadik suggested. "I don't have all the answers, Ingrid, but... maybe you're jealous."

"Ex _cuse_ me?"

"Pardoned." Vadik smiled. She glared. Alastor hid behind his book- _oh, would you look at that?-_ "I'm just saying, with another baby, your parents are going to be distracted and maybe they won't have as much time for you. You're the oldest, you know how it was when he and Aloe were born." He jerked a thumb at Alastor. "Admittedly, you were younger and still needed some parental guidance, but now you can do your own thing, pretty much, and you don't like it!"

"I think you're on to something, Vad." Alastor chipped in.

"Did I ask for your opinion?" Ingrid retorted.

"No."

"Then shut up."

"Yes."

"Al, you're such a pushover." Vadik teased. "Ingrid, don't stress. Your parents are decent, they'll make time for you all." Ingrid hummed, stepping back from her dragon for a moment. Snapper's great head swivelled and he whined sympathetically. "I know what'll cheer you up. Race you to the cove." She glanced over her shoulder, the competitive light reigniting. "Al, you coming?"

"I like my head _on_ my shoulders, thank you." He waved at them absent-mindedly, engrossed in his book. Ingrid rolled her eyes, signalling to her Changewing to get his saddle from the rafters. Vadik ventured downstairs, pushing through the crowds again. He managed to battle his way to the back of the house, calling Jetstorm. Ingrid and Snapper were raring to go.

Alastor watched them take off through the window. Spike cooed and shifted, dozing pleasantly. Peering down at the crowds, Alastor could make out some of his friends' parents. He had expected his unborn sibling to cause a stir, but not on this magnitude. Maybe it was because Berk had gone so long without another royal baby, maybe because some of the Berkians hadn't been very old when Aloe was born and wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

Fire erupted under his skin and he ducked under the window.

Alva!

Oh gods, she was out there. With her mother, looking bored and wiping her nose on her sleeve. He risked a glimpse over the windowledge, biting his lip. Her gaze travelled past the house, doing a double-take as his blond mop vanished from sight. He counted to thirty and looked again. She was gone, her mother still there, ticked off. He stood up, trying to figure out where she'd gone.

"Hey."

"Oh buckets!" He startled violently, tripping over his own feet and falling over the bed. Alva's laughter rang against the ceiling.

"Oh _buckets_? You're so polite." She teased, moving to his side and helping him up. "Excited for the new baby?"

"Um... n-not as excited as, uh, as Aloe..."

"Yeah, she's sprinting laps of the village. I think the whole Archipelago knows she's going to be a big sister." Alva offered the window a quick glance, making a face at her mother. "She's such a snot." Alastor twisted his hands, managing a querying look. Alva sighed. "She wants me to show more interest in the clan, but I'm just happy flying Trip. It's alright for you, I suppose, you're under your dad's dragon-loving schemes. Mum's not such a big fan. She can tolerate them, but anything else? You'd be a Nadder's uncle. No offense, Spike." The Nadder trilled. "Anyway, I didn't come here to moan about Mum. Why were you hiding behind the window like some peeping Tom?"

"Oh, uh... well, um... crowds make me... nervous?" He tried. Alva wasn't duped. "You've seen me on the stage when Dad was away."

"I think you did alright."

"Ingrid did better."

"But that's just who she is." Alva shrugged. "You're the quiet, booky peeping Tom and she's Astrid incarnate, except your mum didn't die to have an incarnate, but you get where I'm going with this, right?" Alastor nodded. She smiled. "I personally think you'd be a great chief."

"W-what?"

"You heard me. Ingrid's all about violence and scaring people- well, outwardly she is. You... you're more strategic and peaceful, like your dad. I suppose two _nicey-nicey_ chiefs in a row wouldn't hurt, but Mum might have a fit. I've never seen so many books!" Attention suddenly diverted, Alva rushed to his corner, scooping up the book he had been reading. "Oh, wow!"

"Y-you can... borrow them if... if you want."

" _Really_?" She grinned at him. Alastor nodded. "I'll only take the one for now, but thank you!" She eyed the novels curiously, eventually deciding on the first one. Skimming the pages and walking back towards him, her smile brightened. "I'm not really allowed books, Mum prefers me training. And training and training and training some more, but hey." Alva laughed softly, tucking the big book under her arm. "Thanks." She repeated, slugging him in the arm.

"ALVA!" Her smile dimmed.

"I've got to go. It was nice talking to you and I hope you didn't do yourself too much damage flipping over that bed." Alastor tried to wave it off, half-smiling.

"ALVA!" Her mother bellowed again. Alva nodded farewell and retreated downstairs. Alastor stayed standing until she had definitely gone before his legs gave out and he sank onto the bed, heart pounding in his chest.

"Hey." Hiccup's head appeared over the top step. "Very smooth." Alastor flushed crimson. Hiccup laughed, sitting on the stairs, nodded approvingly. "You're welcome."

"Wh-what are you... what are you on about?" Astrid appeared behind her husband, glowering until he stood.

"I thought we talked about this." She muttered for Hiccup alone to hear.

"We did. But I need this in my life."

"No, you _want_ this. You don't _need_ it."

"Pfft." Hiccup shook his head. "We all need Alvastor." Astrid smacked herself in the forehead and then flicked him. Alastor watched them start playfighting, bewildered beyond all reason. Tuffnut was right- his parents were _weird_.

* * *

 **Just a filler, I'll get my plan up next! :D**


	45. Chapter 45

**I've had these next few chapters written for a while now, but I apologise in advance if they seem really fast-paced, I was just really excited to write them! ^_^**

 **To Guest- Thank you! And yes, Al likes a girl ^_^ I'm just nice like that :P And in a WEEK? That's awesome, thank you! :D For the rest, I try my best and I'm so relieved/glad that it's working, THANK YOU! ^_^ (This is my favourite face, in case you hadn't noticed ^_^ ) To all, I apologise for not updating lately, I've been trying to sort a few things out, but I'm back now! YAY!**

* * *

Vadik, even though he was welcome anytime, knocked one morning. Astrid was surprised to see him on her doorstep simply because he usually came and went as he pleased. "Morning, Vad. Last I checked, the Haddock door was always open to you."

"I know, but... I, um... needed to, uh, to talk to Hiccup please." The boy- nearing seventeen now, he was a young man- would not meet Astrid's gaze for more than a second at a time. His dark scruffy hair had been moderately combed and he had definitely attempted to tidy himself up. Astrid kept her knowing smile hidden, inviting him in and announcing his arrival to her husband. Hiccup startled awake and sat up properly, rubbing at his face tiresomely.

"Hi, Vad. Sorry, long night." The chief yawned and stretched, then slouched in his chair. "How are you this fine morning?" He grumbled, eyes shut. Astrid cleared her throat and he squinted at them instead.

"I'm... good, I suppose. Um... I wanted to... to ask you something..." Hiccup rolled his hand for his guest to continue. Vadik wrung his hands, something Alastor had done a million times, but the gesture was alien on the young man before them. Astrid gave her husband a tiny nod; Vadik didn't notice. "Would it... in any way be... would you let me, hypothetically speaking, you know... any chance that you would maybe, possibly, perhaps let... give me permission to... to-court-your-daughter?" He said the last bit in a rush, clenching his fists, digging his nails into his palms, looking to Hiccup, redder than red. Hiccup sat up a little straighter, a silent conversation passing between him and his wife. Astrid grinned and nodded eagerly, as excited for this as she always was for Snoggletog. Hiccup smiled too.

"Then I wish you all the best of luck. Keep an eye out for that axe though."

"Wait... you're saying I _can_?"

"You're braver than I ever realised." Hiccup's smile broadened. "And we'd be more than happy for you to... ah, get around Ingrid's walls. She's very stubborn, I can't imagine where she got that from." He shot a sly sidelong look at his wife, gaining a flicked ear in return.

"Just be warned, Vad," Astrid said, "if you upset her, you're a dead man."

"I know."

* * *

To everyone's surprise, Ingrid was _thrilled_. When asked about it at dinner, she said, "He's not a total idiot. I'm just glad you didn't pick someone like Barton."

"Barton's nice!" Aloe protested.

"You only like him 'cos he brings you pie." Alastor replied. "Does this mean Vad's going to be my brother-in-law?" Hiccup redirected his question to Ingrid.

"I don't know." Ingrid mumbled, pink. Astrid hit Hiccup's leg under the table, exchanging secretive smirks. "Look, that doesn't matter right now. I-"

"It does matter!" Alastor interrupted. "I'm planning your wedding! With Aloe." He added when the youngest Haddock cleared her throat. "There will be bouquets of maces and axes and you can wear your armour and-"

"And Terrors can sing for you!" Aloe added happily, giggling. "You've gone all red!" She teased. Ingrid glowered, crimson. Aloe laughed. "You will have the best wedding!" She claimed with a big grin.

"Now this sounds familiar..." Astrid fixed a stern look on her other half. Hiccup shrugged innocently.

"It's not my fault they're excellent matchmakers too." He gave his younger two a double thumbs-up. Ingrid hid her face in her hands. "Don't be like that, Ingrid. It's early days, they're just excited. No funny business though, young lady, or I'll... uh, build a really tall tower and lock you in. No, wait. We have dragons. Uh... sail you off the edge of the world. Or not." He hastily corrected, sliding down in his seat under his wife's glare. "Just no funny busness, let's stick with that." He smiled sheepishly.

"Mum, can I be excused?" Ingrid asked. Astrid nodded, her eldest disappearing upstairs in seconds.

"You two!" She hissed, rounding on her other children. "Stop being like him!" She waved a vague hand at their father.

"We can't help it." Aloe admitted.

"Besides, we've been waiting for this for, like, _ever_." Alastor rolled his eyes. Hiccup grinned slyly.

"Don't get too comfortable. You're next."

"Wait, what?"

"Two weddings to plan!" Aloe squealed. "Ooh, ooh! Can I be chief wedding planner for Berk? Pleeeeaaase? Please, please, please, please, _pleeeeaaase_?" Hiccup chuckled.

"I suppose we can put you in training."

"Yay! Thank you!" She poked her brother's face, laughing victoriously. Alastor wasn't impressed.

Later, when the children had retired for the night, Hiccup and Astrid sat on the floor by the fire, holding prongs with slices of bread, toasting them. Astrid was leaning against his chest, quite content with today's turn of events.

"We're good for Vadgrid? Ingrik?" Hiccup asked into her hair. Astrid nodded.

"Very good." She confirmed. "What's with this name joining thing though?"

"Seems to be the craze. We're Hiccstrid."

" _You_ are an idiot. _I'm_ the poor sod who married you."

"You'd have a very boring life without me." She hummed noncommittingly. Hiccup huffed grumpily. "I see how it is." He gasped, horrified as his toast fell into the fire. "No!" He breathed. Astrid laughed, biting into her own slice. "Hey, share!" He made a grab for it only to end up pinned to the floor with toast crumbs sprinkling over his face as she polished off her snack. "You're mean." He complained. "If Ingrid really is a mini-version of you, I feel sorry for Vadik."

"Shut your face." In response, he squished his face between his hands and started making immature kissing noises. Astrid sighed. "See? Id-i- _ot_."

* * *

News of Vadgrid (or Ingrik) spread quickly. Most, like the Haddocks, figured it was about time. Others were dubious, seeing as Vadik had little to his name, but they were happy for the young couple all the same. Hackett, however, decided now was the time to draw a line under Hiccup's ridiculous endeavours.

"You seriously cannot be considering letting your so-called _heir_ develop romantic relationship with that _bastard_ child?" He raged, voice travelling to draw in the vast Berkian audience. "You're staining the royal lineage, chiefs are supposed to be from strong and noble backgrounds! _Not_ intermingling with penniless fraud scum! Don't try and talk me round, Hiccup! Not this time! I've kept my fair share of secrets for you! Well, I say, no more! If you want to shame and jeopardise the entire future of Berk, be my guest! When you come to your senses, you'll know where to find me!"

"I'm guessing that'll be in the ale house then?" Hiccup replied calmly, wiping spittle from his face. "Bit early to be leaning on the drink, no?" Hackett coloured furiously, swaying and stumbling over his feet to keep his balance.

"Don't change the subject, _Hiccup_." He snarled. "It's bad enough you let her live," He jabbed a finger at Aloe, "let alone this shameful union!" Hiccup looked to his youngest, her eyes wide and tearful. She was old enough to understand that some tribes practised leaving babies to die on Death Hill. "Heck!" Hackett continued. "It's a miracle any of your scrawny brood survived infancy!"

"We don't do that anymore, Hackett."

"Yes, I'm well aware. You've turned this village into a bunch of soft-hearted, limpet-brained sheep!" He sneered. The crowd rumbled, displeased.

"I've turned this village into a humane, accepting and modernised civilisation without taking away any sense of identity and giving those too young and too fresh the chance I was given. Forgive me if that seems _soft-hearted_ , Hackett, but some of us actually cherish our children." Hackett blinked, taking a heavy step back. "How many know about your son, Hackett? The one you always wanted until he was born like me. You were all set to put him out in the wild. Your wife didn't like that; she took him and left, didn't she?"

"H-how do you know this?"

"Nothing happens on this island without me knowing about it, be it now or in the past. I did some research, I saw the records of your son's birth, saw the records of Olga leaving you, legally inclined to do so." Hiccup hunched his shoulders. "How old would he be now? Not much younger than my father, surely? How are we supposed to track him though, if we don't know his name? You never bothered to give him one, did you?"

"What's your point, Hiccup?" Hackett growled, hands furling into fists.

"My point is not everyone can have children. And even if they do, something could happen, they could lose one, maybe lose more. Appreciate what you have in life; some people aren't so lucky." Hiccup set a firm look on the older man. "Go home, Hackett. You're drunk. And you stink." Hiccup nodded to Rangvald and Bjorn Junior, who grudgingly escorted Hackett out.

"Dad." Ingrid said softly. She was watching her sister, pained and concerned. Hiccup turned to kneel before his youngest. She had worked herself into a state, tears streaming steadfastly down her pale cheeks.

"I-wasn't-meant-to-live?" She asked between great gasping breaths. Hiccup wrapped her in his arms.

"Neither was I." He said gently, smoothing her sodden hair from her face. "Don't tell the others, but you were the most important baby. We weren't going to leave you to the will of the gods. We needed you, Aloe, alot more than you needed us. And that's saying something; babies are very dependant on their parents." His expression turned gravelly serious. " _Very_ depandant." Aloe giggled and hiccuped. Hiccup wiped her small face on his sleeve and bundled her against his chest, rising. "Do you want to know why you were the most important?" He whispered, smiling as she nodded tentatively. "Because you're a hiccup, just like me. And us hiccups have to stick together. Isn't that right?"

" _Very_ right." She nodded again, firmly, mimicking his earlier look. Hiccup grinned and kissed the top of her head.

"That's my girl."


	46. Chapter 46

**To Guest- Thank you! ^_^ And Ingrid will be fine, don't worry :P You're too kind, THANK YOU! :D**

* * *

Hackett didn't let things lie, he didn't sober up. He drunk more in the recluse of his home, staggering out just after sunset. Hiccup was out at this time, running a few last minute errands that couldn't wait until tomorrow. Alastor was taking Spike for a nighttime flight while simultaneously spying on his sister and her new boyfriend. Not that Vadik had been given that title just yet, but they all knew it was coming.

When Ingrid spotted him, however, he had to quickly return home if he wanted his head to stay on his shoulders. He noticed Hackett outside his house, holding a torch in one hand and a bottle of some alcoholic beverage in the other. Alastor made to call out to him, to tell him that his dad wasn't home, when Hackett let a rag in the bottle and tossed it at the house. "Hey!" Alastor yelled. The fire was spreading quickly. Hackett ran around to the side of the house, throwing a second lit missile into the roof window. Alastor urged Spike into a dive, his dragon snatching the arsonist up in his claws and carrying him off. "Fire!" He shouted at the Vikings down below.

"ALASTOR!" Leaning to the other side, Alastor saw Toothless flying up to them. "What the heck is going on?"

"Hackett set fire to our home!"

"What? _You did what_? Drop him in the ocean, I- oh gods..."

"What?"

"Your mother and Aloe are in there! Toothless, go!" The Night Fury swept forward, Hiccup issuing orders. His riders swooped in, carrying carts of water. Alastor dumped Hackett in the sea and swivelled round, chasing after his father. When he caught up, Hiccup had run in, Toothless going in through the roof. Ingrid and Vadik were there, Vadik holding her back from racing in as well.

"Al! What happened?"

"Hackett." Alastor dropped from the saddle.

" _What_?" Ingrid fumed. "Where is he now, I'll kill him! I'll cut him open, I'll burn him from the inside out!" She continued to rage, stomping her feet, swinging her axe. She charged off when Rangvald arrived saying Hackett had pulled himself from the ocean. Vadik ran after her. Alastor directed the fire crew, despair flooding his chest. His parents were in there, his little sister... this was his _home_.

* * *

 **OK, I realised I'd done this WHOLE thing on Bad Hackett in one MASSIVE long chapter, so I'm breaking it into parts to keep things relatively spaced out. Sorry! ^_^**


	47. Chapter 47

Inside, Hiccup found his wife and daughter in the upstairs bedroom. A roof beam had fallen on Astrid's legs. Aloe was sobbing and coughing. Smoke still lingered in the air, the damage up here intense. Beddings, papers and books had gone up unbelievably quickly, he could smell mead. Aloe scrabbled for him. Toothless stood over the young girl, wings spread and trying to beat out what fires he could.

"Wake Mum up, please wake her up!"

"Talk to her, Aloe, get her attention, do something to wake her. I need to move that beam." Aloe nodded, wiping at her face determinedly. Hiccup shoved debris from the beam, slipping his hands under it and heaving. He managed to lift it somewhat. Aloe hurriedly pulled her mother out, calling for her. Astrid stirred, grimacing. Hiccup dropped the beam. "Astrid! No, no, no, stay awake. Oh gods..." The roof creaked overhead. There was so much smoke and fire damage up here, Aloe's coughs were becoming more and more aggressive. Hiccup snapped boards from the nearest bed and used tatters remains of bedding to make splints for his wife's legs. "Aloe, out. Let's go."

"Mum-"

"She'll be alright, don't worry." Hiccup assured, picking Astrid up bridal style. "Toothless, come here." The Night Fury was pawing out sporadic flames, but rushed to them. He bowed his head to flip Aloe onto his back. Hiccup carefully saddled too, doing his best not to jostle his wife. "Up, bud. Gently."

"There!" Alastor saw them first, coming out the top window. He ran forward, Spike after him. "Mum!" Astrid's head rolled against Hiccup's shoulder and she moaned softly.

"Al, take Aloe from here, clear her lungs, get her cleaned up. Rangvald, get Gothi. Dad!" Stoick barged through the crowds. He surveyed the damage.

"I'll get a clean up team for you here." Hiccup nodded his thanks, looking to Astrid. Her eyes were open a fraction, watching him.

"Hey." He brushed her singed hair back. "Astrid, hey."

"What took you so long?" She mumbled. Hiccup smiled, relief flooding his senses and bringing feeling back. Astrid returned it weakly, resting against his chest.


	48. Chapter 48

**Another short chapter, I'm sorry! But I had to break the really long one I had up otherwise it'd all be over in one night D:**

* * *

Hiccup personally attended to Astrid's legs, giving her a small dose of poppy milk to soothe the pain. She had been trying to get his attention the whole time he worked, only recieving this when he was satisfied her legs would heal properly in time. He stood next to her head, crouching to brush her hair back.

"I can't feel my baby." She whispered, tears threatening to spill. Hiccup's heart seemed to skip a beat- he had been so focused on her, he hadn't stopped to think about their unborn child. He cursed himself profusely. Astrid's fingers gripped his arm. "Hiccup..."

"It's alright." He assured, thinking quickly. Her bottom lip trembled. "Here, I'll show you." He shifted to the right slightly, resting his head against her small bump. Astrid's brow knitted together. Hiccup grinned and, "Boo!", a jolt thudded through her midriff. Hiccup's hand pressed against her stomach, feeling the baby squirming. A single sob escaped her lips, water works flaring to life in her relief. She held her arms out to him, crying against his shoulder, breathing her gratitude repeatedly in his ear. Hiccup massaged soothing circles into her back. "I told you it'd be alright, didn't I? Silly billy." He teased, planting a kiss on her temple. He felt her nod on his neck, moving again to sit on the bed, careful not to knock her legs. "I get to make leg jokes about you now. Ooh, how the tables have turned!" Hiccup smirked, pulling his sleeve over her hand and wiping gently at her face.

"Shut your face." Astrid muttered, grabbing his hands to stop him from doing just that. She curled up to his side as best she could, wincing. Hiccup gave her more milk of the poppy and stayed put while she dozed off, hugging her bump protectively.

* * *

 **I did say it'd be short! :P**


	49. Chapter 49

**Slightly longer chapter now. This is while Hiccup's looking after Astrid, Stoick's in charge.**

 **To Guest 1- Here's the next chapter! And cliffhangers do suck, I'm sorry-not-sorry :P**

 **To Guest 2- Hackett will get his come-uppence, hold your horses! :D**

 **To Guest 3- NOTHING BAD WILL HAPPEN TO THE BABY, DON'T WORRY! I'M GOING TO BE NICE THIS TIME! ^_^**

* * *

A strangled, guttural scream split the smokey silence. The crowd parted before Stoick, Ingrid marching through with a bloodied axe, dragging the sorry carcass of a weeping Hackett. She threw him at her grandfather's feet, where he struggled to kneel, cradling the stump of his right arm to his chest, thick blood flooding down his front. Stoick ordered for him to have that staunched, "but only because you've got hell to pay." He snarled. "Ingrid, find your brother and sister. Calm down."

"Oh, I'm calm. You," She booted Hackett in the ribs, "have no idea how lucky you are right now. If Dad doesn't kill you, I _will_." And with that, she flounced off. Vadik arrived, out of breath. He sighed, defeated, when he saw he hadn't caught up. He shook his head, doubling over.

"You wanted in." Stoick reminded him.

"Yeah... but... she... is... _fast_... and... she... was... pulling... _him_ along..." He took a deep breath, pressing his hands against his lower back, flexing his spine. "Ooh, everything hurts. Which way did she go?" Stoick pointed. Vadik saw the blonde marching off and groaned. "OK." He ran after her again. Stoick looked down at the whimpering Hackett.

"If you want any form of mercy, I'd keep your mouth shut." Hackett sniffled and nodded.

* * *

Under Hiccup's orders, Hackett's lost limb was attended to rather than simply bandaging it. Ingrid had appointed herself executioner, Vadik was doing his utmost to keep her under some sembelance of control, Astrid was bed-bound and under her mother's and mother-in-law's care while Alastor and Aloe took care of her various jobs. All four of them were seething- even _Aloe_ \- itching to get their own back. Their home had been salvaged and had been placed under repairs, but everyone wanted to be part of Hackett's trial. The council had been adjourned, the riders included, Hackett's traditionalist status was now mud. It was his friends that brought him before Hiccup and the council, shackled and shamed, shunned by his peer group. No-one had expected that of him, no matter how annoyed he became with the chief.

"Hacket Killian, you are brought to trial for treason against the chief of Berk, attempted murder-"

"I didn't mean to!"

"Attempted manslaughter," Hiccup continued with a frown, "arson and grievous bodily harm." Hackett looked confused. "Astrid's legs are broken." He wiped his nose on the back of his hand and scowled. "And she was terrified she'd lost the baby too."

"I didn't know they were in there!" He protested.

"And yet, you still tried to burn down our home! Why?"

"I was drunk!" Snotlout rose, stabbing the table rather than throwing his knife at Hackett's face.

"As I'm sure we're all aware, being under the influence of drink does not provide justification for bad actions, it simply shows us your intentions were not improvised, you'd been thinking about this for a while!"

"No!"

"You could have killed them!" Ruffnut raged, smacking the surface before her. "Aloe would have been crushed had Astrid not jumped in! Your second... flame-y thing burnt right through the supports! Are you saying your actions weren't intentional just because you were _drunk_? It looked pretty clear that those things you threw were ready-made!" Hackett was shaking his head, depserately looking for any form of answer.

"What about your daughter?" He demanded of Hiccup.

"Which one?"

"Ingrid! Look what she did!" He raised his stump.

"Oh, of course!" Hiccup exclaimed, smacking himself in the forehead. "We can't put him on trial, guys, he clearly needs compensation! Poor Hackett..." Hiccup's mock look of sympathy angered quickly. " _However_ ," he growled, "let's think about _why_ she did that, mm?" He turned to the council. "Any ideas?"

"Well, maybe because he doesn't appreciate Vadrik." Tuffnut nodded solemnly.

"Or that he openly disrespected her father, the chief." Fishlegs added.

"Set fire to her home, where she'd grown up." Spitelout interjected.

"Nearly killed her sister."

"And her mother."

"And her unborn sibling."

"Astrid's legs are broken."

"She's currently living in cramped quarters with her grandparents."

"Well, well, well, quite a bit then." Hiccup diverted his attention to Hackett once more. "Are you still going to say that she took your arm without any reason?" Hackett hesitated, eventually shaking his head. "So you admit to all that then?" A nod. Silence ensued for a moment, Hiccup watching the older man's thoughts whirr behind his eyes.

A smirk.

"But I'm nowhere near as bad as you."

* * *

 **BOOM!**


	50. Chapter 50

"Oh?" Hiccup raised a brow.

"I may have made my thoughts clear, but at least I'm not keeping secrets." Hiccup sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and counting to ten. Hackett smirked, revealing gaps in his teeth. "I think I have every right to _openly disrespect_ you, Hiccup. You're not a proper chief, are you? Haven't been for years." The riders and Stoick rose, all ready to argue. Hiccup raised his hand. "Admit it, Hiccup. Admit you have it."

"Have what? Great charm, great looks, what?"

"The slavemark." Shocked gasps broke through the Hall and then outrage.

"LIAR!" Someone screamed. Ada pushed to the front, displaying an anger and confidence no-one had ever seen from her. "Hiccup is one of the greatest chiefs Berk has ever had, there is no way he can have that accursed brand!"

"Is that so?" Hackett tried to stand. His friends pushed him down. "Check his arm! His left arm! Remember he wore those bandages for so long? He was hiding it!"

"For argument's sake, let's just say he actually has this slavemark," Snotlout snorted, "how would he have got it?"

"Dagur."

"He's dead."

"Not when he gave Hiccup that."

"And you're so sure about this _because_?"

"Because Dagur told me. Because _Hiccup_ made me promise not to say anything to anyone to stop me being tried back then."

"Hiccup?" Hiccup looked to his father. "Just to sort this, will you show them your arm?" Hiccup smiled.

"Of course." He undid the straps on the greave, tucking it under his right arm so to pull his sleeve up. He showed his forearm. Hackett paled, gawping. "No mark. That's a burn from dragon training... as is that one, that one and that one. This one is a scar from that time with Dagur, he cut my arm quite badly. And that one, if I remember right, is when I tripped over Spike's tail and got my arm caught on a hot pan over the fire. No slavemark." In fact, the scar Dagur had supposedly given him was truly self-inflicted, running from the crook of his elbow to his wrist, distorting the actual mark to appear as burns and scars from life as a dragon trainer. Hiccup had effectively removed the mark and the only ones that knew about it were the ones who had helped him get rid of it. "I believe that brings us to your-"

"NO!" Hackett bellowed. "You did something, you got rid of it!"

"There was nothing to get rid of, Hackett."

"But you said-"

"I said to keep whatever Dagur told you to yourself as to not cause problems here. We all know how much of a liar he was, he'd have done anything to unseat me and mine. Now, as I was saying, your sentence." He looked questioningly to the council. They were whispering to each other, minor disagreements rising only to be quelled by Stoick. A couple of minutes passed before they all nodded. Stoick rose.

"The council finds Hackett guilty of all charges and has settled to have him banished."

" _What_? No!" Ingrid stomped her foot. "Dad, they can't be serious!" Stoick motioned for her to be quiet. Ingrid coloured angrily, gripping her axe with white knuckles.

"Before he leaves, he is to fix the chief's home and restore the destroyed belongings. He himself will be branded as a traitor and he will have an hour to pack what he can before we send him off. Hackett, you were a good friend of my father, I don't know what happened to you, but it is no longer accepted. _You_ are no longer accepted." Stoick crossed his arms.

"You can't do this!"

"Well, we can't _now_." Hiccup shook his head. "We've already done it."

"How do you expect me to do anything with this?" He waved his stump angrily, wincing and clutching it to his chest again.

"The same way Vikings have for many generations." Stoick said crossly. "Deal with it."


	51. Chapter 51

**Just a short chapter on some petty revenge while her legs are broken ^_^**

* * *

Astrid, being bed-bound, was furious, but Hiccup sat her on Toothless one day and they went for a wander. It wasn't long before they reached their residence, still under repairs, with Hackett struggling with his one hand. Toothless snarled.

"Easy bud." Hiccup soothed, walking alongside the Night Fury.

"Hiccup, can I have my bag?"

"Am I going to find out what's in it?" Hiccup queried. Astrid gave an unbelievably and uncharacteristically innocent smile. Hiccup, curious as to what was in her bag, handed it over. He had been given it as he had left his parents, but was forbidden from looking in it. Even with busted legs, he wasn't brave enough to take her on.

Hackett stopped when he saw them, pile of lumber under his arm crashing to the floor and on his toes. He hopped about, yelping. Astrid took out a small package, grinning wickedly. Hiccup and Toothless shared a glance and decided to stay out of it. She threw it, scarlet paint splattering across the ground. Hackett scrambled mid-hop, arms flailing and landed heavily on his backside.

"Oh no! Hiccup, Hackett's been hurt! We've _obviously_ got to forgive him! Ooh, poor baby..." Astrid glared, a string of what had to have been the foulest, most hateful curses and cusses Hiccup had ever heard tumbling from her lips like rain from a storm. Hackett kept looking to the chief as she tossed resentment and paint bombs alike, but Hiccup still did nothing. Hackett was to be exiled, he had already been branded, a viciously red _T_ on his temple. Hackett was no longer his problem.

He was, in fact, far more interested in Astrid's missiles. He suspected some of them had ground spices and herbs in, the irritating kind that the twins were experts in finding. Red rashes began to appear on any exposed, unpainted skin. Astrid didn't notice her supplies were dwindling until she got to the last one- this amused her so. This last one was bigger than the rest and she cradled it in her hands with a smile that made Hiccup want to run and hide. Toothless mewled, pawing at his ears. "Hackett, sweetie," Astrid grinned maliciously, "I'm sure you understand now, don't you?" The shamed man nodded, trying and failing to find his feet for the umpteenth time. "Good. Then you can take this to the fires of Hell." Astrid lobbed her final weapon, accuracy on point. It erupted straight across Hackett's face, flaring into his eyes. "OK." Astrid told her husband. "I'm done now."

"What was in that last one?" Hiccup asked, directing Toothless away.

"You don't want to know."

"Um... maybe a bit?"

"What's the most painful thing in you can get in your eyes?"

"Uh..."

"Put it all together." Hiccup grimaced. "Don't feel sorry for him."

"I don't. I feel sorry for his eyes more than anything, my gods..." He rubbed at his own eyes. Say what you like about Astrid, but once you've endangered her children, there was no escape. Her revenge would scar for the rest of mortal and spiritual life.

* * *

 **I am out of prewritten chapters for this as of now, I probably should have done more on this one, but hey ho :P What else can I do to Hackett? 3:)**

 **And for those of PJO/HoO fandom, my 100th fic is up! Dark Calypso... :D**


	52. Chapter 52

**To Guest 1- Ahh, thank you! ^_^**

 **To Guest 2- OFF WITH HIS HEAD! You're not alone there :P And will do! :D**

 **And just some father-daughter time requested by Iris Patton :)**

* * *

"Dad, are you alright?" Ingrid plonked herself in a seat beside her father, laying her axe on the table. He raised a brow at her and she hurriedly put her treasured weapon between her feet. "What's with the face?"

"Hackett."

"Get over it, Dad. He's an as-" Hiccup settled a pointed look on her, "bum." She finished, pressing her lips together. "You're not going to freak again, are you?"

"I'm mad at what he did, he is very much a bum, but... I've never banished anyone before and... well..." He shrugged and sighed. "I don't know." Ingrid noticed as he wrung his hands, the tension in his shoulders, sighing herself. "I did the right thing, right?"

"No-one wants him here."

"That doesn't necessarily makes it right... but... I don't know, he... he's Hackett, he was always one of those Vikings Dad used to tell me about, great heroic stories, trying to get me to stop being me and more like the Viking son he wanted. Dad grew up hearing about Hackett too, he was just this amazing series of stories of big deeds and saving people, fighting dragons, all that." He exhaled slowly, pushing his hands through his russet hair. Ingrid smiled sadly.

"He didn't stay like that though, did he? He turned against his chief and tribe, even his own wife and child. Look what he did, Mum and Aloe, our home, Bubba Haddock... and what he accused you of as well." Hiccup could hear the temper rising in her voice, resting a quelling hand on her arm. Ingrid took a deep breath to calm herself. "If he's turned out like this, Dad, what else could he do?"

"You chopped his hand off, he's going to struggle for a while."

"That's the least he deserved." Ingrid muttered. "You should have let me-"

"Ingrid, no. And I'm not saying that because I don't think you're not capable of doing something like that, but... it stays with you. I don't want that on your mind."

"But Dad-"

"No."

"He deserves it."

"Yes."

"He's not going to last long in exile."

"No." Hiccup agreed, rubbing at his eyes.

"Are you going to be alright, Dad?"

"This is... just going to take some getting used to." He hesitated. "Should I have let your mum throw those paint bombs?"

"Yes." Ingrid replied instantly. "We were watching from the hill, that was _brilliant_. And I saw Hackett on my rounds this morning, he looks like he got attacked by a swarm of bees. And he still has paint in his beard." She grinned mischievously. "Look, Mum needed some sort of payback and that was the most efficient in her state." Hiccup made a face, chewing his lip. "It was that or she would have tried to walk." He nodded and then shook his head. "We're stubborn."

"I've noticed."

"How much longer until we can kick Hackett out?"

"Not long."

"Can I burn his ship?" Hiccup just looked at her. "Put a hole in it? You're really boring." Ingrid stuck her tongue out. Her father replied likewise, but he still looked glum. "I know what'll cheer you up, but gods forbid, I hate this game. Maces and Talons?"

"You don't like Mace and Talons."

"That's because you cheat."

"I don't cheat." Hiccup laughed softly. "You just don't like losing."

"Let me win."

"That's not how it works, Ingrid."

"Just once."

"It'll be a null victory."

"I can work with that." Ingrid got up to get the game, her axe falling sideways and clattering loudly against the floorboards. Hiccup hissed, jumping to his feet and flailing his arms. He looked round wildly up at the stairs, listening. Ingrid stood still. When her mother didn't shout at them for waking her up, they both let out a breath they hadn't realised they were holding. "Sorry." Ingrid whispered. Hiccup sank into his seat, hand on heart.

"My life just flashed before my eyes, holy crap." Ingrid laughed, snorting and clamping a hand over her mouth and nose. Hiccup snickered and started making pig noises.

"Shut up."

"Rude. I'm definitely not going to let you win now."


	53. Chapter 53

**To Guest 1- *snaps fingers* Thank you! And I'm not done with Hackett yet, don't worry! ^_^**

 **To Guest 2- That is GENIUS! I'm going to use that, you don't mind, do you?**

 **To Guest 3- Thank you! ^_^**

 **To everyone else, for those of you who like PJO/HoO, my 100th fic is that, might have mentioned it,** _ **A Titan's Wrath**_ **\- basically, Dark!Calypso! ^_^ Secondly, does anyone watch Miraculous Ladybug? 'Cos I've got a fic going for that too :P I'm on a roll at the moment :D**

* * *

Alastor and Aloe went sure how to best lopping Hackett's hand off, but that didn't stop them from pulling a few _harmless_ pranks. Alastor, with gloves, had gathered a great deal of poison ivy and ventured to Hackett's house, rubbing everything and anything he could find with the plant- the bedding, the bed, spare clothes, boots, weapon handles, chairs, _everything_. Even parts of the floor and walls, _especially_ in the bathroom.

Aloe, on the other hand, wasn't _as_ malicious, but it was impossible to deny her creativity. She sabotaged Hackett's cutlery and crockery. Alastor wasn't sure _what_ she did exactly, but he knew what the outcome would be- if Hackett tried to eat with a spoon, it would break; with a fork, the prongs would bend and not pick anything up; a knife wouldn't cut anything, she had blunted the blade until it was as useful as Arne. The bowls had been poked with miniscule pin-prick holes that leaked their contents all over the table and, therefore, Hackett too. Plates would break when he tried to pick them up and cups were missing handles or bottoms or both. But Hackett wouldn't notice anything amiss until he actually needed any of it, because Aloe had masterfully put it back exactly where she had found it. "That's just petty." Alastor told her as they watched Hackett return home for the last time.

"Hackett's petty." Aloe replied under her breath, using one of her father's spyglasses to see her work unfold. Within minutes, Hackett was itching like crazy and had 'broken' three mugs. Alastor had his mother's dual-spyglasses and grinned as stage one of their plan ensued. They were lying on their stomachs at the top of the hill looking down on the eastern quarter of the village, almost directly into Hackett's home. A few bushes concealed them from passing glances, but not from overhead dragons. Hiccup soon joined them, curious.

"Oh gods, what have you two done?"

"Our motto is confuse, don't abuse. But we broke it a little seeing as he set fire to our home." Alastor handed over the long-lookers.

"Is that... poison ivy?"

"Yup." Alastor said proudly. "And look what Aloe did to his stuff!"

"Remind me not to get on in either of your bad books." Hiccup muttered. "When did you do this?"

"While he was working."

"Sneaky buggers. Wait, you've got that look- what else have you planned?"

"You're aware of Fireworms, right?" Alastor smiled sweetly. Aloe buried her face in her arm and coughed heavily. Her lungs would recover, it was just taking a bit longer than she liked. Hiccup sat between them, massaging soothing circles in his daughter's back to soothe her breathing. "We may or may not have redesigned his bedroom." Alastor continued after his sister nodded she was alright. "Fireworms aren't the comfiest of creatures."

"You-"

"Put a ton of them in his mattress, yes, yes we did and no, nothing you can do to stop it. See? He'll get mad with his bowls and such, stromp off to go to the toilet and get a nasty bite on the bum from a group of Terrors-" Hiccup snorted and shook his head. _DO NOT_ _get on the wrong side of these two_ , he silently confirmed. "-and then he'll waddle off to bed, grumbling and cursing. He won't complain, because he is fully aware of the fact that he had this coming. He'll drop all that weight on his bed, the Fireworms won't like that. You know how hot they burn, Dad, and what they can do as a pack."

"He's going!" Aloe hissed excitedly.

"I'm really worried about you two."

"Oh, don't be. We'll go back to our usual lovable selves when he's no longer here." Alastor retrieved another spyglass from his satchel and grinned. Hiccup, depsite himself, had to watch. Seconds passed in silence and then an ear-splitting yowl. Hackett raced out of his home, arms wildly flying in every direction, glowing blobs of flame all over, scurrying over his clothes and skin, knocking his helmet off, burrowing into his hair and beard. Neighbours rushed out to see what all the racket was and froze. _Everyone_ knew the torment Fireworms could bring, but no-one seemed particularly eager to help.

Toothless crooned and pawed at his nose, nuzzled his rider. Hiccup stood. "Ah, what? It's just getting good!"

"Yes, I know. But I'd much rather he didn't burn anyone else's home down too." The siblings shared disgruntled looks, but nodded. Hiccup mounted and Toothless took off. They swooped down to pick up one of the ever-prepared carts of water, flying low and dumping the icy contents on Hackett's head. The tiny dragons steamed and squealed, vanishing within seconds. More swarmed from Hackett's house as their bretheren scarpered.

"YOUR BRATS DID THIS!" Hackett raged as the Night Fury landed. "DO YOU NOT HAVE _ANY_ CONTROL OVER YOUR KIDS?" Alastor nudged Aloe and they started down the hill, stopping part of the way down when Hiccup motioned to them. Hackett whirled round, saw them instantly. Even from here, they could see the crimson flush flooding over his face. He took a step forward and Toothless fired a warning shot.

"Hackett, I'm bored of you now. Get your stuff and go. Rangvald! Can you make sure the boat's ready, please?"

"Yes, Hiccup!"

"Thank you!" Hiccup called as his assistant ran off. "Hackett, don't just stand there. Don't you remember the terms of your exile? You've an hour to pack what you can, chop chop. The sooner you're off this island, the sooner we can all get on with our lives." Hackett silently fumed, Hiccup could envision steam coming out of his ears, boiling point. The ex-Berkian snatched up his helmet and stomped into his smoking home. Hiccup sighed, pulling at his face. "ALASTOR! ALOE!" He yelled.

"Uh oh."

"NOW!" When neither sibling moved, Toothless sprung up, soaring over them and snatching them up in his claws, carrying them off. Toothless looked down at them and smiled gummily. Hiccup leant over the side of his best friend and laughed. "You're not in trouble, I just needed to make a show."

"I'm going off you." Alastor did a very dramatic, very over-exaggerated frown. Aloe folded her arms and turned her head away, nose up.

"I'll make you pie." Hiccup offered. That brightened the pair instantly.

"OK! We like you again!"

"Good to know."


	54. Chapter 54

**Inspired by Lauralkelley99**

* * *

"Wait, back up." Tuffnut made a 'T' with his hands. "He's _going_?"

"Um... yeah, that's what you all agreed on."

"But we didn't get to do our prank! Sis, we need a new plan." The twins turned their backs on Hiccup, heads together and whispering to each other. Hiccup didn't even bother talking them out of it, he had no power to stop them pranking people. Instead, he stood and watched as they discussed, minute nods and shakes of the head, the odd pinch here and there. They eventually agreed on something, shaking hands and smashing helmets. "See ya in a bit, H."

"Please don't set fire to anything."

"Well, there goes the grand finale." Ruffnut muttered. "Come on, bro. Before he tries to take anything else away."

"Whoa, no. I want to watch." They stopped, shoulder-to-shoulder, hands on their hips.

"Then you, _mister_ , must take the solemn oath-" Tuffnut began.

"And not interfer with our marvelous plan." His sister finished.

"Yeah, yeah, I take the solemn oath. Just go, before I change my mind." They grinned at him, hopping onto their Zippleback. Hiccup quickly followed on Toothless, not surprised to find all three of his children and Vadik atop the hill overlooking Hackett's home. "What did you do?"

"Skunks."

"Slimy bastards. Oh crap- I mean, fuck... oh to hell with it- don't repeat any of that, any of you, your mother will kill me." Hiccup sat next to them, Aloe immediately climbing into his lap. Hiccup bundled them in his cloak and they all watched as the twins ventured in. "You three didn't put them up to anything, did you?"

"What? Us? Dad, we're offended. We'd _never_ do something like that!"

"You did, didn't you?"

"Yeah." Alastor grinned. Hiccup had to bite the inside of his cheek to prevent another foul-mouthed spiel.

In the hut, the twins offered to help pack. And by pack, they meant remove something that Hackett had just put in a trunk or a bag. Hackett didn't notice at first, blowing his top when he did. "OUT!" He ordered. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

"Not your house!" Ruffnut sang teasingly. "Not in a half hour anyway. Bro, what do you say we get this house? We could fix it up, rent it out to any visitors to the island. Like a home away from home."

"But what if we get more than one visitor?" Tuffnut mused, scratching at his arm. "Maybe we could have a whole line of homes away from homes all over the island! Sis, I think we're onto something here. Why am I really itchy?"

"Me too!" Ruffnut agreed, itching at her face. Hackett scratched his neck and the twins gasped as one. "He has fleas!" They chorused. Hackett stared at them incredulously. "FLEAS! HACKETT HAS FLEAS! GET HIM OFF THE ISLAND!"

"Oh my gods..." Hiccup hid his face amongst his daughter's hair, regaining what little composure he could. He looked up to see the twins sprinting laps around Hackett's home, scratching furiously, red marks on their skin.

"FLEAS! HE'S INFESTED OUR HOLIDAY HOME WITH _FLEAS_!" Composure gone, all four them where in a silent fit of the giggles. "WITCHCRAFT!" Tuffnut proclaimed, skidding to a stop. Ruffnut collided with him and they ended up in a very itchy heap on the floor. They scrabbled about the grass, rolling and twisting, desperately trying to rid themselves of Hackett's bugs, wailing in protest the whole time. Villagers were watching at a safe distance, as amused as the Haddocks atop the hill. "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THESE FLEAS WON'T GO! ITCHY TEETH, ITCHY TEETH, WHY ITCHY TEETH?"

"SAVE YOURSELVES!" Ruffnut ordered dramatically. "IT'S TOO LATE FOR US!"

"WILL YOU STOP?" Hackett had appeared now, holding an axe in his remaining hand. "IT'S NOT FLEAS! It's poison ivy." He muttered, glaring up at the kids who had caused this. Said kids waved. The twins were on their feet in a second.

"Poison ivy?"

"You're going to have to clean the whole house from top to bottom to get rid of it."

"Ugh, _cleaning_." Tuffnut's shoulders sagged in defeat. Ruffnut grimaced. "Sis, I say we burn it down and start from scratch."

"Agreed. But that doesn't rule out you having fleas." She told Hackett, wagging a finger at him. "Tuff, I think we need to see Gothi."

"Itchy teeth..." The twins summoned Barf and Belch and were gone in seconds. Hackett glowered up at the hill.

"HADDOCK!"

"WHICH ONE?" Ingrid called back.

" _HICCUP_ HADDOCK!"

"Dad, it's for you."

"I'm well aware. Oop." He tipped Aloe off and rose. "Come on, bud. Let's go and see what the fleabag wants this time." Toothless crooned and shook his head, ears flapping. "Be like that then. I'll go on my own." Hiccup started down the slope. His Night Fury stayed with the children, lying down behind them and cocooning them in his tail. He smiled toothlessly at his rider, chortling.

Hiccup stopped ten feet from Hackett, not wanting any of the fleas/poison ivy. Hackett had red raw marks all over, itching at them furiously. "What?"

"Don't you think enough is enough?" Hackett growled. "Your kids, your wife, your friends. Do something!"

"I am. I'm kicking you off the island. Consider it this way- the sooner you're gone, the sooner you can leave my kids, my wife, my friends and my island alone. You've dug yourself a very deep hole, Hackett. I'm not sure things would be the same for you if you stayed." Hiccup glanced at the sun in the sky. "I say you've got about twenty minutes. Rangvald should have your boat ready by then. Don't just stand there looking more gormless than usual, Hackett, you're running out of time."

"I hate you."

"I don't care."

"This isn't over."

"Yes it is."

"I'll come back."

"I'd rather you didn't."

"You lied to everyone."

"No, _you_ lied to everyone. You're only mad now because the truth has come out and it's taken your hand, your home, your dignity and your status." Hiccup shrugged. "I've things to do. I'll see you in fifteen minutes and _only_ to make sure you're definitely off my island for good." Hackett coloured angrily. Hiccup swivelled on his heel.

"You'll lose it. All of it." Hackett told him. Hiccup stopped at the foot of the hill. "You won't hold onto anything you care for."

"Are you threatening me?" Hackett stayed quiet. Hiccup half-turned, looked back with a frown. "You've already lost it all. But I'm sure we can find something else for you to lose if you say another word." Hiccup waited. "What's that, Hackett? Nothing? Good. I've decided you're leaving now. Anything you haven't packed will be burnt with your house. Gods know we could do with some new designs around here. Maybe the twins really will make a fortune from their holiday homes."


	55. Chapter 55

The Haddocks, Hildegard and Vadik were the only ones who bothered to turn up to see Hackett off. The Haddock children were there to give some final parting gifts. Astrid was there to make sure they didn't, Vadik was there to be her legs. Hiccup was there simply because it was his job. Hildegard was there to care for Astrid, making sure she was comfortable on Meatlug- who they had borrowed _with_ permission, mind- and that she was definitely unarmed.

Hackett's boat was a simple fishing vessel, he had been given the traditional supplies to last three days, he had what he had managed to pack and that was it. The twins, still rather scratchy, harnessed Barf and Belch to the boat and hauled it out into the water, releasing the attachments and returning to their chief's side. "Bye Hackett!" They chorused, waving handkerchiefs. "Miss you already! NOT!"

"I will give you everything I own to let me sink that ship." Ingrid begged her father.

"I paid for everything you own, so technically it's mine."

"You didn't pay for it, Mum did."

"And where did she get the money?"

"That's besides the point." Ingrid muttered. "Please? Just one _tiny_ little hole, so it's not immediate... no, he could fill it if I did that." Her brow creased unhappily and she folded her arms. Hiccup brushed her hair back from her eyes and smiled. "I still think you should have let me kill him."

"Ingrid," Vadik stepped forward, "he has very little supplies, he's been branded a traitor and he's still adjusting to only having one hand. One could say he's as good as dead already."

"My way would have been better."

"Undoubtedly." Vadik smiled. Hiccup glanced over at his wife, grinning. Astrid nodded once, glaring at the small ship. She could celebrate Vadrik later, Hiccup decided. He turned back to watch the boat edge closer to the horizon, keeping a firm grip on the twins' arms.

"Will you let _someone_ sink that ship?"

"No."

"Buzzkill." Ruffnut grumbled.

"I resent that remark."

"We resent you."

"Do you want to be on a boat as well?"

"No."

"Then shut up."

"Bossy boot." Tuffnut huffed.

"I was waiting for that." Hiccup sighed. "Haven't you got something else you could be doing? And not sinking ships or blowing things up. There are a couple of fields that need clearing for Spring."

"But Spring's forever away." Hiccup raised a brow. "Fine." Ruffnut pursed her lips, arms crossed over her chest. "I just want to make my point and say you're missing out on a perfect opportunity to inflict some proper damage on the prat that burned your house down, seriously wounded your wife and endangered your children, born and unborn."

"I put rats in his food."

"Ooh, you sly bugger." Ruffnut grinned approvingly. Tuffnut's hand whipped into the air.

"Did you-?"

"Put Stinkdragons amongst his clothes, yes. Yes I did. Are you crying?"

"I'm so proud." Tuffnut wiped at his eyes, smiling stupidly at the sky above and mouthing a thank you to the gods. "Aaah, H, you get us."

"Whoa!" The twins had lunged forward, establishing a Thornston Sandwich. "Ribs... breaking... ow, ow..." Hiccup wiggled his arms and managed to twist free. "It's pointless calling you two insane-"

"We do like to hear it though."

"Guaranteed." Tuffnut added with a wicked grin.

"Undoubtedly. Just go." Hiccup waved them away. "Those two are going to be the death of me."

"Not if I get there first." The others said, sharing high fives. Hiccup groaned, shoulders slumping defeatedly. "Ah, poor bubba." Astrid cooed teasingly. "We love you really. Most of the time." She added under her breath, but still loud enough for him to hear. Hiccup straightened, playful smirk across his lips. A frown slowly worked its way onto Astrid's features and she planted her hands on her hips.

"I've so many years of leg jokes to make up for."

"One joke and I'll brain you."

"Oh, if only you could _catch me_!" Hiccup pressed the back of his hand to his forehead and pretended to feel faint.

"Meatlug, spew."

"Holy son of a- Toothless, we're leaving!"

* * *

 **Sorry it's not much, it's just until I start on the next few chapters! Next time I update, I'll be nineteen! :D**


	56. Chapter 56

**To Guest 1, that guest (twice :P )- Thank you thank you thank you! Apologies on the belated reply though, things have been a bit topsy turvy here, but thank you! ^_^**

 **To Guest 2- With regards to Astrid being abusive to Hiccup, there are several points here- firstly, she is not doing it out of spite, temper or the feeling of inadequacy, like she did in the first HTTYD movie. Secondly, in the TV series and HTTYD 2, Astrid's 'abusive' behaviour is her way of communicating affection- she had been raised a warrior, warriors don't have time for** _ **feelings**_ **, it's just a typical Viking-warrior/general warrior thing. It's how she relays her thoughts through verbal and non-verbal communication and everyone accepts that because, on Berk, it is most likely the norm. Thirdly and finally, we all know Hiccup and Astrid will probably terrorise each other until their dying dies, it's an unspoken agreement. Hiccup will undoubtedly invent something- say, Dragonfly One- and Astrid will support him but** _ **only**_ **until a certain point. She loves him, she will encourage him, but she knows when to draw the line whereas Hiccup will keep pushing, '** _ **If you say Dragonfly Two, I'm locking you up'**_ **. Essentially, being 'abusive' to each other is just play-fighting, Viking Edition. It's Hiccstrid, what else can be expected?**

 **To all, I'd give the old spiel of apologies and excuses, but this time, I just haven't really felt like updating anything for a while now and it's really getting me down. I'll get an idea and then shun it five seconds later, I just don't know what to do. For now, have some Hiccup-Alastor/father-son moments requested by Jem48893.**

* * *

"Instead of gawking at her, why don't you... oh, I don't know... _go and talk to her_?"

"Like you went to talk to Mum at my age?"

"Touche." Hiccup started working around his son, having allocated this time to help Gobber and his small army of apprentices in the workshop, Alastor being one of his 'soldiers'. "But things are a little different for you and Alva than they were for me and Astrid."

"How so?"

"For starters, you're not burning the village down every five seconds."

"Aye." Gobber agreed from over by the anvil.

"I didn't ask for your opinion."

"Ya gettin' it anyway, chief." Gobber nodded at Hiccup. "What happened to tha' Haddock Charm, eh?" Hiccup quirked a brow at his son questioningly. Alastor just shrugged. Gobber hobbled over. "Laddie, ya father's right. Ya ain't at the disadvantage he was, ya've not got a thing ta hold ye back. Go and talk to ye lass, go on."

"And say what?"

"Ooh, conversation starters. I love these." Hiccup rubbed his hands together excitedly. His old mentor simply sighed, yanking a bent sword from the pile. "Tuffnut **(Tumblr)** came up with a good one- what if birthmarks were places where someone killed you in your past life?"

"I can't ask that!"

"Why?"

"Because... because that's... uh..."

"Straight up delusional." Gobber chipped in. Hiccup blew a raspberry in protest, pulling his sleeve up as high as it would go.

"Look, my birthmark's here." A splodge on his arm. "I could have been shot with a poisoned arrow or something, maybe bled out."

"Well, I'd hate to know what my birthmark means."

"Where is it?" At Gobber's expression, Hiccup narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Or is it somewhere we would really rather not know?"

"Where's Al's?" Gobber said quickly, distracting Hiccup for the time being.

"On my side." Alastor replied, fingers poking his waist.

"Maybe you were stabbed. Or skewered. Or-"

"Dad."

"What?"

"This isn't helping."

"I don't see you coming up with any bright ideas."

"Wee lad's not gettin' a word in edgeways." Gobber shook his head at Hiccup, turning back to his work. "Stick ye tongue out again, boy, and I'll chop it off." Hiccup clamped a hand over his mouth, eyes widening innocently. "Now, if ya ain't gonna help, get out me shop. Go on, naff off."

"Rude." Hiccup muttered. "Come on, Al, he's clearly getting grumpy in his old age." Hiccup ducked a red-hot object that was slowly resembling an actual sword and hurried from the forges. Alastor followed with a quick wave to Gobber. "Help me out here, bud, there's only so much genius in this head of mine."

"So, quite a bit then?"

"Was that an insult or not?"

"Probably, 'cos now that I think about it, I think your hair makes up most of your head."

"Oh, ha ha. Been talking to your mother, have you?"

"There is some genius in there."

"Why do I even bother?" Hiccup threw his hands up in despair, flicking Alastor's ear. "Don't give me that look. I'm trying to help you and you're just being mean." The boy nodded and shrugged admittedly. Hiccup wrinkled his nose. "Put the birthmark idea to a Plan B. You could always go up to her and say..." He paused dramatically. " _Hi_."

"Oh, sweet Thor, why didn't I think of that?"

"Your attitude is up here-" Hiccup flung a hand to the highest he could reach, "you need to bring it down here, buddy." He smacked Alastor somewhat playfully in the stomach. "Ask her to train with you, it's what Ingrid and Vad do."

"I can hardly hold a sword or an axe or throw a spear. I'll probably poke her eye out or chop her head off or something."

"Show her how to make one then. Be all casual about it, like yeah, make sharp stabby things all the time, la-di-da, and then _give it to her_. 'For you'." He said, handing an imaginary weapon to an imaginary girl with a slight bow. "It's like flowers, but for women like Astrid and Alva. Trust me, it works."

"Didn't Mum try to take your other leg with it?"

"She fell. No, honestly, she did. That was my fault though, I was lying on the floor."

" _Why_?"

"It's a surprisingly good place to think."

"You're your own worst enemy."

"Not the first time I've heard that." Hiccup smiled. "So, what about it?"

"About what?"

"Uh, _doy_. Alva. Weaponised flowers. We were just talking about it, like, thirty seconds ago, not even that."

"Oh.

"Just 'oh'?"

"Well, what do you want me to say?"

"Yeah, Dad, that's a swell idea! Get right on it! Thanks, Dad, you're the best!"

"No, that doesn't seem right."

"Drop that attitude, mister, or you're grounded."

"But you grounded me yesterday. For sneezing and making you jump."

"I spilt ink everywhere." Alastor pouted in mock sympathy. Hiccup _mmph'_ ed and, with a swish of his chieftain cloak, swept away. Alastor started after him.

"Dad. Dad! _Dad_! You big drama queen- DAD!"

"Not listening, lalalalalala!"

"I'm telling Mum!"

"You do that!"

"She'll remember this! The second her legs are better, she'll be after you!" Hiccup stopped. Alastor caught up. "I may have just saved your life."

"No. Lies. Shut your face, you little cabbage."


	57. Chapter 57

**To Guest- Thank you! I'm trying my hardest not to, but it's just been a rough time lately.**

 **To that guest- So glad you liked it! I got some really great positive feedback for that chap, I was kind of worried about it, I'm so relieved it was alright! Thank you and I'll do my best!**

* * *

"-then he told me I had big hair."

"Uh huh."

"No enthusiasm, no gratitude, just plain attitude."

"That's nice."

"You're not even listening."

"I'm sleeping. And so should you." Astrid mumbled. She was a bit out of it, regardless of sleep, as they kept her topped up on poppy milk to asure she wasn't in any discomfort. Hiccup slept dangerously close to the edge so he wouldn't kick her legs in his sleep- he was a bit of fidget- but that did often mean he woke up on the floor with Toothless drooling on him. _This won't be for much longer_ , he reminded himself, _her casts come off within a week. Then it's all a matter of building strength back up in her legs._

"Astrid."

"Mmmwhat?"

"Al will be alright, won't he? With Alva?"

"Gods willing."

"Ingrik seems to be going well."

"When you're not butting in."

"I just want to know!" She shushed him for the fifth time that night and Hiccup stewed over his thoughts. "What about Aloe?"

"She's ten. Too young."

"Older than me."

"Ugh... I will pay you to go to sleep."

"I can't."

"Take Toothless for a flight then." At the sound of his name, the Night Fury melted from the shadows and loomed over his rider. "You may not be tired, but I am."

"How are you tired? You can't do anything except sit around all day." She ignored him. Hiccup and Toothless shrugged at each other, the dragon pacing back quietly as Hiccup got up and reapplied his various layers of clothing. "Come on, bud. She's grumpy."

"Shurrup." Astrid mumbled.

"Very." Hiccup added under his breath. Toothless chortled, following his human downstairs- humans were strange creatures.

* * *

Hiccup caught up with the twins the following morning. Hackett's old house was gone already and reconstruction was underway. They eagerly showed him the plans, Eret talking to some of the builders. Hiccup had chipped in, wanting to see how far they could go with this holiday retreat idea. They had designed it from the ground-up, inside and out, working around the hills and uneven ground. "We took a few ideas from the Edge, using different levels to make more accommodation-" Ruffnut explained.

"We were looking into claiming more land though, maybe even on some islands around here. Thornston Holiday Destinations. Sounds like heaven, doesn't it, H?"

"Oh, definitely. How are you going to afford all this?"

"Notice I said _claim_ land, not _buy_. Although, Gobber won't help us make name-me rocks, so we're going to need your help on that _pleeeease_."

"You can only claim _free_ land, you know that, don't you?"

"Can we borrow your map?" Ruffnut asked. "Eret said he might know some places and wants to draw a route for us to go and look at them."

"That's all well and good, but you've got to buy building supplies, furniture- _good_ furniture- food, decent water supply, fire prevention systems-"

"All right here, my fine fellow." Ruffnut grinned, whipping out a scroll and unfurling it. Hiccup worked his way through their poor spelling, but saw that they had actually covered every expense. "We were, however, wondering if it would be at all possible to have a loan from you? Seeing as, you know, you're the Chief and, therefore, Sir Money-Bags, we were hoping that would be OK?"

"You'll have to ask Astrid on that one."

"But she won't take us seriously on this!"

"I'll put a word in." Hiccup promised and they beamed at him. "As for the bedding and curtains and that, talk to Snotlout. I'm sure he'll be happy to help."

"Uh, duh!" The twins simultaneously smacked themselves on the forehead. "Why didn't we think of that?" Tuffnut demanded of his sister. "If you won't textiles, talk to Snotlout, haven't we said that for years? He made me this jacket for our birthday, do you like?" He asked of Hiccup, spreading his arms and turning this way and that to show off. "And he made Ruffnut a new pair of boots too, but she's not wearing them today."

"I don't want to ruin them with all this work and walking around, they're _really_ nice."

"Ah, you two do care!"

"Of course they care." Eret smiled, placing an arm around each of them. "They just have a bonkers way of showing it. How's the missus?" He nodded at his brother-in-law.

"Ada? Oh, it's going great!"

"Then why are you bright red?" Hiccup quizzed, one corner of his mouth turning up. Tuffnut glared at the floor. Ruffnut looked smug. "Ruff, tell."

"He's going to ask her to marry him."

"Sssh!" The twins fell into a slap battle that was quickly yanked apart by her husband. Hiccup bounced on the spot excitedly, beaming.

"It worked! Astrid owes me pie!" He started off and then stopped, realising he still held their plans. "Mind if I borrow this? I'll talk her round for that loan. Maybe make it a wedding gift for you, Tuff."

"Will you not?"

"I'm planning your wedding."

"Oh Thor, save me now."

"Ye of little faith..." Hiccup muttered, saddling up. Toothless smiled gummily at the others and took off.

* * *

Tuffnut answered a knock on his door an hour later, dropping his head to see Aloe.

"Hello!" She waved cheerily. "Mum wants to talk to you!"

"About what?"

"Oh, she didn't tell me. But she said if you took longer than two minutes to get there, I'm allowed to kick your in the leg." Tuffnut grimaced. "If it helps, she said she isn't going to rip your head off or anything."

"That's slightly reassuring. I will need that in writing."

"You can't read."

"I can sort of read. I'm a busy guy. No time for reading. Snotty little so and so." Aloe just smiled sweetly, grabbing his hand and hauling him away. She nattered the entirity of the walk, "Dad told me about your holiday idea and I want to help! I can make it all look really pretty with flowers and I can grow trees and make vases and bouquets and flower crowns!" Then she started talking about dragons, the weather, more flowers, the new dress Grandma H was going to make for her, her siblings, Ingrid and Vadik, Alastor's not-so-secret secret crush on Alva- "Don't tell him I told you though, he goes all red and stuttery. Here we are!" Tuffnut started. That walk had seemed to take so long, but actually hadn't been. "I'm off now, I promised Hanson to a race. So going to win!"

"If I could spare the money, I'd bet on you, little miss." She gasped and then grinned at him, hugged him around the middle. Tuffnut patted her on the head. "Go win that race. Show boys who's boss."

"I will!" She promised, sprinting away. Tuffnut knocked.

"Back here!" Astrid called. "I'd greet you, but I'm immobilised!" Tuffnut let himself in, cautiously crossing the main room to the back room. Astrid sat in the middle of the bed, propped up on what seemed to be all the pillows in the house. Her legs were covered with the blanket and she was furiously failing to sew together a small shirt. "Sit." She ordered. He sat at the very end on the very edge and she frowned at him. "You big chicken. I'm not going to bite, I just want to know what your plans are."

"I don't know."

"So, you've decided to ask her but haven't thought _how_?"

"Well, how did Hiccup ask you?"

"He just said 'marry me' after I dealt with Drago."

"Just like that?"

"He likes to think he's romantic, but he's not. Well, not really. He _can_ be, don't get me wrong, but he makes such a mess." Astrid set aside her miserable attempt at sewing, narrowing her eyes at him. "What's wrong?"

"She'll say no."

"And you know that _because_?"

"Dating me is one thing. Being lawfully stuck with me for _life_?" He shook his head. "Don't think so."

"I personally think she'd be thrilled."

"Alright then, what if she stops liking me? What if my jokes and pranks are annoying, what if I make a mess around the house, what if I don't make dinner or help her with chores or shopping or dragons or-"

"Tuff, you're over-thinking this." He fumed silently, shoulders hunched. "Listen, forget those what-if's. Hiccup's jokes and pranks are annoying, he's always making a mess, he doesn't always help with dinner or chores or shopping or dragons-"

"He's the chief. He's busy."

"He's an idiot who gives himself too much work instead of delegating. You, on the other hand, are just an idiot who needs to have a little more faith in himself."

"What if she does say no though?"

"Well, without getting mad or upset, ask her why. Maybe she feels that she might not be ready and that's not saying she may never be ready, but to give her some time. Respect her wishes, Tuff, she's not had it easy."

"I know." He said quietly. "She told me."

"She trusts you. If she's told you, that means she trusts you. She knows you're not going to hurt her. Don't look so down in the dumps, Tuff, it's a good thing! Here, I know what you can do. Give me a pencil and some paper, I need to write to my mother."

"About what?"

"You'll see."

"I thought Hiccup was the matchmaker?"

"And who do you think helps him when he's stumped?"

"Oh."

"Pencil. Paper. In my hand. Right now, five seconds ago right now."

"You're very impatient."

"I'd do it myself, but- as I said- I'm immobilised. But that doesn't mean I can't and won't kick your arse if you don't shift it."


	58. Chapter 58

**To that guest- Hiccup-Ingrid, father-daughter time coming right up! And they do talk. Like, behind the scenes. Sort of. Basically I'm lazy. And forgetful ^_^ But thank you! I just really love the idea of Ruff and Tuff doing something so outlandish for their time, but it would totally catch on in today's world.**

 **To Guest- Aahhh, bless your wee cottons, thank you!**

 **To all, I've been sick the past couple of days, so apologies for not updating. If I had done, you'd have literally gotten a chapter of rzxdfgchjkoiuyjthrgefdwasZdrty8uio0ikjfdrseqsawdefruih98, seriously, it felt like someone was squeezing my insides from top to toe. But I'm better now! I've missed chocolate so much :')**

* * *

"Tuff's going to ask Ada to marry him?"

"Yes."

"And I'm not allowed to tell Vad?"

"No."

" _Why_?" Hiccup started to speak, but Ingrid continued. "You know, this is the _one_ piece of gossip I can tell him that he has _no idea about_ and you want me to keep it _secret_?"

"Pretty much."

"You're such a buzzkill."

"If the wind changes, your face will stay like that."

"How many times did the wind change for you then?"

"I don't even know why I bother with you. You're just _mean_." Hiccup wrinkled his nose at his eldest. Ingrid stuck her tongue out. "Besides, I thought I'd give you the heads-up- because I'm _nice_ \- as Vad will probably freak." Ingrid raised a brow. "You saw how he was when he figured out they were dating. Plus, having Tuffnut as a stepdad might not be the first thing on his wishlist."

"At least Tuff's not a buzzkill."

"I'm going off you."

"It's alright, Dad!" Aloe pitched in, appearing from under the table. "You wait until it's her wedding day!" She giggled. "Tuff's going to be her stepdad-in-law. Wait, what does that make him to the rest of us then?"

"A pain."

"I resent that comment."

" _Where the hell are you all coming from_?" Hiccup exclaimed frantically, arms flailing. "You shush." He pointed warningly at Ingrid the second she started mimicking him. "Tuff, what are you doing? What did we agree?"

"I chickened."

"Why do people use chicken as a term for running off? Chickens are evil." Aloe pouted. "They bite."

"They _peck._ " Ingrid corrected. "They don't have teeth. And what did you agree anyway?"

"I said _you shush_. Aloe, do me a favour." His youngest brightened. "I'm too tired to kick him all the way back, would you mind?" Tuffnut had a few choice things to say about this, Aloe stubbornly ushering him out the door with kicks to the shins and endless chatter. Hiccup sank into his chair with a long, defeated sigh. "I can't wait until I retire. Get some proper sleep." He mused dreamily.

"You're just getting old."

"I'm nine!"

"Aah, nap time!"

"What part of 'you shush' did you not understand?" Ingrid hunched her shoulders. Hiccup grimaced at her, rubbing at his arms. Toothless nudged the door open, making his way in. He looked as energetic as his rider did, slumping on the floor beside him. He was asleep within minutes.

"Why are you both so tired?"

"We've been helping the twins with their holiday resort."

"They're actually serious about that?"

"If you stopped making goo-goo eyes at Vad for more than five seconds, I'm sure you'd have noticed."

"I don't make _goo-goo eyes_ at him! And that's such a weird phrase anyway, how do you even know stuff like that?" Hiccup shrugged, dozing. "Dad."

"Wake me in... five years..."

"Dad."

"Mm?" He hummed, but she could tell he had stopped paying attention. Setting her jaw stubbornly, Ingrid reclined in her seat, propping her feet on the table. He opened an eye at that. "Off." She simply wiggled lower in her chair, emphasising her new-found source of comfort. "Horrible little madam."

"If you're just going to call me names, I won't tell you about my brilliant idea."

"If it involves sleeping, I'm all ears."

"Not outright." He tipped his head up, squinting at her. "Mum's going to have her legs back soon, right?" A small nod, a miracle he could keep his head up. "I was thinking, she needs to get the strength back in them, so why don't you take her away for the weekend somewhere, maybe the Edge or something. She can do all the running around that she likes and you can sleep."

"Aaah, sleep. Glorious, precious sleep..."

"And while you're away, I can be in charge, right?"

"Yes."

"And not Al?"

"Not if he doesn't want to be."

"So, if he doesn't, which he probably won't, I'll be running the _whole_ village myself?"

"Sounds about right."

"Awesome." Ingrid sat up, dropping her feet to the floor. Hiccup smiled at her, weariness tugging at the corners of his mouth. Ingrid fetched a pillow and blanket and he was soon nestled in his chair, sound asleep. Toothless started to snore softly, tail swishing distractedly. Ingrid hopped around him to check on her mother. "Dad said I could."

"I told you he would."

"But you're going to be stuck with him for a whole weekend."

"I've been stuck with him for twenty years, I think I can manage."

"How are your legs?"

"Itchy. I can't wait to get them back though." Astrid smiled. "I really need to kick his dumb ass off a cliff."

"Well, that's just mean."

"Now you know where you get it from."

"Heard then?"

"I hear everything. It's a mother thing, enhanced hearing. I never knew what my mum had meant until I had you. Plus, you have to be very aware with that lunatic running around." She nodded towards the door, just able to see her husband dozing at the table. "Where are the other two?"

"Al's probably stuttering at Alva and Aloe is making sure Tuff doesn't chicken out again."

"She makes a valid point though. Chickens are ruthless little buggers when they want to be." Astrid patted the bed beside her and Ingrid bundled under the covers next to her. "Don't tease your brother about his stammer, he can't help it. And it's not as bad as it was." Ingrid nodded. Astrid eyed her sidelong. "Just because you're too cold-hearted to get all tongue-tied around someone."

"Um, _says you_."

"Your dad couldn't speak for the both of us. Or if he did, it was just incessant babble, but that pretty much sums him up." There was a crash from the other room. Ingrid turned her head. Sneezy and Bob were chasing each other around the main room, the other Terrors watching from the rafters and squawking, egging them on. Hiccup woke up first, Toothless growling and putting his claws over his ears. Hiccup forced himself up, retrieving a particularly shiny bit of metal from the shelf and shooing them all out with the mysterious spot of light. "Hiccup!"

"It hasn't been five years..." He complained, rubbing at his eyes. "Astrid, she's on my side of the bed. Ugh..."

"Stop whining. Ingrid, shift over."

"No."

"Cow." Hiccup muttered, kneeling beside the bed instead and resting his head on the covers. "Astrid, she's being mean to me."

"I bet it's because she doesn't want us asking her about Vad. Isn't that right, _Ingrid_?" Astrid smirked knowingly. Ingrid glowered. Hiccup sat a little straighter, tucking his arms under his chin. "Aloe said she's planning your wedding."

"There might not even be a wedding."

"Oh, there's going to be one."

"Not yet though." Hiccup said quickly. "You're only fifteen. You can get married when you're thirty."

"Hiccup!"

"What? Why are you yelling at me? I don't get it. I just want to sleep." He smooshed his face in the bedding, reappearing seconds later to breathe. "Anyway," he continued, "I don't think I'm ready for grandkids in the next ten years." Ingrid felt heat rising to her cheeks, mad at the pair of them.

"Who said you were getting grandkids?"

"Mum and Dad say grandkids are a god's end. All the joy of having children without any of the responsibility. Or at least, not as much responsibility." Hiccup paused, thinking. "I would be the world's youngest grandfather."

"Oh, don't start that again."

"You're not getting grandkids."

"Eh. We'll pick on Al then."

"Not _pick on_." Astrid prompted. Hiccup narrowed his eyes at her. "It's a simple means of encouragement, you don't have to be so blunt about it."

"You're the blonde one." He frowned. "I meant to say blunt. I don't know why I said blonde. We all know you're blonde. I really need to sleep."

"Yes. Yes you do."

"Too bad." Ingrid smirked. "I've decided I'm _really_ comfortable and I'm not moving."

"And I've decided to disown you."

"Hiccup!"

" _Stop_ yelling at me, I did nothing _wrong_. Women are mean. Blonde, blunt, mean, whatever. Need sleeps."


	59. Chapter 59

**To Guest- thank you! ^_^ I've got quite a few requests for more parent-child moments, so yay! :D**

 **To that guest- I was very sleepy, yes, I just wanted to go to sleep, I was so in tune with Hiccup writing that, I swear to gods :P I'm a bit better now, thank you! ^_^ So, I'm back, and I shall be updating as much as possible!**

 **To all, if you read my PJO ones, I've got a new one called** _ **Reunited**_ **, the** _ **official**_ **story of how Percy and Louisa met.**

 **Now, for CerebralCortex31, because the idea amused me :P**

* * *

"Ta da!" Hiccup beamed. "Your legs are free!"

"Oh thank Thor." Astrid immediately started itching at her legs. Hiccup chuckled, throwing aside the bindings and picking up the bucket of warm, soapy water. Astrid still had to exercise her legs, but his mother had said a simple wipe down should keep her from feeling icky. "I can do it." She insisted, taking the cloth from him and cleaning her legs. She wiggled her toes and grinned. "We need to get out of this house, get me out. Where's Stormfly?"

"She's, uh, giving Spike a bit of a telling off."

"Why?"

"He ate her chicken." Astrid gasped. "I know!" Hiccup laughed. "Al's face, it was priceless. Stormfly told him off too." Hiccup absent-mindedly started massaging circles into her feet, slowly and gradually working up to her calves. Astrid hummed appreciatively. "Your mum said to just take you for a walk about the village, nothing to extravagant. But we're going away this weekend, so you can run around to your heart's content!"

"I suppose so."

"I'll even run away, if that makes you more inclined."

"Do I get my axe?" Hiccup hesitated, hands freezing. Astrid nudged him with her foot and he resumed his practically magical massage. "Or at least a knife?"

"I think we can manage a knife. I've been withdrawn from the crazy wife trying to kill me thing for a while, so... you may need to wean me. Sort of. Does that make sense?"

"For you, yeah."

"Oh, OK." He stood and fetched her fresh clothes and her boots. She dressed herself, tried to get up as soon as she was done and toppled forward against his chest. "Yeah, the mothers told me your legs would be a bit wobbly. Good job you've got this handsome strong Viking to lean on."

"Where?" Astrid asked, looking everywhere but him, leaning this way and that.

"Oh, you're cruel." He hissed. Astrid smiled sweetly, gifting him with a quick peck on the lips. His hand tentatively touched her stomach, giving the bump a small poke. "Hurry up." He told it for the millionth time, excitement filtering the green of his eyes, as it always did and always had done at the prospect of another child. "Milady," he addressed with a cheeky, flirty smile, "Berk awaits. Or at least it would if you hadn't so heartlessly upset handsome strong Viking."

"Awww, poor _baby_. Is there anything I can do?" She cooed, tracing a finger along his jawline.

"A proper kiss might make him feel better."

"Well, he'll only get one _after_ our walk."

"Oooh, double cruel!"

* * *

Hiccup and Toothless had escaped- uh, _taken a break_ , from chiefing, calling an early lunch. He felt entitled to do so, it was his last day before he and Astrid ran away- no, no- _took a break_ for the weekend. Not-so-silent Silent Sven had returned full force after a week suffering with flu, screeching about ruffians and hooligans rampaging his flock, taking advantage of his ill spell. Toothless whined, a particular whine Hiccup had gotten used to over the years to mean _cove_. Hiccup figured both of them were sick of Sven's shrieking and- hold on a cotton-picking minute, _what the hell_?

Ingrid and Vadik, too close, too kissing, too against a tree, too hands, too wrapped around each other, too _no!_

Hiccup's hands shot up to cover his eyes with a distressed yell. Toothless took this as an order, a plasma blast sending the pair running for cover. Hiccup blindly adjusted the tail and they were on their way back to Berk in a second. "My eyes, my eyes, my eyes!" The dragon crooned, ears laying flat.

* * *

At first, Astrid was amused at her husband's upset and then annoyed. Ingrid didn't arrive home for another hour. Vadik was nowhere to be seen. Hiccup sat at the table, elbows on the surface and hands arched over his eyes, point blank refusing to look at his daughter, turning his head and covering his eyes when she tried moving into his line of vision. Astrid had no such trouble with this, arms folded, back straightened. Ingrid fumed.

"Like you and Dad are so innocent." She retorted, gesturing at Astrid's small bump.

"We're _older_."

"Technically-"

"No, don't bring up his _technical_ age _,_ that doesn't count." Ingrid rolled her eyes. Pink splodges formed on Astrid's cheekbones, brow furrowing angrily. Hiccup kept his head down, hand guards still up. From Ingrid could see of his face, he was very Awkwarded out. "Ingrid, you know the rules and it's more important that you in particular abide by them, future chief of Berk and all." Ingrid just nodded, focus glassing over as she sensed the parental lecture raining down upon her. Astrid turned a sharper shade of red and smacked her fist on the table, startling her husband. Ingrid frowned at her. Astrid glanced at her husband sidelong, patting his shoulder. Hiccup took his leave, eyes still hidden.

"Yes, very mature!" Ingrid called after him. "He had Toothless blast at us!"

"For damn good reason!" Astrid shot back instantly. Ingrid tipped her chin up defiantly.

"It's not like we were well and truly going at it or anything! Dad's just blown this all out of proportion, like he usually does! And you're over-reacting, as equally expected!" The crimson worked its way over the rest of Astrid's face and Ingrid realised she was now dangerously on the line, verging on tipping over. "I can make my own decisions." She said stubbornly, folding her arms sharply.

"Yes, yes you can, but you're going to have to start learning how those decisions can impact your future!"

"It's just Vadik!"

"And where is _just Vadik_?"

"He went home! What did you think he was going to do, swan in and boast about it? _Hey Mr and Mrs. H, I snogged your daughter_! _Jolly good_!"

"It wasn't just that though, was it?" Astrid demanded.

"I know the rules! It's not going to go any further, by Thor, this is _ridiculous_." Ingrid flicked her hair from her eyes and glared round furiously at the main room. Hiccup had closed the door to the back room. Her temper doubled. "Why aren't you getting _him_ out here? He and Toothless could have killed us!"

"Oh _please_." Astrid scoffed. "It was only a warning shot." Ingrid started to argue back. Astrid gained a malicious smirk. "Now who's over-reacting?" Her daughter raged silently. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I need to have a word with young mister Vadik." Astrid kicked up her axe from against the wall and marched out, Ingrid hurrying after her, protesting all the way. "Oh, Ingrid, you're blowing this all out of proportion, by Thor, this is _ridiculous_."

"Mum!" Ingrid jumped in front of her, unslinging her own axe. Astrid raised a brow at this, corner of her mouth tipping up bemusedly. "Leave Vad alone." Ingrid said firmly.

"Aaah, the chief voice doesn't work on me. Ask your father."

"I would, but he's shut himself away."

"For good reason."

"Not for good reason! I don't have to live up to _all_ expectations, I make my own choices! I'm not a kid anymore!"

"That's the thing. You're a woman now, a young one, but one all the same. Your dad just didn't, doesn't want to accept it, it's all gone too fast for him. You two making out in the woods like that has only just knocked him for six. Ah, don't like it when I say that, do you?" Astrid smirked. Ingrid had gone a very bright red, gripping tightening uncomfortably on her axe. "Now, move. I don't care if you're set to be the future chief of the whole Archipelago, I am your _mother_ and you do as _I_ say when _I_ say so, is that clear?"

"Leave Vad alone."

"I just want to talk to him."

"Then leave the axe."

"It's part of my talk. You're not going to stop me, Ingrid, you should know that by now." Astrid strolled casually past her, dropping the butt of her axe on Ingrid's foot and confiscating her daughter's in one fluid movement. Ingrid hopped about and cursed. Astrid stuck her foot out and Ingrid sprawled. "The first one was for upsetting your father, the second for your language. I didn't teach you that."

"I picked it up." Ingrid grumbled.

"I'm going to talk to Vadik. Considering it goes well, you shall have your boyfriend back in one piece tomorrow morning and you may find he's a bit wary of this _making out_ business. Toodles." Astrid grinned and bounced away. She was still wobbly on her legs, but her infamous stubborn streak lived on. Ingrid, finally giving in to this, found her feet and trudged home. Hiccup had ventured out, thinking it was safe, instantly looking at the ceiling when she kicked the door open.

"Mature." Ingrid snorted. He shook his head. "Dad. I can't exactly go back and un-do it."

"What's going on?"

"Aloe, stay out of it."

"Why's Dad looking at the ceiling?"

"He's being childish."

"Dad?" Aloe tugged on her father's hand. "Dad, did Ingrid do something wrong?"

"Yes. No. Yes. I don't know. I don't like it."

"What did she do?"

"No. You're ten. No."

"Dad, I'm sure we can talk this over. Like _adults_."

"I don't want to. I'm going out."

"Dad!"

"No, I'm gone. See? Me. Gone. Poof." The door swung shut. Aloe giggled.

"What did you _do_?"

"I think you've broken Dad." Alastor said from the stairs, sitting mid-way up with a cheeky grin. "What did you do?"

"Nothing!"

"Liar."

"Dad says I can't know, I'm ten."

"Ingrid!"

"It wasn't like that!"

"Aaah, Mum went after Vad!" Alastor snickered. "I'll miss him."


	60. Chapter 60

**To Guest- Next chapter for sure! I need to make sure Vadik's OK! :P**

 **To all, go and read 'This Changes Everything' by JHawkins GO RIGHT NOW, READ IT!**

* * *

"Tuff, stop dollying, just do it." Tuffnut stuck his bottom lip out, rubbing anxiously at his arms. "Go. Now. Just blurt it if you can't do the whole presentation." Astrid grabbed him by the shoulder and forcefully spun him round. "Talk to Hiccup. He'll get you to do it. I'd help you, but I need to talk to Vad. He upstairs?"

"Yeah."

"You big jessie, go!" Astrid laughed, shoving her friend out. She propped her axe up on her shoulder and shook her head. "Vadik!" She called. "If you jump out the window, I'll find you! There is no getting out of it." Astrid hopped up the stairs on light feet, relishing in the use of her legs. Oh, she had missed this, missed running around and keeping people- Hiccup- on their toes. Vadik had been indeed trying to escape out the window, the head of his Typhoomarang peering through. "Sit." Astrid ordered, flourishing an arm to the bed. Vadik meekly went and sat down. "You thought you were going to get Hiccup, didn't you?"

"Sort of." He mumbled. "Toothless did fire at us."

"Yeah, well, Hiccup's gone into hiding." Vadik pressed his lips together, hands trapped between his knees. "So you've got me instead. Firstly, I'd love to be able to capture the look on your face right now and hang it on my wall. Secondly, _what the hell_?" He murmured incoherently, but Astrid wasn't listening and didn't hear him. She started off with the rules and lecture she had given Ingrid, "you do realise what her future holds, right?" Vadik nodded mutely. "I'm all for... uh, Vadrig or Ingrik or whatever Hiccup called you two, I don't know. But you two are still a few years off marriage and all the extra stuff, if it's even going that way. Don't get me wrong, Vad, you're great, but if I get even a whiff of you treating Ingrid wrong, even in the _slightest,_ you will not see her for dust and she won't see you until your funeral ship, is that clear?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Good. Now, best behaviour, _especially_ around Hiccup, he's freaking out. Ingrid's grown up too fast for him, he doesn't like it, no matter how much he supports you two."

"I'm sorry."

"Tell Hiccup that."

"He'll kill me."

"No, he'll let me do that if need be." Vadik paled and his head dropped. "Don't test me, Vadik. Consider this a warning." He nodded again. Astrid slid her axe into its holster across her back and took the saddle from the table. Vadik opened his mouth and she looked at him challengingly. He shut up. "You're grounded for a fortnight. Got a problem with that, take it up with my axe." He stood quietly, wringing his hands. His dragon followed Astrid curiously as she stalked off down the hill with his saddle.

"Psst!" Vadik startled and looked round. Alastor and Spike were hovering just outside the window. "Ah, mate, you're in _so_ much trouble."

"Shut up, Al."

"Aaah, you've gone just as red as Ingrid! Oh, I love this! Mum's right, I wish there was some way to immortalise that look on your face!" Spike landed in Vadik's room, sniffing about curiously. Alastor dismounted. "Now, because you're grounded, I'm here to take whatever sharp, stabby things you have. Dad's orders. You're not training with Ingrid for two weeks either. And you suddenly have a very extensive to-do list!" Alastor flicked a scroll from his pocket, unrolling it with a flourish. It flooded to the floor and rolled against Vadik's toes. "Sooner you're done, sooner Dad will stop freaking and possibly start forgiving you."

"Al, I'm going to kill you."

"Hey. I'm just the messenger. Leave me it out of it. Come on, Spike. His head looks ready to melt."


	61. Chapter 61

**OK, I know I said Alastor and Astrid bonding chapter in this one, but I need to do one or two more things before I can do that chapter because I've completely forgotten how pregnant Astrid is, so... BUT YOU WILL GET THAT CHAPTER. I HAVE IT ALL PLANNED.**

* * *

By day three, Vadik felt that he had aged thirty years. He was up at the crack of dawn, thanks to Alastor and Spike dancing along the roof and awake until the very, _very_ late hours of the night. Ingrid, from what he had heard, wasn't faring much better, but he wasn't allowed to see her and, even if he was, he wouldn't be able to, not with all the work Hiccup had given them. Hiccup was doing everything in his power to keep them apart, but that didn't stop him from watching from afar. More than once an hour, Vadik spotted a familiar Night Fury perched on a rooftop, in a tree or beating his wings to remain stationary, rider in saddle and watching everything. Vadik tried waving to Hiccup once, nearly lost his head from a series of Nadder spines from Alastor. "Back to work, Vad!" Alastor cackled, waggling his fingers cheekily.

Ada, at first, sympathised with her son, but then got the whole story from Astrid. She and Tuffnut watched too, _you missed a spot_ , etc. Vadik was cleaning stalls, fields, ships, workshops, forges, armoury, more dragon pens, he herded sheep, foraged, joined the fishing crews, ran errands for Gobber, gathered fire wood, helped with the livestock, brought in injured dragons, set traps for the butcher to replenish his stock, helped chase a wild Scauldron from Berk's waters and there was plenty more for him to do, there was always more for him to do, Hiccup and the riders made sure of that. Gods knew what was left for Ingrid to do. _This is going to be a long two weeks_ , Vadik mentally sighed, rubbing tiresomely at his eyes as he trudged home for lunch.

Ingrid didn't have as much work, but she was undergoing a very strict, very disciplinary chiefing course, Stoick a rather unforgiving and stern teacher. If it wasn't for Valka, Ingrid would have died of boredom, starvation and sleep deprivation three hours in. It was possible, shush. Despite Valka's kindness, she had the job of teaching Ingrid household skills too, sewing and cooking and cleaning, tried teaching her the proper manners befit a lady and a chief. It was hard-going, considering the long line of stubbornness flowing through her granddaughter's veins, but when Ingrid gritted her teeth and smiled obligingly at Sven rather than rant at him, she knew they were getting somewhere after all.

"Hiccup, you could talk to her." Astrid pointed out the fifth day.

"No."

"Why?"

"No."

"Ugh." Astrid rolled her eyes. Aloe popped up from under the table, the latest flower crown perched lopsidedly on her head. She beamed at them, sliding a basket of bread across the surface. "Where did you get this?"

"Hanson. He told me I needed fattening up."

"But we've tried that. Aloe, you eat like a Thornston and not gain an ounce."

"It's all that charging about she does." Hiccup put in, helping himself to a roll. Toothless came sniffing for food, accepting half of Hiccup's. The Terrors landed one after the other, snatching up what they could scavenge and rushing away again. Astrid sighed, tipping the basket towards her. She gave Aloe one, whistling for Stormfly. "Ooh, this are really nice. Tell Hanson he's now my personal chef."

"He's ten, Hiccup."

"Yeah, and I'm nine and I'm the _chief_."

"I'm not having this argument with you."

"Ooh, grouchy."

"Dad, sssh! She'll kill you."

"Nah, she loves me too much. Don't pull that face!" Hiccup reprimanded around his mouthful, jabbing a warning finger at his daughter. Aloe stopped giving him such a dubious, sarcastic look and smiled sweetly. "Do _not_ turn into your mother, my heart can't take it." Astrid gave her youngest a sly, approving smile and thumbs up, feeding her Nadder baked goods.

Hiccup finished his mouthful and wiped his hands clean on his tunic. "Well," He said, rising, "I'm off."

"Tuffnut?" Aloe asked.

"Yup."

"Give him this!" She whipped the flower crown off her head, skipping round the table to present it to him. "Say it's for luck!"

"Why, if he's wearing this, how could Ada say no?"

"Don't sarcasm me, Dad."

"I wouldn't dream of it." Hiccup smiled, messing her hair. He kissed Astrid's cheek as he passed, trying the flower crown on for himself as the door shut behind him and Toothless. "What'd you think, bud?" He grinned, posing. Toothless wrinkled his nose and snorted. "Rude." Hiccup muttered, stalking off down the hill. He could see Vadik running around the outskirts of the village, scroll in hand. He disappeared into a hut, emerging minutes later, just as Hiccup was passing, with arms full of wicker baskets. He stopped short upon seeing the chief, flushed crimson and put his head down. Hiccup carried on walking. Toothless stuck his tongue out at the younger human and, head held high, continued after his rider.

Tuffnut wasn't at home. Ada was, though; "I think he went to see Ruffnut. I could be wrong, I didn't really hear what he said as he was running out the door. Hiccup?"

"Mm?"

"He seems really fidgety lately, more than usual. Do you know if he's alright?"

"It's Tuffnut. He's probably seen some big monster by the woods and no-one believes him." Ada smiled weakly, tucking her hair behind her ear. "Has he said anything?"

"He said he was working on something. I thought it was those holiday homes at first, all that work making him a bit absent-minded, making him a bit too busy to hang around... but I'm getting the feeling there's something else. Has he said anything to you?"

"Ada, if I thought Tuff was messing you around, you'd be the... third to know." She raised a brow at him. "Well, me first, obviously. Astrid second, she'd be after him like a Night Fury after Altantic Cod- no, I don't have any, shut up." Toothless growled and curled up by the door, sulking. "And then you, third. It's a plan, I've got it all worked out."

"Does Astrid know yet?"

"He's not doing anything wrong."

"Promise?"

"Promise." Hiccup smiled, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "I wouldn't worry, you know how he gets sometimes. And he'll be especially distracted now that one of his and Ruff's plans is _actually_ working." Ada nodded to the side slightly in agreement. Hiccup smirked. He _so_ wanted to tell what Tuffnut was really planning, but _Tuffnut had to do it._ Either way, he was dying for her to know, _dying_. "Speaking of, I've got to talk to the clown. I'll see you around."

"Yeah. Thank you."

"For what?"

"Just reminding me what an idiot I'm dating."

"I'll write it on your forehead next time." Hiccup nudged Toothless up with his foot, waving as they went out the door. He mounted and took to the skies. Stoick was sparring with Ingrid outside his house, Vadik was hauling a cart of weapons around for Gobber, both teens utterly exhausted. "Serves them right." Hiccup told himself. He looked east, seeing the twins, Eret and their crew working away. He steered Toothless in that direction, landing beside Snotlout and Hookfang. The two dragons snapped at each other playfully, bouncing and chasing each other. Hiccup elbowed Snotlout in greeting. "How's it going?"

"I've never seen Tuff work so much. He really is terrified of asking Ada, ain't he?"

"Undoubtedly. She thinks he's messing."

"No!"

"Yeah."

"Go and do your Hiccup thing!" Snotlout ordered. His twin boys were part of the construction team. Alastor was with Ruffnut and Eret, helping sketch the plans and work out what they needed. He waved at his father, grinning broadly. Aloe was running around, providing drinks and flower crowns, waving too and nearly dropping the tray of mugs. Astrid stood to one side with Waiola, whispering, giggling, snickering, gossiping. She made a face at Hiccup, pointing demandingly at Tuffnut. Snotlout shoved him forward and Hiccup nearly face-planted a stack of lumber.

"Hey, Hiccup." Tuffnut muttered, frowning at the plans. Hiccup snatched them from him and rolled them up. Tuffnut frowned at him. "What?"

"You know what."

"I can't."

"Yes, you can."

"No, I cannot."

"Why?"

"She'll say no."

"Of course she will." Tuffnut gaped at him. "I mean, why would she want to marry you? You're annoying, you don't wash properly, you haven't brushed your hair since you were born, it's a miracle you even had it cut ocassionally, you're not exactly good father-material for Vadik, you're future business is doomed to fail. You're right, Tuff, she won't want to marry you."

"I'm going to ask her."

"And why's that?"

"Because she will marry me if it kills me." Tuffnut spun on his heel and stomped off. Ruffnut sidled up, making Hiccup jump.

"Reverse psychology. Sneaky, H, very sneaky."

"It worked, didn't it?" He signalled to the others and they all followed on their dragons. Tuffnut found Ada in the market square, marching right up to her. He grabbed her by the arm and spun her round, dropping to his knees and flinging his arms out.

"Marry me!" His voice carried and everyone stopped what they were doing to turn and stare. Ada blinked at him a few times, mouth agape. Tuffnut shuffled forward on his knees and hugged her legs. "I would give anything to spend the rest of my life with you, Ada, marry me and I will make you the happiest woman to ever walk this earth, I promise! I'll promise you sea, sun and sky if you say you'll be Mrs. Ada Thornston!"

"OK." Hiccup led the cheer and a round of applause broke out through village and sky. Ada pulled a very surprised Tuffnut to his feet and kissed him, bursting into tears and hugging the life from him. Tuffnut could see Hiccup from over her shoulder, frowning up at him. Hiccup saluted cheekily.

"I'm planning your wedding!" Aloe called from the back of her mother's dragon. Astrid, sat before her, planted a hand on her hip and shook her head, glaring over at her husband- _your daughter_ , her eyes told him, _soooooo your daughter._


	62. Chapter 62

**To Guest- Thank you! ^_^**

 **To that guest- Mama Bear Astrid! I love it! :') That just reminds me of this poem my younger brother wrote for my mum, one of the lines was like 'And if someone was to upset me, I know my mum would turn into a grizzly bear and sort them out', mother bears! ^_^**

* * *

"I now pronounce you husband and wife!" Hiccup beamed, throwing a handful of petals over the new couple. He had postponed his weekend trip with Astrid to throw the Tuffada wedding ASAP- and to make sure Ingrid didn't, it was the sort of thing she would do considering the mood she was in. Astrid didn't mind, she was as ecstatic as her husband. Aloe had made _everyone_ flower crowns for the occasion and made a few bob doing so. Her creations were flung into the air in celebration as the happy couple shared a tender kiss. Hiccup shared a high five with his wife. Ruffnut barrelled into her brother and Ada, initiating happy bouncing, dragging Eret into the huddle.

"Go!" She ordered seconds later. "Go, go, go!" She chased them out, setting them off for their honeymoon. "I honestly cannot believe that just happened- my brother just got _married_."

"You know, he was just as surprised when you got married."

"Oh, very funny, Hiccup." Ruffnut flicked her hair from her eyes, planting her hands on her hips. "Put it this way- if and when Vadik and Ingrid get married, you'll be related to us by law." Hiccup's smile faded as he thought this over. Tuffnut was now Vadik's stepdad, he would become Ingrid's stepdad-in-law should she marry Vadik, Ruffnut would be her stepaunt-in-law... Ruffnut cackled at the look of horror slowly working its way over the chief's face. He had _not_ thought this through. Astrid seemed to be coming to the same realisation, the Hoffersons dragged into this Thornston mess.

"Sweet Thor. Hiccup, can we take that trip now?"

"I think we're going to need it."

"Agreed." They whistled for their dragons, Hiccup put Ingrid in charge, and they were gone. Ingrid frowned after them, waiting until they were distant specks in the sky before turning. Vadik stood behind her, offering a rose and a sheepish smile. Stoick appeared, mighty arms folded. Ingrid took the flower and Vadik melted back into the crowds. Ingrid looked up at her grandfather, protest on her lips. He raised a hand and she fell silent.

"I don't care if you're acting chief, there's no changing Hiccup's rules."

"You're such a butt."

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that." He passed her a scroll. "I'd love to stay for the celebrations too, but this work will never get done. Come on."

"Alastor!" Ingrid called. Her brother looked up from the buffet table, flower crown lopsided on his blond head. "Keep things under control here!"

"Uh... yeah, sure. No problem. Um..." He grinned and Ingrid left with Stoick. His grin vanished in a second. Aloe popped up at his elbow. "I _hate_ being in charge of _anything_ , dammit."

"It's not that bad. Tuffnut and Ada have left the island now. People are leaving, they're going back to work or, if you're a Thornston, to party somewhere else. Let's eat the free food and hide."

"Good idea."

"I'm full of them."

"You're also full of it." Alastor shook his head. Aloe flashed an angelic smile, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. Alastor swiped her bread roll and ran for it. Aloe raced after him. Some of her friends, Hanson included, thought they were racing and joined in. Alastor mistook this for a bunch of ten years old ganging up on him and whistled for Spike. He stuffed the bread in his mouth and swung up into the saddle, taking to the skies, their protests dying in the rush of wind.

He tore the bread in half, throwing a bit as far as he could. Spike squawked happily and dived after it. Alastor all but inhaled the rest, mentally high fiving himself. Aloe would get her own back, no doubts about it, but for now, he had food.

He didn't realise he had company until something smacked against his shoulder and a cold, stickiness flooded his shirt. His head whipped round, hand shooting up behind him to come away bright green. "Alva." He said around his mouthful, twisting at the waist as she flew closer on Trips. The two Nadders chirped greetings at each other. Alastor simply waved. "You don't have to throw things at me."

"What, why? I thought it was our signature move?"

"Si-signature move?"

"Yeah. I throw things, you make a great target. That's how it works right?"

"Unless you throw sharp things." Alastor mumbled, not sure if she heard him. "What... what are you doing up here a-anyway?" Alva simply shrugged, bouncing another paint bomb in her hand. Trips dipped and skimmed over clouds, veering towards Spike to engage in a game of Tag.

"You don't have to chief now your dad's away, do you?"

"N-no. Ingrid's... Ingrid's ac-acting chief."

"Oh. Good. Fancy a race?"

"A r-race?"

"Yes. It's where we go super fast, try to out-fly our opponent and reach a designated finish line first."

"I know what a race is." Alastor muttered, turning red. Alva grinned cheekily at him. "Usual course?" He offered. "Winner gets, um... gets-"

"Winner gets a favour of their choosing from the loser." Alastor blinked at her. "My usual stakes or, at least, in unofficial races. Be prepared to lose _, sucker_!" She urged Trips into a steep dive. Alastor and Spike stared after them.

"I don't want to lose. She's scary, she's going to ask a scary favour. Spike, please don't make us lose, I don't think I'll live to see next week if we lose." Spike snorted and dived after them.

They lost. Alastor was going to die, Alva was going to kill him.

"Let's see..." Alva said with a cheeky smile, tapping her fingers on her chin thoughtfully. Alastor recognised that look; Aloe made that face all the time, she knew _exactly_ what she wanted and was just messing with him. "You're favour to me is going to be... a date." Alastor's eyes widened, his face felt so hot, his brain must have melted. Alva smiled sweetly, bouncing on the balls of her feet. "I'm going to be straight with you, we're Hiccstrid Version Two and _you_ get to take the ever amazing _me_ on a _date_. Let's say, lunch in the forest tomorrow?"

"Uh, well, um... I- d-d- _date_? Wi-with y-y-you?"

"Yes. I'm pretty sure I've already said that. I could cook dinner on your face, my gods. If it makes you feel better, my definition of a _date_ is total and complete _war_ against you. But I still want food, so you bring that. And your sword. You are my new sparring partner."

"W-what happened t-t-to y-your o-old one?"

"Now, if I told you that, you'll be in trouble too. Stop stuttering, I'm not going to kill you." She turned away, heading back towards Trips. "Not unless I absolutely have to."

"I feel so reassured."

* * *

 **OK, this is a filler, I shall do a time-skip in the next chapter, gonna be good! ^_^**


	63. Chapter 63

**OK, I know I said I was going to time-skip after that last chapter, but I wanted to do the Alvastor 'date'. Sooooo...**

* * *

"Why are you hiding up here?" Aloe asked. Alastor was hiding in his reading corner, but not actually reading for a change. He was sitting up with his knees drawn to his chest and arms around them, looking mortified. "Are you alright?" Aloe couldn't help but giggle a little at the look on his face, pressing her lips together when his gaze cut to her, a little irritated.

"I could use some help rather than mockery."

"Ooh, what happened?" Aloe wiggled in beside him. Her brother didn't say anything, bowing his head and hiding his face. Aloe called for their sister, startling him. He shushed her desperately, too little too late. Ingrid appeared at the top of the stairs, axe in hand. "Ingrid, Al needs help. And not mockery."

"That's still mockery."

"Why? What did you do?"

"I... lost."

"What?" Ingrid lowered her weapon, confused. "Lost what?" Aloe waved her over and she sat on Alastor's other side. "Bro, we can't help you if we don't know what's wrong."

"Nothing's wrong."

"Then... _what_?" Ingrid puzzled. Aloe looked as bewildered as she felt. Alastor groaned, rubbing at his face irritably. "What _happened_?"

"Alva."

"Yes, because that's a perfectly acceptable explanation."

"You're not helping."

"How'd you expect me to when I can't read minds?"

"Ingrid, stop sassing him." Aloe advised, casting a sympathetic look at her brother. Alastor licked his lips nervously, chewing at his thumbnail. "What did Alva do?"

"She challenged me to a race."

"Yeah..." Ingrid prompted when he fell silent again.

"I lost."

"Yeah..."

"And the deal was the loser would have to do the winner a favour."

"Yeah..."

"That's really annoying."

"Yeah..." Ingrid smiled cheekily. Alastor huffed. "Alright, alright, I'll stop. So, what's this favour you owe her?"

"A date." He muttered, jumping when his sisters cheered. "No, it's not- not a _date_ date, she's going to kill me! She told me to bring food and a sword, I don't even _have_ a sword, let alone fight with one!" He pulled on his hair despairingly.

"Borrow one of mine." Ingrid offered.

"Oh, yeah, that'll work. Look at these twig arms!"

"Al, you're over-thinking this-" Aloe began, stopping short when she realised what he had said. "Those aren't twig arms!" She threw her hands up, her sleeves falling down. Ingrid held up her arms as well- they were all twigs. Alastor shook his head. It made no difference. Ingrid was built for close combat, she had to be small and fast, and the Hiccup-y nature worked well for her. Aloe had been born a hiccup anyway, it wasn't her fault, but it didn't bother her. She still chased around with her friends and had competitions and made flower crowns and dresses and everything that she loved to do. Alastor was a nerd. There was no other way of saying it, he was a nerd. He wasn't a fighter, he was a _nerd_ , a full-on dragon nerd, how in the name of all the gods was he supposed to _fight_? _With a sword_? Was he the _only one_ to grasp how utterly _insane_ that was? What was he going to do, pull a sword and years of training from thin air?

Aloe pinched his arm. "You're freaking yourself out."

"No duh."

"I know!" Aloe beamed, scrambling to her feet, tripping over them as she rushed to her bed. She dropped to her knees and started rummaging under it. She pulled out a box, throwing back the lid. "I've been making these too, they're meant to be good luck charms!" She bounced back to them, something clenched in her fist. She grinned, letting this something dangle from her forefinger. A bracelet, a leather strip woven with different coloured wooden beads. She jangled it in her brother's face. "Made with love!" She insisted. Alastor took it numbly, spellbound by her eccentricity. "Go on!" She encouraged. "They really are good luck, I wore one this morning and got pie!"

"You always get pie."

"More pie than usual!" She did a little victory dance. Ingrid shook her head, smiling. Alastor put the bracelet on, sliding it over his hand with a little difficulty. "I did try to get some sort f clasp on it, but it kept falling apart." She shrugged. "Oh well, you're going to have to wear it forever! When's your date?"

"Tomorrow lunch."

"Right! Ingrid, get him a sword and give him some crash lessons! I'll get the picnic sorted."

"How much pie did you get?"

"Well, I can't eat _all_ of it." She grabbed them by the wrists and pulled. Ingrid and Alastor exchanged glances and got up. Aloe beamed at them.

"How much pie have you eaten?"

"About three. And a half. Ooh, there so _nice_." More shared confused looks, Ingrid and Alastor went downstairs. The table was laden with pies. Aloe had even set some aside for the dragons.

" _How_ did you get _this much pie_?" Aloe just giggled mischievously, bouncing on the soles of her feet. Alastor regarded the bracelet in a new light. Ingrid did too. "I've got to get me one of them."

"You can only have one after you've taught Al how to fight."

"Deal."

* * *

Trips landed in the arena, kneeling as her rider dropped down. Alastor ran a hand over Spike's scales, his Nadder headbutting him gently in reassurance. Alva grinned at him and then gaped at the table behind him. The Jorgenson twins had helped him set it up- he couldn't really move the table on his own- and his sisters had brought some of the pies down. The Jorgensons had run off with at least a dozen of them, but there was still many left. "Where did you get all this _pie_?"

"Aloe."

"What?"

"I... don't know. She just had a lot of pie." Alastor hunched his shoulders.

"You Haddocks are crazy." He nodded, humming in agreement. Trips and Spike chirped at each other, starting a game of Tag around the arena. Alva stuck her finger in the nearest pie, beaming when she saw it was apple. "You know, if you get pie like this more often, you can always bring some to me."

"Uh, y-yeah, OK." She drew a knife and cut a large portion of pie, eating messily with her fingers. Alastor stared at her, bewildered. She raised a brow and he looked away. Alva had always seemed so disciplined and tidy, he had never imagined she would make such a mess eating pie. He looked over at the Nadders, who looked as if they were dancing, bopping their heads and showing off their wings. Alva laughed at the display, cursing when the pie's innards spilt against her front. She flicked the apple chunk away and smiled at Alastor.

"As much as I love pie, I came here to spar."

"Yeah, a-about that..." Alastor rubbed awkwardly at his neck. His sword was tied to Spike's saddle and he didn't particularly feel like interrupting the playdate. Alva was still looking at him questioningly, so he pointed. Spike hopped and turned, flicking his tail up and showing off his spines. Alva got a glimmer of a sword hilt and smiled. She whistled and Trips twisted her head, pulling a satchel from her saddle. She threw it towards her rider.

"Good job I brought a spare."

"Oh..." She held her sword with confidence, shoulders set back, ready to spar. Alastor took the other from her, a spark flooding his fingers as they brushed against her hand. He took a minute to get a proper hold on it, face burning as she watched him struggle.

"Have you ever fought with a sword before?"

"Sort of."

"When?"

"Last night."

"Ah. Ingrid give you a few lessons?"

"I... I w-wouldn't call them... _lessons_. She... s-she beat me u-up a bit a-and... w-well it's Ingrid, so..." He shrugged again. Alva experimentally tapped her blade against his.

"You're not even holding it right." If possible, his face felt hotter. Alva smiled softly, disarming him with very little effort. His sword clattered to the floor and he wrung his hands. "W-wouldn't you ra-r-rather just eat p-pie?"

"Well, I would. But it wouldn't hurt if you knew how to defend yourself. It _would_ hurt if you didn't know, so, pick that up. I'll teach you." Alastor fumbled for the sword, accidentally kicking it. He silently cursed himself, redder than redder than red when he finally got the weapon. _Why wouldn't the ground just open up and swallow him?_

Alva's smile warmed and she touched his arm gently, adjusting his hold on the sword. "See? Like that. Awkward lefty that you are, but it can work. Now, don't drop it, but don't hold it too tightly, you need to be able to fight, be flexible, anticipate your opponent's move and keep your guard up. Don't worry, you'll get it." She stood opposite him, raising her sword. "Ready?"

"No." He squeaked.

"Good." And she lunged. Alastor lost his sword in a second, partially throwing it in his panic. Alva doubled over, laughing, leaning on her blade. Alastor gnawed at his lip, hands toying with each other. "Oh my gods, this is going to be my new favourite day!"

"I'm going to die."

"You're not going to die."

"You're going to kill me."

"Not intentionally." She giggled out the last of her amusement, wiping at her eyes. "You make me laugh, I'm not going to kill you." His next words were unintelligible jumble and she shook her head, kicking up his sword and handing it back to him. "Don't throw it this time, OK?"

"Mm-hm."

"Al, are you scared of me?"

"Y-y-yes."

"Aaahh, bless!"

"N-no-not b-bless." He mumbled, fumbling with the sword again and nearly impaling his foot. Alva pinched his nose teasingly.

"You're adorable. Come on, chicken, fight me."

"I-I'd re-really r-r-rather not."

"Too bad."


	64. Chapter 64

**To Guest- I can be nice :P**

 **To That Guest- TUFF DID IT! *celebrates* If I'm honest with you, I honestly can't remember how pregnant Astrid is- I even forget that she is pregnant sometimes, which is why it's not really mentioned and then when I do remember, I'm too lazy/ it's too late to go and change it, but hey :P All shall be resolved in this chapter!**

 **To all, I have done the time-skip, however much time it was, let's say Astrid is due any day now. I've got the Alvastor out of my system, I need to write this:**

* * *

Alastor was helping his mother around the market, carrying her purchases and making suggestions- he had a good eye for detail and picked the best colours and textures of fabric for baby clothes. Not that Astrid's stitching had improved, but Aloe's was coming along nicely. "I'm glad one of you can mend clothes."

"I can mend clothes."

"You mend clothes like I do."

"Still mends them." Alastor shrugged, nearly dropping the leg of lamb. He checked its wrappings were still secure and glanced at his mother. She was rubbing at her slightly rounded stomach, contemplating two different sheets of material. Usually, Aloe would be with her to pick what she wanted to work with, but she was out gallavanting with Hiccup today, tormenting Ingrid and Stoick. Stoick had taken over with Ingrid's chiefing lessons, which left Hiccup free to give Alastor pointers on dragon training and how not to lose his leg. Alastor didn't mind his father's eccentricity so much now, because it was no longer expected of him to pick up the chief's mantle in a few years time. That responsibility rested solely with Ingrid and Alastor could not be happier.

Astrid turned to him, holding squares of fabric in each hand. Alastor hummed thoughtfully, eventually nodding at the striped one she held in her left. "Aloe loves stripes."

"I've noticed. You know, I would be _really_ surprised if Ruff and Tuff didn't hire her. I know she's only ten, but between her and Snotlout, they've got the textiles thing covered."

"Oh gods, could you imagine? There'd be throws and pillows and curtains and fancy bedding and everyone would have their own flower crowns- maybe they'll make flowers out of materials so they last longer."

"Don't forget bracelets." Astrid smiled, holding up her hand. Aloe's good luck charms had been a huge hit throughout the village, giving her ample funds to stock up on crafts and make more things. "Quite the entrepeneur, taught her everything she knows."

"Oh, sure."

"Did I ask for your opinion?" Alastor grinned. "Haddock boys." Astrid shook her head, giving her thanks to the vendor as he passed her a tablecloth of striped material. "Here, bundle all that up and get the Terrors to take it back."

"They'll eat it."

"Not if you give them dragon nip."

"Ooh, sly."

"I know." Astrid said proudly, whistling for the Haddocks' smaller dragons. Hildegard was at their home, having kicked them all out for the day as she just absolutely had to clean everything, everywhere. Astrid had done her fair bit of tidying, a 'nesting' thing for a expectant mothers Alastor had discovered, but she got bored quickly and had Hiccup do some. Do not ever hire those two to clean- their version of tidying was putting the mess somewhere less obvious. "I hope Mum notices the lamb, she does the _best_ roasts."

"Why can't you cook as good?"

"Hicc- I mean, _Alastor_ , I will slap you."

"You'll have to catch me first." He replied cheekily, puffing out his cheeks. Astrid pursed her lips, brow furrowing. Alastor figured he was in trouble for back-chatting, but then he recognised that look. He could hear the words before she even said them- _stop being your father_. He kept a safe distance after that, about ten paces back, stopping when she stopped, not daring to get closer no matter what she said. This left him struggling to catch potatoes and dropping a pie that splattered all over his boots and lower legs. Astrid laughed.

"Ooh." She said, stopping short, hand flying to her stomach. Alastor raised a brow. "Ow."

"Oh no."

"Al, don't just stand there."

"This is so typical."

"Are _you_ the one going into labour?" She demanded.

"Uh, no, but... there's... why...?"

"Go and get your dad."

"Uh-huh." Alastor stood staring at his mother, legs refusing to work. Astrid glared at him. "There's a baby coming out of you."

"And I'd much rather I wasn't in the middle of the village." Rangvald appeared, holding her kindly by the elbow. "Alastor." Astrid said firmly through gritted teeth. "Go and get Hiccup. _Now_." Her sharp tone snapped Alastor into action and he called for Spike. He and the Nadder took off instantly, Spike had barely even landed. They flew high enough to see the village sprawled beneath them; Alastor gave a Night Fury call, listening for the reply. It came a few seconds later and a plasma blast shot up from the arena.

"Sup, Al?" Hiccup smiled. "Whoa, you look like you're going to pass out, you OK?"

"There's a baby coming out of Mum."

"Oh. Right. Aloe, keep an eye on your brother." Hiccup turned to his dragon and they were gone within seconds.

"Are you alright?" Aloe giggled. Ingrid and Stoick ventured over, curious. Alastor felt light-headed. His younger sister took him by the arm and directed him to the side of the arena, sitting him against the wall. Ingrid peered at him in bemusement.

"There's a baby coming out of Mum." She mimicked. "Well done, Al, you've just solved where babies come from."

" _Why_ do babies come from _there_? Why can't they... just appear in a basket or something, like here you go, here's a baby! Why are you _laughing_?" He demanded of his grandfather. "This is serious!"

"Al, breathe, it's going to be alright."

"He's still laughing."

"Astrid's right." Stoick chortled. "You're becoming more and more like your father every day. Had the exact same expression you've got now when Astrid went into labour with Ingrid."

"Why are you panicking anyway?" Aloe asked. "Mum had me, you know what it's like to have a baby around the house."

"I didn't know where babies came from then." Alastor retorted, pushing his hands through his hair. "Don't start- _stop laughing_!"

"What took you so long?"

"Your mother, actually; told me off for trekking mud all over her clean floors."

"Why is she still downstairs?" Astrid grumbled.

"Mud all over her clean floors."

"If, as Al so cleverly noticed, there wasn't a baby coming out of me, _I would kill you right now_."

"Figured." Hiccup sat on the bed beside her. Another contraction rocked her body. "How long?"

"A few minutes." She hissed through gritted teeth, her hand finding and crushing his. "Are the kids OK?"

"Dad's with them." Hiccup chuckled. "You've only gone and scared the life out of Al! Poor kid." He shook his head. Astrid smiled grimly, shifting awkwardly. The door opened and their mothers entered. They checked Astrid, told them it might be a while yet. Astrid cursed profusely.

"I hate this part."

"Because most women jump at the chance to go through childbirth."

"Mum." Astrid said, glaring at her husband. "Throw him out the window for me."

"I can't. He's the chief."

"At least punch him for me." Hildegard looked imploringly to Valka. Valka took two steps forward and slugged Hiccup in the arm.

"And you can't play the chief card on me, I'm your _mother_."

"More like _abuser_."

"No, that's Astrid's job."

"Damn right." Astrid frowned at the door. "Gothi?" Valka sighed and Hildegard shook her head.

"I don't know how she's lived this long, but her apprentice said she's not able to make it this time. Gothi just wants to sit with her Terrors. We can always take the baby up to her, it's no problem." Hiccup and Astrid shared miserable looks. Gothi had been around for as long as they could remember and far longer too- she was ancient when they were kids, let alone twenty odd years down the line. Valka said nothing more on the matter, sensing their distress. Instead, "Keep her calm, Hiccup," she advised, "and try not to make her kill you." Hiccup frowned at her childishly at this, but nodded all the same. The two older women went downstairs, Hildegard- presumably- back to cleaning her floors again.

"Gothi-" Astrid began.

"I know." Hiccup assured, covering her hand with his other one. "It'll be alright though. She can give your dad a right telling off, beat him up with her stick."

"And Uncle Finn."

"Gothi will go to Valhalla and kick ass, you watch." Hiccup nodded seriously and his wife smiled. "And probably cuss them out while doing it; for someone who doesn't talk, she has such a potty mouth."

"And you're one to criticise?"

"Ditto?"

"Shut up."

"Make me." Her other hand came up and he thought she was going to punch him in the face- wouldn't surprise him- but instead, she grabbed a handful of his shirt and yanked him forward, kissing him like no tomorrow. The sure-fire way to leave him reeling and speechless and her triumphant and smug.


	65. Chapter 65

**To that guest- (Chapter 62) Thank you! And they are, yay! I've been wanting to marry Tuff and Ada for AGES now, sweet lord! :') And that's the only good poem he wrote, bless him, and probably the only poem he is ever going to write, honestly don't blame him, I can't stand poetry much either :P And (Chapter 63) WHAT THE HELL? WHAT FANFICTION DID THAT? WHY KILL HICCUP? D: Lefties for the win! Out of my whole family, there are only two lefties, me and my brother. Why are more people right handed anyway? And same! When Hiccup figured out he was left-handed, I was so happy! We need more lefties.**

* * *

Of all four children, this one had to be the easiest birth; not easy, but definitely the easiest. Astrid sat up against the headboard and pillows, crushing Hiccup's hand and completely annihilating it when the labour itself started. Thirty minutes of cursing, screaming and death-threatening her husband and then fresh, air-splitting cries of a newborn tipped into a cold new world. Like, temperature cold. Hildegard cut and tied the cord, Valka provided a blanket, and that was it. Panic over. Baby born.

Astrid cocooned the infant, shushing him gently, tears in her eyes. Hiccup gently tucked a finger in the folds of the blanket, pulling it down slightly to see his son's face. Bubba Haddock Four wrinkled his tiny nose, mewling, and shaking his head. He had a tufts of auburn hair and eyes as blue as the sky. One of his tiny hands wiggled free from the blankets and batted at the air, bottom lip out. "I don't know why you're complaining, your lower half doesn't feel like it's been ripped in two." Hiccup grimaced and Astrid smiled.

"Take him up to Gothi, Hiccup." Valka nodded encouragingly. "He seems healthy, but just to be safe."

"Come here." Hiccup took the newborn into his arms, smiling despite himself. "I suppose Al can calm down now." Astrid hummed, accepting a drink of water from her mother. "Be right back." Hiccup promised, venturing downstairs to find his Night Fury. Toothless snuffled the newborn curiously, ears perking up. He cooed happily, nuzzling his rider. "Thanks, bud." Hiccup laughed softly. "Let's get him checked over, yeah? No, no, ssh. It's alright." Hiccup gently rocked his infant son. "You'll get used to dragons, don't worry." He followed Toothless outside, saddling up and taking to the skies. He had to wrap the baby in his cloak as the wind rushed over them, a cooling breeze on him, but probably frosbite-inducing for this tot.

Gothi shuffled from her hut as the Night Fury landed, leaning more on her staff than ever before. Hiccup had to order her to sit down, "Sit down, before you fall down, please, Gothi. You should be resting, not running around after me." Gothi sat, scribbling something in the dirt. "No, it's fine, honest." Hiccup watched her write some more and smiled. "Yeah, here he is." She took the bundle in her arms, crooked fingers denting the blanket from his face. She ran a gentle fingertip in his mouth, checking his gums, lips moving soundlessly. Hiccup stood back, Toothless worming under his arm and giving a reassuring rumble.

Gothi held the baby for at least five minutes, checking his fingers and toes, arms and legs, feeling his back to make sure his spine was alright. Hiccup hadn't realised he had been holding his breath until she nodded and handed him his son back. She started writing again. "Thank you, Gothi. For everything. If-" He was cut off by her scratching in the dirt. "Gothi, I'm serious, let me-" She shook her head. Hiccup's fingers curled against his palm. "Gothi-"

 _I have done my duty_ , she wrote _, you need not fret, chief._

"But-"

 _I know. Now go. Astrid will want her son back._

"Are you sure?" She nodded and smiled. Hiccup squeezed her hand, a million things he wanted to say, but wasn't sure he could. Gothi bowed her head in understanding and shooed him away. Toothless gave the elder an affectionate lick and she scratched him under the chin.

* * *

The older Haddock children arrived, Alastor trailing behind his sisters; they had hold of his hands and were dragging him towards the Hofferson residence. Toothless was herding them forwards, having been sent to get them. He kept headbutting Alastor gently in the back, making sure he kept moving.

Hiccup and Astrid were sitting downstairs, Hiccup on a stool beside his wife in the comfier chair. Their new sibling was nestled in the crook of their mother's arm, faint snuffling noises emitting from the gathering of blankets. Hiccup grinned and waved them over. Aloe squealed excitedly at seeing the new addition, bouncing from foot to foot and clapping. Ingrid asked if Astrid was alright first of all- _sore and tired, but I'll manage_ \- before giving her new sibling a once over.

"Poor sod, looks like Dad."

"Rude." Hiccup muttered. "Al, come here. He doesn't bite."

"He? Aaahhh, I've got a baby brother!" Aloe exclaimed. "Hello! I'm Aloe, the best big sister ever!" Ingrid cleared her throat. Aloe ignored her. Hiccup sat up on his knees and pulled his eldest son into the group. "Bro, relax!" Aloe prompted. "Look how cute he is! Can I hold him?" She pleaded. Astrid carefully passed the infant over, adjusting Aloe's arms slightly. "Hello!" Aloe said again. "What's his name, can I name him?"

"No."

"What? _Why_?"

"We've already picked a name."

"Oooh, what?"

"Fenrir."

"I'm so glad I didn't have to make a girl version of that."

"Shut up, Hiccup."

"Sorry." Hiccup bowed his head and then looked up seconds later. "Fenrir Hiccup Haddock."

"No."

"Just one?"

"No. He's Fenrir the Second. Haddock. Deal with it."


	66. Chapter 66

**To Guest 1- Yes**

 **To Guest 2- I didn't feel like being mean to baby ^_^**

 **To That Guest- Thank you! ^_^ My old English Lit teacher gave me a book on John Keats' poetry because one of his poems was the only one I ever cracked BECAUSE IT WAS GREEK MYTHOLOGY, Cupid and Psyche,** _ **and she didn't even know**_ **\- this is the ex-military woman with a doctorate in American Literature (no idea why she was teaching English Lit, but hey, I passed all the same :P ) Literally the only time I ever talked in that class and I dumped a whole load of Greek Myth knowledge on them! ^_^ And I get** _ **why**_ **people kill Hiccup, but I don't get** _ **why**_ **, because FEELS. Again, the human body is so weird, I swear to gods :P**

* * *

Gobber was the first to take his helmet off, encouraging the wave of Vikings removing their headgear. Hiccup stood in the water with his father, Fishlegs and Snotlout, teeth chattering. Even now, Snotlout had the heart to smirk at him and mouth _fishbone_ ; Hiccup sniffed and ignored him. As one, the four men pressed their shoulders to the hull of the boat and pushed.

Gothi had been found last night, at first thought to be asleep. When Valka had lit the candle, it was clear she wasn't. The elder had passed, peaceful and comfortable, staff in hand, almost as though she would wake up at any second and bat someone around the head. Hiccup had made sure she had the staff with her as Stoick carried her, that morning, down to her ship. The entirity of the village crowded the shores and shallow waters, helmets pressed to their chests and backs straight as they sung the Hooligan anthem. Hiccup said his piece, trying not to fidget with his hands. Rangvald led the line of archers, Astrid at his side, week-old Fenrir in a sling against the small of her back. He was the last baby Gothi had ever inspected, too young to know the importance of it, but regarded all the same.

Toothless roared. His dragons echoed, sending blasts of flame and sparks into the sky as their own send off. Arrows littered the ship's deck, splintering and crackling as fire crept from their heads and crawled outwardly from the source. Hiccup looked round, seeing his three children standing with his mother and mother-in-law. Vadik stood to one side, nervously watching Hiccup. The chief considered him for a moment, looked to the burning ship and then nodded at the boy, the young man. Vadik seemed surprised, but recovered his wits quickly, before Hiccup changed his mind, moving to stand beside Ingrid, touching her elbow gently.

"You're trusting him again?" Snotlout's voice hissed in his ear. Hiccup hummed.

"Gothi told me off."

"She did?"

"Yeah." From his sleeve, Hiccup pulled a slightly flattened scroll. "Mum found this, addressed to me." He let Snotlout read the letter; he passed it to Fishlegs who then passed it to Stoick. "It's like I can feel her whacking me with that stick."

"As creepy as she was," Snotlout said, hands on hips as he watched the glow of the ship sail further out to sea, "I'll miss the crazy old bat."

"She wasn't crazy." Fishlegs said defensively. "Gothi was a _genius_ , Snotlout, you-"

"Don't tell me I didn't appreciate it, I'd never have had the memories of Thor Bonecrusher without her. Don't you _dare_ say anything." He growled as his cousin smirked and opened his mouth to tease him. Hiccup held up his hands, wicked gleam dancing in his eyes. Snotlout muttered something crude and marched from the water. Fishlegs followed after bowing his head in Gothi's ship's direction. Stoick returned the letter and Hiccup stuck it up his sleeve.

"Did I ever tell you Snotlout fell in love with Fishlegs?"

"Only a million times." Stoick shook his head and then smiled. "Tell me again."

* * *

 **I started this like four days ago and completely forgot about it. Only a short chapter for now, I need to find my notes.**


	67. Chapter 67

**To all- sorry I forgot to update this one for a while, I got side-tracked D:**

 **To that guest- I know right? She was really old when Hiccup was little and I don't think Vikings had that much of a long life span anyway! Not that the films are historically accurate, but it doesn't matter :P**

 **To Guest- thank you! ^_^**

* * *

"Babies are weird." Ingrid muttered. She and her siblings stood around Fenrir's cot. Fenrir was awake, two weeks old, staring up at them. He had wiggled his arms free from his blanket, tiny fists clenched in front of his chest. Aloe giggled and his head turned her way, seeking the source of the mysterious noise.

"He looks like he wants to fight." She smiled. "Who're you going to fight, baby? Who's trifling?" Fenrir kicked his left leg and snuffled, flexing his fingers. Aloe cooed. Ingrid rolled her eyes. "Oh, don't be such a sour puss, Ingrid." Aloe tutted. "He's cute!"

"You're always saying that." Alastor pointed out. "And then he cries or poops and you're yelling for Mum and Dad."

"That's because I can't change nappies." Aloe retorted, tipping her chin up defiantly. "It'll be alright once I figure it out." Ingrid sighed and stomped back to her bed, throwing herself down on the covers and snatching up her axe. "What's wrong?"

"Babies are weird." Ingrid repeated, pulling a stone the size of her fist from the drawer, running it along the sharp edge of her weapon. Alastor shrugged and waggled his fingers at his baby brother. Fenrir wiggled, fingers splaying on his right hand. He tipped his head to the left and gaped at them. Aloe giggled again, poking him gently in the tummy. He hiccupped and kicked his legs again. "Don't break him." She advised monotonously.

"What's got under your skin?" Alastor demanded, hand on hip. Ingrid ignored him. Alastor shrugged and looked back at the tot. He had hold of Aloe's fingers now.

"Why are babies so weirdly strong?" Aloe quizzed. "Look at their tiny arms, it doesn't make any sense!"

"They can support their weight holding onto something like that." Alastor told her. Aloe chucked Fenrir under the chin and he let go, trying to grab at her other hand. He kicked his legs when he couldn't. "Oy." Alastor said, gently booping the infant on the nose with his forefinger. "Don't you start throwing paddies, young man, or the dragons will eat you." Fenrir hiccupped again. Aloe pinched her nose and backpedalled quickly, leaving Alastor with the smelly baby.

He sighed, gingerly picking his brother up and carrying him downstairs at arm's length. Hiccup and Astrid were out running errands and interviewing people to find Gothi's successor. They had left the elder two in charge of Aloe and baby Fenrir. Ingrid didn't mind keeping an eye on Aloe, but she drew the line at babies. Fenrir's care fell solely to Alastor, which included nappies. He pulled a clean sheet on the table and placed Fenrir on it- the box of baby supplies was already on the table just in case. Alastor dug out a clean nappy cloth and the wads of material they used to clean him. Fenrir started to whimper as the cold crept over his chubby legs. "Now, what did I just say about having a paddy? I mean, seriously, you're two weeks old, what do you have to cry about? I should be the one crying, I've got to clean up this mess." Alastor wrinkled his nose. He dropped the dirty nappy and cloths in the waste basket under the table. He'd wash them later.

Fenrir stopped crying once he was back in warm clothes and clean again. He stared bemusedly at his older brother, hiccupped. "See? Nothing to cry about, you little drama queen."

"Are you talking to an inarticulate and completely unaware baby?" Alastor startled, nearly dropping Fenrir. Thankfully he didn't- as much as Astrid loved him, she would have his head within seconds.

Alva smiled and waved. "Thought I'd come by and say hello. I wasn't expecting for you to soil yourself as well."

"I-I d-didn't-"

"I know, I'm just teasing." Fenrir hiccupped again. Alastor sat him up against his chest, resting his head on his shoulder and patted him on the back gently. Fenrir moaned and wiggled, getting his foot caught on a snag in Alastor's shirt. Alastor quickly freed him and continued patting his back. "So, how are things?"

"Uh, th-they're O-OK, I supp-pose."

"You don't have to stutter around me."

"The a-a-axe doesn't h-help." Alva grinned wickedly, depositing her weapon on the table with a thud. It rattled the baby box.

"Better?" She smirked. Alastor just hummed. Aloe clattered down the stairs, got halfway and squealed. She vanished upstairs and Alastor could hear her chattering a million miles an hour. Ingrid barely managed to get monosyllabic replies in whenever Aloe stopped to draw breath- what was said exactly between the pair of them wasn't clear, but Alastor got the gist. So did Alva. "I'm just here to see what was going on. We were supposed to spar this morning, remember?" Alastor cursed, instantly telling Fenrir not to repeat that.

"Sorry, I... I got roped into baby duty-"

"No, it's alright." Alva reassured. "I know I'm not being fobbed off."

"I wouldn't-"

"I know."

Fenrir hiccupped and then burped, settling to rest on his brother's shoulder. Alva smiled. "I take it Ingrid's not interested?"

"No. Babies are weird. She must have said that eight times this morning alone."

"No stutter."

"No axe."

"No lies." Alva shrugged, looking amused. Alastor tipped his head back, trying to get a glimpse of his brother's face. He felt Fenrir's breathing even out and slow down. "Asleep." Alva told him. Alastor nodded his thanks.

"I'll be right back."

Ingrid and Aloe were grinning at him as he entered. He pushed the door shut behind him and glowered, feeling his face heat up. He put Fenrir in his cot and, without a word, left. Ingrid cursed. Now she was on baby duty.


	68. Chapter 68

**I didn't update the last two nights as I was at a friend's watching Harry Potter again ^_^ Apologies in advance for any mistakes, I'm dead tired D:**

* * *

"So, what's this about you nearly soiling yourself?"

"Dad!" Alastor protested, quickly hiding his burning face in his hands. He could hear his father snickering and glared at him through his fingers. "She made me jump." He mumbled, voice muffled against his palm. "I was looking after Fenrir and she snuck up on me." Hiccup smirked. Alastor dropped his hands and tipped his chin up defiantly, earning a bemused look from Hiccup. "You can't talk, Mum makes you jump all the time."

"Then maybe you should learn from that."

"Like you do?"

"There is no escaping your mother."

"Hey!" Hiccup startled violently, nearly falling off his chair in the process. Astrid dumped her axe on the table and planted her fists on her hips.

"You're home early." He murmured.

"No escaping me, _hmmm_?"

"I meant-"

" _Escaping. Me._ "

"Well-"

"Haddock..." She growled. Hiccup pressed his lips together and bowed his head. It was Alastor's turn to smirk. "Now," Astrid said firmly, fixing her eyes on her son, "what happened with Alva?"

"I was supposed to meet her for sparring, but... I forgot, I had to look after Fenrir and it... just slipped my mind so..." Alastor hunched his shoulders. "She said it was OK."

"Did you rearrange?" He nodded. "For when?"

"After lunch today."

"We'll make sure you're free. Won't we, _Hiccup_?"

"Yup." Hiccup squeaked. Astrid looked highly amused and took her axe back. Hiccup didn't relax, even when she had gone upstairs. "She's going to kill me."

"No escape."

"I didn't mean it like that."

"You're dead."

"I am."

"It was nice knowing you."

"Of course it was!" Hiccup frowned at him. "It's always nice knowing me!"

"Hackett begs to differ."

"Ugh, Hackett." Hiccup wrinkled his nose. "Sometimes I feel bad for what happened, but part of me is glad he's gone, especially after what he did."

"How are the twins getting on with those holiday homes?" Alastor asked, remembering the dynamic duo building on Hackett's land. They had dibbed and snatched it up in seconds; Hackett hadn't even left the island. Hiccup smiled at Alastor's question.

"They're nearly done. Couple more weeks at most and they'll start renting them out. They've already sent Terrors and messengers to other islands inviting them here to try out the Thornston Retreat. Gods know what they've got planned though. Top secret apparently." At Alastor's confused expression, Hiccup elaborated. "They've drawn up some new plans, something about a _centre_. From what I've heard-"

"Eavesdropped."

"Same difference. Anyway, it sounds like it's going to be the ultimate get-away spot. They won't tell me anything, even though I'm partially funding it. It's a surprise. And I have to wait and see like everyone else, no special privileges."

"Even though you're the chief and it's your money?"

"Something like that. Twonks, the pair of them."

"Gotta love them though."

"Yeah, I suppose so." Hiccup rubbed at his neck. Alastor noticed how tired his father looked all of sudden. "I'm OK." Hiccup assured as Alastor started to speak. "Just been a long week."

"Any news on Gothi's replacement?" Alastor asked gently. Hiccup hummed.

"Mum's covering for now, but she doesn't want to do it full-time. Gobber pitches in from time to time."

"Any candidates?"

"Fishlegs seems keen, but it means reworking his schedule for dragon training classes. Heather offered to take them on if need be, but we all know she's happier on the Berk Guard. Eret offered too. It's just... Gothi was the top matriarch of Berk and now we have two guys going for the position. It's really thrown me, if I'm honest with you."

"Well, who's the next top matriarch?"

"Me apparently."

"What?" Alastor laughed, thinking his dad was joking. Then he saw Hiccup's face and stopped, biting his lip to keep his giggles in check. "You can't be serious?"

"Snotlout started a vote."

"Oh no..."

"The next Berk Mother is me."

"Why?" Alastor started to laugh again. Hiccup didn't look impressed, sitting up. "You're the chief, you can't be Berk's new mum too."

"My point exactly. Snotlout said mums are meant to be good at multi-tasking."

"And mums are meant to good at household stuff too- Mum can't household for mutton." Hiccup shushed him, frantically checking the stairs before nodding in agreement. "Who else is there?"

"Hildegard."

"Perfect!"

"You think so?"

"Pretty obvious now you've said it."

"Yeah, true." Hiccup yawned into his hand. "Well, I'll pass it onto the council and see what they have to say."

"Nana H will be up to it, right?"

"Probably. You know how much she loves mothering and matriarching."

"Is that a word?"

"I don't think so."

"Want to make it a word?"

"Yes."

"Figures."

"Shush." Hiccup shifted in his seat and stretched. "Any news on Vadrig? Ingrik? Which one did we go with?"

"Both." Alastor shrugged. "And as far as I know, they're out in the woods on some training session." Hiccup's expression darkened. "I'm sure they know to behave now, Dad. You can be just as mean and strict as Mum when you want to be; Ingrid didn't look any of us in the eye for _ages_."

"Really?"

"Well, you wouldn't have noticed. You kept your head down. For a chief, you're very unobservant."

"Think you can do better?"

"Probably not."

"Then shut up."

"But I'm quite enjoying this conversation."

"Fine. Alva."

"Not enjoying it." Alastor slumped in his seat. Hiccup smirked. "What do I do?"

"Weapons bouquet."

"She'll clobber me."

"If she clobbers you, it means she likes you." Astrid said, coming down the stairs with Fenrir in her arms. "Why else is Hiccup so bruised all the time?"

"And not just bruised." Hiccup muttered. Astrid fixed a stern eye on him and he smiled sweetly. "Al, what have you got to lose?"

"Um, my head."

"Besides that."

"My arms, my legs, my insides- not anything I could live without, obviously."

"Obviously." Hiccup shook his head. "Don't do anything dramatic-" Astrid scoffed and Hiccup glared at her defiantly. "Just... ask her on _one_ date. No sparring, go for lunch or something."

"No big gestures." Astrid advised. "She what she has to say. If she says 'no', don't get upset or mad at her, it'll just make things worse for you." Alastor nodded. He wouldn't be angry if and when she did say 'no'. He'd be hurt, but he would understand. He wasn't exactly top-class dating material. "If she says 'yes', let us know. We'll sort the picnic- _fine_ , your dad will sort the picnic. Hiccup, clear your throat one more time and I'll slap you." Hiccup shut up. "Say you'll meet her in Toothless's Cove or something. Set the picnic up and wait for her. Remember, _no big gestures_."

"No big gestures." Alastor agreed quietly. Hiccup and Astrid looked at him and then at each other.

"Are you going to be OK to ask her?" Hiccup asked kindly. Alastor mumbled incoherently and they smiled sympathetically. Astrid passed baby Fenrir to her husband and moved to Alastor's side, putting an arm around his shoulders.

"It'll be alright. Do your best and smile, OK? And you won't Hiccup it up."

"Hey..." Hiccup pouted. Astrid ignored him.

"What if I do? What if she says 'no'? What if she says ' _yes_ '?" Alastor seemed more horrified at that. Astrid squeezed him in a quick hug.

"If she says 'no', carry on being her friend, keep sparring with her, keep racing with her. Do _not_ avoid her. If she says 'yes', picnic." Astrid smiled. "I know it's easier said than done, but you can do it."

"And don't worry if you stammer." Hiccup said, as though he had read Alastor's mind. "I'm pretty sure she finds it adorable."

"I don't want to be adorable."

"Too bad. You've got the Haddock Charm."

"He does not." Astrid shook her head.

"Well, he's got _some_ of it. Your Hofferson blood is drowning it."

"Hiccup, I will brain you." Astrid warned. Hiccup smiled knowingly at Alastor.

"When she's trying to kill you and says you're an idiot, she likes you."

"That's horrifyingly reassuring." Alastor took a deep breath. Astrid smoothed his hair back from his eyes, making a comment about his need of a trim. "Should I ask her today?"

"Yes. The sooner, the better." Hiccup nodded. "You'll do fine! Would we lie to you?" Alastor shook his head. "Then go. If you come back with a date, we'll get you pie. If you come back without a date... well, you'll still get pie..."

"Oy." Astrid said. Hiccup met her eyes. "Shut up."

"He gets pie either way."

"And you're going to get a slap either way."

"Why?"

"Why not?"

"Because I'm Berk's Mother."

"Hold up. What?"

"Oh, you're going to love this one, Mum." Alastor grinned, sitting up straighter. Hiccup frowned. Trust ridiculing him to brighten Alastor's mood.


	69. Chapter 69

**I've returned! I've been working and sort of lost inspiration for a while, but I am back now! Yay! I shall do another two chapters on this one and that will be the end of Third Crisis! I have plans to write a story for each of the Haddock children though, so never fear! The Haddocks will return!**

* * *

"Hiccup!"

"Tuff?"

"Hiccup, I need your help!"

"You've already robbed me of everything I own."

"That's not true." Tuffnut said defensively. "No!" His hands flapped either side of his head, clearly despairing. "How do you dad?" Hiccup blinked at him. Tuffnut surged forward and gripped his friend's shoulders, giving him a slight shake. "How. Do. You. Dad?" He punctuated each word with a shake.

"OK." Hiccup detached Tuffnut's hands and pushed them back, holding them for a moment against the blond's chest. "Firstly, _breathe_." Tuffnut inhaled sharply and then held it. "That means breathe out too, Tuff." He did. "Secondly, do you mean how to dad Vadik or-?"

"No, no! How to dad Vadik, we haven't... Ada's... well, what happened with Dagur-"

"Yeah, that's OK. I get it." Hiccup patted Tuffnut's shoulder and directed him to a seat. "What's happened with Vad then?"

"I dunno, H. Like, before the wedding, he was up for a good banter, we could have a good laugh. Now I'm his stepdad and he's just... I don't know, just..." Tuffnut threw his hands out in front of him, tipping his head back. Hiccup rubbed at his jaw. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No. I think it's finally sunk in for him though." Tuffnut frowned in confusion. "Right- when you were just dating Ada, it wasn't a permanent thing, was it?" Tuffnut shrugged. "It wasn't set in stone, right?" Hiccup nodded. His friend did too. "Now you're married. Following?"

"I think so."

"You and Ada are married, officially; you live together, officially; it's all _officially_ now and it's caught up with him. He's realised that this is the way things are going to be now and he's still processing it."

"Oh. Is that bad?"

"He might just be shocked."

"I'm not that bad to live with, am I?"

"It's debatable." Tuffnut's expression crumpled. "Hey, it's alright. It'll take some getting used to- look how long it took Eret to adjust to living with Ruff."

"She's horrible to live with. Fish oil and clothes everywhere." Tuffnut grimaced and shook his head, shuddering. "Is Vadik like that? Is he... adjusting?" Hiccup nodded and Tuffnut relaxed slightly. "So, do I need to dad?"

"Not necessarily. He may be a bit conflicted; look at who his real dad was, that's not exactly a good role model."

"But neither am I."

"You or Dagur?"

"Me. Obviously." Hiccup bowed his head and Tuffnut realised he had his answers. "Let me get this straight, H. I don't need to dad. But I can still be his friend?" Hiccup inclined his head, smiling. "And if I did have to dad him at some point in the future, you'll help me, right? Please? You're the one with the most dadding experience; if you can get Snotlout to dad, surely you can get me to dad?" Tuffnut searched the chief's face anxiously.

"Worth a shot. Admittedly, Snotlout was looking after babies and he had to start from scratch, but Vadik's, what, seventeen now?" Tuffnut nodded. "Then just keep an eye on him. You've got experience in, uh, stupidity, so... try and keep him from being stupid."

"Does that include any little ventures into the forest with a certain daughter of yours?" Hiccup's reaction was gradual, jaw clenching slowly, eyes boring into Tuffnut's. "Would you like me to go?"

"About fifty miles off a cliff. No dragon."

"Well, that's a shame." Tuffnut sighed. "I usually quite like our little chats."

"So did I."

"You do realise if they get married, we'll be officially related." Tuffnut beamed at him. "I will be Ingrid's stepdad-in-law!"

"That or dead." Hiccup smiled innocently, but it didn't reach his eyes. Tuffnut had seen that look a million times on Astrid and realised that, over the years, Hiccstrid had worn off on each other and now both of them were capable and experienced of killing a man.

"I think I hear Ada calling me. Lovely chat, H, I hope we can resume this some day." And just like that, he was gone. Hiccup moved to the door to see him sprinting down the hill, yelling for his wife that the lunatic chief had just put him on his hitlist.

"Am I hearing that right?" Astrid called from upstairs. "Are you going to kill Tuffnut?"

"I'm considering it!" Hiccup called back.

"May I join?" He looked back to see her at the top of the stairs, Fenrir bundled in her arms.

"Of course." Hiccup smiled. "I wouldn't dream of leaving you out, milady."


	70. Chapter 70

"Well, this is fun."

"What?"

"It's the last chapter."

"What are you on about?" Astrid puzzled. Hiccup smiled at her, chuckling to himself when she shook her head, casting her eyes to the ceiling. "If you're going to be exceptionally weird today, go and plague Snotlout."

"But I want to plague you. And what do you mean exceptionally weird _today_? I'm exceptionally weird every day!"

"Gods, you don't say." Astrid deadpanned. Her husband grinned wickedly. Astrid proceeded to ignore him, cooing over Fenrir. "I swear, if you grow up to be as much of an idiot as your daddy, I'll drown you."

"You said that to Al. He-" Hiccup gasped suddenly. "You staged the accident! The near-drowning, you _staged_ it!"

"Hiccup Haddock, I swear to _gods_ , if you don't shut up right this very second-"

"I'm telling!" Hiccup shot to his feet. Astrid moved faster than he ever imagined, grabbing a nearby chair with her free hand, swinging it round, its legs scrapping across the floor. It smacked Hiccup's legs from under him, he fell heavily into the seat and she shoved him forward, practically winding him against the edge of the table. Hiccup groaned and slumped over the surface, wheezing. "Abuse." He managed.

"Stay." Astrid ordered. Hiccup whined wordlessly and she left him there. She heard Toothless scuffle towards his rider as she into the back room, Fenrir grumbling in the crook of her elbow.

"I'm dying. You saw what happened, make sure they know." Hiccup closed his eyes. Toothless complained and started licking Hiccup's face. Hiccup coughed and spluttered, pushing the Night Fury away. Toothless chortled and started lathering slobber all over his human. "Toothle- ugh!" Hiccup spat and tried desperately to wipe his face on his sleeves, only smearing the mess more.

"Need a hand?" Hiccup peered through a gap in his arms, seeing Aloe. She wore her new pastel blue dress, made by Nana H, and one of her famed flower crowns. Toothless beamed a gummy smile at her, nuzzling and curling around her, but not layering her in drool. "Aw!" Aloe gushed, throwing her arms around the dragon's neck. "I love you too, Toothless!" He seemed very pleased with that, flipping Aloe up and into the saddle. Her crown slipped over her eyes, pulling a few strands of hair with it. She puffed those out of her mouth, pushing the headgear back up and smiling lopsidedly. "Onwards!" She declared. Toothless bounded out the door, her squealing and clinging on tightly.

Hiccup sighed, rising and heading to the back room to change into something cleaner, drier and not so fish-smelly. Astrid didn't even question it; there was no need to question it, it was Toothless. She sat in the middle of the bed, Fenrir laid out before her, changing his nappy. She was the only one to ever successfully change Fenrir's nappy without making too much mess- the tot didn't like the cold and kicked his feet, which prompted them to hold him gently by the ankles, but even then only Astrid was allowed to do that. Hiccup said it was favouritism. Astrid said it was pure skill.

"Can we please agree no more?" She asked as he dumped his drenched tunic on the floor, rummaging about for a new one. "Four is enough, right?"

"We keep saying that about dragons and we still need at least two more. Apparently." He added as her expression hardened. He turned back to the trunk, looking for his thicker red tunic, one he had gotten for his birthday. Astrid re-diapered and re-clothed her baby, wrapping him loosely in blankets to settle him for his mid-morning nap. She looked up, sighing quietly at the scars and burns criss-crossing her husband's back. She had had years to get used to them; even so, seeing them always made her angry and her stomach hurt. She was slightly relieved to see them disappear under his favoured garment. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"You're making the face."

"What face?" Hiccup pulled at the corners of his mouth with his fingertips, pouting. "That's not- I don't pull that face."

"Well, obviously it looks a lot better on me, but you do make that face, deny it all you want, but you do." He didn't even bother ducking the pillow. It smacked him in the face and Astrid smirked triumphantly. "Remind me why I married you."

"Remind _me_ why _I_ married _you_."

"I don't know. Maybe you were desperate."

"Maybe I just didn't want to get stuck with Snotlout."

"Like I said. Desperate."

"Aw, you're not sulking, are you?" When he said nothing, she cracked up laughing. Fenrir complained at her. "Oh, sorry, baby, but you've got to laugh at Daddy, he's silly." She settled the infant again, lowering her voice. "Hiccup, come here." He shook his head. "Stop being such a child and don't tell me you're _technically nine_ -"

"I don't sound like that." He mumbled.

"Yeah you do." Astrid snapped her fingers and pointed sharply at the bed. Hiccup made a face, dragging his feet and swinging his arms, leaning this way and that to show her he really didn't want to sit next to her, she was being mean, he was doing this very reluctantly. The second he sat down, he got a pinch on the leg. He simply raised a brow, as if to say _told you so_. "Ah, don't sulk." Astrid teased, curling her fingers under his chin. "I'd have picked you over Snotlout any day."

"How about the day I beat you in the dragon killing competition?"

"Well, not _that_ day-"

"And all the days I was winning in the training-"

"Hiccup, I didn't mean _literally_ any day, I meant-"

"Or the time I sort of kidnapped you. And Toothless put you in a tree."

"Hiccup-"

"And the day I punched Snotlout in the face and you missed it."

"I haven't forgiven you for that."

"Ah, good times." Hiccup grinned wistfully. Astrid rolled her eyes. "He still brings it up now."

"Oh, you know Snotlout. He likes to milk it."

"He always make it sound like it was yesterday."

"That's 'cos it was such a big shock to his system." Astrid laughed. Then pouted. "I wish I could have seen it, I'd give almost anything, your other leg included."

"Why _my_ leg? Why not yours?"

"Because I need my legs."

"And I don't?"

"No, of course not." Astrid smirked. Hiccup blew a raspberry and she tutted. "Child." She accused. " _I'm technically nine_." She mimicked, before the words had even left his lips. "Predictable little bubba!" She cooed. Hiccup stuck his tongue out, sulking again, hunching his shoulders. Astrid bowed her head, gently butting his chin and drawing his attention. "Hi." She smiled sweetly. Hiccup shut his eyes and hummed. "Big baby boo!" Astrid hissed. "Do you want nap-time too?"

"Yes please."

"Tough."

"Ah. Mean wifey." He shook his head. "Very mean indeed."

"Oh shush." Astrid smiled. "Someone has to keep you on all five toes."

* * *

 **And there we are! Just a little Hiccstrid to wrap this up! You guys are amazing, thank you all for sticking with me through this, all the reading and the reviewing, you didn't need to stay with me, but you did and I'm so grateful! Fellow Fanfictioners, you're the best ^_^**

 **For future reference- some of you know this already as you have asked, but there are plans to do a story for each of the Haddock children, so my HTTYD fic run isn't over yet! ^_^**


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